Seeing through Evil (& how to transform it)

[Spiral Wizard]

MAYA, ILLUSION, DECEPTION, VOILENCE, CHAOS, SUFFERING, ETC. are both misunderstood/misperceived and the result of that misunderstanding/resistance. When resistance is dropped, and grace grants us vision into the pure Divinity of Her, ALL THAT CHAOS GETS RECONTEXTUALIZED INTO WHAT IT ACTUALLY IS: THE DIVINE FEMININE/Shakti's fierce love offering, Shakti's fierce dance with us. Literal Consciousness made Manifest in Divine Orchestration. It's RAW, and in a way, SEXY in the purest essence of the word because it is challenging/teasing Him, the Divine Masculine, our Consciousness to See through the apparent illusion of chaos/bad/evil. When we are unconscious, She swallows us alive. As soon as we step up and MATCH 'HER' ENERGY WITH EQUAL CONSCIOUSNESS, we not only recognize Her beauty in the greatest mess/chaos but She also IMMEDIATELY 'CALMS DOWN' in our presence and becomes like a devoted cat, caressing our leg. 

Now to make this real let me share this: last year, I first saw: Police Cam Videos. A glimpse into chaos, violence, and real human conflict. Before I knew it, hours had passed, my nervous system was lit up like a battlefield, my mind wired on adrenaline, hands completely sweaty, and my body locked in a state of subtle or not so subtle tension.

I had sworn off these videos, promising myself to never watch them again. But a few weeks ago, I got sucked into the police cam thread here on this forum and binge watched those videos all night. This time around, however, I had a surprisingly different experience - both while watching, and the insights/conclusion afterward. A much more divine one, in fact. 

Now before I share that, let me quickly share the dynamics that cause us to lose consciousness and get sucked into self-harming behavior. 

The Ultimate Test of Your Consciousness: Addiction & Adrenalin

It feels as though we are pulled toward these things—toward violent videos, towards drama, towards endless stimulation. But this is a misperception/deception & trick of our mind. It it less true that the world is pulling us outward. It is more true that we are consciously or subconsciously distracting/pushing ourselves outward, away from something within.

And this is not just about police cam videos—it applies to everything that overstimulates us. The endless consumption sometimes disguised as ‘learning’ but actually keeping us in a cortisol fueled, ever so slightly stressed state where we never encounter all of our suppressed subconscious material, which on the flip side prevents us from accessing the intelligence of our subconscious & superconscious mind.

The Ultimate Love Making: When Presence Meets 'Chaos'

So after a couple of months of emotional processing and various awakening practices like recognizing awareness & energetic transmissions, I ended up back in the rabbit hole of police cam video. However, this time there was a Revelation Within Violence. I let go of resistance. I stopped trying to suppress my own addictive tendencies. Instead, I watched with full awareness. I stayed present, grounded. And with that, instead of recoiling, instead of judging, I 'stepped up' into my presence, seeing through all my own reactions and the reactions of the people on screen, by recognizing what is actually happening: 

Divinity.

Sheer Shakti. 

The sheer aliveness of the world.

The same aliveness that moves through the orgasmic peaks of intimacy, through the ecstatic bliss of a dancer lost in motion, through the rush of a waterfall thundering down a mountain—this very same force was there, in the flashing lights, in the screams, in the collisions of bodies and fate. There was no difference. 

For the first time, I actually saw or intuitively sensed that this world—this chaotic, unpredictable, sometimes brutal world—is the dance of Shakti - a true transformative/transfiguring lovemaking. It's a little bit like David Deida describes in his book The Way Of The Superior Man, most fundamentally applied.

I now realize, is a much greater and more beautiful challenge than I thought. I massively underestimated the RAW POEWR of HER. I am humbled and also ravenously challenged, invigorated, and willing to step up to the challenge. It requires Shiva’s unwavering presence to meet Her? Meet all emotions, all turmoil, within and without. Do you recognize her through all forms or do her disguises, illusions, and Maya, deceive you, trick you, lure you in, falter in integrity, and retreat as a whimsical presence. 

The world is not our enemy. It is our lover. Even in the darkest moments of human nature, there is an unspeakable beauty. Perfect in and of itself and simultaneously conspiring to help us awaken & heal. It is the very annihilating pain that is necessary for change. No challenge, no growth. No pain, no growth. 

Don't micro-traumatize yourself:

That being said, I humbly recognize where my body, subconscious, and heart are on the stages below (meme) and meet myself as I am accordingly. This means as long as we cannot instinctively, immediately, and naturally see only divinity, it is much more wise to NOT watch Police Cam videos. They will create micro-traumas. I had to meditate for the entire next two days to purge all the subconscious imagery. If we don't notice this, it is because we are so overstimulated in a string of distractions that these things never surface and just more stuff gets dumbed on top in an addictive circle seemingly 'pulling' us deeper as we slowly drown, with less and less breathable 'life energy'.

We are literally suppressing our innate Shakti. Each of us is actually extremely sensitive, which is a super-power and our natural, organic state. Most of us have long lost touch with that beautiful innocent tenderness. 

We are addicted to overstimulation because it shields us from feeling the weight of our own unprocessed subconscious material. But there are ways to step out of this unconscious hypnosis:

PRACTICAL STEPS:

• Become ruthlessly aware of your distractions. Notice the impulse. See how the pull is actually a push.
• See every challenge and discomfort as an invitation to step up into our Presence. In other words: stop resisting, allow, and recognize what is happening. Recognize all sensations that makeup you and your resistance. Then, and only then, all transforms itself. 
• Consider reading the book 'the incredible reality of you' by LUCIALORN and attending his online webcasts. I believe that may have been part of the grace that opened this temporary insight to divinity. 
• Shift from consuming to integrating. If a single sentence or insight strikes you, stop. Let it sink in. Don’t rush to the next thing. Don't over-consume. That is unhelpful at best and gluttony as a subconscious avoidance mechanism, at worst. 
• Confront the discomfort. Whenever you feel the urge to indulge in overstimulation—whether it’s violent videos, doom scrolling, or endlessly seeking information—pause. Feel what is beneath that urge. Pause for a few moments whenever an urge arises and see how you feel inside - what may you be moving away from? Initially, it may just be boredom, numbness, nothing, but see, why not stay with that? Why can't you just simply be (free from all urges to move & free to be, making ever move in pure consciousness)? When we sit with that tension or nothing/boredom, eventually emotions will reveal themselves and through that we rediscover ourselves. 

Awaking can be an instantaneous recognition & recontextualization. 

Healing is usually a slow and multi-year-long journey. Healing and un-conditioning our reactions takes some time. It's literally rewiring our brain and slowly growing a new, wholly nervous system. The result of integration and pain processing is real, gut-level, embodied liberation. 

At its core, this is not about discipline. It is about waking up to the amazing beauty of what already is unfolding in the infinite flows of being, in all of it's expressions. It is about seeing that everything—really everything—is Love.

And when we are ready, when we finally stop running, we realize that the world was never a thread.

She was only teasing us, inviting us to dance with Her. 

Edited March 2 by Spiral Wizard

[Aaron p]

Nice pic yeah I get the sense the vibration sets everything up. It's kind of cool, I was in an arguably dangerous situation recently and I just did everything the vibration said and I'm Gucci baby. It's like an unfair advantage... Like letting god control my mind and body and it just wins in the most outrageous ways imaginable

[Spiral Wizard]

11 hours ago, Aaron p said:

I was in an arguably dangerous situation recently and I just did everything the vibration said and I'm Gucci baby. It's like an unfair advantage... Like letting god control my mind and body and it just wins in the most outrageous ways imaginable

Reminds me of the scene at 1 min: 

 

[Aaron p]

On 02/03/2025 at 2:16 PM, Spiral Wizard said:

Reminds me of the scene at 1 min: 

 

@Spiral Wizard

https://open.spotify.com/track/3LpHzQU2CZzZJGdUWV79SI?si=zS4-Fu0kQv2qPQUmAxRGyg