From this morning :

[Sabth]

7:33am 

Am i in the wrong now? 
 

THE FURTHER IT GO THE WORSER THINGS WILL GET.

So i saw, me in this room/ in my brothers room . (In reality it was a whole lot nother thing.) i was changing like the mattress or the bedsheet into what was bought recently. My brother was there and he saw me.

Others too. In this dream the original look of the room was still the same. The bed and everything else. So i had a queen size bed which was my brothers. Initially in the original room. What had happend is a lot of things. 
And as i changed the bedsheet there was other men or boys idk and im not wearing clothes just undergarment and i asked them to go out. Before that i guess there was only my gender. 

And i saw that my mom is buying what i previously bought for myself to her granddaughters. And lastly , my bro tryna give me from the same brand too a pouch and i didnt take it and changed the bedsheet instead. Irl i only had a single bed and didnt wish to do anythting else. 
 

And then there was this scene , where some guy was trying to speak my sisters language and they are doing something like a woa that are symbolically not good or are co. And then there was an interviewer and she brought an apple. Literal apple and then there was this old lady who got really pissed off and throw a fight. She was mad. She got offended by it and was mad . 
That was the end of that dream . In reality i didnt even wanna be here. /stay. This is what happened to me. And it is permanent. Permanent change. Once ive changed or put my foot in something its mine forever no more changes. (They tried to change make the boys room a boys room back or the girls room my room back there is no such thing. This house had been changed in such a way that it would fit six couples in i guess. Because thats what they do . Back then. Each having their own room thats it. Thats what they have chosen. So yeah. And behind this, its between me and my brothers and there was a time when i would have been a little weak or sub compared to him or others so he took my room. So this had been fixed. A fixed thing. Nomore changes. I dont care about what the spirit says. (Because in my dream why did i got this dream where it had been returned to normal? ) or like when it first created. The house. So, the new sheet that i bought i meant for it to be in my new place. Just a little outside my house. 
and i had those kids following me. 

 

maybe this could be prevented if i move out. * In reality i wanna disown them altogether. *this is what had happened to me in reality. They would wanna follow me just for the sake of who knows what 

like i used to value a pet fish and they wanna do that too and i died and they would not even take care of those. Like following me for fucks sake. like doing it for the sake of who knows what. 
 

and would leave it to die. They are greedy for all my thing but as soon as i lose interest on it or give it up they would too. Its fuck .just for the sake of following me. This is why i think i needed those 

but this is just a reaction. It wouldnt solve the problem. ,maybe they needed to be nuked. This is why i think i needed *censored*. 
to say that they hv no free will is wrong too because they pick and choose. Didnt follow me in everything. Or have a preference. 
 

what am i back then ? Literally sucking my life energy that i didnt have. And i find it tiring. This was back then. And why wouldnt they follow their mom? The fuck. This is why i wanna follow a. 

8:17am

This is not at all the case yesterday. 

 

Edited Thursday at 08:31 AM by Sabth