When should I get married ?

[Hojo]

@Princess Arabia Gaslight

[Princess Arabia]

2 minutes ago, Hojo said:

@Princess Arabia Same for man and sex. You are also the definition of entitled.

Yes, I'm entitled to not be used and tread upon like a piece of meat and used as some man's gas station like you suggested earlier. I would be embarrassed as a man to say I only see women as sex objects.

[Hojo]

@Princess Arabia You expect man to slave away 1/3 of his 2/3 life for nothing. You treat him like a machine.

Edited Tuesday at 06:35 PM by Hojo

[Someone here]

27 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

When you are in a situation (health, money, job) that will allow you to have a cool, fluid relationship.

I wouldn't go flirting if I know I have a drug addiction problem for example, or if I'm homeless ; It's a recipe for disaster.

  

OK I agree thanks . Then I must get my finances handled well first . That's what I think too . And the more attractive the girl is the more value I must provide to her . Because I have pretty high standards. I ain't marrying any average girl. I'm hunting for a big fish .

31 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

I watched a lot of porn but I never watched weird stuff 😅

What energy were you looking for in relationships with men that you (thought) you couldn't get with women?

I was never actually attracted to a man irl .It's just porn .gay one .

[Princess Arabia]

1 minute ago, Hojo said:

@Princess Arabia Gaslight

Gosh! You have the same arguments everytime. 

[Princess Arabia]

1 minute ago, Hojo said:

@Princess Arabia You expect man to slave away 1/3 of his 2/3 life for nothing. You treat him like a machine.

Like I said. Boys won't understand this. Men will. I'm out.

[Someone here]

Mods please give warning and some restrictions from posting to Princess. She literally ruined the thread and it's a circus right now . But I only want serious discussion. 

[Hojo]

@Princess Arabia 0 argument, back pedal gaslight insult and leave. This is your argument style.

[Elliott]

13 minutes ago, Someone here said:

 And the more attractive the girl is the more value I must provide to her . Because I have pretty high standards. I ain't marrying any average girl. I'm hunting for a big fish

I have not found this to be the case, to me it seems whomever gets to her first. Depends on the values of the woman you're looking for though.

Edited Tuesday at 06:49 PM by Elliott

[something_else]

39 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

@HojoLiving with a man and expecting him to pay the bills is not using him as an ATM. Im so tired of explaining things to you in this field. You'll get it in a few years....or not.

In general I agree with a lot of what you wrote here but this made me laugh. How can you say that it's acceptable for you to expect a man to pay all of the bills but you get annoyed when a guy said he wants a woman who will cook and clean? You can't have your cake and eat it. Either both of these are OK or neither are OK.

[Sincerity]

Guys, please post mindfully.

Watch for emotional reactions. Respect one another. Strive to understand.

[Yimpa]

Related thread that is worth revisiting:

 

[Elliott]

I think a lot more straight guys would marry eachother if she were right.

[Princess Arabia]

3 hours ago, something_else said:

In general I agree with a lot of what you wrote here but this made me laugh. How can you say that it's acceptable for you to expect a man to pay all of the bills but you get annoyed when a guy said he wants a woman who will cook and clean? You can't have your cake and eat it. Either both of these are OK or neither are OK.

Cooking and cleaning are chores, bill paying is not. I am not living with a man under roommate conditions. I cook or clean if I choose, the bills aren't optional. For you it might be "can't have your cake and eat it", for plenty of men, they are happy to have you as a wife without you needing to do their chores and still keep you safe and protected as a woman by taking care of the household. 

Society has conditioned us into believing a lot of crap. A woman isn't supposed to be a maid to a man, but a man is supposed to provide for and protect his FAMILY.

She cooks and cleans if she chooses, bills aren't an option. I'm speaking of marriages or live-ins here.

Edited Tuesday at 10:38 PM by Princess Arabia

[Elliott]

Working isn't a chore.....

[Princess Arabia]

3 minutes ago, Elliott said:

Working isn't a chore.....

Cooking and cleaning for your kids isn't, it's a responsibility; for a grown man it is. He can cook his own shit and clean his own shit or hire a maid. Now, if she chooses, then it's ok, all im saying it's not a prerequisite for marriage. Personally, I would cook.for my husband so I'm not saying otherwise but I'm not doing it because it's expected but because I want to. If a man doesn't want to pay the bills that's fine. Get to stepping. It's all a matter of freedom of choices here. No one is forcing anyone. I'm not talking about casual relationships here but serious ones with futures. 

[Elliott]

1 minute ago, Princess Arabia said:

Cooking and cleaning for your kids isn't, it's a responsibility; for a grown man it is. He can cook his own shit and clean his own shit or hire a maid. Now, if she chooses, then it's ok, all im saying it's not a prerequisite for marriage. Personally, I would cook.for my husband so I'm not saying otherwise but I'm not doing it because it's expected but because I want to. If a man doesn't want to pay the bills that's fine. Get to stepping. It's all a matter of freedom of choices here. No one is forcing anyone. I'm not talking about casual relationships here but serious ones with futures. 

There's obviously all different kinds of relationship dynamics, OPs is not intrinsically unhealthy or one sided though. He didn't even imply her cooking and cleaning everything herself or sex whenever he wants it, you seem to just have been triggered.

[something_else]

33 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

Cooking and cleaning are chores, bill paying is not. I am not living with a man under roommate conditions. I cook or clean if I choose, the bills aren't optional. For you it might be "can't have your cake and eat it", for plenty of men, they are happy to have you as a wife without you needing to do their chores and still keep you safe and protected as a woman by taking care of the household. 

Society has conditioned us into believing a lot of crap. A woman isn't supposed to be a maid to a man, but a man is supposed to provide for and protect his FAMILY.

She cooks and cleans if she chooses, bills aren't an option. I'm speaking of marriages or live-ins here.

This is absolutely having your cake and eating it. You're saying you want the gender roles that benefit you to stick around but you want to get rid of the ones that don't.

Like I said, you're either OK with both of the following statements:

• a woman can say she wants a man to pay for everything;
• a man can say he wants a woman who will cook and clean

Or you're OK with neither. You can't say that one is acceptable while the other isn't.

To be clear I'm pretty much on the side of 'neither is OK' in the above comparison. I don't want a housemaid, but I also don't want a dependant living with me who isn't pulling their weight financially. For me, chores and bills should be split equally in most circumstances.

But I can see how a setup where the man pays for everything and the women does chores can work for some people. What I think is very selfish is this middle ground you're trying to argue for whereby the man pays for everything and you just get to sit on your ass and enjoy it without doing any kind of work.

And your reasoning of "well bills aren't optional but chores are" is quite a lousy argument. Chores aren't really optional either unless you want to starve to death in a filthy house.

Edited Tuesday at 11:07 PM by something_else

[Jannes]

12 hours ago, Someone here said:

So I really want a deep romantic lasting connection with a girl who loves me and I love her ...not some one night stand sex with an escort or that kinda bs ..I'm 27 ..Will graduate college and start working in any business company as an employer within two years given that I won't fail any exams and retake some semesters etc

Sounds good! 

12 hours ago, Someone here said:

The thing is I go through lots of stress everyday because I basically live alone in my apartment and I have to do everything for myself. I wish I could just go home and find a wife who can cook for me ..sooth me..relax me..give me a massage..suck my "thing "  ...you know basically a wife. 

This can sound quite offensive and outdated to women who live in more developed countries. A women can choose to live a household life but she can choose to be career focused as well. Excluding this potential of a women is offensive. Might be different in India idk. 

12 hours ago, Someone here said:

Also I got over my sexuality confusion..I'm not actually gay or bisexual. It was just that I overused straight porn to the point I wanted to explore gay porn. And now that I stopped watching porn for a while I see men as ugly creatures(no offence)and I don't want to sleep with a guy even if he is Ronaldo or smth . And I'm back to craving having sex with a female .

Damn can relate somewhat, watching straight porn just hurt at some point - like what is there to discover anymore..

12 hours ago, Someone here said:

Now I just want to get a realistic idea of when am I supposed to be ready for marriage. Because marriage is not just sex .It's a relationship that is ought to last for a lifetime .

And BTW I'm not getting a rearranged marriage. I'm not even thinking about marrying an Indian girl ..there is a lot of European girls in my college who i have a  crush on but not the balls to flirt with . So yeah let's talk about this I guess. 

Have you had a (long) relationship in your life?

[Letho]

12 hours ago, Someone here said:

So I really want a deep romantic lasting connection with a girl who loves me and I love her ...not some one night stand sex with an escort or that kinda bs ..I'm 27 ..Will graduate college and start working in any business company as an employer within two years given that I won't fail any exams and retake some semesters etc

The thing is I go through lots of stress everyday because I basically live alone in my apartment and I have to do everything for myself. I wish I could just go home and find a wife who can cook for me ..sooth me..relax me..give me a massage..suck my "thing "  ...you know basically a wife. 

Also I got over my sexuality confusion..I'm not actually gay or bisexual. It was just that I overused straight porn to the point I wanted to explore gay porn. And now that I stopped watching porn for a while I see men as ugly creatures(no offence)and I don't want to sleep with a guy even if he is Ronaldo or smth . And I'm back to craving having sex with a female .

Now I just want to get a realistic idea of when am I supposed to be ready for marriage. Because marriage is not just sex .It's a relationship that is ought to last for a lifetime .

And BTW I'm not getting a rearranged marriage. I'm not even thinking about marrying an Indian girl ..there is a lot of European girls in my college who i have a  crush on but not the balls to flirt with . So yeah let's talk about this I guess. 

 

 

@Someone here YES! The noble pursuit of lifelong partnership, or an elaborate plan to acquire a personal chef, therapist, and stress ball with benefits. Bold strategy son, bold strategy.

If this is a parody, 10/10 execution but if not, let's do a reality check aye. Marriage isn’t a cure for loneliness, stress, or a tragic lack of home-cooked meals. A wife isn’t a reward for enduring your own company, she’s a partner, not a paid subscription to comfort bud. Right now, you’re stressed from handling life alone and marriage doesn’t solve that it doubles it. If you can’t handle yourself, adding another human (with her own needs, emotions, and expectations) will be like throwing gasoline on a campfire and calling it climate control.

You don’t need a wife yet. You need self-sufficiency, confidence, and maybe the guts to actually talk to those European girls you crush on. When you stop treating marriage like a customer service upgrade, you’ll find women lining up like it’s an exclusive, invite-only event and suddenly, you’re the VIP of her OnlyFans. Isn't that most guys dream these days, to marry an only fans gal? Shit, with the way society is heading and the amount of money women make I can see a future in which men have lost so much character and sophistication that OnlyFans women become the go-to arm piece over Hollywood actresses.