First 2 MALT experiences I have a question

[El Rio]

After having some MALT sitting around for about a month I finally tried some last weekend. I put about 5 grains on a wet thumb and transferred to my tongue as an allergy test. Waited 45 min, no bad effects so ready to proceed.

The dosing on this is difficult because I don't have much context or experience with such small quantities. I read every report on every page of the MALT mega-thread and from what I could gather, those who have a very accurate balance claim that the red (10-15 mg) micro-scoops actually hold about 7 mg of this substance. I bought the black scoops (5-10 mg) which from a volume perspective seem to be 6/10ths of the red scoop. So I assumed one black scoop was about 4 mg. I filled one to slightly over the edge (5 mg?) and insufflated.  It came on within 10 minutes with a very warm, embracing feeling and was very mild. I meditated through the experience and enjoyed an enhanced clarity of mind with longer than normal spaces between thoughts. Trial 1...a success!  

So last night I made two small piles of 4 scoops each. So I estimate 12-14 mg in each. If the first dose wasn't enough, I'd have a 2nd dose ready. And wisely, I only dosed with the one pile!  It came on pretty hard  in about 15 minutes. I was trying to meditate but at times felt overwhelmed with this substance. Opening my eyes seemed to act as an anchor and returned me to some "normality". So I went back and forth for about 30 minutes, eyes closed, exploring my consciousness and then eyes open when it became too much. I got up when it felt like I had peaked and walked to the bathroom with no obvious issues (although I would not want to dive in this condition!). I sat back down on my cushion and apparently moving around brought on the real peak so another 10 minutes of drifting deep in mind and then holding my damn anchor when it felt like too much. Total peak experience about 1 hour.

The following hour coming down was very nice meditating under MALT. The clarity of mind is impressive with this substance. I think with another similar sized dose and now with sort of a road map of this experience (so that I am not constantly assessing my condition) I may get more out of it. But for me, there was no "God realization" or ego-death or anything dramatic like the "sea of love" as I  have experienced multiple times with cubensis shrooms.  Final note, it was 4 hours total elapsed time before I could sleep.  

So my question for experienced psychonauts is; Was my dose too small for a breakthrough experience? With a higher dose does one lose the ability to grab the anchor of safety with open eyes?  I may need this aspect of having to surrender.

Thanks is advance!

 

[shree]

That seems like a mild dose, still far from a breakthrough.

Try increasing by 5 mg next time, and if all goes well, add another 5 mg.

Take it slow and be very careful.

[OBEler]

"and then holding my damn anchor when it felt like too much. Total peak experience about 1 hour." 

What do you mean by that? Were you resisting?

[El Rio]

5 minutes ago, OBEler said:

"and then holding my damn anchor when it felt like too much. Total peak experience about 1 hour." 

What do you mean by that? Were you resisting?

Partially resisting,,,,did you read this? "I was trying to meditate but at times felt overwhelmed with this substance. Opening my eyes seemed to act as an anchor and returned me to some "normality". So I went back and forth for about 30 minutes, eyes closed, exploring my consciousness and then eyes open when it became too much."

It's fucking scary for the ego mind to lose control. 

[OBEler]

@El Rio ah sorry now I understand it.

Yes isn't it awesome that you can somehow control the intensity of this trip with opening your eyes or closing them? On 5 meo DMT this would not help much.

By the way in my opinion one black scoop of 5 Meo DMT/malt is around 8 mg and not 4.