How to deal with STAGE RED PEOPLE ?

[Kairos]

• How do you handle people with strong Stage Red traits—those entitled, power-hungry, and often manipulative types? I find their behavior frustrating and draining, and part of me wants to put them in their place, but I know that’s not always the best move. And I sometime am too big picture to take immediate action .
• See the thing is I have to deal with these sort of people quite consistently .Most of y'all live in West where people are more conscious but here you know stage Red and Blue is the norm for the most part .
• Even though I'm stage Orange and a bit yellow still I can't outdo their ruthless selfishness .
• I want to live calm and cool life focusing on my passions and vision but dealing with these people which I can't avoid sometimes drains my mental energy .

[RightHand]

Run baby, run.

[Whitney Edwards]

If you deal with them, it will mostly backfire in really bad ways since they're very calculated and manipulative. 

You have to take the higher road, build your resilience and endurance and purely focus on your work and yourself. 

The devilry will meet its own karma and burn itself and poof into smoke. 

Your own honesty will be your savior. If you know in your heart that you're doing the right thing with the right purpose, just go on fearlessly doing it. 

Nobody can stop you when your heart is right. Take care. 

 

[Kairos]

3 minutes ago, RightHand said:

Run baby, run.

Isn't the option right now baby 😂

 

[Kairos]

5 minutes ago, Whitney Edwards said:

Your own honesty will be your savior. If you know in your heart that you're doing the right thing with the right purpose, just go on fearlessly doing it.

Yeah but I mean I can only be good for so long if I have to deal with this bs .

Many times I rage and fight with such people but that too is unsatisfactory.

Edited Tuesday at 04:21 PM by Kairos

[Whitney Edwards]

1 minute ago, Kairos said:

Yeah but I mean I can only be good for so long if I have to deal with this bs .

Many times I rage and fight with such people but that too is unsatisfactory.

Yea it seems similar to a toxic relationship situation. You have to find ways to get out of it if it is causing serious harm. You can't fight against everything in life. When things take up disproportionate amount of time from your life, think about who is losing? They aren't losing with their devilry. But you'll end up losing precious time because of them. So the wiser thing to do is to completely remove yourself from that environment and those people. 

You have to do a complete SWOT analysis of your environment and measure the pros and the cons. If the cons outweigh the pros, it's time to give up and get away from it. It's not worth your time. The only thing matters is time and your mental energy and how you can save it from suckers. 

[Kairos]

@Whitney Edwards Right, I am planning my way out of this place eventually .

But look I'm not talking about one situation , from which I can just walk away .

It's a constant loop of dealing with people be it bussiness or relationships .Where they just come with the pre meditated plan to just maximize their benifit and sacrifice others and use every bit of corrupt ways.

So Instead of just walking away I just want a strategy to deal with them till the day I make out of here in 3,4 years . 

Edited Tuesday at 04:47 PM by Kairos

[Sugarcoat]

You deal with them by dealing with them as little as possible. Keeping replies as short as possible, not entertaining their talk, keeping potential emotional reactions hidden from them, don’t show them you’re affected by them.  Don’t feed them. 

[ryoko]

Strengthen your stage red. Stage red isn't bad. No stage is inherently bad. All stages have a purpose. There are absolutely beautiful expressions of every stage. Embody it.

If stage red's perversions are bothering you it's either because you don't have a strong stage red, or you have decided stage red is primitive and bad, or you're simply in some other stage and minding your own business.

I understand every stage have something bad and we often oversimplify and do a flawed sense making like "stage red is arrogant, aggressive", "stage orange is all about money", "stage blue is dogmatic", "stage green can't hold a job". These are very limited and downright wrong analysis of stages.

So saying stuff like, "ah Donald Trump and MAGA people, they're stupid stage red" can easily backfire and corrupt your sense making. Don't label people or groups as some stage, it is incomplete. Every stage is so much more than that. Spiral Dynamics is a model to learn the spectrum of each stage, the advantages and limitations of each stage. No single person can embody the full spectrum of even 1 stage.

Also, the order of stages, they are not order of superiority. For example, stage green isn't superior or inferior to stage orange, or any stage for that matter. All stages simply serve a larger purpose. Often we are stuck in 1 stage in tier one and hates the rest of the stages. And that's a necessary phase for the growth of that stage.

How to strengthen stage red?

Do something which requires a massive ego, work out, work on your passions, build sovereignty of mind, become integrous.

Edited Tuesday at 05:33 PM by ryoko

[Alexop]

@Kairos If you are forced to be around them tex. school colleagues, then you have to stand your ground and no show weakness. They smell weakness in the same way sharks taste blood in water, they see you weak they exploit you, bully you etc. If you can keep distance, just keep distance, ignore, run. 

[Applegarden8]

1 hour ago, Kairos said:

• How do you handle people with strong Stage Red traits—those entitled, power-hungry, and often manipulative types? I find their behavior frustrating and draining, and part of me wants to put them in their place, but I know that’s not always the best move. And I sometime am too big picture to take immediate action .
• See the thing is I have to deal with these sort of people quite consistently .Most of y'all live in West where people are more conscious but here you know stage Red and Blue is the norm for the most part .
• Even though I'm stage Orange and a bit yellow still I can't outdo their ruthless selfishness .
• I want to live calm and cool life focusing on my passions and vision but dealing with these people which I can't avoid sometimes drains my mental energy .

Endure, learn to ignore, focus on what you want to create in life or how you want to live or become a Guru. Enrich them, babysit them, tolerate them hoping they will reflect and change their values, give your very life away for it. We are but a bunch of crabs in one bucket, but we sit here like only the other farted not me. SO what, anybody does it it stinks for all of us.

Edited Tuesday at 05:30 PM by Applegarden8

[Recursoinominado]

[AION]

You deal with them in the language they understand. But preferable you avoid them which is not always possible. Every problem is an opportunity; opportunity to integrate SD red.

[Juns]

You remind them of stage blue. this doesn't work all the time but a lot of stage red people believe that what they are doing is wrong and that they should be in stage blue. I have personal experience with this in the context of stage red Muslims. If you bring up God and tell them what that what they are doing is wrong through religious justification they will be more likely to stop being so crazy. some stage red people are just pure red however or their blue aspirations are hard to figure out. 

[integral]

Tell them what they want to hear, concisely, the way they want to hear it, and get on with your life.

Also befriend them, gonna make your life a lot easier.

You don’t need to like them to be friend them. This is an important point.

[EternalForest]

If they're giving you trouble, treat them as if they're Stage Orange and frame everything as business. As Leo's said in the past, Red loves to believe it's Orange so being professional with them will command more respect than being sensitive.

[Kairos]

21 hours ago, ryoko said:

Strengthen your stage red.

So I need to go Full Machiavellian on them 👍

21 hours ago, Applegarden8 said:

Enrich them, babysit them, tolerate them hoping they will reflect and change their values, give your very life away for it.

I am not Gandhi bro , fuck them they make me angry. 

 

Edited 14 hours ago by Kairos

[Applegarden8]

3 hours ago, Kairos said:

So I need to go Full Machiavellian on them 👍

I am not Gandhi bro , fuck them they make me angry. 

 

Which means that some work needs to be done. I can't also. That's is probably the biggest sacrifice a human being can do.

[Myagooshki]

Well everybody has stage red traits. I do, you do, everybody does. I understand that you might be talking about people who are in core red. I would say it's possibly not the stage that you're in conflict with but rather other psychometrics. What else about their behavior bothers you?

[Leo Gura]

On 1/28/2025 at 8:10 AM, Kairos said:

but dealing with these people which I can't avoid sometimes drains my mental energy

Of course it does. At Red it's a battle for raw survival. So either you wrestle in the mud with the pigs or you find a way out of the mud. But if you're wrestling them there's no way you won't get dirtied. Sometimes the wrestling cannot be avoided, other times it can. Just depends on the specific situation. If a psychopath breaks through your front door with a chainsaw, you gotta deal with that on that level. Which is why police and prisons exist.

Edited 3 hours ago by Leo Gura