I'm taking a break after 100+ trips

[Archie]

How did your trips help you with changing career paths?

[Mel B]

@TheGod i used those pens from the candian website.

i think the half gram solution only contains a 150mg of 5meo dmt. That is Still enough for a couple of deep breakthroughs.

[BlessedLion]

20 hours ago, TheGod said:

I was first introduced to psychedelics in Spring of 2020 (I was 22). My friend stumbled upon a book about magic mushrooms and how to grow them. I had been wanting to try mushrooms for some time since I watched a few of Leo’s video on psychedelics and I was considering myself being “spiritual”. I laugh now when I recall that time because my mind was filled with ideas and concepts that I thought I was able to grasp, but nothing was further from the truth. After watching Leo’s video “How Psychedelics Work” I was very curious to try them out. At the same time my friend finished reading the book and decided to grow some mushrooms.

It took us a few months to grow our first mushrooms. I remember how my hands were shacking, holding 15 grams of raw magic mushrooms that I was about to take. I was very curious and fearful at the same time, but I still consumed them. The trip was very mild with some sense of light euphoria, feelings of joy (the same you feel as a child) and just a few insights.

My next few trips reveled the truth of the fact that my values and principles in life were not mine but were programmed by society: friends, teachers and people I looked up to: my parents and grandparents. For the first time in my life, I became aware of that. It was a very painful process, because I also realized that the career that I was pursuing was built upon my need for love, approval that was coming from my childhood traumas. I realized that I had to quit and the next day after tripping (it was my 5th trip) I quit the police forces. Even though it was painful, now, when I look at it – it was one of the best decisions in my entire life.

The following few trips were bringing me more and more insights about society and I was shocked by the fact that most of the people are like zombies doing wrong things believing in foolish ideas and chasing something that isn’t authentic to them. The first scratches appeared on the mirror that was called “Maya”. I also realized how blind I was in my life not seeing love from my parents, but hating them for the mistakes and wrong doings they did to me. 6 months of psychotherapy fell in comparison with one mushroom trip. I think it was trip 9th or something when I realized that Ego isn’t a part of my self, it is actually me. It was a very shocking realization, but that was the only insight that I got from the trip. During the trip I was also trying to grasp what was God and what was Ego, but I couldn’t, I had no idea.

My first God realization happened on 10-15 trip. I remember I was looking at myself in the mirror and I couldn’t believe that I was actually God. I was crying because I had been thinking that someone like me could not possible be God, because deep down I was sure that I can’t be God because I am bad and I am a looser. But the evidence was there. During that trip I was also tripping with my friend who said that he was seeing God looking at me to which I pointed out that he was God as well. When the trip was over, I was 100% sure that I misunderstood a lot of things and the idea that I was God was outrageous and stupid, I couldn’t accept it. Next 30 trips (during 2 years) were mostly about my personal issues because I tried to concentrate my mind on them and didn’t want to think about God or whatnot.

I moved in Canada in Summer 2022 and stumbled upon some website (don’t ask me I won’t tell you which one) where I saw a DMT pen. I was very excited and bought the pen. All of the trips on DMT that I had (around 20 of them) were God realizations, but no more profound than those I had on mushrooms. I never saw any entities or different worlds or some mother ayuasca nonsense. It was always me, God.

In November 2022 the website started selling 5MeO-DMT pens and I was very happy because I had watched so many videos of Leo talking about this psychedelic. When the pen arrived, I made just 1-2 seconds pull and I almost had a panic attack. People who have never tried 5Me0 you have no idea how powerful it is. It is beyond your imagination, so you’d better stop fooling yourself. Anyways, I got scared and put the pen back in the box and then in my closet.

A few weeks after I had a horrible day at work, I felt very angry and irritated. As soon as I came home, I took a shower and took out the pen from the closet. I decided to go slowly and also put some relaxing music. This was going to be the most profound day in my existence. As I was vaping the pen, I was going deeper and deeper. At the same time, I was soothing myself, talking to myself and even kissing parts of my body that were shacking. That night I vaped a half of my 1-gram 5MeO pen. As I was going through different dimensions, I was looking at things around me and I was literally zooming in infinitely into objects, especially my 5MeO cartridge. I was floored by the nature of my being. It’s pure beauty and pure love.  Things that I realized and experienced are beyond words and beyond communication. The only thing I remember that at some point I vaped so much of 5MeO that I awakened completely. Complete awakening terrified me by its profundity, I realized that all this time up to this point I was dreaming. My life and everything in it were just a dream. I also realized that I was fooling myself all this time and I realized why I was doing it.  I awakened to the fact that I created myself, my parents, everyone and everything in my life and that I had been denying it and using all my Gods power on self-deception. With this realization I experienced pure and infinite terror. I thought that I would never be able to fool myself anymore. Every trick that I was trying to play on myself and every rationalization were very easy to see, therefore, I couldn’t fool myself. At that point my panic was beyond any possible description. I was begging myself to go back, crying asking to come back. And while I was doing it, I was aware that I was asking myself. I spent one moment that paradoxically was infinity in my God’s agony. But of course, I was wrong and I constructed myself again.

Next morning when I woke up, I told myself that whatever I experienced was impossible and I must’ve misunderstood something because people pursue enlightenment and awakening but God seemed to be very attached to the dream.  I tried to disprove my awakening but over and over I would find myself at the same result. I even started shooting myself videos on 5MeO saying that I don’t want to wake up. Now I have like 10 of them on my iCloud (lol).

I’m almost 28 now, and the last time I did 5MeO was half a year ago. The result was the same – I told myself not to pursue enlightenment until I’m at least 30. I want to enjoy the movie, the dream. And here I am, enjoying my dream typing these words, fooling myself that there is somebody who could read this 😊.

 

Im so glad I dropped “psychedelic awakening” a while ago. What a joke compared to bliss love and joy of walking the spiritual path with integrity, patience, and trust. 
 

Psychedelics to awaken is just your ego wanting to control and know. 
 

Consider that true awakening is nothing like that. It’s not terrifying and you don’t want to go back, it’s like being home, it’s stable, your held, it’s loving. 
 

This whole, dreaming up everyone else is utter garbage. It’s probably the reason Leo went into this weird spiral and no longer makes powerful content. His shit was way better when he was sober and just tinkering with psychedelics. 
 

Honestly I think psychedelics were his downfall. Trapped him into his own echo chamber and delusion. it’s a shame. 
 

Fuck psychedelics. Everything is God anyway, now do you have the balls, discipline, and trust to unravel that through your OWN consciousness and practices (yoga contemplation meditation) or are you going to suck on your 5 MEO vape like a baby to a tit?

 

Psychedelics are child’s play and when your drugs wear off they don’t mean shit, as you clearly explained here. True God realization is subtle yet infinite. True practitioners take years and decades to integrate their awakening. None of the great masters ever credit psychedelics and they have been around as long as humans have.
 

Sure it’s much longer to walk the path yourself, less flashy. But it’s real. 
 

The only thing I agree with you about is to enjoy the dream and not rush it. Let the movie play out. But thinking your awake or realized is a fucking joke (sorry) 
 

PSYCHEDELICS ARE PSYCHIC MASTURBATION

[BlessedLion]

The only thing psychedelics are good for is busting open the closed, materialistic, scientific mind. Then drop them and do the fucking work 

[TheGod]

3 hours ago, Archie said:

How did your trips help you with changing career paths?

They helped me to let go of those paths that were not authentic to me. 
 

[TheGod]

2 hours ago, Mel B said:

@TheGod i used those pens from the candian website.

i think the half gram solution only contains a 150mg of 5meo dmt. That is Still enough for a couple of deep breakthroughs.

It is not the website I was ordering  from