What keeps people going through adversity? Maintaining a strong mindset.

[UnbornTao]

[Sugarcoat]

13 hours ago, UnbornTao said:

@Sugarcoat You sound confused, so clarify what it is you want, with this thread and with whatever you're going through first. And be open, do not dismiss or agree so readily. Being more centered in one's body rather than in one's head helps, too.

I don’t want anything in particular with this thread. But I do kinda know what I want with what I’m going through.

Fair suggestions

[Sugarcoat]

12 hours ago, UnbornTao said:

You think it’s self created 

[Sugarcoat]

16 hours ago, PurpleTree said:

Yea it’s wild. Maybe we’re too egotistical.

And taking ourselves too seriously.

But you know sometimes people say don’t take this or that so seriously.

But there’s obviously also no control in that otherwise we’d just laugh it off.

Maybe there’s ultimately no control but it still seems there is some control when you have a self so in that case try to control things as far as you can in your favor.

[UnbornTao]

On 1/12/2025 at 2:47 PM, Sugarcoat said:

You think it’s self created 

Who else but you? I mean, seriously. Whose experience is it?

Perhaps you should start by considering who you take yourself to be--a self inside one's head that is merely at the mercy of what occurs in the real, objective external world.

An exercise: Sit for half an hour, motionless and on the floor and whenever physical pain comes up, stay with it.

How you react to that can cause a lot of unnecessary suffering. After all, the bodily sensation is just a sensation; it is when you put up with it and resist it that another layer of pain is added on top of a mere muscular discomfort. Who does that? In this case: Who is taking a physical sensation and doing all kinds of painful shit with it?

You are stuck in the image on the left. When you move to the one on the right you'll cheer up, like that kid.

Edited 12 hours ago by UnbornTao

[Sugarcoat]

5 minutes ago, UnbornTao said:

Who else but you? I mean, seriously.

An exercise: Sit for half an hour, motionless and on the floor and whenever physical pain comes up, stay with it.

How you react to that can cause a lot of unnecessary suffering. After all, the bodily sensation is just a sensation; it is when you put up with it and resist it that another layer of pain is added on top of a mere muscular discomfort. Who does that? In this case: Who is taking a physical sensation and doing all kinds of painful shit with it?

You are stuck in the image on the left. When you move to the one on the right you'll cheer up, like that kid.

Do you hold the idea that suffering in general is self created? Depending on how that is interpreted will decide wether I agree or not. For example if there was no sense of self present, would there be suffering? I don't know because Ive not been without a self, but if no, then you could say suffering is SELF created as in being a byproduct of there being a sense of self present. But that to me is not the same as it being created by the individual, if that makes sense. So if someone experiences pain in the body, it's experienced as suffering because they are a self relating to the pain. But it's not the byproduct of the mental activity. Their mind saying "ouch this sucks" is not causing the suffering, the suffering is experienced as the pain located in the body, and as long as there is a sense of self present there will be that experience of pain as suffering. Meaning they would have to eradicate their sense of self to stop experiencing pain as suffering (or develop some ultra advanced mindfulness skills, if that is possible, im open to that, and your suggested exercise might be a first step to that )

In the case of mental suffering its a different story.

Quote

17 minutes ago, UnbornTao said:

Perhaps you should start by considering who you take yourself to be--a self inside one's head that is merely at the mercy of what occurs in the real, objective external world.

 

 

This would be a kind of self inquiry of some sort

[UnbornTao]

@Sugarcoat If you didn't care whether you survived in any way or form, would suffering exist? How does suffering come about? There's a reason why the Buddhists proclaim "No self, no problem". 

Edited Sunday at 08:46 PM by UnbornTao

[Sugarcoat]

1 hour ago, UnbornTao said:

@Sugarcoat If you didn't care whether you survived in any way or form, would suffering exist? How does suffering come about? There's a reason why the Buddhists proclaim "No self, no problem". 

Pain would still be pain (if a sense of self is there)

But yea I guess it’s true what the Buddhist say…

Edited Sunday at 09:59 PM by Sugarcoat

[UnbornTao]

51 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

Pain would still be pain (if a sense of self is there)

But yea I guess it’s true what the Buddhist say…

Okay

[Sugarcoat]

16 minutes ago, UnbornTao said:

Okay

😎

[Atb210201]

The strongest mindset there is out there is having faith in God and His Absolute Wisdom in all the adversities He sends to you to make you stronger and wiser; And having faith that every adversity is for your own benefit not against you, and you grow from them; And because God is Absolute Goodness there is no evil in him and in what he does.

In the end all the adversities and challenges you go through are gonna pay off for you and are kept recorded somewhere in the universe and will be compensated for; Nothing will ever be lost; You're gonna be rewarded much more than you are able to think for the difficulties you go through.

Nobody can claim a stronger mindset than this which guarantees you your peace and strength in difficult times even if you cry all the way through it with this faith you're unshakable in the end everytime.

Edited Monday at 07:14 PM by Atb210201

[Sugarcoat]

On 2025-01-13 at 6:31 PM, Atb210201 said:

The strongest mindset there is out there is having faith in God and His Absolute Wisdom in all the adversities He sends to you to make you stronger and wiser; And having faith that every adversity is for your own benefit not against you, and you grow from them; And because God is Absolute Goodness there is no evil in him and in what he does.

In the end all the adversities and challenges you go through are gonna pay off for you and are kept recorded somewhere in the universe and will be compensated for; Nothing will ever be lost; You're gonna be rewarded much more than you are able to think for the difficulties you go through.

Nobody can claim a stronger mindset than this which guarantees you your peace and strength in difficult times even if you cry all the way through it with this faith you're unshakable in the end everytime.

That’s def a strong mindset yea. 

[NoSelfSelf]

If one is emotional being then no matter what mindset you hold it will override it,then its all about doing the thing it holds you back by ignoring the mind/emotions and just doing the action without the thought.Then one doesnt operate on concious and subcioncious, but by the intent without the thought.If one operates like that then what comes out of you is your new you vs your old you.

[Sugarcoat]

2 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

If one is emotional being then no matter what mindset you hold it will override it,then its all about doing the thing it holds you back by ignoring the mind/emotions and just doing the action without the thought.Then one doesnt operate on concious and subcioncious, but by the intent without the thought.If one operates like that then what comes out of you is your new you vs your old you.

Yea . In the recent months in particular I’ve been trying to have a more strong mindset and acting despite the discomfort and it’s been working a lot of the time. But still sometimes I get really low and feel weak and suicidal thoughts can take over. But in general I’ve developed a more stronger self by help from that mindset. 
 

 

 

Edited 12 hours ago by Sugarcoat

[NoSelfSelf]

32 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

Yea . In the recent months in particular I’ve been trying to have a more strong mindset and acting despite the discomfort and it’s been working a lot of the time. But still sometimes I get really low and feel weak and suicidal thoughts can take over. But in general I’ve developed a more stronger self by help from that mindset. 
 

 

 

That's good next level is already have mindset figured out and then acting without a thought.Because when you brush your teeth you dont need to think and you are not suffering while doing it right?

[MarkKol]

On 08/01/2025 at 10:55 PM, Sugarcoat said:

I have wondered to myself what keeps other people going through adversity instead of ending it or at least thinking of ending it.

Normal people don't think about killing themselves. If life sucks, it just sucks; suicide is not their solution or a path they ever see themselves taking. Real suicidal thoughts aren't as widespread as you think they are. You see it as a constant option, someone next to you has never considered it.

If you're suicidal, you're probably missing some very foundational qualities of life, like 1. romantic and friendly relationships, 2. mental and physical health, and 3. a sense of direction and purpose, to say the least.

Other reasons might include being stuck in a hole you or someone else put you in, like trauma, learned helplessness, and stress. Ultimately, you have to solve your issue head-on if possible. It doesn't help to give yourself some long-winded reason for what the cause of your depression is; you need to be specific.

When I was majorly depressed about 5-6 years ago, it was because of a girl, and I didn't want to admit it to myself. I had a months-long feeling of sadness and an absence of desire for any activities, which is what depression is.