My name is Whitney

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

[Buck Edwards]

I found an excellent way  of avoiding the forum. 

Edited January 8 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

Woke up early morning today. And I feel like I need to attend to some things. 

Feels heavy. 

[Buck Edwards]

One of the problems is that I wake up too early. 

Hmm. And then I feel sleepy. I can talk to my sister today. 

[Buck Edwards]

I want to sit in a garden right now but I also feel like eating. 

[Buck Edwards]

Today is Thursday and it's a lazy day for me. Things started off with feeling sleepy and tired. Exhausted. I needed to rest but I don't think I could rest fully. 

I'm also on psychotropic medication. 

[Buck Edwards]

I ate healthy for the day. 

[Buck Edwards]

January 9 Thursday. 

 

Things cannot be resolved in just one day. 

You have to be careful. This is one week once the year began. I have pressures on myself. 

 

 

 

 

https://i.imgflip.com/9g3vj6.gif

 

Edited January 10 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

 

                

I have to talk to my sister about certain things. 

                

 

 

Edited January 9 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

[Buck Edwards]

It's okay. Don't worry too much about stuff. 

             

Just be on your own. 

               

Just short notes. 

                

 

 

 

Edited January 9 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

Everything on this forum is about a giant moral ego. And I want to live authentically. So I don't resonate with the forum's moral bias. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

I feel a bit angry at my mom today. She watches me all the time and it makes me uncomfortable. 

 

I want to fucking breathe without her watching me intensely. She just doesn't understand how bad I feel. 

 

Why do some people give birth if they don't know how to raise children? 

 

Imagine looking and talking to you non-stop all the time. It's so exhausting. Like let me breathe. She is like a police. 

 

I want my perspectives heard. I feel suffocated. My family was never supportive. It feels awful. 

 

 

Today I got out of the elevator and she was standing there watching me. I cannot even leave house in peace.. 

Then she will ask me a thousand questions. If I don't answer them, she gets angry. 

 

My conversation with my sister went well. At least this time she wasn't barking at me. 

I'm hypersensitive. I don't like someone watching me when I'm busy in work. 

If I'm outside, my mom constantly interrupts me with phone calls. It distresses me. 

Then she will constantly ask if my husband is okay.

 

I'm a normal person but she drives me neurotic and makes me nervous. 

 

Even my psychologist told her to stop this behavior. 

My mom was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

I don't need anyone to tell me anything. I don't need any advice. I just want my own peace. 

Peace. 

[Buck Edwards]

Where I live, I don't have a problem being NON-VEGAN. 

Big big big relief. Thank God. 

I don't have someone shoving their vegan propaganda into my face. Thank God most people are tolerant, understanding and don't have such strong moral egoes. 

This was troubling me for a long time. 

I think at the time being, it's best to completely ignore Vegans and their vegan propaganda. 

I mean just imagine walking into a restaurant or a store to buy chicken and someone shouting and yelling at you and saying that you abusing animals. 

That's ridiculous. It generates so much fear. It feels like being persecuted and crucified. 

I know this can be my own paranoia but I think my paranoia is shared by many people. They probably think the same way and that's why they are posting how ridiculous vegans are on YouTube. 

I personally feel disempowered and frustrated by this. Nobody likes to be insulted. 

I don't like anyone being shamed. Even shaming vegans is not a good idea. 

But vegans do engage in some overt tactics to get attention to their cause and these overt tactics make them appear a bit over the top. I understand their frustration. 

But cruelty is a part of life. Dictatorships are cruel. Lot of things are cruel. Even dating is cruel because a lot of people get rejected. School is cruel too because of homework. Should we just stop everything? 

 

Activism is good but activists need to consider both sides of the issue. 

Eating is not a crime. And my non-vegan diet supports my health.. 

My vegan diet gave me several health issues. 

I thought that I opened the topic for a good reason. To make people reflect on their own moral biases. Why their approach is not right. 

I think the same can be applied to gun laws.. Some people are attached to their guns. They probably seek safety in their guns. Maybe their sense of safety is shattered if guns are taken away from them. I used to think bad about gun owners. Now I understand how they must feel. 

It's difficult to create a world where everyone is on the same page. The majority needs to be considered. Some people will need to sacrifice their opinions for the greater good. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

Women have strong egoes. Depends on their circumstances. 

[Buck Edwards]

Sometimes I feel shamed when someone is subtly shaming me. 

How to get rid of this? 

Just don't take it personally. Let go. Such manipulators will always exist. 

You do you. Just be yourself. Just stick to your honest feelings. It's frustrating to deal with people who either don't value you or don't understand your feelings. 

Note to Whitney —

I understand you. You always wanted therapy. You always wanted understanding people. You always wanted to be heard. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited January 10 by Buck Edwards