Boys Don't Cry. Girls Do.

[Leo Gura]

1 minute ago, Emerald said:

That's a really unhealthy way of thinking about manhood.

Which is why women are not tasked with teaching men how to be men.

[Emerald]

Just now, Leo Gura said:

Which is why women are not tasked with teaching men how to be men.

Just think about all the men struggling with PTSD and killing themselves and drinking themselves blind, and you will recognize yourself as a proud contributer to that problem.

[Jannes]

23 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

A man cannot be a pussy.

That sounds very outdated from a stage greens perspective. 

I appreciate that being though was an important survival function. But nowadays is it as important in all jobs and domains in life?

Of course a police men should probably be though but imagine a programmer or a social worker guy, should they not be allowed to cry? 

[The Crocodile]

31 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

 

 

[Husseinisdoingfine]

8 minutes ago, Emerald said:

Just think about all the men struggling with PTSD and killing themselves and drinking themselves blind, and you will recognize yourself as a proud contributer to that problem.

Agree with this.

One of the positives of SDi Green is that it allowed feminine expression from men.

There is no healthy way to bottle emotions. This creates for psychologically sick people.

The exercise in the video above was created specifically to expel emotions.

[Leo Gura]

13 minutes ago, Emerald said:

Just think about all the men struggling with PTSD and killing themselves and drinking themselves blind

Oh, I know.

Quote

and you will recognize yourself as a proud contributer to that problem.

No. I don't teach the hyper masculine manosphere stuff.

Have you even seen me cry?

6 minutes ago, Jannes said:

That sounds very outdated from a stage greens perspective. 

Which is why I said it exactly that way.

Stage Green as become so foolish that it cannot even understand why men are not allowed to cry. Cannot even tell a dick apart from a vagina.

Edited Wednesday at 11:42 PM by Leo Gura

[Emerald]

3 minutes ago, Jannes said:

That sounds very outdated from a stage greens perspective. 

I appreciate that being though was an important survival function. But nowadays is it as important in all jobs and domains in life?

Of course a police men should probably be though but imagine a programmer or a social worker guy, should they not be allowed to cry? 

I agree. I see those old ways of hardening boys and men up as being an unfortunate but necessary adaptation to an older societal structure and the tasks that all men needed to participate in.

And of course, it caused psychological problems back then too. But survival required it. So, the men just needed to swallow their grief and their PTSD.... and drank it away or beat their wife and children.

But it just was the way it was.

But now, our society has developed enough to allow men to express themselves more fully and be more pro-social.

But a lot of men romanticize the notion of manhood and hold tightly onto a hyper-masculine mythos that's ill-fitting to our level of societal development. And so, they cannot be grateful for the blessings that contemporary society brings. And they disallow themselves from coming into deeper degrees of wholeness.

The cleave tightly to obsolete gender expectations that they want to larp as.

[Emerald]

4 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Oh, I know.

No. I don't teach the hyper masculine manosphere stuff.

Have you even seen me cry?

Yes, I've seen you cry. And I know that you don't teach a lot of manosphere stuff because you can see the problems with a lot of it.

But your previous post on this very thread said that poor psychological health is just the price you pay to be a man... and that they shouldn't cry or be in touch with their emotions. And "don't be a pussy."

And that's an incredibly harmful perspective for men and for society at large. 

And if men are teaching that to other men, then someone with some actual wisdom about how human beings work needs to come in and bring things out of modern warlord larp land and bring it back to reality.

You have to keep in mind that you have an audience. And many in your audience are impressionable young guys. 

And when you say these things, you're potentially putting them in positions where their mental health will suffer and they paint themselves into an anti-social corner.

I just really wish your were wiser and more mature about the way you approach gender-based topics.

[Emerald]

14 minutes ago, Husseinisdoingfine said:

Agree with this.

One of the positives of SDi Green is that it allowed feminine expression from men.

There is no healthy way to bottle emotions. This creates for psychologically sick people.

The exercise in the video above was created specifically to expel emotions.

Yes, it's incredibly important. If we bottle our emotions, it creates so many problems and doesn't benefit anyone.

[PenguinPablo]

@Emerald even Leo has to go through his Andrew Tate phase 

[Emerald]

1 minute ago, PenguinPablo said:

@Emerald even Leo has to go through his Andrew Tate phase 

It seems as such.

[The Crocodile]

I remember this story. The bassist Paul Raven for the band Killing Joke was a gang member, and when he got some gang sign on a release cover a bunch of the Mexican gang members started sentimentally crying. And then he glared, was like, "Fucking gang members crying?"

Nevertheless he had PTSD from watching his best friend get shot in the head.

[Jannes]

After a lot of hardening up through school it took me a lot of inner work to squeeze a little tear out of me again. I couldnt do it at first even with all the effort in the world. I watched a tutorial on YouTube to teach me how to cry again. I am now still celebrating when I get emotional enough to get wet in the eyes. 

[Staples]

@Emerald You have never directly felt the social pressure of being a man. So what do you really know of this issue?

Crying is perceived as evidence that you are not competent and strong.

A man's competence is like a woman's beauty.

A man crying in public is a bit like a woman dressing like shit with food all over her face.

Would you feel comfortable going to the oscars in a grubby tracksuit?

Crying doesn't garner any favours for men, he loses favours.

Doesn't matter how unhealthy or problematic it is. Losing favours is the result.

Crying at the wrong time can lose a man the respect of his partner, opportunities at work, opportunities for socialising.

Edited Thursday at 12:26 AM by Staples

[gengar]

1 hour ago, Emerald said:

That's a really unhealthy way of thinking about manhood.

It is unhealthy, but its less healthy if a woman gets killed by a bear because her man was crying instead of killing the bear. This situation is the premise of everything in society, fear of suffering and death. There are 2 sexes; one gives birth to new humans, and the other is, well, the other. So of course men as the "other" are evolved to protect and even sacrifice themselves for the "self" , the woman. This is why our physiology is stronger, evolutionary we are designed to be slaves for women basically. These are all the SD stage beige drives that can never be put away, only integrated healthily. 

The idea of the woman being the "self" gender and the man the "other" is also present in sex; for a het woman its about the energy etc in her own body, she is enjoying her own sexuality while for a het man it is really about "consuming" the woman, that sounds weird but I don't know how to put it differently.

But I do think Leo is putting his points way too harsh, because as actualising humans we should create situations where men can cry freely, and teach them how to deal with emotions, he should be pointing that out as a self help guru and not give fuel to the toxic boyz in his audience whom we see so very often on this forum.

 

Edited Thursday at 12:30 AM by gengar

[Emerald]

6 minutes ago, Staples said:

@Emerald You have never directly felt the social pressure of being a man. So what do you really know of this issue?

Crying is perceived as evidence that you are not competent and strong.

A man's competence is like a woman's beauty.

A man crying in public is a bit like a woman dressing like shit with food all over her face.

Would you feel comfortable going to the oscars in a grubby tracksuit?

Crying doesn't garner any favours for men, he loses favours.

Doesn't matter how unhealthy or problematic it is. Losing favours is the result.

Crying at the wrong time can lose a man the respect of his partner, opportunities at work, opportunities for socialising.

I've witnessed this dynamic. And I can see that there are social pressures. But of course I haven't experienced them myself.... at least not as strongly as I would have had I been male.

But I've seen the dynamics play out and how it messes guys up and creates all sorts of insecurities and quirks.

But regardless of how it looks to the opposite sex (though emotional intelligence is quite attractive in men, imo)... it's still unhealthy for men to bottle their emotions.

[Emerald]

7 minutes ago, gengar said:

It is unhealthy, but its less healthy if a woman gets killed by a bear because her man was crying instead of killing the bear. This situation is the premise of everything in society, fear of suffering and death. There are 2 sexes; one gives birth to new humans, and the other is, well, the other. So of course men as the "other" are evolved to protect and even sacrifice themselves for the "self" , the woman. This is why our physiology is stronger, evolutionary we are designed to be slaves for women basically. These are all the SD stage beige drives that can never be put away, only integrated healthily. 

The idea of the woman being the "self" gender and the man the "other" is also present in sex; for a het woman its about the energy etc in her own body, she is enjoying her own sexuality while for a het man it is really about "consuming" the woman, that sounds weird but I don't know how to put it differently.

But I do think Leo is putting his points way too harsh, because as actualising humans we should create situations where men can cry freely, and teach them how to deal with emotions. 

I literally said all this stuff in a previous post.

Look back at my previous responses and I talk about how that hyper-masculine "boys don't cry" stuff is a nearly-obsolete social adaptation for when men needed to be the ones to fight off bears and kill the neighboring townsmen who are looking to pillage the village.

But now-a-days that those roles are borne out by the institutions and technologies of our more developed societal structures, so many men just keep larping like they're battling the bears and going on the mammoth hunt... and screwing up their mental health in the process.

That's the issue with the romanticization and fetishization of the notion of manhood. It creates all kinds of maladaptive and arbitrary expectations that just create a lot of psychological drama for men and make it harder for them to be pro-social.

Edited Thursday at 12:35 AM by Emerald

[Staples]

16 minutes ago, Emerald said:

But regardless of how it looks to the opposite sex (though emotional intelligence is quite attractive in men, imo)... it's still unhealthy for men to bottle their emotions.

A wise man will learn how to have emotional intelligence without losing favours. That's the most functional and healthiest thing a man can do.

Just because we might be woke enough to see that gender roles are an unnecessary construction does not mean the rest of the society we depend on for our livelihood is.

Edited Thursday at 12:46 AM by Staples

[Leo Gura]

1 hour ago, Emerald said:

But your previous post on this very thread said that poor psychological health is just the price you pay to be a man... and that they shouldn't cry or be in touch with their emotions. And "don't be a pussy."

It's exactly what's needed for weak confused boys.

I say counter-balancing things to correct for imbalances, depending on the situation. 

Always note the context of the topic I am posting in.

This thread needed a dose of masculine realness.

I find it odd I have to overexplain this.

Edited Thursday at 01:19 AM by Leo Gura

[Hardkill]

What about all of Kobe Bryant's best friends including Shaq and Michael Jordan crying over the tragic death of Bryant and his 13-year-old daughter Gianna?

 

How about the Rock who admitted to crying often over his mom being suicidal when he was a teenager

He said in the Entertainment Online interview in 2014, “I didn’t want to do a thing, I didn’t want to go anywhere, I was crying constantly. Eventually, you reach a point where you are all cried out. The dreams I had, they’re dashed. There is no more football. My relationship was crushed. That was my absolute worst time… I looked in my pocket, and I had seven bucks. Wow! Seven bucks to my name.”

Why do masculine characters in tv series cry?