My feelings journal 2025

[Whitney Edwards]

Quotes are in date/month/year. 

 

 

 

 

 

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Edited January 24 by Buck Edwards

[Whitney Edwards]

Friday, January 24, 2025 

You have to put some effort in understanding others as well. You cannot be fixated only around your own feelings. 

This is the internet so you have to be more patient with people and that's fine, it's out of my way, I got honed into this with time and calibration. I needed a lot of adjustments and my husband always tells me that I did a tremendously good job at it. A lot of people told me that I had shown impressive growth. Even Leo congratulated me. So I'm happy on that front. 

Yesterday (or a day before that) I received a message from a guy on the forum. This was the message (name hidden for privacy) 

 

 

I'm so delighted to receive this message. It made my day. Knowing that my insights helped him. 

 

I'm thinking about joining the group but still a little apprehensive. (my fears around men Lol) 

But when I am mentally ready I might join. 

I'm quite happy. 

Although I didn't have a good day "that day" the message felt uplifting and meant a lot to me. 

When I get that feeling, I either steer clear or create more space. People emit vibes, and you can pick up on important things about their potential tendencies through those vibes. 

Ever get that 'uh oh' feeling around someone? I usually do a little vibe check and either gracefully sidestep or give 'em some extra breathing room. People, they radiate energy, you know? And sometimes, that energy screams 'potential trouble' louder than a toddler in a candy store. Haha. 

Now, I'm the first to admit, sometimes it's just me projecting my own anxieties onto them. So, a little self-reflection is always in order. But if that uneasy feeling lingers, and you're not sure if it's your imagination or not? Better safe than sorry, right? Time to politely excuse yourself and ponder the mysteries of the human aura.

Trust your intuition as you move along. Sometimes your intuition can bluff you though. So being cautious is the only advice. 

Also if someone is coming off as playing mind games, just dismiss them and avoid them at all costs, they are gonna be trouble sooner or later anyway. 

Side note - most people with good intentions actually make their intentions clear quite early on (in my experience). 

 

Edited January 24 by Buck Edwards

[Whitney Edwards]

I felt shy and sexually deeply repressed when I joined this forum in March 2023. I felt awkward almost scared to enter a male dominated forum like this. I remember having a formidable presence. How could a shy girl like me exist on here? It was merely impossible in my mind. I decided to take up a male username of Buck Edwards and somehow survive on this forum as a man and pretend to be a man. I thought this would be a safer Idea. I wouldn't get much attention or lousy messages from men leering at me. Neither would I have to constantly defend my position as a woman. It felt freeing. It felt I could do this. I did well and thrived for over a year. It felt non threatening. Over time I got tired of role playing as a man and it didn't suit me. I was fed up. I couldn't keep up the facade anymore. I just love being a woman and wouldn't want otherwise. My deepest feelings couldn't have been expressed role playing as a man. So I gave up. My husband was by my side. I felt hopeful and confident. That day I stopped that facade and came to my normal self. Yes it was an identity crisis I was battling with.. It was hard on me. I had my insecurities as a woman. I felt like I would get a torrent of messages from men. I have felt shy all my life. Even boarding a bus full of men frightens me. I can feel awkward around men. It's just how I feel and have been raised. I mostly grew up around females. My dad was the only male member in my family. My dad was a sturdy figure for me. Finally in July I felt liberated. My male pseudo name I adopted for this forum is stuck and that's alright. My name is Whitney. 

[Whitney Edwards]

Who cares 

 

 

Edited January 24 by Buck Edwards