Respect On The Forum

[RightHand]

Here's a cool angle to contemplate:

What if each of us had to pay $100,000 to access Leo's content and the forum? How would that change our relationship to it?

Leo is offering all of this for free, like candy bars.

We should see Actualized.org as a miracle, no other word comes close to describing it.

[Thought Art]

@AerisVahnEphelia Good point about not making multiple posts. I will work on that. I noticed it when I did it but I will improve.

With your regards to saying I was being disrespectful towards you. I think you know I wasn't. Please don't gaslight or insinuate violence towards  me or other members of the forum. I did provide a warning for that.

Again, conflict and disagreement is not the same as disrespect. Holding each other accountable to forum etiquette is not disrespect. However, these things can be done in disrespectful ways. 

I invite anyone feeling disrespected to me to let me know so I can discuss it and reflect.

I respect the members of this forum. I respect myself. I have conflicts with myself and others. This is part of being a group/ system.

My comment on your post was matter of fact, and because I am looking to cultivate a thread that is more focused and down to earth on how we interact on the forum, not these grand concepts of good and evil. Though, I acknowledge those contemplations as worth in other containers.

You are calling what I am promoting a "dream". I disagree. The forum has guidelines and we are very lenient towards you guys (Leo is lenient towards us) because we (he knows) know that growth takes time. This thread, and others I will create each month will be designed to remind us of what we should already know, or intuit as students of spiritual and personal development. If we don't already know these things, then this will be for those interested or who find value in learning these things.

Of course, people are free to choose how they act. This forum does have guidelines. It does have a purpose. People should ask themselves if they are interested in the purpose of the forum.

Edited December 6 by Thought Art

[Princess Arabia]

4 hours ago, Thought Art said:

@Inliytened1 Hey man, I noticed you quoted my entire initial thread comment. I think when people do that is muddies up threads. Perhaps single @ me or whoever instead of quoting such a long line of text. 

Being respectful is one thing, but telling people how to quote is another. I think that's a bit much especially since the original post wasn't even that long. The pic made it longer. 

[Davino]

@AerisVahnEphelia Of course all relative Love must be built up upon the fact that we are selfish limited entities. Ground 0 established in this sense

[Davino]

5 hours ago, Thought Art said:

How do you show respect through text and media on a forum?

How do you show disrespect through text and media on a forum?

I think an important point is to respect the Conscious Sovereignity of each Godhead while stablishing common values like Truth, Consciousness, Understanding, Evolution and Love. Or rather, maybe understanding the values of the other Sovereign entity and adapting the communication towards the alignment of them and hopefully the other Sovereign Consciousness will do the same in a mirroring effect.

5 hours ago, Thought Art said:

Was that respectful? What is respect? Why be respectful? What do I lose or gain from being respectful? 

Love is the issue

Love is the answer

Essentially, Love is the lubricant that makes everything work

So all the Forum needs is Love, to appreciate each other and to beam love as well as to receive it.

How can we make a more Loving Actualized Community?

[Davino]

52 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

Being respectful is one thing, but telling people how to quote is another. I think that's a bit much especially since the original post wasn't even that long.

It's a bad use of the feature. Why quoting a whole thread if you don't make anything with it?

Why do you do it @Inliytened1 ? Maybe you could clear up how is it that you take that decision of quoting all the thread instead of just tagging. I'm interested to know and understand your perspective

[Thought Art]

@Princess Arabia Hmm, that’s a fair point. It’s good practice though in my opinion not to do that. So I shared my perspective.

I think it would be a mistake to think I’m telling him how to act respectful. However, we can each work to communicate that as we communicate here. 
 

I think a distinction can be made between what my post is about, and a general request not to do something on the forum that I think muddies threads. There is no need to quote the entire multiple paragraphs to then write a sentence. The quote feature is great when you are responding to something specific.

Edited December 6 by Thought Art

[Thought Art]

@Davino Good question Davino. I like when we seek clarity. That’s a good reminder.

[Princess Arabia]

32 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

I think a distinction can be made between what my post is about, and a general request not to do something on the forum that I think muddies threads. There is no need to quote the entire multiple paragraphs to then write a sentence.

True. Just be aware also that being on the phone VS a computer sometimes the features are harder to access. It's easier to start the response with the @ feature to quote the name, but if one is trying to quote a particular sentence from a whole quote, it get's quite challenging using the phone. The mouse is what I use to swipe the quote and it highlights a blue color and says "quote"- on the phone i can't do that.

 All that said, I see your point.

 

[Kinjal]

I think that this forum is a distraction. It feels like an asylum. 

[Nemra]

40 minutes ago, Kinjal said:

I think that this forum is a distraction. It feels like an asylum. 

That's true, I think, about 80% of the time. People comment too much without trying to understand the context, which I'm also guilty of.

Also, there are people who do needless self-explanation.

The negative side of this forum is that it can make you think you have an in-depth understanding of something without getting out of the forum and doing research for yourself.

I have noticed that some people try to overcomplicate things and use big words to be seen as intelligent. Some are so reckless with their grammar or wording that they think it makes them too cool for this forum and shows their independence of thought.

Edited December 6 by Nemra

[Thought Art]

@Kinjal Oh yeah? Tell us more about that if you want. 
 

@Nemra Definitely important that we as users of the forum have proper expectations that this is a casual chat room about these topics surrounding personal development. Each of us relate to the forum differently, are in different seasons of life etc. 
 

You bring up good points. I can do better with grasping context before responding. I’d like to see better grammar too. Though, I don’t expect perfection. 

Edited December 6 by Thought Art

[Thought Art]

3 hours ago, Davino said:

How can we make a more Loving Actualized Community?

This is a question I want to ask everyone here, Mods, users, Leo, Myself. 
 

I mean, if it’s a personal development forum what are we doing here? Where are we headed? 
 

I think as Mods we can do better respecting each other as mods, and mods to users. I say this because I see it, have felt it in the past in conflict with mods, users, etc and my own shortcomings in these areas. 
 

Ideally, this forum and its regulars grow to a level of maturity and consciousness this place reflects the work and purpose of personal development, spiritual work. 
 

We come here saying we are interested in these subjects. But, are we blossoming? Can we smell the sweet nectar of Wisdom amongst us? 

Edited December 6 by Thought Art

[Princess Arabia]

1 hour ago, Nemra said:

That's true, I think, about 80% of the time. People comment too much without trying to understand the context, which I'm also guilty of.

Also, there are people who do needless self-explanation.

The negative side of this forum is that it can make you think you have an in-depth understanding of something without getting out of the forum and doing research for yourself.

I have noticed that some people try to overcomplicate things and use big words to be seen as intelligent. Some are so reckless with their grammar or wording that they think it makes them too cool for this forum and shows their independence of thought.

Well, people are different and we are varied in our communication styles. We are from various backgrounds and ethnicities and also educational backgrounds. It is to be expected on a forum of this nature the things you mentioned. They are not negatives, imo, just differences. We can learn a lot about people from the way we communicate and where it doesn't conflict with our own unique styles and also where we don't necessarily expect them to be communicative how we think they should.

[Princess Arabia]

We can start with proper forum etiquette where if someone poses a question looking for advice on how to solve an issue, that they can at least acknowledge the efforts of another's response, especially if it was with the intention of trying to help. At least a thank you would be suffice. A response isn't always necessary and sometimes appropriate; but, as adults I'm sure we are capable of using discernment where that is involved and is the case. A continuous conversation, for example, has to end somewhere and need not be responded to with every remark - even one remark can be enough. Another circumstance is if one merely makes a statement that doesn't require a response. I'm mostly referring to starting of threads anyway; and I'm also aware some responses can get blindsided and not seen, so I'm being overly general with these statements.

 

[Nemra]

Instead of receiving a response that engages in whataboutism, I would prefer to have my responses ignored.

Not responding does not mean he or she is always ignoring you. It could be the case that they are thinking what you said, saying "thank you" would seem cheap, or it is simply a way to end the conversation with someone.

A person who wants to help someone, by default, cares about helping them first.

Also, we are not working in a corporation to send a "thank you" every time someone responds to us. I think if a person actually receives value from someone, he or she would want to reply or would at least think about replying. However, they don't have to reply, as the helper has already done his or her job.

Edited December 6 by Nemra

[Princess Arabia]

14 minutes ago, Nemra said:

Instead of receiving a response that engages in whataboutism, I would prefer to have my responses ignored.

Not responding does not mean he or she is always ignoring you. It could be the case that they are thinking what you said, saying "thank you" would seem cheap, or it is simply a way to end the conversation with someone.

A person who wants to help someone, by default, cares about helping them first.

Also, we are not working in a corporation to send a "thank you" every time someone responds to us. I think if a person actually receives value from someone, he or she would want to reply or would at least think about replying.

You have totally deconstructed what i said and turned everything around. If you never responded to my comment, I'm not referring to circumstances like that, I'm not referring to responding every time someone responds to us nor am I referring to people simply just ignoring a response. If you read, understood and interpreted my statements correctly, you would have seen through the message. I will give an example.

If someone starts a thread seeking advice about something and someone took the time to respond to that thread giving advice they seek, I think it is proper to at least acknowledge that person's efforts of responding. THAT'S WHAT I SAID. They don't have to respond, but I'm saying i think it's rude not to. Please don't seek advice for something and when someone responds to give you that advice, you totally ignore it and not respond back with at least a thank you. THAT'S WHAT I'M REFERRING TO. Maybe shouting should be another, but sometimes it's necessary to get a point across. I don't respond to every comment and neither do I expect one.

Edited December 6 by Princess Arabia

[Thought Art]

@Princess Arabia Thanks for clarifying because I thought you meant reply to every comment as well. 
 

What you say makes sense. Interesting to consider. I have to think about that.

[Nemra]

42 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

If someone starts a thread seeking advice about something and someone took the time to respond to that thread giving advice they seek, I think it is proper to at least acknowledge that person's efforts of responding. THAT'S WHAT I SAID. They don't have to respond, but I'm saying i think it's rude not to. Please don't seek advice for something and when someone responds to give you that advice, you totally ignore it and not respond back with at least a thank you.

No, they don't have to respond, because the advice could be misinterpreted, misleading, false, stupid, etc.

Why should we dishonestly say "thank you" when we can avoid it?

Maybe in professional or social settings we often have to act this way, but this is a forum where we don't have to play those games.

Edited December 6 by Nemra

[Princess Arabia]

33 minutes ago, Nemra said:

No, they don't have to respond, because the advice could be misinterpreted, misleading, false, stupid, etc.

Why should we dishonestly say "thank you" when we can avoid it?

Maybe in a professional setting we must, but this is a forum.

I'm not saying one has to say thank you either. I said at least a thank you. It could be anything. That's the way you see it and i respect that. Personally I'm not just going to ignore someone that responds to a thread I made asking for advice and totally ignore the respectful stupid advices and only acknowledge the ones I deem fit for a reply as it was an attempt to help me solve my problem. If I know an advice is stupid, misleading or false then obviously I already know the solution and didn't need the advice in the first place. This is one of the few cases I'm referring to where I think it's appropriate and of good etiquette to respond to, and shows love and caring. I was addressing the notion of how we can show more love on the forum, and gratitude for people's time and effort in trying to help you is one. Sorry, if it seems silly to you, but it doesn't to me. If you never respond to this comment, it's not in the context of which I'm referring to and there is a difference. No issue there and quite appropriate, but asking for help and simply ignoring the responses to that help whether you see them fit or not and they were respectful, is just outright rude in my opinion. I did use tge word discernment and one can tell a response was meant to be disrespectful, sarcastic or just outwardly inappropriate. A "go take care of your own shit response" doesn't need a reply, but a "I'm sorry you're going through that and hear is what I think will help...etcetc" reply sure can show gratitude, love and care if responded to. I'm through making my point - see it how you please. The end.

 

Edited December 7 by Princess Arabia