How to deal with powerful and arrogant people?

[jacknine119]

I have policeman neighbour. We had little conflict about parking place. But this doesn't matter now. Honestly i have fear of such people because they also have power. What do you think how can i deal with such people?

[Sugarcoat]

Just be polite and don’t contribute to the conflict. Not much more you can do

[Yimpa]

21 minutes ago, jacknine119 said:

We had little conflict about parking place. But this doesn't matter now.

It matters if you want to have a better understanding of what actually happened. How did you respond to him? Did you give him an attitude? Did he yell at you? Get more specific.

[Yimpa]

22 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

Just be polite and don’t contribute to the conflict. Not much more you can do

There are times when authority figures overreach and it’s warranted for you to advocate for yourself. Context is key, though. 

[jacknine119]

Now everything is okay, but i ask this question for the future if any accident will happen in the future. So you say most of the time its better to avoid conflict. Okay.

[Sugarcoat]

2 hours ago, Yimpa said:

There are times when authority figures overreach and it’s warranted for you to advocate for yourself. Context is key, though. 

Yea

[Buck Edwards]

4 hours ago, jacknine119 said:

Now everything is okay, but i ask this question for the future if any accident will happen in the future. So you say most of the time its better to avoid conflict. Okay.

Well dealing with cops is a difficult thing. Because of the work they do their adrenaline levels are always very high. They can easily be impatient and escalate a petty situation. So you should handle it diplomatically and don't let stress dictate how you respond. Always respond calmly and be very cooperative. If they ask for any documents, show them that. A cop can be an asshole too but we live in a world where we don't have ultimate sovereignty over our lives so we always exist in a hierarchy of power. 

[Kksd74628]

@jacknine119

This is the most non BS answer

Build muscle, learn to fight and stand up for yourself. If not then everytime force comes you gotta play it cool and obey. Not saying that every little thing is worth drama, but you can't hide forever. Standing for yourself doesn't always mean fighting, but just stopping to obey. If the police is corrupt then you video record it in hidden and bust them from their work. If whole system is corrupt then everything's fucked up and nothing except trickery works.

[Schizophonia]

Maybe the guy smokes joints with his colleagues lol, he has other things to do than take the risk of abusing his power for a parking space during his rest time.

[Sandhu]

Well, you basically have fear of conflict. Here's what my strategy is when I feel the fear of any scanario, it works magic for me.

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Imagine the most probable worst case scanario that can happen when you get into a conflict with him. Remind yourself all the past difficult times you had gone through but you managed to eventually win over the situations ( You alive = you Won). Realize that you can face and bear any difficulty and challenge, Because you have confident that you will win.

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Don't be a pussy and bullshit yourself that you must avoid conflicts bcause you're a good person. You're not.

[whh2222]

On 11/13/2024 at 5:58 PM, Buck Edwards said:

Well dealing with cops is a difficult thing. Because of the work they do their adrenaline levels are always very high. They can easily be impatient and escalate a petty situation. So you should handle it diplomatically and don't let stress dictate how you respond. Always respond calmly and be very cooperative. If they ask for any documents, show them that. A cop can be an asshole too but we live in a world where we don't have ultimate sovereignty over our lives so we always exist in a hierarchy of power. 

wake up, pick a new avatar from the giant folder of hot girl pics, rinse and repeat. 

[Ulax]

@jacknine119 Bro I swear this is the biggest life hack.

Just active listen to people. In other words just repeat back what they say back to them in order to show understanding.

ie say ‘so if I’m understanding you correctly you want xyz’.

And keep doing it throughout difficult conversations. 
 

I got it from Stephen Covey’s book ‘7 habits of highly effective people’. It’s the 2nd habit ‘Seek first to understand then be understood’.

I think it works because it sets an underlying collaborative frame. 

Edited November 15 by Ulax

[jacknine119]

@Ulax Interesting! Thanks

[jacknine119]

@Sandhu Hmm ... Worst scenario is to be jail here:D

[jacknine119]

@SchizophoniaYeah, they don't care that much as i think maybe