Success Stories?

[2bequitefrank]

Been feeling directionless for a few years in regards to life purpose. I attribute my lack of success to being stuck in my mind for most of my twenties (27 now), suffering through a percieved depression and suicide ideation. I'd say I'm fairly receptive now but still find myself in depressive episodes everynow and then. I feel like Im ready to drop my past completely but Im having linerging doubts about whether or not its actually possible to live a mentally healthy life after experiencing years of depression and suicide ideation and specifically, creating this deep emotional victim identity. I'm wondering if theres anybody out there that has felt they've actually grown past their old depressive selves. If so, I'd love to hear from you. First off, is it possible? How bad was your mental state? How do you feel now? How does your life look like? Do you ever "relapse"? What are some practical things you did that actually made a significant shift in your perception? But above all, is it possible?! I've been reading some reddit posts of people saying they're in their late 20s or early 30s and have no purpose or depressed or gave up or this or that in hopes of feeling better but I find it feeds my pessimisim even more. I'd appreciate any response from anybody. Any thoughts at all. Thank you.

[LukeZ]

I've had similar symptoms I believe, but I figured out it comes from this place of unconscious shame. At least thats how it was for me. Things have been getting better thanks to recognizing it more and Internal Family Systems therapy. Here's a talk on how shame works, it can cause a number of things like depression, anxiety, not knowing yourself, social issues, and on. It's completely healable though.

 

[2bequitefrank]

@LukeZ Thank you man. Your response alone gave me hope. I'll give it a shot.

[DianaFr]

Yes, pulling yourself out from that purposeless depressive mental state is possible! Having a good quality of life is definitely possible. My story could be a little different than yours, though. I have a C-PTSD, social anxiety, used to have an eating disorder for a decade, and suicidal ideation have been a natural companion throughout all this. I'm in my late thirties now and I could write a whole book about what made me feel better which I'm not going to do now. The main ideas:

I accepted I was never going to be 'normal' which allowed me to start building my life for me instead of against me. I made care of my mental health a lifestyle. I will probably always have anxiety, I will probably always be prone to mental breakdowns and will have this intense sense of grief in me forever but that's okay. I'm no less happy because of that.

I became really good at listening to myself and experiencing every single emotion I felt. It brought me back to life and the sense of purpose naturally emerged from behind my shadows.

I continue to learn about myself through self-reflection. It's also a big part of my lifestyle now. Healing happens in phases. As soon as you're ready to uncover  another layer, new stuff emerges. I've made my peace with that as well. I can revisit the same events, the same memories or the same old stories many times, and every time the newfound awareness opens up a new aspect I couldn't see before because I was not ready or didn't have a template for it.

 

All in all, it's a life-long commitment to yourself. There's no rush, there's no end, just patience, compassion, and presence. It gets better, it gets worse, it gets better again. And you get richer and richer as you move through these cycles. 

 

Staying depressed and without purpose is a choice, though.

[Atb210201]

Yes, it is possible.

I was depressed and suicidal and I also attempted suicide but didn't die years ago.

I'm now also in a similar situation to you career wise. I'm 25 years old, and I'm not successful in any career yet; I've barely even started and kept on doing anything.

But I'm never suicidal anymore.

And I'm grateful to life and enjoy being alive.

The most important thing you should know for sure is that it's not impossible at all on the contrary it is very much more possible than you might think.

Just have faith in life, and it will take care of you. Just don't doubt it.

Never doubt it. Life takes care of you.

Just trust it and everything will be OK.

All is well.

Edited November 10 by Atb210201

[integration journey]

On 11/7/2024 at 10:22 PM, LukeZ said:

I've had similar symptoms I believe, but I figured out it comes from this place of unconscious shame. At least thats how it was for me. Things have been getting better thanks to recognizing it more and Internal Family Systems therapy. Here's a talk on how shame works, it can cause a number of things like depression, anxiety, not knowing yourself, social issues, and on. It's completely healable though.

 

This video is actually really helpful, thank you

[Raze]

try transform your self by Steve Andreas and 7 habits of highly effective people 

[ted73104]

On 2024/11/8 at 2:22 PM, LukeZ said:

I've had similar symptoms I believe, but I figured out it comes from this place of unconscious shame. At least thats how it was for me. Things have been getting better thanks to recognizing it more and Internal Family Systems therapy. Here's a talk on how shame works, it can cause a number of things like depression, anxiety, not knowing yourself, social issues, and on. It's completely healable though.

 

I wish I saw this at the beginning of my depression, this is really an answer to the problem. But then again I probably won't get what he's saying at that time, I had too much connecting the dots to do before I could fully take this in.