How Do I Know If I Want Something?

[Jordan wang]

I have many goals and dreams, but I don't know if I really want them, (AKA I don't know if they are really my goals and dreams)

For example:

I want to join the SFU varsity swimming team. I am really good at swimming, but doing so would require hard work. Furthermore, I don't know if swimming is actually my passion or not. Every since I was young, my parents had been throwing me into the swimming pool for me to learn how to swim, but not once had they asked me if I liked it or not, as a result, I don't even know myself if I like it. I just know that I am good.

Joining the SFU varsity swimming team would definitely hard work. I know I can do it, but with every stroke in the water, I feel like giving up, because you have to go through some inhumane training to join a team like this one. So now I ended up asking myself this question: "Do I actually like swimming?"

If I do, then why do I feel the pain in the water? Shouldn't every swim practice be fun and exciting? 

If I don't, then I guess I'll just find my true passion.

Are there any techniques to finding my true passion?

 

I guess another way of asking this question would be:

Should passion be intrinsically motivating or extrinsically motivating.

 

I understand that if I want to be good at anything it would require hard work which I probably won't enjoy (this is human nature), in order to get a payoff in the future. (Extrinsic)

But if you can be happy by doing something (intrinsic), even if there are no payoff in the future, it would be even better.

I just don't know if such a thing exist.

 

Some of my goals are: 

Joining the varsity swimming team, become a hacker, become an entrepreneur...

I always enjoy some aspects of it: the Payoff part, what I get if I actually achieved it.

But I don't actually want to put in the work.

Should true passion be soooo good that it would get me excited to the point that I want to work at it day and night, and in which I would even enjoy the process of working at it? Would I enjoy puting in the work into my true passion?

 

In general: How do you find your passion exactly?

 

anything helps,

thank you,

Jordan wang

Edited May 2, 2017 by Jordan wang

[egoeimai]

These two things dont go together. Pain is separate/independent from what you think you want. By this, I mean that pain will always exist,you cant do something to vanish it. So your choices are limitless. You can want whatever,desire everything or something or nothing! But you will experience pain however! Avoiding pain is the worst!

 Now for the second part of the question,how to find true passion,I really believe its a matter of circumstances (which u create) but with experience and knowledge in life,you somehow come to a conclusion! Letting things flow is for sure the first step to find them! But I really dont think there's something you seek. It just comes! From nowhere! You feel it and then you follow it. But then again,why does that matter? Whatever you choose doesnt matter a lot. Every choice is a choice. Good or bad,you name it! 

Good luck.

[PetarKa]

@Jordan wang My experiemce exactly!

I used to do physics and math, but only because my dad enforced physics as "the God" of science and this affected my thoughs about it - I "liked" it, though I didn't really. I hated every problem I solved. I somehow forced myself to do them and in doing so I became good at it.

Long story short, I realized I had been manipulating myself and shortly afterwards I said "fuck it" to the whole thing. Now I'm at ground zero, doing the course, looking for a new path, having faith I'll find it.

[Jordan wang]

@egoeimai How do I let things flow exactly? Just go about life with no expectations? Or is it trying new and different things everyday?

When the passion comes, how would I know that it is actually my passion? What does it feel like to suddenly come up with a passion?

Just curious, when did you discovered your passion?

Also are there activities that you can suggest me do in order to discover mine?

thank you,

jordan wang

[AndreiC]

Not everyone experiences passion in the same way.

Try some Cal Newport books my guess is he will have some things for you.

I for one found my passion while working a job I took without having any expectations. It wasn't anything as specific as swimming though. It was more about solving the most difficult situations I could find, be it product design, dealing with clients or supervising constructions. In the end it was more about adventure than anything else.

[McMonster]

I've always found my passions and deep interest come to me naturally seemingly out of nowhere. The more I do/research/learn about a particular passion the more I want to know...it's like a never ending pit of answers and more questions that need answers.

It can get quite overwhelming sometimes and I need to remind myself to take a break. I could easily get lost in my passions .

Then I question myself on what's the point of all time I spent on learning about and doing my passion and get disalutioned as I can't link it back to a greater purpose other my own learning.  

Now that I've thoght about it I realise I have the same handful of passions that I seem to cycle through.

Edited May 3, 2017 by McMonster

[Nahm]

If you focus on the feeling of passion, you will draw more of it. After days or weeks what you want will be easy.