Awareness is (VERY) curative

[QandC]

One of my favorite videos from Leo is Awareness alone is curative. It's very practical and most importantly very true.

I don't know why I didn't take the video more seriously back in the days, but the past few months I've really gotten into it. I started small, I wanted to stop saying "liksom" (swedish for "like") in every sentence. I also wanted to talk slower and be more calm in the presence of others ("the strong silent type like Gary Cooper, LOL").

It works great. I don't say "like" anymore while talking. I'm more patient with people when it comes to listening, and I do not state my opinion as much. Before I've always wanted to give my opinions to others and always share my perspectives (this forum doesn't count though..). It's actually a strength, to be able to shut up. When I was young I was extremely shy, and I thought being talkative was basically a superpower. Ever since then I've always tried to compensate - and this has led me to being the most talkative person in the room. Which in turn has become a self-fulfilling thing, since I feel good when I talk as if it's some Fuck You to my past self. Now I gotta go back, full circle, and learn to keep quiet.

I think mindfulness has been my biggest help here. A daily practice to become more aware of the phasets of consciousness leaves a room to become aware of your habits as well. I think from now on I have to get more deeper into deconstructing myself. There's nothing more I can "build" in my identity. Time to empty the cup.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qy_INVm_Pw0

Peace.

Edited yesterday at 04:12 PM by QandC