Conclusions after a 2-month solo-retreat

[CoolDreamThanks]

Did it some time ago, can conceptualise some of it now.
 

• Awakening is not complicated. It simply requires a complete letting go of this dream and all the idols we have made within it. Awakening requires total commitment.
   
• The practice of awakening is what every sage talks about - silence and stillness. We stop perpetuating the illusion and it dissolves. At the end of the retreat I experienced this dream dissolving and re-appearing. I know I can make it dissolve forever if I commit. 
   
• In our unconscious there is a fear of God. This fear surfaces when we reach the deep canyons of our unconscious and gets expressed symbolically in nighttime dreams. Horrific dreams that made me wake up drenched in sweat many times. It’s like ptsd. 
   
• Had maybe 5 experiences of Heaven. When I say Heaven I mean no body, no mind, no world, just infinite love. Visions of Saint Marry too.  
   
• Thinking is pain. When I fall into deep meditation - bodily pain disappears. When thoughts return - so does pain.  
   
• Saw clearly how God arranges the day time dream to allow for me to awaken by providing me with financial resources with minimal effort from my side. Beautiful. Thank you.   
   
• Sattvic diet is a must. So is light exercise. Yoga helps to sit longer. Sitting meditation is most effective, but I did a lot of walking and laying meditation too.  
   
• Psychedelics are permissions slips to meet God. They can go wrong if the desire isn’t pure and we go into it with ego as our teacher.
   
• Final step does feel like dying, but I did not go through the door of death, only stepped in with one leg and stepped back. Was scary.
   
• Books are there just to bring us above concepts and to teach us that this dream is suffering and our purpose is awakening. 
   
• Everything feels very meaningless, like walking around in a dream. Everyone is constantly blabbering about nothing, as though they will die if they shut up for a minute. 
   
• Saw how desires confuse the mind.  
   
• Saw how manifestation is a trap and will work only enough to keep you chasing for more. Like sex and all other idols. That’s how this illusion is set up. Seek and do not find is the name of this game.  
   
• Noticed the more meditative I become the more attracted I am to white, simple clothing. I think clothing is an expression of who we are. You can glance at someone and know their priorities, their internal world. 
   
• This post is meaningless. There is no one to share with. 

Edited September 25 by CoolDreamThanks

[Javfly33]

wow, seems a tremendous profound work! All great points that i resonate with deeply...except the last one. It is not meaningless this post, very full of value and wisdom. See you in heaven soon 🙌💙

[Leo Gura]

Great work!

[Princess Arabia]

46 minutes ago, CoolDreamThanks said:

Everything feels very meaningless, like walking around in a dream. Everyone is constantly blabbering about nothing, as though they will die if they shut up for a minute. 

This made me chuckle. Great post. You actually came across my mind a few days ago, btw. Happens all the time when people disappear for awhile then reappear. Seems like I sense them coming.

[Buck Edwards]

Are these the same kind of insights people get in a psychedelic trip? 

[integration journey]

Wow very beautifully said. I’m curious why do you think Satvic diet is a must ? 

[RightHand]

Very cool insights. Thanks for sharing.

[Keryo Koffa]

7 hours ago, Buck Edwards said:

Are these the same kind of insights people get in a psychedelic trip? 

Psychedelics shift your frequencies & give you perspective.

There are many overlapping insights but it's also individual.

Progressing by letting go of karma & immersion is common.

Psychedelics are peaks though, you actually gotta transform.

Edited September 26 by Keryo Koffa

[CoolDreamThanks]

6 hours ago, integration journey said:

Wow very beautifully said. I’m curious why do you think Satvic diet is a must ? 

It calms down the system. It’s the diet most suited for most humans. It’s light and harmonious, like God himself.  It helps you feel better and it’s much easier to meditate when you feel good. Digestion is linked to the mind, so if you eat easy to digest foods, the mind will be easier to manage. 
 

It’s also saying - I give myself fully to you, God. Because you stop trying to get satisfaction from food and only look to God for joy. I did learn to enjoy simple food after the addiction for spicy fatty sugary food went away.
 

However, I know people have unique health issues and for them, it might not be the best.  
 

Also, when I am not on a retreat I don’t eat sattivic. Love burgers, pizza, churrios, they are a few of my idols in this dream.  
 

Yet, whenever we seek for pleasure through the body we eventually find pain. I try to eat without guilt, but I know the consequences of it. 

[CoolDreamThanks]

9 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

wow, seems a tremendous profound work! All great points that i resonate with deeply...except the last one. It is not meaningless this post, very full of value and wisdom. See you in heaven soon 🙌💙

Thank you and happy to hear that. 🖤  

On the other hand, I do think that it is perhaps one of, if not the most, meaningful thing this body can be used for - to communicate with the purpose of awakening.  
 

thank you for pointing that out 🙏

Edited September 26 by CoolDreamThanks
Grammar

[CoolDreamThanks]

8 hours ago, Princess Arabia said:

This made me chuckle. Great post. You actually came across my mind a few days ago, btw. Happens all the time when people disappear for awhile then reappear. Seems like I sense them coming.

Hey, happy to see ya. Hehe, perhaps premonition is inherent to our minds, but just like other gifts, it can be covered up by the ego. We are all one, so it does make sense.

 

8 hours ago, Buck Edwards said:

Are these the same kind of insights people get in a psychedelic trip? 

Dunno. 

[CoolDreamThanks]

9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Great work!

Thank you! 

 

4 hours ago, RightHand said:

Very cool insights. Thanks for sharing.

Thanks! 

[caspex]

Hey, nice insights, I would like to ask you a few questions.

 

How do you view emotions?

May you compare them with thoughts, what would be your insights?

Just like how thoughts can be turned off and used productively instead of compulsively, can this insight translate into emotions?

Just like how thoughts can be geared towards better thinking by consuming better both biologically and mentally, how would you compared that to emotions?

How interconnected at thoughts and emotions? Which would you consider more dominant, if any?

 

Sorry for asking a lot, I am just interested in your perspective.

[CoolDreamThanks]

@caspex Hi, I think emotions are a product of your beliefs and the thoughts that arise from those beliefs.  
 
If you believe that life is materialistic, made of atoms and that’s it, you will feel and live one way, but if you think that life is a divine creation you will feel another way.

You can also generate emotions by thinking specific thoughts. Sometimes, when I walk around I think: “I feel the Love of God within me now” and I feel a certain level of joy.   
 

In regards to negative emotions, I find that stoping the thoughts that created that emotion and then observing that negative emotion is the key to healing it. Although for a moment it feels bad because you have to put your attention on it.
 
Our attention, if it is non-judgemental, pure awareness, has a healing property inherent in it.   
 

Then, perhaps it’s wise to look at what caused that emotion, what do you believe so that you feel that way? I think feelings are a good guiding star as to whether what we believe is true or not.  
 

As an example - some non-dual teachings propose the idea of no free will. I believed it and it felt bad. Then I investigated that belief, found it not true, changed it and felt better.  
 

On a more human-to-human interraction level:

I play video games and sometimes people insult me, so I simply observe the emotion that arises from that insult and it dissolves in a few moments.
 

The key is to overlook the error they have made in perceiving you and to be firm in your conviction that how they perceive you has nothing to do with you, they are more than likely simply projecting their own self-hatred onto you, as it reduces it a little bit in their mind, but also recycles it and keeps them stuck in a cycle of hatred.  
 

It’s the “Forgive them Father for they know not what they do” teaching.
 

Or I can argue and hold onto that insult, attack them and then negative emotions grow. Not the optimal choice. 😁 I used to say you’re projecting bro, but that also enflames them, so the best thing to do is definately to quetly overlook the error, remain present, and remove yourself from the situation if possible. 
 

hope it helps 🙏

[Salvijus]

13 hours ago, CoolDreamThanks said:

2-month solo-retreat 

Impressive. 

13 hours ago, CoolDreamThanks said:

Visions of Saint Marry too.  

Interesting. I had a dream of Marry few days ago aswell. 

[HMD]

@CoolDreamThanks What do you mean by idols?

 

[Ulax]

@CoolDreamThanks What technique(s) did you use on the retreat? Also, what was your schedule?

[CoolDreamThanks]

9 hours ago, HMD said:

@CoolDreamThanks What do you mean by idols?

 

You know when people have sex and say oh my god, oh my god? That’s an idol. We make whatever gives us pleasure into our personal god.  
 

In general, an idol is everything that we desire and value in this dream.  It’s an idol because it mesmerizes us and keeps us away from that inner place of stillness where the true God dwells.  
 

Letting go of all idols is a long process, probably life-long. But when we do, we then make a place for true God to re-awaken. 

Edited September 26 by CoolDreamThanks

[CoolDreamThanks]

10 minutes ago, Ulax said:

@CoolDreamThanks What technique(s) did you use on the retreat? Also, what was your schedule?

Just silence, staying present or whatever other term you want to use for that inner place of non-judgemental, abstract awareness.  
 

My schedule was meditating all day long whilst sitting, walking, eating, showering.  If I woke up at night I would sit down and meditate too. No specific hours or anything.
 

The idea was to let go of all idols for a period, so no internet, no talking, no thinking about spiritual concepts, etc. I did work for 2-4 hours per week but that’s it. 

[Ulax]

1 hour ago, CoolDreamThanks said:

Just silence, staying present or whatever other term you want to use for that inner place of non-judgemental, abstract awareness.  
 

My schedule was meditating all day long whilst sitting, walking, eating, showering.  If I woke up at night I would sit down and meditate too. No specific hours or anything.
 

The idea was to let go of all idols for a period, so no internet, no talking, no thinking about spiritual concepts, etc. I did work for 2-4 hours per week but that’s it. 

So like if a thought comes up you might observe it for a few seconds. Then switch to say watching the window in the room, and then switch to something else. And so on and so on?