Manuel's Journal - Spiritual Wok / Emotional Healing / Financial Freedom & more

[manuel bon]

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Introduction to Focus 10

21/09/2024      17:11                                    DAY 6

Yesterday I skipped the practice. I was emotionally and physically tired, I was really not in the mood. I had time to do it, but I preferred taking a nap instead. 

Today though I didn't skip the practice. I re-did the second tape of the first Wave, and it was great. It was for sure the best experience I've had with this tape. I kept my mind super focused on the sounds and voice of the audio, and even though sometimes I lost focus, I almost immediately put my attention back to the audio.

The experience was great, I clearly felt what the audio said that I would feel: my mind sharp and awake, and my body relaxed and asleep. I Imagine this state can go even deeper since there are three or four more tapes for this specific state, called Focus 10.

I am confident and happy to say that tomorrow (or even today) I will continue with the third track!

[manuel bon]

🟣 Online Course: Beginning of a Journey

 

I am not sure what I want to do with my life. But what I know for sure is that I want to help people somehow, and meditation has helped me a lot in the most difficult moments; so one idea would be teaching and guiding meditation and breathworks. I am 23, and still a student (just started a Master in the Conservatory - classical guitar), so I want to start with some basic groundwork.

The plan is to share free videos, exercises, and info on Instagram and YouTube about those topics. I will already create videos for an online course that I will publish on my website, and all of this will also be part of my master's project, if possible.

I watched a great video about how to make an online course, I found it really valuable.

[manuel bon]

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Advanced Focus 10

21/09/2024      23:50                                    DAY 6 part 2

 

I just ended the third tape. This was somehow more intense, but still, I know I can get greater levels of relaxation. I felt again that tension behind my knees, so that was not nice. Tomorrow I will re-do it at least twice!

[manuel bon]

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Advanced Focus 10

 

22/09/2024 17:50                   DAY 7

 

Today I did again the third tape. If was great until a certain moment I fell asleep. I made sure I would not fully lie, but that I would be kind of sitting comfortably, but I did sleep. I was listening intensely so I would not lose anything the guy was talking about, but then I woke up before the end, and I didn't realize I slept until I understood that it was the end. My body was comfortable and I didn't have any pain or discomfort, no saliva or other things that would disturb me. But yeah I slept, so this session doesn't count. I will redo it today or tomorrow.

[manuel bon]

 🔴 Finally meeting my girlfriend

 

Tomorrow I have a flight to Brussels Charleroi at 10am. I am going back to the Netherlands, and finally I will se my girlfriend again. I've been staying in Italy since June, so for almost 4 months, and during this period we met 2 times. Once she came to Italy, an the other time I went to Spain where she lives. We shared great moments, and I am grateful that I will see her again tomorrow. I am subrenting my room until next Friday, so I will stay at her's until then, and I'm so happy we can share these days together.

I can't wait to be again in her arms, and have her between mine, and cuddle all night.

[manuel bon]

⚫ Gratefulness Journal

 

Here's where I started my gratefulness journal, if you want to check it out.

 

 

[manuel bon]

🟤 Video about brain trauma

 

Great quote from the woman:

"Live life deeply, enjoy the things that you have and don't be jealous of what you don't have."

She's a really interesting and smart journalist, I would say a mixture of stage blue, orange and green of SD.

 

 

 

Edited September 22 by manuel bon

[manuel bon]

🟠 Emotions 

 

I'm feeling a little bit nervous. Tomorrow I'm going back to the Netherlands, probably this is what is making me feel kinda anxious. It's probably difficult to leave my family, even though sometimes I feel it's a tough environment, and I don't want to accept the fact that it's still difficult to go away. But I'll get used to it again, and I'll go back to Italy in a bit more than a month. 

In this case I don't know what to do. I am feeling these emotions which I fully recognize that come from an overthinking mind, and when I put myself in the present moment I feel that it's not right. I know it's still the mind reminding me that I should think, but to another extent I don't want that like this I avoid or hide those emotions from myself (and therefore accumulate more unprocessed emotions).

The truth is that I don't know how to fully experience the emotions (so then I can let them go) without thinking, but simply by feeling. Cause on the moment I try to do that I just can't, not because it's difficult, but because the emotion kind of fades away. Idk it's just weird. 

When I will be alone in the Netherlands I will work on that properly!

[manuel bon]

🟣 Email Newsletter: beginning 

 

I want to start an email newsletter. I still have to think about it more in depth, but that's my plan. 

The following video motivated me to do it:

 

In the future I will post more about it. 

[manuel bon]

⚫ Business beginning 

 

Currently travelling in the train towards Maastricht, the Netherlands. I'm listening to Leo's episode on SD stage orange. Last year I studied almost all the stages, but now that I'm getting closer to what they call "being an adult", I want to actually start with business ideas, grow economically so I can move to the next stages. 

I am deeply interested in spirituality, metaphysics, in general green or higher ideals, but I recognize that I have to reach financial freedom to really be able to live for spiritual growth, and even though I don't like to be a stage orange person, I feel that I still have to fulfill that need of making money, and making a business. Still, I want to make a conscious business, something that has to do with meditation and breath work, that can help people.

 

I have already started planning ideas about it. In the next weeks I will work to make these ideas more concrete.

[manuel bon]

🟠 General health and emotions

 

Yesterday I was really happy to see my girlfriend again. It was so nice to feel each other's warmth and feelings. 

We didn't sleep great because we haven't slept together in a long time, and the bed is not super big, but still it was really nice to wake up together!

 

I have been feeling pretty tired lately, and I know that I travelled and haven't slept properly in some time now, but I decided to take some supplements. Today I bought magnesium and rhodiola. In the future I might start again with lion's mane mushroom and with microdosing. For not not, I need to settle more and better.

[manuel bon]

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Advanced Focus 10

23/09/2024 10:50          DAY 8

 

Yesterday I listened to the third tape two times.

It was not the best time, but also not the worst. It was not the best because I did it on the plane going to Brussels, but still I felt the good effects of it. My body was really relaxed, but of course, it could be better. 

Today I will do it later in the afternoon, and focus as much as I can, and try to get the best out of it!

Today will be the fourth day of doing the third tape, and if I do it properly tomorrow I might continue with the next one. Today I might do it even two times. Let's see!

Edited September 24 by manuel bon

[manuel bon]

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Advanced Focus 10

24/09/2024 18:36          DAY 9

 

I just finished the third tape again; it was great this time. I kind of leaned on the wall with a pillow on my lower back, I was comfortable, but the downside was that sometimes my head would start falling to one side. it happened only 2 times. At a certain moment towards the end I started feeling a strong tingling sensation on my whole head, shoulders, and upper chest, maybe if I had relaxed more I would have felt it in my whole body.

I might re-do it later; tomorrow I will definitely continue with the next one!

[manuel bon]

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Release and Recharge

25/09/2024 20:06          DAY 10

 

As said previously, today I continued with the fourth track. In the beginning, I thought I was not ready for it, and that's because I had to do alone all the exercises that previously were guided. And maybe I didn't do it the best way, but it was the first time, so I wasn't expecting something like that. Later I got into a profound state, I didn't understand what was happening. In a sense, it was psychedelic, but not with visuals; I mean that the body/mental felling was similar to when I take magic truffles. I might redo it soon. Today it was good!
 

[manuel bon]

🟠 How am I feeling?

 

I already said it some time ago, but I have been struggling with allergies for some weeks now. Also, I had to travel and work a lot, which made my immune system pretty weak. Now I don't feel good at all, I might have a fever, my nose is runny, and I have no energy.

Every time I am sick or don't feel good emotionally I stop meditating, writing my gratefulness journal, etc. I stop doing all the things that can help me, but this time I won't stop. I just ended a track of the Gateway Experience, which I will write about right now.

[manuel bon]

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Release and Recharge & Advanced Focus 10

27/09/2024 19:30          DAY 11 & 12

 

Yesterday the experiment was not great. I didn't focus enough, and I almost didn't go deep. I think I might not have been for the 4th track, or maybe I didn't get great results cause I was sick.

But today I redid the third tape, and even though I didn't manage to focus for the whole time fully, I managed to relax and have a good experience.

I think for the next few days I need to combine the 3rd and 4th tracks, so I can get the best results out of them.

Edited September 27 by manuel bon

[manuel bon]

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Release and Recharge

27/09/2024 20:20          DAY 12 part 2

 

Just finished the fourth track.

It was good, for the first time I followed everything and relaxed. I'm looking forward to doing these exercises when feeling better.

[manuel bon]

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Advanced Focus 10 & Release and Recharge

28/09/2024 17:30          DAY 13

 

So earlier in the morning, I did the third track, and now I just finished the fourth. I have to say that both went really really well, I am really satisfied. I still have a cold, so I can't fully breathe from my nose, and even though I had to breathe from the mouth and it therefore got pretty dry both times, I had a great experience. Especially with the second tape I managed to go really deep into a relaxed state and do all the things instructed. 

Tomorrow I will continue with the fifth tape; I will for sure redo the fourth, and I might do also the third one before the two, but I will see how the mood is.

[manuel bon]

🟢 Thoughts on MEDITATION

 

In the last few days, I haven't meditated. I stopped almost a week ago when I returned to the Netherlands. I know it's normal to lose the routine when big changes happen, but I still want to get back to it. 

Since I am also doing the Gateway experiment daily, I feel like I am meditating to some extent, but I don't want to confuse the two practices. I am happy that I implemented this new spiritual practice in my daily life, and now I want to start again meditating, so I can do two practices at a time. I feel that like this I can start making big progress in my path. 

Keeping this journal is helping me, I will keep it up, and try to grow as much as I can!

[manuel bon]

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Exploration Sleep

28/09/2024 23:50          DAY 13 part 2

 

I decided to go for the 5th track, and it was the deepest and the best experience so far.

I went really deep, at a certain moment I felt (or better, I thought) I would have an OBE. I got really scared, to be honest, and that would not help with my relaxation. I explored different and new levels of consciousness and deep relaxation, but I am not happy that I can't let go. I am scared to let go, I am too attached to my ego. I am even scared to fall asleep when I do exercises to fall asleep...

How can I do this track in the best way possible?

I will see in the next few days how it goes!