How to be non reactive ?

[NoSelfSelf]

8 minutes ago, Rishabh R said:

@NoSelfSelf why you are so rude all the time huh? 

Im being super nice right now, i dont know how you gonna grow if someone doesnt tell you honest truth...

[Sugarcoat]

@UnbornTao I’m surprised you didn’t tell him to “contemplate” 😂

[Rishabh R]

@NoSelfSelf I think that I am already growing as negative emotions are key to growth and the topic was how to develop non reactivity which means how to develop detachment . Sorry dude but maybe that's a part truth not whole truth of the matter.

[UnbornTao]

@NoSelfSelf @Rishabh R  yeah you could ask how can I best assist this person with his dilemma? 

@Rishabh R Basically, being non-reactive would require a fundamental shift in one's experience. Obviously, I'm not exclusively talking about dating and relationships, because this is a deeper dynamic.

Essentially, you could clarify what it is you want to ask. I'd guess it has to do with being okay with rejection, which is different from being non-reactive. 

Keep making progress. That you have talked with many girls is a positive sign already. Be willing to be rejected and that will decrease your fear of it, which in turn will allow you to be more relaxed and authentic.

[UnbornTao]

5 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

@UnbornTao I’m surprised you didn’t tell him to “contemplate” 😂

Hey, you are essentially telling him to contemplate, too. 

Edited September 16 by UnbornTao

[NoSelfSelf]

3 minutes ago, Rishabh R said:

@NoSelfSelf I think that I am already growing as negative emotions are key to growth and the topic was how to develop non reactivity which means how to develop detachment . Sorry dude but maybe that's a part truth not whole truth of the matter.

Thats like asking how can i lift 500kg and you can lift 30kg

Edited September 16 by NoSelfSelf

[Rishabh R]

@UnbornTao @Sugarcoat  I already started contemplating since 2021 and now a these days I have stopped as I have generated too many insights. And yes @UnbornTao some people are not gonna like me or accept me which is a fact of life as I learned this from Mark Manson's connection course. Thanks.

[Buck Edwards]

You can't practice complete detachment from others. But the first thing you can do is not seek someone's validation. You don't need man or woman to make you feel accepted. Have you accepted your own self? That's the key question. If you truly have, then you wouldn't need to worry about what other girls think or how they respond to you. Just my 2 cents. 

 

[Sugarcoat]

4 minutes ago, UnbornTao said:

Hey, you are essentially telling him to contemplate, too. 

That’s right now that u say it

[Sugarcoat]

2 minutes ago, Rishabh R said:

I have stopped as I have generated too many insights

Lmao what😂😂 

Edited September 16 by Sugarcoat

[Rishabh R]

@Buck Edwards maybe you are talking about self acceptance of negative emotions which feels after rejection/,heartbreaker, right ?

[Princess Arabia]

What's up with this thread. You're back to being sad again? 

[Princess Arabia]

Are you a teenager?

[Rishabh R]

Just now, Sugarcoat said:

Lmao what😂😂 maybe it’s true but it made me laugh for some reason 

😂Haha , I can share the insights too as I have more than 150 insights on - What is the most wisest way to live life ?

[Sugarcoat]

Just now, Rishabh R said:

😂Haha , I can share the insights too as I have more than 150 insights on - What is the most wisest way to live life ?

You could start a thread if you want

[Rishabh R]

2 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

What's up with this thread. You're back to being sad again? 

No I am not sad but yesterday I felt angry , sad a mixture of it but now I am feeling normal. No I am not teenager , I am 23 years old. That post was for feeling sadness for continuous 2 days, now again emotional distress has come but I am practicing acceptance via shadow work.

Edited September 16 by Rishabh R

[Buck Edwards]

Just now, Rishabh R said:

@Buck Edwards maybe you are talking about self acceptance of negative emotions which feels after rejection/,heartbreaker, right ?

No. You have to feel all the time. You need self acceptance right from the get go. This needs building your self confidence. Then you won't feel bothered by how others treat you. It's not about the girls. It's about you. 

[Rishabh R]

@Sugarcoat I am not sure as it is written in my diary with pen and I don't think people will understand my handwriting 😂.

[Sugarcoat]

1 minute ago, Rishabh R said:

@Sugarcoat I am not sure as it is written in my diary with pen and I don't think people will understand my handwriting 😂.

🤷🏻‍♀️ it’s up to you

[Rishabh R]

1 minute ago, Buck Edwards said:

No. You have to feel all the time. You need self acceptance right from the get go. This needs building your self confidence. Then you won't feel bothered by how others treat you. It's not about the girls. It's about you. 

Yeah I recognise that I am responsible for this problem but girls also play a part into it , which is not to say that I must blame girls which is precisely what my mind is doing , just separation of responsibility must take place in which I take responsibility for my actions , thoughts and emotions.