Women are my only and only distraction from Enlightment

[Nemra]

7 hours ago, Davino said:

Then you don't love Truth 

You love the truth that you can bear 

Well, you can't know if you can bear something if you aren't aware of it.

I bet there are many things that you won't be able to bear in real life.

You can't know if you love some truth if you aren't aware of it yet, even if you say you love truth.

[Leo Gura]

@Emerald Much wisdom has grown in You. Like a tree bearing ripe fruit.

Edited September 8 by Leo Gura

[Applegarden8]

Don't judge your situation. Accept where you are in life. There is no standard to compare. Your life is unique, yet you can make yourself more competent. Just do some general spiritual practice daily and go meet some women, if you really want to, just recognize it. You can't prevent suffering from happening in your life, but you still can get better at releasing it and not even accumulating it at times.

I think what makes you thinking of that so persistent is all the guilts of you accumulate of feeling guilty for who you are and you can certainly feel guilty for the rest of your life when it comes to relationships with the opposite sex.

Let's say you either got in relationship it or didn't get into relationship. You will feel guilty about the opposite you didn't choose at times.

You can have desire for a woman and yet desire for the truth. If you practice some form of meditation or something you are on that path anyway. What is there to feel guilty of? Reflect and see that it's nonsense. Go and enjoy your life. If some shit will happen, just use it as a fuel to transform yourself. Maybe you will have a beautiful family. Who knows.

People are so afraid to take new births and enjoy their unfulfilled desires because we don't know how to live properly.

Edited September 8 by Applegarden8

[Brittany]

11 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

@Brittany Ok, fair enough.

I think I have complete clarity now. I am officially stopping seeking for life. I´ll just stick to 15 minute sadhana in the morning and just live life.

Clearly if while Im alive I can not Realize (Total Enlighment), death will do it for me when time comes.

Your thoughts are often what will manifest.

So if you have thoughts like "I will never become enlightened", that is what you are speaking into existence. And because of these thoughts, you will begin to make choices that reflect "I will never become enlightened". And it will be a self fulfilling prophecy.

Repeating over and over again "I will never become enlightened in this lifetime" will become a self fulfilling prophecy.

But there is often moments of "grace" and "glimpses" that happen...sometimes where a family member dies, you get an injury, a divorce, lose your job, deal with old age etc. that can produce so much disorientation to the psyche that it will break you open into surrender.

10 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Yeah, but were they married/kids before or after their enlightenments?

I didn't pay enough attention to remember and some I just googled. haha

But I feel like there is no correlation.

Marriage/kids will make enlightenment harder and you will become more distracted. But this is the same with things like being in extreme poverty, having a chronic illness that medication cannot fully numb, PTSD/trauma/mental illness, living in a war zone, being oppressed by authority figures, etc.

I think the "well, I am a parent, so I can't be enlightened" argument is an excuse people use because they don't have a FIRE for truth.

If you have a FIRE for truth, nothing is going to stop you. Nothing can stand in the way of the fire, when it is there.

I just think we need to push back against "Well, I am in a romantic relationship and have kids so I can't become enlightened", because I think it's a cop out and excuse for people who don't care about truth.

And....there are plenty of people who are single and who are very unconscious. So what is their excuse? haha Many people who are single, don't care about the truth either. 

So I think realization is more about the FIRE for truth...than if you are single, married/partnered, have kids/etc.. If you have the FIRE, then your relationship status doesn't really matter.

[Miguel1]

1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

Much wisdom has grown in You. Like a tree bearing ripe fruit.

Leo spreading much love around the forum.

Namaste 😊

[Leo Gura]

30 minutes ago, Brittany said:

I think the "well, I am a parent, so I can't be enlightened" argument is an excuse

I have not seen anyone making that claim.

[Keryo Koffa]

@Emerald I've read through and deeply appreciate your answers, they're rare insights on this forum.

Some think we have a "100% self-dissolution solipsist expansion policy" and dismiss all else as delusion.

And any outliers, including puporing, get the backlash's broadside, esp. from those who struggle to transcend.

I'm fairly interested to hear more about the dynamics of the contraction polarity, and how it mixes with expansion. 

[Brittany]

51 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

I have not seen anyone making that claim.

I may have oversimplified. haha

I just see a trend of people throwing the towel in because they want to experience a romantic relationship (and the fruits of one). And they don't need to do that.

[Leo Gura]

Most guys here would love to find a girlfriend but struggle to make it happen.

And the journey to develop that skillset is very time-consuming, distracting, and unspiritual. That's what this whole thread is about.

Edited September 8 by Leo Gura

[Davino]

7 hours ago, LambdaDelta said:

Quite well so far. Guess I'm like that monk Leo mentioned 

Surely, I can see how that life could work quite well for me also.

Maybe even better for many things. I just wanna give an honest shot to making a relationship a work. I feel it can be a very meaningful endeavour and way of life.

[Davino]

2 hours ago, Nemra said:

Well, you can't know if you can bear something if you aren't aware of it.

I bet there are many things that you won't be able to bear in real life.

You can't know if you love some truth if you aren't aware of it yet, even if you say you love truth.

I agree 

It takes a quite rare beast to love truth more than sanity, confort or pain. There's some "broken" humans in the good way around here. 

I salute you

[Davino]

@Emerald Thanks for sharing. I've always wondered how highly conscious femenine Spirituality would look like. I recognise deeply the role that my humanity makes in the large scope of my living time, as a matter of fact I know that no transcendence is possible without a holistic embrace of my life as limited form. 

There's a lot to do in the embodied realms of existence, which can be tremendously divine and natural. Although I wound invite you to consider why this is an "or" "or" situation instead of an "and" "and" situation.

I've always had this crazy idea that you can do everything in life. It goes in pendulum and now maybe you are in the phase of profound presence and playing God's Game but that doesn't close the door to Infinite Awakenings, Infinite Truth, Infinite Love, Infinite Consciousness, Infinite Perfection, Infinite Self-Understanding, Infinite God...

So make me understand why it has been the case for you that playing the game has become the new spiritual meaning? And why you've decided to close the trascendental door?

[gettoefl]

@emerald do you have children or a partner might i ask if it's not too intrusive

[Someone here]

@Javfly33 sex is the most overrated thing ever . Like you just cum and experience 9 seconds of a tingly sensation. 

Now what ?!

Nothing.

But maybe you have to  burn through that sexual karma . I know it's difficult to see through sex's trap because the tingles are so good. But you gotta get over it . Like I said either hire some escorts or over-masturbate and see for yourself the futility. 

[Clarence]

1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

And the journey to develop that skillset is very time-consuming, distracting, and unspiritual.

Not just the journey, but also being in a relationship itself is distracting and time-consuming. It makes me question how worth it it is to have a partner, especially as there are pretty much no chance to meet someone with the same passion for psychedelics and Awakening.

I hope I'm wrong, but so far, I've not even met a single person around me who even knew about Actualized.org or 5-MeO-DMT. So I have very little hope to meet such a person some day. They would, on top of that, need to be a good match on a relationship level to be relevant.

If you can't share your deepest trips with your partner, and feel understood, and also listen to their own Awakenings… what's the point of the relationship. There is so much disappontment for me not to be able to connect on this level with a partner. That is what I desire most out of a relationship.

Everything else to me seems irrelevant, but at the same time, I'd crave to share those things with someone.

Am I wrong to be so defeatist… I don't know, but I don't think so. Even on the forum, it is so rare to read members who are positive on psychedelics, God-Realization and Alien Consciousness. How impossible it would be to meet such a person in my country to build a relationship with.

@Leo Gura I hope you could tell me to stay positive and have hope that such a person exists. It's hard to do the search if you don't believe it will ever be possible to find what you desire.

I really don't know what else I could want out of a relationship. Nothing else really matters if my partner can't understand the depth of who I am and of who they are.

[Keryo Koffa]

@Davino Transcend and include, it's both expansion, omnidirectional, the path for you to decide 😁

[Brittany]

2 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Most guys here would love to find a girlfriend but struggle to make it happen.

And the journey to develop that skillset is very time-consuming, distracting, and unspiritual. That's what this whole thread is about.

I understand.

A man who is peaceful, blissful, is full inside, loves himself, feels one with everything around him, sees the divinity in everyone, etc. that is pursuing a girlfriend:

His journey won't feel like he is "gaining" something. He already feels complete, so there is nothing to gain.  It will just be another part of God to experience. He is dancing with divinity. She cannot make him "more" of anything. He identifies as nothing and isn't adding anything to his identity or self concept.

But a man who is neurotic, feels empty inside, doesn't like himself, is filled with judgements and comparisons, sees only separation, doesn't see the divinity in everyone, etc. that is pursuing a girlfriend:

His journey will feel like he is "gaining" or adding something to himself, increasing in some way, finally feeling complete. It won't be a dance of consciousness. But of gaining something to fill a hole. Becoming something. Something that is being added to his identity or self concept.

This forum is filled with men in the latter category. And that journey doesn't feel as good, and so dating is a terrible experience for them.

Edited September 8 by Brittany

[Ishanga]

13 minutes ago, Brittany said:

I understand.

A man who is peaceful, blissful, is full inside, loves himself, feels one with everything around him, sees the divinity in everyone, etc. that is pursuing a girlfriend:

His journey won't feel like he is "gaining" something. He already feels complete, so there is nothing to gain.  It will just be another part of God to experience. He is dancing with divinity. She cannot make him "more" of anything. He identifies as nothing and isn't adding anything to his identity or self concept.

But a man who is neurotic, feels empty inside, doesn't like himself, is filled with judgements and comparisons, sees only separation, doesn't see the divinity in everyone, etc. that is pursuing a girlfriend:

His journey will feel like he is "gaining" or adding something to himself, increasing in some way, finally feeling complete. It won't be a dance of consciousness. But of gaining something to fill a hole. Becoming something. Something that is being added to his identity or self concept.

This forum is filled with men in the latter category. And that journey doesn't feel as good, and so dating is a terrible experience for them.

Good Post and so True... A True Relationship has nothing to do with an Exchange of anything, its all about Sharing, Giving, and it only works when as You say above, when one is Blissful and Complete within themselves, anything under this sort of internal experience the relationship will end up as a contract, an exchange, an agreement that says "If You do this I promise to be with You and give You this or that", that is not Love or a real Relationship in anyways, but unfortunately this is the majority of what is happening in the world today on many levels!

Edited September 8 by Ishanga

[Keryo Koffa]

30 minutes ago, Brittany said:

I understand.

A man who is peaceful, blissful, is full inside, loves himself, feels one with everything around him, sees the divinity in everyone, etc. that is pursuing a girlfriend:

His journey won't feel like he is "gaining" something. He already feels complete, so there is nothing to gain.  It will just be another part of God to experience. He is dancing with divinity. She cannot make him "more" of anything. He identifies as nothing and isn't adding anything to his identity or self concept.

But a man who is neurotic, feels empty inside, doesn't like himself, is filled with judgements and comparisons, sees only separation, doesn't see the divinity in everyone, etc. that is pursuing a girlfriend:

His journey will feel like he is "gaining" or adding something to himself, increasing in some way, finally feeling complete. It won't be a dance of consciousness. But of gaining something to fill a hole. Becoming something. Something that is being added to his identity or self concept.

This forum is filled with men in the latter category. And that journey doesn't feel as good, and so dating is a terrible experience for them.

 

@Brittany It's funny: People's "romanticized" views on "love" are basically, to put it crudely:

Outsourcing personal emotional labor to others by turning them into lifelong slaves
Ranting, complaining, attaching, and polluting their lives with one's own problems
And then expecting absolute loyalty "because" of ridiculous emotional immaturity

But the funniest part is: When you tell them to work on themselves to be less shitty of a partner
They go *hurr durr* what's the point of a relationship if the other person isn't my little b*tch
"What's the point of a relationship if I'm fine?" After all, the point was to turn them into duct-tape
"What's the point" "if they don't fix any problems" "why keep them around" "why even bother"?

It's so toxic... they literally admit the point was to make the other one's punching bag
Just to manipulate them into serving as one's breathing tube because one is too lazy

And justify it all through some pretty pictures, weddngs and societal aesthetics to cover it up

[LambdaDelta]

13 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

I am Truth.

Said the Sufi Mansur Al-Hallaj and was promptly executed for heresy. How lucky we are to live in the the modern times, even if it's still the dark ages in many ways 

 

3 hours ago, Davino said:

It takes a quite rare beast to love truth more than sanity, confort or pain. There's some "broken" humans in the good way around here. 

Thankfully Truth is a much larger notion, containing all of those and then some, so you "only" need to break your perception insofar as to seize separating everything in your mind, just leave a tiny space for survival 

 

1 hour ago, Keryo Koffa said:

@Davino Transcend and include, it's both expansion, omnidirectional, the path for you to decide 😁

Basically how ego death works, you contract to zero which expands you to infinity