Journey to Self Actualisation

[UpperMaster]

You're a slave if you can't think or verify things for yourself. When you rely on others' ideas without confirmation, your perception of reality might seem logical to you, but it's built on assumptions passed on by other, assumptions you've never questioned.

Edited October 21 by UpperMaster

[UpperMaster]

I want to move out of from my families house. I just had a fight with my mother and realised that it’s not worth staying here. 
 

not because I have bad parents. I have amazing parents, they’ve done so much for me. They are very very high quality. But I realise that staying here has been an impediment to my growth. 
 

I want to use my own wings to fly, not rely on my parents. I feel as if my life isn’t mine. I feel as if I am not living life the way I should.

 

maybe this is just a temporary feeling. But I doubt that, as this is more of a realization then it is a feeling.
 

 

I amm not living my life to the fullest because I live with my parents. I am using the fact that I am living with my parents as a safety net which allows me to live mediocrely. 
 

that much is clear 

[UpperMaster]

Realising the inportance of creativity in the day to day. Super underrated 

[UpperMaster]

On 10/21/2024 at 6:11 AM, UpperMaster said:

Major Major Major life decision: Strict Information Diet. I won't watch Actualized.org for a while. 

I was thinking about the importance of thinking for yourself and being your own authority. I realized how important it is to confirm things for yourself and not take other peoples word for it. I can't talk for other people, but I certainly realized for myself that I personally believe pretty much 99.999 percent of things because of here say from other people rather than my own real life experiences. I found this extremely disturbing, because to me, getting answers online, from a book and even people adulterates your understanding of something. When someone gives you an answer, not only do you not know if the answer is even valid, but also you don't understand the context to which the advice is given. Context changes everything. You can take the advice of "Never give up" for example. It is great in some contexts, but in other contexts in life I can see how giving up an ideal can help you lead a better life. Additionally, I feel like a slave to the media around me.

I dislike how I am going about learning the material in actualized.org. I feel as though I am not thinking through each of the points like Leo has. I also realized that I started thinking of Leo an an authority figure. He says not to do this, and that's the advice I'm seriously going to take from now on. 

I am no longer going to consume books, YouTube videos, TikTok, Instagram. I am not gonna read advice from reddit. 

If I have a problem in my life, I will either 

1. Ask someone I know 

2. Read Scientific Studies (I'll find studies on google)

3. Contemplate for myself

 

I am not sure if I should still listen to music, because a lot of music I listen to contains perspectives that may or may not represent truth entirely. The whole point of this experiment, is to streamline my truth finding process. I will do things on my own, I will learn to think. Hold myself as the authority, develop opinions other people may not even have because Im thinking on my own. I want that confidence. 

After I do that, I will approach Leo's work again as well as other peoples perspectives. 

I will post here of course because I think it's great to journal this chapter of my process. 

The drawbacks of doing something like this are 

1. Takes longer to come up with solutions 

2. Might not benefit from other peoples solutions to problems

 

These are drawbacks, that I think are fine. its the price to pay for independent thought and self authority. 

 

 

 

This rant was slightly overblown. I didn't stick with it. I addicted to social media. I'll just be more wary about what I watch. I definitely will try thinking on my own more.

 

I defenitly try now to think by myself. I don't really search for advice on line as much as I think for myself. I think that's really helpful. I just wanted to say that I didn't quit social media col turkey like how I may have implied.

Edited October 24 by UpperMaster

[UpperMaster]

I'm going to try to enjoy stage orange. Related to the last post, Im watching a lot of stage orange content, and I think it's helping me tremendously with becoming more productive and optimizing for success. So cool and weird to see how the content you consume can change your life.

Edited October 24 by UpperMaster

[UpperMaster]

I change my mind orange creators I kinda retarded, everyone except maybe Alex Hormozi.

[UpperMaster]

For a moment I went back to the mental mode of "following internet gurus online" but now I realize that this might be the sole reason for why I haven't been progressing. 

Taking yourself as an authority is proving to be more and more important. 

[UpperMaster]

I’m my own authority figure, I’m thinking through everything, I’m not gonna believe everyone just like that, it’s just heresay. 

[UpperMaster]

I’m thinking maybe the whole you should “process your emotions” is just dogma. I ate it up, and now I seem to be hyper emotional. 
 

it might not be dogma, but I definitely took it in as dogma. 

[UpperMaster]

I think I am over emotional and have to develop the more heartless part of myself so to speak. 

[UpperMaster]

If your reading this actually maybe give me your opinion.

how can you progress in life if your busy processing every emotion. 
 

to be successful I realise you just gotta suck it up, do the work, cast out the unnecessary emotions involved.

otherwise you can’t move forward. I mean try processing every emotion. You’ll just be stuck. 

[UpperMaster]

I think I have to become more ruthless in general. More ruthless with my time, more ruthless with people. I am the opposite right now and it's costing me success in life. This is all speculation, but I think its true.

[UpperMaster]

I want to be an integrated man. 

Edited October 27 by UpperMaster

[UpperMaster]

I keep trying to look for answers outside me. I am starting to stop this habit, and am looking more inward. I really think this is a positive change.

[UpperMaster]

Instead of asking whether or not I can do something, maybe I should ask what is the best decision I can make. And just focus on doing that. 

[UpperMaster]

I started meditating in efforts to try to fix my ADHD. After a meditation session today, I had a few moments of more presence. I realize that Im so unpresent naturally and I am emotionally too volatile. I'm in my head too much and am going crazy slightly. Im not grounded at all.

[UpperMaster]

I see self-improvement as having two modes: enhancing the quality of how you enjoy what you already do or working to change external circumstances. I've been focused on the latter, but maybe shifting to the former would be more beneficial for me.

[UpperMaster]

I need to get some ass asap, I can’t think of nothing else shshshs fuck

Edited October 29 by UpperMaster

[UpperMaster]

My mom gave me a speech about how I keep self doubting myself and that’s why I’m unsuccessful. She gave me such a speech before but this one hit different.

 

Additionally I feel like I need to ground my life on a goal. I have to make a decision. What will I focus on, and just focus on that. Is it dating. Business. Philosophy. There’s drawbacks to not pursuing any one of them but I must decide and stick with it. 

[UpperMaster]

I also got in contact with my university therapist. Maybe it will help me with some of the struggles I face in life.