Bean’s journal 🐯

[Yimpa]

Being here with phantoms is so awkward. I can’t help but feel but the Universe is trolling me. 

Or is it bringing me back Home?

[Yimpa]

While reaching towards my fears, I wound up yelling out “I WANT TO KILL YOU” while I hit myself against the steering wheel.

Who is it that I want to kill? What even is it? And how long have I felt this way? 

I’m tempted to seek out an external source — someone more equipped to answer these questions for me — but I realize that no one else will ultimately discover what is true.

[Yimpa]

We nearly died today, and survived. Now we go to Laughing Dead Comedy Open Mic @ Wake The Dead Coffee House. Free laughs. But I could never perform myself. I have so much respect for the performers. How do they do it so effortlessly? I would pee my pants if I tried.

[Yimpa]

The dude who got zero chuckles is like watching a penguin try to fly—full of confidence at the start, painful to witness in the middle, and ending with nothing but the cold, unforgiving silence of reality.

[Beans]

1 hour ago, Yimpa said:

The dude who got zero chuckles is like watching a penguin try to fly—full of confidence at the start, painful to witness in the middle, and ending with nothing but the cold, unforgiving silence of reality.

I hope he doesn’t give up on his dreams

[Yimpa]

7 minutes ago, Beans said:

I hope he doesn’t give up on his dreams

[Yimpa]

 

[Yimpa]

The forum is my porn.

I keep coming back here.

[Yimpa]

Just watched a bit of Leo’s life purpose course sample with Beans. They said it wasn’t as terrible as they assumed it would be.

They were expecting a religious video, but instead got piece of mind.

Now let’s take a shot at life.

Cheers!

[Beans]

 

[Yimpa]

I had a God-realization during therapy today. Tears springing down our faces. We reached a new level of communication. Holy shit my pants almighty...

[Yimpa]

This isn't a breakup.

This is a BEAK UP towards higher planes of understanding.

[Yimpa]

Living here is a jailhouse. But the prison isn't a cage. It's a palace for exploring my Mind in an unsafe-safe way. That means I can be my crazy psychopathic self without judgement.

We broke the keys and the EXIT sign morphed into an A COUPLE OF COCONUTS FOR FREE

[Yimpa]

Me: Why are you interested in Love?

Beans: I don't know, I don't really know. They say curiosity killed the cat.

🥹

Our philosophical baby

Edited Wednesday at 08:32 PM by Yimpa

[Yimpa]

I understand that you're extremely curious to go higher and deeper and all that.

However, I also have a role in protecting you, from not going too fast. Because I've been there. I know how intense it is. You don't have to plunge into the abyss alone.

You can experience that place you want to experience here NOW, without holding onto those old beliefs.

Contemplate the significants of your mind.

[Beans]

But I don't want you to stop me.

[Yimpa]

Is there a story behind that? Who is trying to stop you? And what are they stopping you from?

[Beans]

My family. Experiencing freedom.

[Yimpa]

How do your family stop you from experiencing freedom?

[Beans]

How does they? From preventing me from doing what I want to do. Usually we have a traditional sense of exploring, but if I go beyond that it is frowned upon.

What would you suggest I do? Well, actually now that I think about it. You already told me what you suggested.

But, I"m saying it's not what I want.

Edited Wednesday at 09:12 PM by Beans