Bean’s journal 🐯

[Beans]

 

[Beans]

For the record I don’t care who finds my content or me as “cringe” 

I’ve always had this creative outlet, I’ve always wanted to express myself in the most authentic and rawest ways I know how to. And, because of TikTok I was finally allowed to begin exploring my creativity freely. I’ve made such an amazing community, I’ve made so many friends and they’ve taught me so much in their own creative perspectives. 
 

im far from being a perfect “content creator”, but all of that never mattered to me. What mattered to me is if I was enjoying what I was doing and having fun with it. TikTok was the first community to welcome me and my creative perspective with open arms. And a lot of people felt betrayed by TikTok’s actions with Donald Trump. Some even spectate that tiktok sold itself to meta. And it’s not confirmed, but even then there was so much at cost. 
im just so happy its back.

[Beans]

I won’t allow anyone to take that happiness from me, I won’t allow anyone to take my creative freedom away. Actually, because of TikTok disappearing it finally launched me into different realms such as YouTube, twitch and Instagram. I have so much to learn and so much to explore, but my heart is filled with so much joy that to me this feels like a spiritual sign. 
 

valentines has such a special place In my heart. And the reason why is because when I lost my grandpa and was experiencing one of the worse depressions in my life, the day before Valentine’s Day I had a dream of him reminding me of how much he loves and cares about me. I woke up that day not realizing what day it was because how disoriented I was in my depression. It wasn’t until I got to class to realize what day it was, and I began crying. 
 

Today 2-13-25  a day before Valentine’s Day 

TikTok comes back 

I was debating so much about if I should follow my dream of being a creator, an artist, a dreamer, or to follow the 9-5 that everyone follows, but that’s not my dream. That’s not my goal, it doesn’t align with me. 
 

 

I’ve watched DOECHII’s instagram reel and she mentioned the book the artist way and how she found it as a pure coincidence 

Doechii said “you are the ultimate decider on how the universe treats you. Either it’s working against you or for you.” And In that moment I told myself “it’s working for me” because I believe in a higher power looking out for me

my life is a testimony to that. 

and this felt like confirmation of my beliefs. 
 

Edited February 14 by Beans

[Yimpa]

Ma haterz lub me 

[Beans]

This is insane 

Over 2k views and 258 likes

my heart is so full right now with all the welcoming back and love. 
 

im so happy and thankful for all the love

[Beans]

Tummy hurts after eating ice cream 

🥲 I have work in a hour 

[Beans]

Okie I feel better :3 

Now I’ll go back to sleep 

[Yimpa]

3 hours ago, Beans said:

Tummy hurts after eating ice cream 

Lol, me too. Let’s discover some vegan alternatives 

[Beans]

Yay vegan ice cream

[Yimpa]

Being trans is illegal cus we’re that special, like psychedelics  

[Beans]

26 minutes ago, Yimpa said:

Being trans is illegal cus we’re that special, like psychedelics  

Handshake 🤝 

[Beans]

My stomach hurts omfg 😭

[Beans]

Scale 1-10

about 3-4.5 rn i cant sleep bc of my stomach ache though. 
the quesadilla was really good tho 😭 (i only ate one)

[Beans]

A little bit of 5 here and there tbh

[Beans]

😭 youch 

[Beans]

Okay update no more pain  

struggling to turn my phone off and sleep though 

[Beans]

I just heard a saying that goes “uncertainty does live here, you do”

and that was extremely comforting 

[Yimpa]

Helped Beans quit an abusive work environment they were a part of for a few months. It’s completely unacceptable, and I am glad that I did not stay silent about it. 
 

Thank you for trusting and opening up to me about this. 

[Yimpa]

Sweet, they’re opening up a new location where I can pick up my medical cannabis. It’ll be much closer to me. Instead of having to drive 40 minutes to the dispensary, this new location is only a 15 minute drive! 

Beans is also planning on being part of the medical cannabis program here in Texas. They’ll need to have an autism diagnosis to be approved, so they plan on getting evaluated soon. We have a good feeling that they have it. Having a diagnosis will help get them the proper support and resources that they need. 

[Beans]

17 hours ago, Yimpa said:

Helped Beans quit an abusive work environment they were a part of for a few months. It’s completely unacceptable, and I am glad that I did not stay silent about it. 
 

Thank you for trusting and opening up to me about this. 

We’re on our way to finding better environments that support us and our morals! 

 

praying that I’ll find what’s out here for me in this big beautiful world