My ego death experience

[Spiritual Warrior]

I experienced ego death while I was on shrooms a week ago and it was terrifying. I am posting this is as a point of reference and as a warning. If you use psychedelics recklessly, you could quite literally kill yourself. 

I took shrooms with four people, my gf and my friend and his gf. When the shrooms started to peak, I entered a dream like state in which I didn't know that I was a human being, I didn't know my own name, I didn't know what my job was, I didn't know that I had any sort of life outside of what I was experiencing right now. I didn't know who these four people were that I was with, I saw them as characters that's energy made me feel a certain way, but I had no idea who they were or how they got here. I could not comprehend how to pee. I didn't know anything, I was a blank slate, but my mind was not quiet, it was very messy with so many random and sometimes terrifying thoughts.

The scariest part of this experience was that it felt like the shrooms were trying to push me towards jumping off of this cliff and into the water, which would have been extremely dangerous. I would get closer and closer and closer, but I kept saying that I was too scared. The ocean to me in the moment was eternal love, but something inside me must have known that it was also death. If there weren't others to stop me, I might have summoned the courage to jump off because I didn't think that anything mattered, I was just this floating ball of consciousness with no past and no future and jumping into an ocean of eternal love sounded very appealing.

I did many embarrassing things during this trip which include trying to pull my girlfriends top off, barking, crying, trying to literally jump through the cars GPS screen, saying that I'd fuck my friends gf, and peeing my pants. ( I was fully conscious while peeing my pants, I just could not comprehend that it mattered.)

It was funny, I was FULLY immersed in this trip right up until I stepped out of my friend's car. As soon as I stepped out, the trip was over. I look down at my clothes and they are soaking wet with piss, my toe is bleeding, and I have one sandal on. The reality of what just transpired came crashing down on me all at once. My ego is back. 

Edited August 20 by Spiritual Warrior

[Javfly33]

Holy shit dude, how much did You take?

[Spiritual Warrior]

37 minutes ago, Javfly33 said:

Holy shit dude, how much did You take?

It wasn't even that much, it was a quarter split between 4 people. And everyone else's trip was calm, I was the only one bugging out. 

I think intention is big when taking psychedelics and with life in general. 

About a year ago, I made a goal for myself that I would have an enlightenment experience on August 18th, 2024. This ego death experience occurred on August 10th, 2024. This was the closest thing that I was able to manifest I guess; a very messy and terrifying taste of ego death. 

Edited August 20 by Spiritual Warrior

[Keryo Koffa]

@Spiritual Warrior Ah, a typical trip then, been there a month ago!

Reality hits full throttle when your emotional regulation circuits are back online!

And the reactivated cringe inhibitors make the embarrassment levels skyrocket!

When they are: Deep Breaths to calm down the Amygdala.

I see your brain-antenna frequency stabilized back onto this awareness channel

[Javfly33]

3 minutes ago, Spiritual Warrior said:

 

About a year ago, I made a goal for myself that I would have an enlightenment experience on August 18th, 2024. This ego death experience occurred on August 10th, 2024. This was the closest thing that I was able to manifest I guess; a very messy and terrifying taste of ego death. 

Lol 

[Sugarcoat]

That sounded pretty epic

[Spiritual Warrior]

4 hours ago, Keryo Koffa said:

@Spiritual Warrior Ah, a typical trip then, been there a month ago!

Thanks for normalizing my experience, it makes me feel better 

1 hour ago, Sugarcoat said:

That sounded pretty epic

Thanks, yeah I guess it was 

[Lyubov]

This is why I don’t recommend these substances in this kind of setting. I think it’s better to lie down in a comfortable and safe room and gently contemplate or relax into the trip. 

I also think there’s so many different facets and styles and labels for these experiences where one person calls this ego death and one thing happens in their experience and then another person has something totally different happen in their experience and they use the same label. I have had recent sober “ego deaths” as I we could call them and it is nothing like this. It’s a total sense of oneness and completeness, acceptance and resting as this point of creation. On shrooms it was similar for me as well. 

 

[Salvijus]

You nailed it

[Sugarcoat]

I had this dream a few weeks ago where a group of teens were outside and one of the girls took shrooms and started acting annoying so they dragged her up a tree and slit her stomach up and killed her. Nice dream …

[Spiritual Warrior]

5 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

I had this dream a few weeks ago where a group of teens were outside and one of the girls took shrooms and started acting annoying so they dragged her up a tree and slit her stomach up and killed her. Nice dream …

Bruh...

[Salvijus]

5 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

I had this dream a few weeks ago where a group of teens were outside and one of the girls took shrooms and started acting annoying so they dragged her up a tree and slit her stomach up and killed her. Nice dream …

 

I see some potentiol for "who has the most fucked up mind" competition here

[Sugarcoat]

2 minutes ago, Salvijus said:

 

I see some potentiol for "who has the most fucked up mind" competition here

Then I lost my mind… literally 

[Salvijus]

1 minute ago, Sugarcoat said:

Then I lost my mind… literally 

You mean after the dream? Like a "last straw" kind of thing? 

[Sugarcoat]

1 minute ago, Salvijus said:

You mean after the dream? Like a "last straw" kind of thing? 

No I meant my post where I said I feel disconnected from my thoughts. Like it’s me “losing my mind” . Not in the conventional sense of losing one’s mind 

Edited August 20 by Sugarcoat

[Salvijus]

2 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

No I meant my post where I said I feel disconnected from my thoughts. Like it’s me “losing my mind” . Not in the conventional sense of losing one’s mind 

Oh I see. Everyone here is nuts arguably. 

[Sugarcoat]

1 minute ago, Salvijus said:

Oh I see. Everyone here is nuts arguably. 

I’ve noticed it😂 I’m one of them hehe. I like it tho. 

[Salvijus]

Now we just need a pride parade

[Sugarcoat]

1 minute ago, Salvijus said:

Now we just need a pride parade

Hehe

[Jehovah increases]

7 hours ago, Spiritual Warrior said:

I experienced ego death while I was on shrooms a week ago and it was terrifying. I am posting this is as a point of reference and as a warning. If you use psychedelics recklessly, you could quite literally kill yourself. 

I took shrooms with four people, my gf and my friend and his gf. When the shrooms started to peak, I entered a dream like state in which I didn't know that I was a human being, I didn't know my own name, I didn't know what my job was, I didn't know that I had any sort of life outside of what I was experiencing right now. I didn't know who these four people were that I was with, I saw them as characters that's energy made me feel a certain way, but I had no idea who they were or how they got here. I could not comprehend how to pee. I didn't know anything, I was a blank slate, but my mind was not quiet, it was very messy with so many random and sometimes terrifying thoughts.

The scariest part of this experience was that it felt like the shrooms were trying to push me towards jumping off of this cliff and into the water, which would have been extremely dangerous. I would get closer and closer and closer, but I kept saying that I was too scared. The ocean to me in the moment was eternal love, but something inside me must have known that it was also death. If there weren't others to stop me, I might have summoned the courage to jump off because I didn't think that anything mattered, I was just this floating ball of consciousness with no past and no future and jumping into an ocean of eternal love sounded very appealing.

I did many embarrassing things during this trip which include trying to pull my girlfriends top off, barking, crying, trying to literally jump through the cars GPS screen, saying that I'd fuck my friends gf, and peeing my pants. ( I was fully conscious while peeing my pants, I just could not comprehend that it mattered.)

It was funny, I was FULLY immersed in this trip right up until I stepped out of my friend's car. As soon as I stepped out, the trip was over. I look down at my clothes and they are soaking wet with piss, my toe is bleeding, and I have one sandal on. The reality of what just transpired came crashing down on me all at once. My ego is back. 

That should not happen How many grams did you take?