No life - on the deepest level

[Schizophonia]

30 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

@Schizophonia 😂😂

Too annoying to have to limit myself so as not to take warning points.
I just want to go back to prehistory and be able to become the commander with club blows.

 

[Schizophonia]

@Salvijus Do you know if there is a limit to the frequency you can post ? It seems you have noticed that once.

I came from sugarcoat

I've just seen again the guidelines and there is nothing about that it's weird.

Edited August 19 by Schizophonia

[Salvijus]

9 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

@Salvijus Do you know if there is a limit to the frequency you can post ? It seems you have noticed that once.

I came from sugarcoat

I've just seen again the guidelines and there is nothing about that it's weird.

Approximately 3-4 pages worth of texts per day I believe. I ran into that thing bunch of times. Honestly, i vote it be removed. It's such a buzz kill

Edited August 19 by Salvijus

[Keryo Koffa]

6 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

Do you know if there is a limit to the frequency you can post ? There is nothing in the guidelines.

I've noticed that also.

On 8/17/2024 at 6:05 PM, Keryo Koffa said:

First a recursive Thread

Then cosmic
synchronicity
Numerals of 507!

The 507 is due to your own media upload limit you can navigate with "My Attachments" (Profile Dropdown)

And the Non-Posting thing might be independent, I've experienced it like 3 times, last one pre-yesterday.

I was posting vast and dense stuff before that, but it usually seems to take lots to kick in and only lasts 1d

[Salvijus]

After a second thought, maybe 5-6 pages worth of text more likely. 

[Keryo Koffa]

@Salvijus I'd say a reasonable ton! determined of course by a dynamic meta-algorithm specifically catered to you 

[Salvijus]

❤️❤️❤️ Love you guys. I'm going to sleep. 

[Keryo Koffa]

2 hours ago, Sugarcoat said:

It’s extremely low from my experience that’s what I can say at least

2 hours ago, UnbornTao said:

Not sure what it is you are going through. I'd check the our basic lifestyle factors. Create a different disposition as enthusiasm.

2 hours ago, Sugarcoat said:

I know I always write about odd things, you mean I could just make myself enthusiastic?

2 hours ago, UnbornTao said:

Yes, I'm proposing that you already do.

2 hours ago, Sugarcoat said:

I don’t feel held back, no “blocks” either. My lack of emotion and desire is due to disconnect.

2 hours ago, CARDOZZO said:

Building a new relationship

If I just read correctly in between the lines, @UnbornTao just proposed to @Sugarcoat.

Don't you worry you two! @Schizophonia and I will be the best bridesmaid and groomsman!

[UnbornTao]

4 hours ago, Sugarcoat said:

I remember when I was a child. I had this existential anxiety, no matter where I was, what I was doing, (it was a bit better during the day to be honest when there is more outside stimuli) . It reminds me a little of my situation now, how I feel the same wherever I am or do, like I just came home from a month vacation, I felt the same there as here.

We could check whether anxiety can occur whenever one is willing to be completely engaged in the present.

Quote

Maybe I just function differently than others, because I can’t seem to be able to make myself enthusiastic. I can’t find a way to create that emotion in myself, can’t create any emotion for that matter 

Is that true? You sound like you can effectively create depression, apathy, etc. Because of course you can. Fear and love are other emotions which you are also doing, among many others. You somehow overlook or become insensitive to this fact. 

So if you want, try something different now (boredom, happiness, envy, love, curiosity). This requires becoming aware of what you are "doing" by thinking what you are thinking, and changing that. 

Desire to close your fist (or pick up a book, do a pushup, whatever), then do it. Did it work? Could you create desire? You did!

Edited August 19 by UnbornTao

[Keryo Koffa]

On 8/16/2024 at 9:59 PM, Sugarcoat said:

The doctors thought I was maybe autistic but the evaluation said otherwise (weirdly enough)

On 8/16/2024 at 10:07 PM, Salvijus said:

If I had to guess, I'd say "hyper brain nervous system stimulus overload condition". I just invented that (the patent is mine!)

On 8/16/2024 at 10:10 PM, Sugarcoat said:

I was thinking schizotypal or something, no expert (pls don't sue me legal team)

18 hours ago, Carl-Richard said:

"Possible psychosis prodrome, but not sure due to drug use". (since drugs are imaginary)

18 hours ago, Sugarcoat said:

That’s what they said about me pretty much (*sigh*)

I finally found the perfect description to communicate that understanding to y'all. Here goes Nothing! 48:52 - 49:09

+ 49:15 - 49:23 "Is this a test? lol"

Edited August 20 by Keryo Koffa

[Sugarcoat]

14 hours ago, UnbornTao said:

We could check whether anxiety can occur whenever one is willing to be completely engaged in the present.

Is that true? You sound like you can effectively create depression, apathy, etc. Because of course you can. Fear and love are other emotions which you are also doing, among many others. You somehow overlook or become insensitive to this fact. 

So if you want, try something different now (boredom, happiness, envy, love, curiosity). This requires becoming aware of what you are "doing" by thinking what you are thinking, and changing that. 

Desire to close your fist (or pick up a book, do a pushup, whatever), then do it. Did it work? Could you create desire? You did!

You mean my thoughts are creating my emotions so I could control my thoughts and change them and thus change the emotion or?

[LastThursday]

Thoughts, emotions and environment all trigger and affect each other.  Change one and you change the others.

[Sugarcoat]

9 minutes ago, LastThursday said:

Thoughts, emotions and environment all trigger and affect each other.  Change one and you change the others.

True for most people 

[ICURBlessings]

On 8/16/2024 at 3:01 PM, Sugarcoat said:

Feeling disconnected from yourself, as if you almost don’t exist. 

Feeling disconnected from your thoughts, so that you barely hear nor see them.

As a consequence, feeling disconnected from reality and the world.

Barely being able to enjoy anything. Having no emotion.

And this being the case no matter where you are, what you do or who you are with. This is your normal state.

Basically having nothing, not even yourself; no life, on the deepest level. 

I have had experience with this state... and I understand how you want to find your freedom from it.

First and most importantly KNOW that IT shall PASS. Until then BE Patient with the PROCESS.

The PROCESS is there but not obvious BECAUSE what you experience FEELS-Like a "lack" of processing. That is the illusion which is normal. I mean we human mis-perceive almost everything  and most of the time - to the point that it is the 'NORM'.

One key area that you should have access and THAT will help the PROCESS is: HOW you are SEEING your future - either the rest of your life OR the next phase of your younger adult life. This PERSPECTIVE which your mind is PROJECTING as your future is also influenced by some important factors - such as how you judge yourself as a human being. Specifically WHAT you don't like about yourself MUST be transformed in some ways.

Are your views of the future of human kind and yours personally PESSIMISTIC in some ways? Have you resigned yourself to Parental or Social expectations of WHAT you are to do with your future in someway? Is your future cast in a way that does not bring JOY -  but the opposite?

Do you have a true-sense of Purpose aligned with your future or your life? It is OK to not have found one's sense of purpose at 21... Most at that age have not - BUT, and if so,  be aware that you have not - and therefore expect to discover it - and that IT will fill you with JOY.

 

[Sugarcoat]

3 minutes ago, ICURBlessings said:

I have had experience with this state... and I understand how you want to find your freedom from it.

First and most importantly KNOW that IT shall PASS. Until then BE Patient with the PROCESS.

The PROCESS is there but not obvious BECAUSE what you experience FEELS-Like a "lack" of processing. That is the illusion which is normal. I mean we human mis-perceive almost everything  and most of the time - to the point that it is the 'NORM'.

One key area that you should have access and THAT will help the PROCESS is: HOW you are SEEING your future - either the rest of your life OR the next phase of your younger adult life. This PERSPECTIVE which your mind is PROJECTING as your future is also influenced by some important factors - such as how you judge yourself as a human being. Specifically WHAT you don't like about yourself MUST be transformed in some ways.

Are your views of the future of human kind and yours personally PESSIMISTIC in some ways? Have you resigned yourself to Parental or Social expectations of WHAT you are to do with your future in someway? Is your future cast in a way that does not bring JOY -  but the opposite?

Do you have a true-sense of Purpose aligned with your future or your life? It is OK to not have found one's sense of purpose at 21... Most at that age have not - BUT, and if so,  be aware that you have not - and therefore expect to discover it - and that IT will fill you with JOY.

 

Good point. I try to have a positive outlook on the future but it can be hard. I don’t have any set plans for it tho but that’s fine for me now I’m continuing with what I’m currently doing . 

Edited August 20 by Sugarcoat

[UnbornTao]

1 hour ago, Sugarcoat said:

You mean my thoughts are creating my emotions so I could control my thoughts and change them and thus change the emotion or?

You are creating those, yes.

Edited August 20 by UnbornTao

[Sugarcoat]

Just now, UnbornTao said:

You are.

Ok 

[ICURBlessings]

6 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

Good point. I try to have a positive outlook on the future but it can be hard. I don’t have any set plans for it tho but that’s fine for me now I’m continuing with what I’m currently doing . 

 

"continuing with what I’m currently doing" - what is that? School? 

Presently - what excites you about living? And also do you have a future-prospect that excites you in some ways?

[Sugarcoat]

1 minute ago, ICURBlessings said:

 

"continuing with what I’m currently doing" - what is that? School? 

Presently - what excites you about living? And also do you have a future-prospect that excites you in some ways?

Work.

 

nothing external excites me to be honest. I just want to return to a somewhat normal internal state, that is what excites me

Edited August 20 by Sugarcoat

[Keryo Koffa]

@Sugarcoat

Have you

tried talking

to the spirits

about helping

you getting

energized?