No life - on the deepest level

[Sugarcoat]

4 minutes ago, UnbornTao said:

Yes. Who else? You already do.

I remember when I was a child. I had this existential anxiety, no matter where I was, what I was doing, (it was a bit better during the day to be honest when there is more outside stimuli) . It reminds me a little of my situation now, how I feel the same wherever I am or do, like I just came home from a month vacation, I felt the same there as here. Maybe I just function differently than others, because I can’t seem to be able to make myself enthusiastic. I can’t find a way to create that emotion in myself, can’t create any emotion for that matter 

[Carl-Richard]

On 16.8.2024 at 9:59 PM, Sugarcoat said:

But I’d be curious what doctors would put at him 

"Possible psychosis prodrome, but not sure due to drug use".

[Sugarcoat]

2 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

"Possible psychosis prodrome, but not sure due to drug use".

That’s what they said about me pretty much 

[Carl-Richard]

22 hours ago, Sugarcoat said:

Id say it’s something purely in my brain going on

Have you tried therapy?

Edited August 19 by Carl-Richard

[Salvijus]

8 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

My lack of emotion and desire is due to the disconnect I feel from myself and my thought processes. That’s just my experience 

This is good observation. But I literally sharing with you how to bring that connection back. The connection to yourself is done by putting the awareness on desire. Desire is never gone and can never be extinguished. It's only a matter of putting your awareness inward on it and allowing your attention rest there for a while so that it would rekindle the fire and your sense of self. 

Edited August 19 by Salvijus

[Sugarcoat]

2 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

Have you tried therapy?

I’m currently in regular contact with doctor. They gave me anti psychotic because my explanation for what I’m going through sounds so weird it sounds like delusions to them , and anti depressants . I’ve been on them for a while now, they make zero difference except make me a bit calmer. Two different anti psychotics made no difference I wonder if they will ever reconsider saying I have delusions 

Edited August 19 by Sugarcoat

[Keryo Koffa]

5 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

I remember when I was a child. I had this existential anxiety, no matter where I was, what I was doing, (it was a bit better during the day to be honest when there is more outside stimuli) . It reminds me a little of my situation now, how I feel the same wherever I am or do, like I just came home from a month vacation, I felt the same there as here. Maybe I just function differently than others, because I can’t seem to be able to make myself enthusiastic. I can’t find a way to create that emotion in myself, can’t create any emotion for that matter 

Now that reminds me of certain parts of my life where I scaled my emotional axis down since it also includes the fear of death, it was a universal desensitization to both negative emotions, the fear of missing out, the transience of life, nostalgia overload and fear of death/existentialism. Since I didn't have much context and awareness yet, I seemingly arbitrarily tuned this axis through early synchronicity intuition. It's been quite a journey transmuting it through growth.

5 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

"Possible psychosis prodrome, but not sure due to drug use".

Let me rephrase: "Definite psychosis postdrome, natural and catalyzed by drugs."

[Carl-Richard]

1 minute ago, Sugarcoat said:

I’m currently in regular contact with doctor. They gave me anti psychotic because my explanation for what I’m going through sounds so weird it sounds like delusions to them , and anti depressants . I’ve been on them for a while now, they make zero difference except make me a bit calmer. Two different anti psychotics made no difference I wonder if they will ever reconsider saying I have delusions 

I mean like talk therapy. Are they giving you that?

[Keryo Koffa]

2 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

Anti-Depressants only make me calmer. Anti-Psychotics made no difference. They say I have delusions 

Have you tried "pro-psychotics" for a change?

[Sugarcoat]

3 minutes ago, Salvijus said:

This is good observation. But I literally sharing with you how to bring that connection back. The connection to yourself is done by putting the awareness on desire. Desire is never gone and can never be extinguished. It's only a matter of putting your awareness inward on it. 

From my awareness I sense that I have very low desire, and I find my awareness is pretty much always inward instead of outward. Having it that way doesn’t strengthen the connection in my experience. I hope I don’t sound like I’m just negating everything but I’m just sharing my experience 

[Sugarcoat]

1 minute ago, Carl-Richard said:

I mean like talk therapy. Are they giving you that?

Not for now. I’ve talked to therapist a few times but so far they’ve done an evaluation and gave me meds and asked me how the meds are going. I don’t know what they will do in the future when they see the meds aren’t helping me, so maybe 

[Sugarcoat]

1 minute ago, Keryo Koffa said:

Have you tried "pro-psychotics" for a change?

Lmao what. Is . That. 
 

apparently anti psychotic block some dopamine in the brain. But the thing is I already feel as if my dopamine is “low”, so it’s like it’s only contributing to that. If pro psychotics do the opposite then maybe😂 

[Sugarcoat]

5 minutes ago, Keryo Koffa said:

Now that reminds me of certain parts of my life where I scaled my emotional axis down since it also includes the fear of death, it was a universal desensitization to both negative emotions, the fear of missing out, the transience of life, nostalgia overload and fear of death/existentialism. Since I didn't have much context and awareness yet, I seemingly arbitrarily tuned this axis through early synchronicity intuition. It's been quite a journey transmuting it through growth.

Don’t understand what you mean here but it’s fine 

[Sugarcoat]

@Keryo Koffa so you haven’t been evaluated for a diagnosis ? I’m asking because you write very uniquely . I do too, or I can do, they evaluated me and found no diagnosis except they say I have “delusions” . 

Edited August 19 by Sugarcoat

[Carl-Richard]

Just now, Sugarcoat said:

Not for now. I’ve talked to therapist a few times but so far they’ve done an evaluation and gave me meds and asked me how the meds are going. I don’t know what they will do in the future when they see the meds aren’t helping me, so maybe 

In my unprofessional opinion, you need a good therapist to help dive deeply into yourself.

[CARDOZZO]

Experiment with that:

• 3L Water - Daily
• Cold Showers (TRY IT - YOU WILL ASSOCIATE WITH YOUR BODY)
• Sun Exposure
• Walking/Running/Gym
• Breathwork
• Body Awareness (Zen Body-Being)
• Yoga/Yoga Nidra
• Meditation
• Holotropic Breathing
• Clean Diet
• No Sugar, No Caffeine

[Sugarcoat]

Just now, Carl-Richard said:

In my unprofessional opinion, you need a good therapist to help dive deeply into yourself.

On Thursday I’ll meet doctor  and they’ll ask how my medication is going, I’ll  ask what their plan is for the future with me. I’d have nothing against talk therapy . 

[Sugarcoat]

Just now, CARDOZZO said:

Experiment with that:

• 3L Water - Daily
• Cold Showers (TRY IT - YOU WILL ASSOCIATE WITH YOUR BODY)
• Sun Exposure
• Walking/Running/Gym
• Breathwork
• Body Awareness (Zen Body-Being)
• Yoga/Yoga Nidra
• Meditation
• Holotropic Breathing
• Clean Diet
• No Sugar, No Caffeine

Thanks for the suggestions 🙏🏻 

[CARDOZZO]

Your sleep routine is tremendously important.

7-8h of sleep - sleep around 10pm-11pm 

[Sugarcoat]

2 minutes ago, CARDOZZO said:

Your sleep routine is tremendously important.

7-8h of sleep - sleep around 10pm-11pm 

I sleep almost too much sometimes