No life - on the deepest level

[Sugarcoat]

Feeling disconnected from yourself, as if you almost don’t exist. 

Feeling disconnected from your thoughts, so that you barely hear nor see them.

As a consequence, feeling disconnected from reality and the world.

Barely being able to enjoy anything. Having no emotion.

And this being the case no matter where you are, what you do or who you are with. This is your normal state.

Basically having nothing, not even yourself; no life, on the deepest level. 

[Salvijus]

But I've seen you being cheerful. What's up with that. 

Edited August 16 by Salvijus

[Sugarcoat]

10 minutes ago, Salvijus said:

But I've seen you being cheerful. What's up with that. 

It’s all very subtle for me. I can have moments where I laugh just a little , but as I said it’s very subtle, what I described is my normal state nowadays pretty much. My family notice too, I talk very little. 

Edited August 16 by Sugarcoat

[Salvijus]

Do you have any clue what's causing it? I think it should be solvable. 

[Keryo Koffa]

I am sincerely and horrendously sorry for abusing my humor but I had to

[Sugarcoat]

1 minute ago, Salvijus said:

Do you have any clue what's causing it? I think it should be solvable. 

Yes but my explanations are too weird for people 

[Sugarcoat]

@Keryo Koffa ok that made me laugh a little to be honest 😂

[Keryo Koffa]

2 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

Yes but my explanations are too weird for people 

What does it feel like on the deepest level? Is it dissociating or void of even experience?
What is it like? As you shift between states of consciousness, what changes first?

[Sugarcoat]

5 minutes ago, Keryo Koffa said:

What does it feel like on the deepest level? Is it dissociating or void of even experience?
What is it like? As you shift between states of consciousness, what changes first?

Best way to describe is it feels like a disconnection from myself and my own thought processes . Nothing spiritual about it. Not dissociation, that for me sounds more like someone who would dissociate into their internal world to cope with something, I’m talking about a disconnection from your own internal world like you hear and see your thoughts very vaguely. 
 

“void of experience “ for me the sense of having an experience is connected to the sense of self and connection to your own mental idea of your life so yes it can be sometimes like my sense of having an experience is weakened, everything is  “subtle” for me

Edited August 16 by Sugarcoat

[Salvijus]

If Keryo can be sane, so can you! 

[Sugarcoat]

Just now, Salvijus said:

If Keryo can be sane, so can you! 

Is he tho hmmm

[Salvijus]

1 minute ago, Sugarcoat said:

Is he tho hmmm

I said he can be. I believe in him

[Keryo Koffa]

2 minutes ago, Salvijus said:

If Keryo can be sane, so can you! 

1 minute ago, Sugarcoat said:

Is he tho hmmm

To answer that question

 

[Sugarcoat]

Just now, Salvijus said:

I said he can be. I believe in him

I wanted to ask if he has a diagnosis but maybe it would’ve came off as rude 

[Keryo Koffa]

@Sugarcoat I'd break the entire social matrix the moment someone would try to diagnose me, but y'all can try

[Salvijus]

3 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

I wanted to ask if he has a diagnosis but maybe it would’ve came off as rude 

Looks okay to me. Just not typical, unique in his own way. 

Edited August 16 by Salvijus

[Sugarcoat]

3 minutes ago, Keryo Koffa said:

@Sugarcoat I'd break the entire social matrix the moment someone would try to diagnose me, but y'all can try

I wonder what a doctor would give you, if anything

[Sugarcoat]

2 minutes ago, Salvijus said:

Looks okay to me. Just not typical, unique in his own way. 

The doctors thought I was maybe autistic but the evaluation turned out that I wasn’t so sometimes one can seem like it but not be it. But I’d be curious what doctors would put at him 

[Salvijus]

8 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

. But I’d be curious what doctors would put at him 

If I had to guess, I'd say "hyper brain nervous system stimulus overload condition" 

I just invented that. But something like that lol

Edited August 16 by Salvijus

[Sugarcoat]

Just now, Salvijus said:

If I had to guess, I'd say "hyper brain nervous system stimulus overload syndrome" 

I just invented that. But something like that lol

I was thinking schizotypal or something (I’m no expert tho) that was one of the potential diagnosis the doctors thought I might have but the evaluation came to the conclusion I didn’t have it