Kundalini naga panchami

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

 

I feel transient sometimes. In the natural world, you don't have to worry about anything. Everything is special. Everything is beautiful. Everything is perfect. 

 

Edited September 3 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

 

If you're battling a crisis you can be your own. Still. Nothing changes. There's nothing to worry. 

Everything is perfect as it is. I know my emotions are a roller coaster. 

My husband helps me with it though. 

 

 

 

Edited September 3 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

Sometimes I just get emotional for nothing. 

 

 

Edited September 3 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

I want to keep exploring myself. 

 

 

 

 

Edited September 3 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

 

 

 

I can't suffocate my emotions. I can never be a fake person. I always have to be myself. And I'm myself.

 

 

Edited September 3 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

 

But somewhere I have lost myself. I have lost who I really am. At some point I suffered some kind of a brain rot. 

Whats permanent in life? I really don't know. What's worth having. What's worth sacrificing for? What's worth my own time and attention?

Edited September 3 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

Jordan Peterson has recently become my role model for how a person should conduct themselves in both public and personal life. His eloquence just blows me away. 

 

 

Edited September 3 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

I think spirituality is all about integration. Sometimes I agree with Leo's version of post modernism. 

 

 

Edited September 3 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

 

I feel the way a person feels after a brain injury. It's that bad. My IQ dropped by a great margin. I suffered brain injury in some way and that contributed to my autism too. I wish I could undo things somewhere along the way.. I wish I hadn't suffered serious trauma. 

 

Edited September 3 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

Everyone wants to have things their way. That's the problem. I'm more into myself. I'm recoiling in annoyance. I just don't want to think about anything. I want to be a shut in. A hermit. Spirituality really makes more sense now. I forgot that my goal was ultimate kundalini awakening. 

[Buck Edwards]

I woke up. And I had a nightmare about deportations. I feared being deported from my own country. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

Found a cute money meditation that my husband recommended to me. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

This video brought me to tears. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

Got a scam FedEx call. 

https://www.quora.com/I-got-a-call-from-FedEx-saying-some-illegal-item-shipped-from-Mumbai-to-Thailand-Is-it-possible-to-use-my-ID-and-send-it-without-my-consent

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

[Buck Edwards]

 

I love this makeup 

 

[Buck Edwards]

I don't want to try fasting. 

I have a couple of stuff on my list. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

Every moment is an opportunity to live spiritually. 

And we have to make every bit of it. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

Life is about survival. Life is about continuation. Life is about living. Life is about beauty, security and comfort. Life is also about challenges and trying one's best to create the best life. 

[Buck Edwards]

I always wanted a high IQ. But it's okay. I'll check my IQ from time to time. I'll also try the dual n back technique as well. Life is too demanding sometimes. It's best to block myself from the world if I want a true  spiritual life.