I Used Psychedelics Irresponsibly. Any Advice?

[LifeEnjoyer]

Hello everyone,

So I started taking psychedelics too young; I was 17 and it was my second semester of senior year. I thought this was the perfect time to take some mushrooms because that's what my brother (29) said he did when he first tried it. The first trip was really solid; I got my child-like sense of wonder back (which I had lost during COVID) and felt so free, until a couple of days later, when I went back to school and had all the anxieties come back.

Funny enough, that's when I found Actualized.org. I looked up "How to get over what others think of you," and his video popped up first. It's safe to say I've been hooked ever since.

So I'm 20 now, and on one of my recent DMT trips, I was experiencing pure, unfiltered, unconditional love. It was amazing, but it also really made me rethink how unserious I was about this work. I received a direct flood of insights from God that I can barely remember. I've been meditating and whatnot, but I can barely make it through one week of consistent, strong determination sitting before quitting. I think I'm so far ahead on the journey when I might be even worse off now.

It's like I cheated to achieve that state.

From 17–20, I tripped probably 30 times, a mix of shrooms, acid, ayahuasca, and DMT. I was using these psychedelics under the guise that I could achieve this state all the time, using them like I would use a cheat code in a video game. I heard these words from them, and I don't know if I'm allowed to say his name on this forum because he's banned, but his initials are C.M. So yeah, he may have motivated me to take some psychs in the past, but at the end of the day, I was the one using them irresponsibly, and I take full responsibility.

So from this point forward, I'm quitting psychedelics until I'm more mature. I am 100% committed to this.

Another question I have is whether my serotonin receptors are compromised, which may not be the best option in this situation. I ask this because I combined acid with the antidepressants that I was prescribed. I don't think it's over, but I'd like to hear any other advice y'all have.

I don't know; for the most part, I'm just confused. Sometimes I took these psychedelics in situations I most definitely shouldn't have, publicly too (like reputation-fucking experiences).

Anything is appreciated.

Thank you.

Edited August 11 by LifeEnjoyer

[Ishanga]

@LifeEnjoyer I'm not a psychedelic user, other than marijuana but I don't use that regularly either, but have tried it many times before, I would like to experiment with psychedelics in the future at the right time.

You are like all of Us, we want to have a Grander Experience in our Lives and more consistently, as Humans we have a Strong Desire trait, meaning we have a built in motivation system within Us that makes us want to be more than what we are right now, the thing is we want to do this in a positive way, something that we can build upon so that we can find out what our True Potential is, its the same for everyone, our potential is unlimited via our ability to Experience Life within Ourselves...

My Advice is to do what You said You want to do, stop taking the psychedelics, you will become addicted to them and chase the experience of what they provide if You don't.

Get Healthy, live a Healthy Life, find a good Spiritual practice that works on all levels of what it means to be Human, the Body, Mind, Emotional and Energy aspects of what You are, Accept things as they are, Live more in the present Moment, these two things will reduce the Stress Response in your system, this alone is a life changer, if no Stress is experienced then Peace and Ease will come into Your Life, via that things improve and Potentials start arising..  You want to get to a point where Your Baseline Awareness/Consciousness is solid and unbreakable so that You are Free from suffering of any sort, this empowers You greatly and allows Free Will to come into Your Life, from that You can go in any direction You want to go!

[Leo Gura]

It's all good man, just don't use them for a few years. You will be all right.

[ICURBlessings]

Interesting, during the same age I did a lot of psychedelic experimentations - like you - and I completely stopped at about 20.

I was very serious about these experimentations - they were not part of my fun time like most people around me were doing. I was seriously wanting to explore the Mind beyond its pre-programmed limits.

Like you I came to realize that there was a 'cheating" aspect to using psychedelics since the experiences were biologically/chemically controlled - However there is a value in having made such explorations - it helps understanding how limited is our normal state of mind and also how reality is not what it seem at all. Of course here I am just skimming over the vast amount of details that are part of the left-overs that one can benefit from these experiences.

It has been many, many decades that I have lived since - and yes I have work hard to explore the Mind naturally since - not easy in some ways - although realizing how we are the creators of our own obstacles is inherent to the process.

I see your reasoning leading you to the conclusion "So from this point forward, I'm quitting psychedelics until I'm more mature." - as being inspired from your higher Mind. 

You also said "Another question I have is whether my serotonin receptors are compromised, which may not be the best option in this situation. I ask this because I combined acid with the antidepressants that I was prescribed."  If you take good care of your health, and cultivate Peace within you, the biology of your body will eventually catchup to the changing-self on this transformative journey.

[LifeEnjoyer]

Thanks, everybody. I will take your counsel to heart. Very grateful.

[Forestluv]

I've found that taking extended breaks from psychedelics can allow for integration into my baseline level of consciousness. I took a year-long break and during that time, many insights / realizations arose that were related to previous trips. It's as if previous trips created doors into walls. . . doors that I couldn't open at the time - yet could be opened later.

[LifeEnjoyer]

14 minutes ago, Forestluv said:

I've found that taking extended breaks from psychedelics can allow for integration into my baseline level of consciousness. I took a year-long break and during that time, many insights / realizations arose that were related to previous trips. It's as if previous trips created doors into walls. . . doors that I couldn't open at the time - yet could be opened later.

Thank you. Although my breaks lasted no more than three months, I've discovered the same thing. Is this just regular meditation and introspection time, or is there anything else to do to bring out these insights?

[Forestluv]

@LifeEnjoyer That is a super good question. . . For me, one thing I've learned is that I can't make insights happen. I can't take a walk in nature and turn on insights. This is why they are really special to me. There is a sense of grace, appreciation and fun when they arise. Like a gift. 

Although I can't make them happen, I can get into a mindset that is welcoming for insights to arise. This includes a relaxed mind that isn't pre-occupied. Yet perhaps most important, a mindset of curiosity to explore and create. . .  My favorite mindspaces are like a half-dream state, where it feels like I'm a co-creator in what's arising. Some of what arises seems to come from beyond me, yet there is also a sense that I'm participating in creating the overall mindspace.

[LifeEnjoyer]

@Forestluv 

Thank you; wow, I have observed the same thing too but was never able to articulate it like you have.

It brings back memories of the day I was strolling in the forest after an acid trip when everything seemed to be working simultaneously. I enjoy savoring all that nature has to offer, and during this period, I simply felt a strong connection to everything. When a question broke me down in tears, "Why am I?" Why was I so lucky to witness reality's magic? Although I never really found the solution I was hoping for, I have grown much more aware of everything since then.

It was amazing; only in this calm, appreciative mindset, as you described, could I reach it. So thanks for sharing; that was a memory I had sort of forgotten, but it was rather lovely!

[Chadders]

@LifeEnjoyer From reading your comment you actually come across very sensible to me and mature. The psychedelics have pushed you forward in one way or another but if it feels right to step away from them then do that

I’ve done LSD and mushrooms but never DMT so you’ve gone to the next level. In a similar fashion I do not believe I am mature enough/ready for DMT yet

You could just stick with mushrooms on a low dose or lsd. Whichever you prefer and that levels up your meditation

I’m going through an LSD phase as I find they help me develop my exstrospective side

 

[LifeEnjoyer]

On 8/17/2024 at 3:48 AM, Chadders said:

@LifeEnjoyer From reading your comment you actually come across very sensible to me and mature. The psychedelics have pushed you forward in one way or another but if it feels right to step away from them then do that

I’ve done LSD and mushrooms but never DMT so you’ve gone to the next level. In a similar fashion I do not believe I am mature enough/ready for DMT yet

You could just stick with mushrooms on a low dose or lsd. Whichever you prefer and that levels up your meditation

I’m going through an LSD phase as I find they help me develop my exstrospective side

 

Thanks a lot for this reply

[Ero]

My first trip was at 16, I’m 22 now and have had about 30 total between LSD and mushrooms. I have prolonged periods of focus without much psychs, and it works for me to come back from time to time, but I don’t go as deep as say Leo or other psychonauts here do. I know I will eventually, but this is the age for foundational ‘grind’, sorting out one’s future. Totally understandable to leave psychedelics for a few years until you build a foundation. You are already ahead of the curve.

[LifeEnjoyer]

On 8/22/2024 at 5:52 AM, Ero said:

My first trip was at 16, I’m 22 now and have had about 30 total between LSD and mushrooms. I have prolonged periods of focus without much psychs, and it works for me to come back from time to time, but I don’t go as deep as say Leo or other psychonauts here do. I know I will eventually, but this is the age for foundational ‘grind’, sorting out one’s future. Totally understandable to leave psychedelics for a few years until you build a foundation. You are already ahead of the curve.

Appreciate it.

[Human Mint]

Hi, as long as you have a good sleep hygiene then little to no problem. At that age is easy to not take care of sleep.

I do think good sleep is the big pillar for this work.

If you don't believe me then see that Alzheimer's disease is related to a detriment of sleep, which in turn impairs deep-sleep even further, worsening the condition.

In retrospect, I think is a bad idea to trip when you've had a bad night's sleep. You'll feel weaker and you won't be able to consolidate the trip the same way bad sleep fails to consolidate memories.

Edited August 29 by Human Mint