Virgin 27 Male - Suicidal Rage

[Leo Gura]

A girl does not need to be crazy to cause you drama and headaches.

A truly crazy girl would destroy your life.

Edited Sunday at 08:03 PM by Leo Gura

[Yali]

2 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

A girl does not need to be crazy to cause you drama and headaches.

 

ah okay, so you're using the term crazy  to loosely describe a girl who on any given day experiences a wide range of emotions. but can such a girl not manage those emotions in such a way that it doesn't produce drama? i think if one is producing drama, that is more a manner of maturity than whether she is highly feminine or not. @Leo Gura

[Leo Gura]

@Yali Go find out what girls are like.

Edited Sunday at 08:11 PM by Leo Gura

[AION]

5 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

 

Of course sex is nice, but it's not as nice as people make it out to be.

Don't forget that sex ain't free. You'll be paying for it somehow. Usually with crazy drama. You will have to deal with all sorts of girl nonsense just to get that sex. Some degree of that is okay, but it does get old after a certain point.

I'm not saying don't pursue sex or relationships. Pursue it. But don't exaggerate its importance to your happiness. A day will come when you will wish you were single and free. When you finally realize your need for girls was largely a fantasy of your own making you will finally find some peace and happiness. Don't confuse horny excitement and drama for peace and happiness.

If you watch porn it is very hard to limit yourself to a girl because you are used to variety. Porn is a like an all you can eat restaurant with different kinds of cuisines. And if you have a gf you have to limit yourself to not one cuisine, but to one dish. So your nervous system and your brain is not used to it.

When I had a gf I stopped watching porn and because I have a high libido and starving for some, I was more than happy to have her twice a week and I really enjoyed the sex and loving embrace. Probably enjoyed the loving embrace as much as the sex. But my body was just happy to get a release so it didn't matter.

Love is sacred in my opinion. That is why people who see it like that are able to stay together for a life time. I'm not that far because I'm still hooked on porn again. But what you said on the end is so true. When I have a gf I wished I was alone and have the freedom, but if I have all the freedom and starving for love I want a gf. A man is never happy.

Sex should be a sacred thing, but if one sees sex as a casual thing, it is very hard to bond with another person. This counts especially for women but for men too. I would never settle down with a girl with a high body count: that is where the craziness comes from, a girl can't fuck around and still be sane! That is just asking for trouble. Probably I'm going to find a good Christian girl (although not chrstian) to settle down with to start a family with but those good ones are like needles in a haystack.

[Leo Gura]

1 hour ago, AION said:

If you watch porn it is very hard to limit yourself to a girl because you are used to variety.

This goes way deeper than porn. You wish your desire for variety was only caused by porn.

But yeah. A huge reason why sex without a girl is better is because you can get infinite free variety and quality on a whim. Everything has its pros and cons.

Edited Sunday at 09:38 PM by Leo Gura

[UnbornTao]

Cheer up.

I never heard Newton complain  

[Davino]

@Yali What I meant by "crazy" is that facts to women may totally be opaqued by feelings. Which to the masculine mind is craziness, it does feel like cognitive dissonance. The more feminine a women is the more her feelings are amplified. However, it makes sense if your brain is firing hormones and your emotions are 10x in comparison with your male experience. This feeling fact is also beneficial, of course, that's why you feel attracted to such polarity. Being able to feel allows for example for great empathy and connection. She might be awesome with kids, you just hear the baby cry, she can feel into what it needs with more precision than a man could ever dream of. 

On the other hand, I'm still contemplating on the rol of drama in women. Still many questions unanswered there. Btw, I got a great insight the other day about why women love to gossip, it's part of their survival mechanism, to understand and be acquainted with the social domain.

[Davino]

1 hour ago, AION said:

If you watch porn it is very hard to limit yourself to a girl because you are used to variety. Porn is a like an all you can eat restaurant with different kinds of cuisines. And if you have a gf you have to limit yourself to not one cuisine, but to one dish. So your nervous system and your brain is not used to it.

In case you assume a monogamous relationship or just one wife/husband. There are many types of relationships which can be crafted which don't fall under those assumptions.

[Leo Gura]

10 minutes ago, Davino said:

There are many types of relationships which can be crafted which don't fall under those assumptions.

So even more drama

[fabger]

10 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

But also, frankly, jerking off can be more enjoyable than sex with girls. You'll be surprised that sex with girls is not as good as it seems. I can have a better sex by myself. When you realize this it's a huge relief.

Lol so true. Incels create their own suffering by mystifying sex.

[Davino]

7 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

So even more drama

So many languages and you decided to speak Truth

The art of joggling is inferior to the art of craftsmanship.

[Davino]

@fabger it really is true, sometimes I see a super hot women on the street and lose my poise for a moment, then I remember even if I fucked her it's not even that amazing afterall.

[AION]

9 hours ago, Davino said:

In case you assume a monogamous relationship or just one wife/husband. There are many types of relationships which can be crafted which don't fall under those assumptions.

Those are not natural for humans and they won’t hold up nor be satisfying. If you are young it is fun to have FWB but when you get older I don’t think it will be fun to be that guy. 

Edited Monday at 07:29 AM by AION

[Davino]

18 minutes ago, AION said:

Those are not natural for humans and they won’t hold up nor be satisfying.

I would disagree.

Why then is there infidelity since the beginning of times? Why then today in regions like Africa and the middle east Polygyny is the social norm?

Be careful with making western values universally embedded into the human DNA. Literally millions of humans have both holded and been satisfied by non-monogamous relationships in the history of mankind, so let that fact sink in.

I gravitate more towards the dual-mating hypothesis, which suggests that humans evolved a mix of monogamous and non-monogamous tendencies to balance reproductive and social needs.

[AION]

@Davino you are serious giving Africa as the pinnacle of civilization 🤣

[Lyubov]

17 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Sex with the same girl will soon get boring. And many other factors will diminish the quality of real-world sex: from problems with timing, to girls who are bad at sex, to condoms, to pregnancy scares, and more.

Of course sex is nice, but it's not as nice as people make it out to be.

Don't forget that sex ain't free. You'll be paying for it somehow. Usually with crazy drama. You will have to deal with all sorts of girl nonsense just to get that sex. Some degree of that is okay, but it does get old after a certain point.

I'm not saying don't pursue sex or relationships. Pursue it. But don't exaggerate its importance to your happiness. A day will come when you will wish you were single and free. When you finally realize your need for girls was largely a fantasy of your own making you will finally find some peace and happiness. Don't confuse horny excitement and drama for peace and happiness.

I’ve found this all to be true as well. I’ve struggled with letting go of a woman I been with for a while based off of beliefs of scarcity and lack and also beliefs having to do with gaining value by pleasing someone I see as family, loyalty and beliefs about love having to be rare and exclusive to be true. There is a whole prison we can create for ourselves around relationships where we entirely forget we have our own value regardless of this relationship or person. It can be very hard to get out of. Especially if you particularly grow close to one girl, that relationship ending is like a death and something about that is very hard to accept when looking at it through the mind / ego / inner child. It can really expose a huge inner misconception about needing to earn value outside oneself and also resolve some massive misconceptions about family and other people giving us value. 

I struggled for years with women and was very isolated, separated, self imposed separation. This issue of a lack of relationships with women ties directly into a lot of core childhood issues that form alongside the ego. Misconceptions of needing someone else to be whole and one. But the interesting thing about it is that people like the OP can’t be forced or told that this sort of rage they have around this issue is trivial. I can really relate to how this issue of not dating and being able to meet women can become so incredibly hard for men these days. Being told lofty spiritual stuff or given perspectives on how this issue isn’t as big as it is I found wasn’t helpful for me resolving this, even after being with many women since the core issue I still need to revisit and let go and my understanding of it has grown much deeper and deeper, it culminates ultimately in accepting eternal change and death. 

In my opinion what OP needs to do is really open up. I do think OP should seek professional therapy. He said he doesn’t want to but I think this is a massive blunder. OP needs this. It helps create space and a freeing. It’s ironic but this holding on to the anger is oddly enough what keeps us stuck. Just having someone who actually knows what men face today, a male therapist who knows how hard dating and relationships are today, this can help a ton: do not get some clinical weirdo or a woman therapist. Get a male therapist in his 30s/40s who isn’t gay or an overly SJW. This will help a ton and help release a lot of contraction on this issue. From there OP can start to become more resourceful and start learning about women and going places to socialize. Right now OP is in extreme separation, they need to open up and reconnect more and regain energy to then start to learn how to socialize and do pickup or whatever: