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How to overcome attachment?

45 posts in this topic

17 hours ago, Carl-Richard said:

 The price for enlightenment is your life.

What — you expect to still have an ego while living in an egoless state? You expect to be able to do things, to have goals and desires, to feel accomplishment and pride, to feel like you're just a normal everyday person? Your only job while being enlightened is to channel God's will. There is no more you in that picture.

 but from the inside, you're God's puppet.

If i may add, i would say that is necesary Only Before enlightment.

But once total surrender happens , turns out there wasn't any ego in the first place, just God.

So once Realization happens, surrender is no longer necesary because God Realizes the ego was never real. 😂😂😂

 

@Someone here dont get obssessed with trascending attachment. Why?

The Only reason you are attached to your phone, or anything by that Matter, is because just by your own existence reality does not feel complete 

Tell me, if you could just sit by Yourself Alone, or Walk around doing nothing, and you would feel stimulated, entertained and you would feel Love, would you go running to check your instagram feed? No, right?

So what is happening IS that since just Being by your own, just the experience of existing is not pleasurable or entertaining enough, you have to seek constantly in the outside stimulation.

 

So clearly is not a problem of attachment, is a problem that whatever your Being is, is not feeling how It should be feeling. Is not Activated and therefore is Lost in Mind and compulsion.


Fear is just a thought

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2 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

If i may add, i would say that is necesary Only Before enlightment.

But once total surrender happens , turns out there wasn't any ego in the first place, just God.

So once Realization happens, surrender is no longer necesary because God Realizes the ego was never real. 😂😂😂

Of course.


Intrinsic joy is revealed in the marriage of meaning and being.

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On 28.6.2024 at 9:51 PM, Someone here said:

I have shifted my focus on my spiritual work from chasing "awakening " or "God-Consciousness " to what is called "liberation ".

Liberation is the total and complete acceptance of reality as it is .and transcending all fears and needs .and of course the cherry on top of the cake  is complete freedom from suffering.  That's honestly what I care about in the spiritual path. Leo cares about understanding reality down to every molecule. That's his trip .I'm not concerned with it . My trip is total freedom from absolutely everything including enlightenment or awakening or God-Realization or what have you .

 And i think that Everyone MUST have his own spirituality.  Imo no two people should have the same spiritual path . It must be unique to you . 

So..with getting clear about my genuine spiritual goals ..I find attachment to good and bad to be the ultimate obstacle. I'm attached to all kinds of shit like a kid in a candy store. And it's a pipe dream to achieve liberation with this kind of intense attachment in me .to give you an example i Just broke my phone last week and I had to spend two day without it before buying a new one . And those two days felt like eternity . I was sooooo fuucking disturbed and out of sorts.  Because of how I'm addicted to my smartphone and Internet and technology in general. 

So my question basically for anyone dealing with something similar..what is the best way to overcome childish attachments to soften my way to spiritual freedom?

Thanks !

Vipassana meditation is the most simple way to get over attachment that I know of.

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The only real way to detach yourself from everything is to completely identify with existence. Existence always exists and its content is always changing, so attaching to its content is a mistake, and attaching to existence is unnecessary since you are and always were. The problem is that this is very difficult, when things get minimally tense. 

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Posted (edited)

On 29/06/2024 at 2:12 AM, Carl-Richard said:

You have to really mean it if you actually want liberation/enlightenment. That is why enlightenment is no joke. The price for enlightenment is your life.

What — you expect to still have an ego while living in an egoless state? You expect to be able to do things, to have goals and desires, to feel accomplishment and pride, to feel like you're just a normal everyday person? Your only job while being enlightened is to channel God's will. There is no more you in that picture.

Again, from the outside, you might look just like any other person; with goals and desires, with meaning and purpose; but from the inside, you're God's puppet.

But that's the paradox of it ..on one hand I do want to be totally free like a feather in the wind or a stoned sufi fool ..not giving a fuck about a single damnn thing in this entire world including death ..and on the other side I'm attached to my fucking phone ..the gap is huge .

Edited by Someone here

my mind is gone to a better place.  I'm elevated ..going out of space . And I'm gone .

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Posted (edited)

You're just chasing your own tail. It's already liberation. Anything you do to try to achieve liberation will only reinforce the I/self that it is not already liberated. How can liberation be achieved by doing something. Think about it and I'm not trying to downplay your efforts or being smart or anything and non dual talk and blah blah blah. 

I'm being very serious here and trying to open your eyes on what you're actually doing. Trying to achieve liberation will never happen by doing something to try and achieve liberation. Letting go of attachments also means letting go of the need to seek liberation. 

Liberation does not mean transcending fears and all needs and suffering. It is the recognition/realization that there's no one to liberate and that liberation is already the case through all the fears, needs and sufferings. Liberation is the recognition that all fears and suffering, sadness and all these negative things are not happening to anyone, not permanent, they are energies moving through just like any other and will ,move through in due time if not resisted. 

Yes, it does feel personal; yes, it does feel painful, yes it does seem to be happening to "me". Liberation is the recognition that it's an appearance, energy in motion and the body us capable of handling it if left alone to be there. The body is not equipped to hold on to long-lasting states. That's why depression arises. It's the attempt to hold on to happiness that was once felt and now there's a demand to keep it there forever. Embrace the suffering and unhappiness and sadness just as you do the happiness and joy. Nothing stands still, everything is moving through in the appearance, none of it sees you. You see it because you've identified as a doer and an individual with free will and choice. That's the energy that's doing this. It's automatic because you're not choosing to.

It's hopeless because the one that's looking for liberation doesn't exist. It cannot be liberated because the seeking energy sees itself as separate from the whole and that's why it suffers to begin with. It's like you expecting not to feel pain when you sever your arm from the body; it's automatic. Now you're seeking to sew the arm back on. That will just be temporary too and can be ripped apart by anything that doesn't align with what is being sought after. That's what I mean by chasing your own tail. You're seeking something that's not lost. Go ahead and enjoy your attachments and desires without excuses and needing to liberate yourself from these attachments. You're being enslaved once more by feeling you need to let go of attachments. The key is to see them for what they are; even the fact that you're attached should not mean anything negative because you're not attached, it's energy. You can call it an attachment energy that has nothing to do with the individual. It's an energy on it's own that arose out of nowhere and go back to nowhere. Leave it alone.

Edited by Princess Arabia

 

 

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22 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

You're just chasing your own tail. It's already liberation. Anything you do to try to achieve liberation will only reinforce the I/self that it is not already liberated. How can liberation be achieved by doing something. Think about it and I'm not trying to downplay your efforts or being smart or anything and non dual talk and blah blah blah. 

I'm being very serious here and trying to open your eyes on what you're actually doing. Trying to achieve liberation will never happen by doing something to try and achieve liberation. Letting go of attachments also means letting go of the need to seek liberation. 

Liberation does not mean transcending fears and all needs and suffering. It is the recognition/realization that there's no one to liberate and that liberation is already the case through all the fears, needs and sufferings. Liberation is the recognition that all fears and suffering, sadness and all these negative things are not happening to anyone, not permanent, they are energies moving through just like any other and will ,move through in due time if not resisted. 

Yes, it does feel personal; yes, it does feel painful, yes it does seem to be happening to "me". Liberation is the recognition that it's an appearance, energy in motion and the body us capable of handling it if left alone to be there. The body is not equipped to hold on to long-lasting states. That's why depression arises. It's the attempt to hold on to happiness that was once felt and now there's a demand to keep it there forever. Embrace the suffering and unhappiness and sadness just as you do the happiness and joy. Nothing stands still, everything is moving through in the appearance, none of it sees you. You see it because you've identified as a doer and an individual with free will and choice. That's the energy that's doing this. It's automatic because you're not choosing to.

It's hopeless because the one that's looking for liberation doesn't exist. It cannot be liberated because the seeking energy sees itself as separate from the whole and that's why it suffers to begin with. It's like you expecting not to feel pain when you sever your arm from the body; it's automatic. Now you're seeking to sew the arm back on. That will just be temporary too and can be ripped apart by anything that doesn't align with what is being sought after. That's what I mean by chasing your own tail. You're seeking something that's not lost. Go ahead and enjoy your attachments and desires without excuses and needing to liberate yourself from these attachments. You're being enslaved once more by feeling you need to let go of attachments. The key is to see them for what they are; even the fact that you're attached should not mean anything negative because you're not attached, it's energy. You can call it an attachment energy that has nothing to do with the individual. It's an energy on it's own that arose out of nowhere and go back to nowhere. Leave it alone.

Thank you . Helpful advice. 

This is mind blowing!! Literally!! I've been into this for years but this comment hit like a train. You shattered my ego lady.

 


my mind is gone to a better place.  I'm elevated ..going out of space . And I'm gone .

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@Someone here I also have deep seated attachments though it fluctuates depending on my state and connectedness to the divine. The more connected to love the less attached to what the world has to offer

One thing I have managed to do is break much of my attachment to material wealth. Used to be more driven by that but now I do not care. I find so much satisfaction in the simple things. This is basically the snake oil that we are sold with capitalism. That to be happy you need more money and more things! Buy buy buy

I do believe it is fine however, to want the goodies life offers, but to need it is the problem. I mean who would say no to a million cash in the bank? Of course you would want that if someone offered but if they changed their mind, that’s okay too.

Perhaps that’s the question to contemplate on a trip. Do I really need this to be happy? I can want it for sure, but if the universe says no, then can I be okay with that?

In terms of smart phone attachment I often go for long bike rides and walks and leave my phone at home. I can be out for hours with no device on hand. Give that a go 

Bless you on your spiritual journey 🙏

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Posted (edited)

Attachment doesn't stay. It is very ephemeral. It is like a hologram that appears and disappears. You have to make a conscious effort to bring it up and think about it. Pay attention to when it vanishes and how it feels for it to vanish. If you watch it appear and disappear like that, you will naturally become disillusioned.

Edited by Osaid

Describe a thought.

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8 minutes ago, Chadders said:

@Someone here I also have deep seated attachments though it fluctuates depending on my state and connectedness to the divine. The more connected to love the less attached to what the world has to offer

One thing I have managed to do is break much of my attachment to material wealth. Used to be more driven by that but now I do not care. I find so much satisfaction in the simple things. This is basically the snake oil that we are sold with capitalism. That to be happy you need more money and more things! Buy buy buy

I do believe it is fine however, to want the goodies life offers, but to need it is the problem. I mean who would say no to a million cash in the bank? Of course you would want that if someone offered but if they changed their mind, that’s okay too.

Perhaps that’s the question to contemplate on a trip. Do I really need this to be happy? I can want it for sure, but if the universe says no, then can I be okay with that?

In terms of smart phone attachment I often go for long bike rides and walks and leave my phone at home. I can be out for hours with no device on hand. Give that a go 

Bless you on your spiritual journey 🙏

Thanks brother .

Obviously that's the conundrum.  If someone offered me a billion bucks cash ..I'm more than ready to literally kill for it . I know it's sad but that's the funk . I'm still young and honestly I'm not as much experienced in life .so I don't know what should i do generally speaking. But i stumbled upon the possibility of transcendence of all attachment as I was reading into Buddhism. 

I appreciate all you said but I will boil down my question to this: is Karma real? If I'm attached in this life that means I was attached in a previous life and I'm now paying the price? 

About the phone thing. I can't even take a walk without putting my headphones and listen  to music. 

13 minutes ago, Osaid said:

Attachment doesn't stay. It is very ephemeral. It is like a hologram that appears and disappears. You have to make a conscious effort to bring it up and think about it. Pay attention to when it vanishes and how it feels for it to vanish. If you watch it appear and disappear like that, you will naturally become disillusioned.

But it doesn't end.  It's something akin to pornography. The options are endless .and you can't exhaust and watch all the content in one lifetime lol. So you go on clicking on the next porn clip ..hunting for the perfect clip to jerk off to and it never fucking ends . Yes there is a ebb and flow to desire .but that makes it even more demonic and tricky .


my mind is gone to a better place.  I'm elevated ..going out of space . And I'm gone .

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Posted (edited)

18 minutes ago, Someone here said:

But it doesn't end.  It's something akin to pornography. The options are endless .and you can't exhaust and watch all the content in one lifetime lol. So you go on clicking on the next porn clip ..hunting for the perfect clip to jerk off to and it never fucking ends . Yes there is a ebb and flow to desire .but that makes it even more demonic and tricky .

The key is understanding what it is, not looking to stop it. 

You only want to stop it because you are assuming that it has some kind of power to it. That assumption is the attachment. And now because of that assumption, you are ironically attached to stopping attachment. The belief in attachment is itself attachment. Attachment is purely an assumption, nothing else. It is purely fueled by an assumption, otherwise it has no other power to it. If you understand what it is, it will lose all of its importance because you will realize that it isn't describing anything that actually exists.

There is no experience of attachment, there is only an experience of a belief in attachment. In the same way that there is no Santa Claus, only an experienced belief. This belief goes on until the belief is dispelled, and realized to never have been experienced.

The only reason you are attached is because you think you can imagine things to be attached to; but there is no such experience. There is just the assumption that there are objects from past and future which relate to you.

Very simply, if you stop imagining the past and future, there is no attachment. Because then there is nothing to lose. There is your "liberation." 

Attachment is the assumption that you can experience a past and a future. The assumption can be dispelled by examining the experience of thinking. "Attachment" is thinking happening now, and your entire life has been thinking happening now, nothing else.

Edited by Osaid

Describe a thought.

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21 minutes ago, Someone here said:

I appreciate all you said but I will boil down my question to this: is Karma real? If I'm attached in this life that means I was attached in a previous life and I'm now paying the price? 

In my experience karma is definitely real. When I am out of alignment with the divine the world will respond with pain. That is just part of the journey of life and the learning process

I’m not sure about the concept of a past life and that impacting you now - that is not something I consider in my experience of the universe and where I am right now. However there is generational trauma that gets past down from our parents and this goes back thousands of years from the point that civilisation was created off the back of violence and conflict. We have to try and unfuck ourselves by connecting with the divine  

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9 minutes ago, Osaid said:

The key is understanding what it is, not looking to stop it. You only want to stop it because you are assuming that it has some kind of power to it. That assumption is the attachment. And now because of that assumption, you are ironically attached to stopping attachment. The belief in attachment is itself attachment

Thanks this does sound illuminating and liberating  ..but at the end of the day there is a difference between Sadhguru or Ramana Maharshi and a pot addict . I mean let's be real here .."attached to ending attachment is itself the attachment so you are perpetuating it " I get it .but does this actually help practically ? I highly doubt. Although im open to what you're suggesting. 

15 minutes ago, Osaid said:

Attachment is purely an assumption, nothing else. It is purely fueled by an assumption, otherwise it has no other power to it. If you understand what it is, it will lose all of its importance because you will realize that it isn't describing anything that actually exists. There is no experience of attachment, there is only an experience of a belief in attachment. In the same way that there is no Santa Claus, only an experienced belief. This belief goes on until the belief is dispelled, and realized to never have been experienced. The only reason you are attached is because you think you can imagine things to be attached to; but there is no such experience. There is just the assumption that there are objects from past and future which relate to you.

Please explain to me ..I gave a concrete example..I literally can start screaming and crying like a toddler if I lost my phone ..how is it that you say there are no tangible things we are attached to ?

16 minutes ago, Osaid said:

Very simply, if you stop imagining the past and future, there is no attachment. Because then there is nothing to lose. There is your "liberation." 

But I can't stop imagination. Nor is it my actual mindset in life that I have nothing to lose . Maybe I will get to that point by the time I'm 70 years old and already sick and tired of it all. Again..I'm not trying to dismiss what you are saying..I'm just trying to help myself and not fool myself with fantastic unrealistic methods of fixing my problems. 

19 minutes ago, Osaid said:

Attachment is the assumption that you can experience a past and a future. The assumption can be dispelled by examining the experience of thinking. "Attachment" is thinking happening now, and your entire life has been thinking happening now, nothing else.

Agreed .


my mind is gone to a better place.  I'm elevated ..going out of space . And I'm gone .

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@Someone hereI understand what @OsaidIs saying. Try to see the meaning behind all he's saying as he raises some very good points and is pointing to something more than just the surface meaning of attachment and what is really going on.


 

 

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Posted (edited)

On 7/2/2024 at 4:02 PM, Someone here said:

difference between Sadhguru or Ramana Maharshi and a pot addict

Difference is a concept not experienced. Like "non-existence." 

On 7/2/2024 at 4:02 PM, Someone here said:

does this actually help practically

Practically, I would suggest looking at thoughts appear and disappear as suggested before. 

On 7/2/2024 at 4:02 PM, Someone here said:

I literally can start screaming and crying like a toddler if I lost my phone ..how is it that you say there are no tangible things we are attached to ?

Assumptions don't need to be experienced in order to be felt.

If you assume there is a bear in your closet, you will feel fear without seeing the bear. 

Emotions and feelings happen now. Concepts and divisions don't. Concepts and divisions point to "not now." But the pointing happens now.

The emotion is how the assumption feels.

There is a symptom (emotions) which is experienced now, but the cause (thoughts) is not actually seen or experienced anywhere.

Similar to mistaking a rope for a snake. Investigating the rope and realizing there is no snake dispels the emotion, because the emotion was equivalent to the belief that there was a snake.

On 7/2/2024 at 4:02 PM, Someone here said:

But I can't stop imagination.

Trying to stop imagination is like trying to stop sight, touch, sound, etc. 

Existence can't stop existence. "Stopping imagination" is a thought about something separate from existence that can control and stop existence.

The belief that you can or can't stop things is imagination. The imagination isn't actually controlling whether you can or can't stop things, because you aren't the separate thing that the imagination is describing. Just because something is being described doesn't mean it actually exists; check your experience to verify this.

Imagination itself is the idea of control, there is no such idea outside of it; it is entirely self-contained. 

Imagination can't stop anything, it can only describe it, but what is described is never seen or experienced.

On 7/2/2024 at 4:02 PM, Someone here said:

Nor is it my actual mindset in life that I have nothing to lose

There is no such thing as a mindset where you have nothing to lose, because a mindset describes things that can be lost. The point is that you can't be described. 

Not losing anything is just the default state of existence when there aren't any beliefs about separation operating.

In the same way how removing your belief about Santa Claus isn't a mindset, there's just nothing left over.

On 7/2/2024 at 4:02 PM, Someone here said:

I'm just trying to help myself and not fool myself with fantastic unrealistic methods of fixing my problems. 

First figure out what the problem actually is before you decide to do anything to it. What is an attachment? Look at it and figure it out. Only when you know what it is, then you can make an informed decision.

Edited by Osaid

Describe a thought.

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The best way to give up attachment is to give it up. Attachments are emotional attachments to some form that you ee identified to. 

I am sure there are states of consciousness that makes it more easier to get detached. But that really is it. Get detached. There is no technique involved.

I recently gave an attachment I had, voluntarily. Simply give up. There isn't anything more here.

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@Bobby_2021 One of my attachments is needing to do things a particular or “right” way. It’s a challenge to actually break those rules I’m attached to, but when I, I realize that my original assumptions were wrong. And that opens up the door, too


I AM false

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18 hours ago, Osaid said:

If you assume there is a bear in your closet, you will feel fear without seeing the bear.

Questioning assumption through direct experience is key.


I AM false

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@Osaid you are so goddamn intelligent. Can't compete with you 😅


my mind is gone to a better place.  I'm elevated ..going out of space . And I'm gone .

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