How do you address the fear of being stuck in a time loop?

[Keryo Koffa]

I had two profound hyper-heroic dose trips in the past year. In the second half of them, I was stuck in a time loop. I could move objects, look at the clock, would get fatigued, return to one spot, realize time had reversed, everything was back to the original configuration and then gradually forget and repeat. I'd get deja vu throughout, only had enough awareness that I was in a loop, but not how to change or end it and would eventually realize that I keep repeating it at the very end becoming restless and then forgetting and starting anew. It made me really paranoid, that I need to change something, or it will keep repeating forever but maybe I thought of that before and it is part of the loop, maybe any action I take is already part of it. My final decision was to accept it and make myself comfortable with waiting it out, and eventually I returned to normal.

But the idea still rings, what do you think, what would you do?

[Rafael Thundercat]

@Keryo Koffa  Jesus, what a trip was this. Thank God I never had one of these. What use to be in a loop? But at least you had escaped it and are back to normality now. Maybe because you got an hyper-heroic dose you end up opening the Hero's Journey Loop Portal and got stuck there for a bit. 

The Hero always return Home.

 

Edited June 20 by Rafael Thundercat

[What Am I]

I experienced something similar many years ago during a high-dose mushroom trip with some friends. This was before I was aware of spirituality, which may have actually worked in my favor in terms of not freaking out as bad since I had no preconceived notions of eternity.

Mine happened in a conversational way. There were four of us. One person would make a statement, which would lead to another person saying something, and then another. Very similar to what you're describing, it kept occurring in some kind of extraordinary loop. Now I realize that sounds mundane, but I assure you something abnormal was occurring and we were all acutely aware, and we were somehow powerless to stop it. The girl in the group actually broke down crying, and still continued to inadvertently play her part in the loop lol. Eventually it wore off and it was like being freed from a trap.

If I were to guess what causes this, it could be the effects of eternity touching our smaller self while that self still has too much control. Like a short-circuiting of our false individuality, which should normally be absent at that level of consciousness.

Edited June 20 by What Am I

[Keryo Koffa]

@What Am I That sounds funny and scary, like being unable to stop laughing even when it starts hurting. That must have been quite the experience, especially since it was a group experience, that must have doubled the impact. Just woah.

Mega doses seem to not only deconstruct reality but also the memory necessary to make sense of a moment to moment experience. The tendency is to deconstruct everything and tune out of sensory awareness. It might lack bandwidth to make sense of the context, leading to singular specific actions, a loop might be the simplest form of understanding unable to go beyond itself.

[Keryo Koffa]

@Rafael Thundercat On the second trip I later experienced an interplay of duality and unity, I guess it makes sense, we explore reality in all its dualities and then dissolve them into non-duality in endless permutations. Although, we do end up bored and then strive for new types of experiences, but I guess the experience was kind of hinting to that, or the stick ego, or the fear of going outside of oneself and making new experiences, or getting lost, or something like that

[Rafael Thundercat]

4 hours ago, What Am I said:

Mine happened in a conversational way. There were four of us. One person would make a statement, which would lead to another person saying something, and then another

It happens all the time here at home. Is called talk flow. One person say something and the other respond and it keep going 

[What Am I]

3 minutes ago, Rafael Thundercat said:

It happens all the time here at home. Is called talk flow. One person say something and the other respond and it keep going 

It's a relief to know I'm not the only one.

[What Am I]

1 hour ago, Keryo Koffa said:

@What Am I That sounds funny and scary, like being unable to stop laughing even when it starts hurting. That must have been quite the experience, especially since it was a group experience, that must have doubled the impact. Just woah.

Yeah, the fact of it being a group experience almost certainly has significance. As if some kind of overarching force entrained all of us at once. Or we somehow initiated it on each other.

[Hojo]

This happened to me after I drink 27 beers in one night. Reality started repeating the same 5 second countless times.

I remeber looking at a girl I was seeing she asked me are you ok? I say no and turn to the garbage and vomit then reality looped back and the girl looks at me asks are you ok? I say no and turn to the garbage and green out over and over.

When this happens after the 1000th time conciousness sees itself and sees what's happening and freaks out. I don't really know how you could know if you are okay with it until its happening.

After the 5 second loop I looped to next 5 seconds where I am puking and I am going down my throat like im in the matrix infinite times.Then I'm in a void of nothing freaking out. Experiencing pure abandonment.

Edited June 20 by Hojo

[LSD-Rumi]

Learn to become more in control while doing trips. Loops happen when your mind is drifting off giving the subconscious mind a greater deal of control, like what happens while dreaming.

[integral]

Why not enjoy yourself instead of fighting it?

[Keryo Koffa]

@integral Back then, I was holding onto existence, it felt like if I blanked out, I may not return or be the same, I also wanted to remember the experience and was highly identified with cognitive understanding. I tried to keep at least rudimentary concepts in tact, like that of passing time or the notion that I'm having an unusual experience but am fine irregardless. Because when all sense of context and identity leaves, I wasn't sure how I would react, if I would get myself into trouble or hurt myself.

It is exactly those experiences that led me to learn that I can integrate understanding from the cognitive layer into a more existential ever present awareness, so that my base state irregardless of experience reacts in a calm, explorative manner. That even if I were to lose all sense of context and identity, I would nonetheless feel in tune with a deeper awareness, a being independent of context. I learn to shift my ideas and identity to a vaster substrate, a more intuitive way of knowing.

And now I wonder if I wound up back in that experience, would my developments skip it entirely, was it a symbolization of that which I am to let go of, would I be able to figure out what that is, would I stand the trial, could I from this vastly disconnected state of being explore reality in a profound fashion, there is a little fear of entering that state again, though I am more prepared now, but I still somewhat fear to lose my sense of self, the profound shift of context, I can deal with gradual change, with voluntary realization and letting go of limitations, but the levels of immediate change were so great, that it felt like I may as well dissipate into thin air, put another person in that place and pretend that's me, it's quite something.

[Keryo Koffa]

@LSD-Rumi If I look back at recordings from past trips, I seemed to be far more in identity, and the experiences were profound due to the releases of limited beliefs they provided. I am much calmer now, more aware of all these aspects of myself. It's quite strange to think about the fact that an important awakening involved the realization of how important "conscious awareness" is, makes me wonder how I was before...