Fasten Your Seatbelt ...

[Shin]

Ok ...

So, this night, I had (2 times) what I would call "The door experiment".
It was such a frightening experience, that even though it happened 3 hours ago, I'm still in fear, I can't sleep or stop thinking about it.

The experience is simply your death, or to be more precise, God that ask you this question:

"ARE YOU READY TO DIE ???!!!"

How does that felt ? Well, it's impossible to communicate, but I'll try.
What's gonna happen, is that you'll sense something coming from your field of awareness, spreading from the inside.

This thing, I would call it "The Infinite Void", will spread, so FUCKING FAST and is so FUCKING PAINFUL, that you'll have only two options:

- Have faith and surrender
- Be so afraid that you would instantly back the fuck off (I "chose" this one without hesitation)

There is no third option, there can't be one, this is so overwhelming and intense that even thinking about your worst experience X infinity isn't even enough to describe it ...

This is heavy shit you're into now, and when you've experienced this, you know it's going to come again, and you also know it can happen at any time ...

This wasn't intentional, It is not like taking some drugs, you don't have any control over it, you don't choose when it happens, and it doesn't give a shit if you're ready or not ...

There is no coming back from this, it can't be unseen, YOU CAN'T GO BACK !

SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT !
 

 

Ahah, you're fucked

 

Edited April 21, 2017 by Shin

[Echoes]

If this void is always there, what is strong enough to supress it most of the time? Just the power of belief?

[Shin]

3 minutes ago, Echoes said:

If this void is always there, what is strong enough to supress it most of the time? Just the power of belief?

I don't know if you can have this for an extended period of time, it may be what is the Dark Night Of The Soul though.

I hope this wasn't a preview for that, I'm quite fucked if it's the case

[Prabhaker]

Just now, Shin said:

it may be what is the Dark Night Of The Soul though

Probably you were entering into 'Dark Night Of The Soul', you missed the opportunity.

[Toby]

Why should the void be painful or be avoided?

@Shin Have fun:

 

Edited April 21, 2017 by Toby

[Shin]

5 minutes ago, Toby said:

Why should the void be painful or be avoided?

Because it is overwhelming and that you still are in the egotic paradigm ?

Of course it's not really pain, and avoidance isn't necessary, but in the moment you don't have time to make a decision, the decision is instantly made.

@Toby TY

 

Edited April 21, 2017 by Shin

[SOUL]

49 minutes ago, Shin said:

I would call it "The Infinite Void"

I have experienced facing this.

One thing to keep in mind, the infinite void is the absence of all things and is eternally devoid...  it's the infinite void.

[Shin]

11 minutes ago, SOUL said:

I have experienced facing this.

One thing to keep in mind, the infinite void is the absence of all things and is eternally devoid...  it's the infinite void.

How many times ? Did you surrender ?

@SOUL Is it just pain being purged, or there is more if you surrender ?

I'm hyped to experience this again and see if I can surrender now, ahah, don't know if it's foolishness or bravery at this point, it feels like I'm going insane

Edited April 21, 2017 by Shin

[SOUL]

1 minute ago, Shin said:

How many times ? Did you surrender ?

Very many times, yes I do surrender.

It's an amazing experience since it is an emulation of infinite consciousness first moment of being.

[Shin]

 

8 hours ago, Maxx said:

So you chose the blue pill. 

But you have been down there Shin, you know that road. You know exactly where it ends. And I know that's not where you wanna be.

@Maxx That's a great analogy btw ^^

Don't worry, I'm already ready to face it again

I'll just meditate untill it happens again, and if I fail, then I'll start all over again.

I will do this untill I finally surrender, it's not like I have a choice anyway, living in fear isn't an option.

 

 

Edited April 21, 2017 by Shin

[Loreena]

Try it again but this time have full faith. 

Fear will keep you away from experiencing it. 

[Bodhi123]

@Shin I respect your dedication. Congratulations on your progress

[FirstglimpseOMG]

Wondering what fears? Also wondering what the fear is of...the ride itself or not coming back? Awesome post.

[Shin]

Ahah, I meditated all the afternoon, and at the end of it, I was like:

 

"I'm ready my dude, I will surrender, see, I want to surrender, so come !

Will you come or not, what the fuck are you waiting for, I'M READY !

JUST FUCKING COME YOU PIECE OF SHIT, FUCKING PUSSY COME TO FIGHT !!!"

 

Couldn't stop laughing, because I was basically talking to myself

EDIT: Also, I was looking at my hand, and it started to get really white and started to vibrated, but that is probably my eyes getting tired of watching ?

@LetTheNewDayBegin What is there to prepare ? How can you prepare this while still being in the egotic paradigm ?

@zazed Well I know these answers, now, do I really know them or is it still concept in my mind, I can't really say.

Edited April 21, 2017 by Shin

[LetTheNewDayBegin]

@Shin You can't just go unprepared and hope for the best next time. Tell me, please. Why are you not ready to die?

--- edit ---

@Shin

Quote

What is there to prepare ? How can you prepare this while still being in the egotic paradigm ?

Maybe you are in egotic paradigm, but you've never left the absolute paradigm either. Remember that the egotic paradigm is imaginary. So don't think that you're in it because that's how you're giving it the power to control you.

Instead... prepare!  Get in touch with your feelings. Shine a light of attention to the darkest places in your heart.

For exmaple, answer yourself: why am I not ready to die? It's ok if "ego" responds. What's important is that you're paying attention (and not running away from the problem).

Edited April 21, 2017 by LetTheNewDayBegin

[zazed]

@Shin fascinating. Thanks for sharing.

who is it that is afraid, and who is it that would die, and who is it that hears the question? these are not all the same who...

[WelcometoReality]

@Shin Now you just need to find the YES to the no. Simple isn't it? ?

[electroBeam]

@Shin This is exactly what one experiences when doing mirror gazing meditation.

I'm 99% sure this is what you call "the dark knight of the soul" sorry dude

I'm not sure on how to solve it bcos im a pussy like you but I asked Leo on how to make the jump and this is what his reply was:

<after asking him on how to eliminate the fear of losing you and your world>: