I eat healthily, but I'm a heavy smoker.

[Husseinisdoingfine]

For someone in college, I eat surprisingly healthy. Almost every other day, I prepare for myself a spinach anti-oxidant health smoothie. And I exercise at least four times a week.

But while I was in college, I picked up my smoking habit again.

My smoking habit began when I was 17 years old in high school. A friend invited me to the back of the bleachers, where he showed me his pack of Newport Menthol 100's. That's where it all started.

I was able to quit no problem, but picked up the habit again a few times. I remember when I was 19, my family took me on a holiday to Costa Rica, where the smoking age is only 18. I bought a pack of Marlboro Reds, but threw it away because it was too strong. Went back to the convenience store and bought a back of Lucky Strike activate greens, loved it. 

Two years ago, I bought a pack of Marlboro Golds on a family trip to Portugal, and that was my last pack of cigarettes for some two years. 

I just two days ago smoked my last pack of Marlboro Reds, loved it. But I need to stop. When I resumed the habit some 7 weeks ago, I told myself that I was going to be in control, but then one pack a week turned into two packs a week. The prior mentioned Marlboro Reds only took me 3 days to finish.

I've decided now to quit smoking, but to what extent should I?

I don't want to completely give up cigarettes, as I love the warm tobacco sensation, or cooling if I'm smoking menthol, and the calming effect (the nicotine buzz) of the cigarette. Instead of a daily smoker, maybe I can convert to being a social smoker?

Its an excellent way to relax, which is exactly the problem.

When in college, I would immediately and automatically reach for the cigarette to stop the anxiety. Whenever the anxiety became too much, too overwhelming, the first thing was to reach for the cigarette. This as well applied to other mental ailments. I was formerly diagnosed with anxiety and OCD, OCD for which I do take medication for. When the OCD thought loops became too much to bear, when its causing me too much suffering and anger, the first instinct is to reach for the cigarette. 

The OCD thought loops would often produce a sever tension in my head, as the same obsessive compulsive and angering thoughts replay for the hundredth or thousandth time (I'm not exaggerating). The result would be a painful sensation in my head. In order to alleviate this, I would engage in some sort of ritual, usually repeating things out loud to my self. This has been going on since I was a small child.

Smoking is one of the only ways to end this.

I explicitly remember Osho talking about that chain smoking (which is what I have been doing) is only possible for deeply anxiety ridden people, and I have been formally diagnose with anxiety and OCD, and take medication for OCD. 

Should I completely and 100% stop smoking, or maybe I can only do it when I'm with friends or on special occasion? I want to drop being a daily chain smoker, because I don't want to develop breathing issues or for my skin to age.

Edited June 13 by Husseinisdoingfine
grammar corrections

[Schizophonia]

You’re tacitly asking for our authorisation lol.

You do what you want of your life, if you want avoid toxicity of cigarettes just donc smoke or keep smoking for special events.

There are also better brands of cigarettes, some added products can drastically prevent the lungs of absorbing combustions products, and the accumulation increases toxicity a lot, obviously.

Unless you reach a certain level of consumption, the majority of carbon monoxide and fine particles come from food or environmental pollution.
 

Health is an very holistic thing, very very holistic.

Edited June 13 by Schizophonia

[Michael569]

Alan Watts was an alcoholic, maybe you should try a bottle of absynth a day, see what happens. 

Are you asking our permission so you can continue pissing on your health? Then maybe allow the rest of us to piss on it as well?

I think you probably know all the answers already, you need not ask

🙏 be well 🙏

 

Edited June 13 by Michael569

[undeather]

Quote

I don't want to completely give up cigarettes, as I love the warm tobacco sensation, or cooling if I'm smoking menthol, and the calming effect (the nicotine buzz) of the cigarette. Instead of a daily smoker, maybe I can convert to being a social smoker?

That's your addiction speaking. Look how you are desperately trying to look for reasons to keep that behaviour alive. 
Every smoker loves the sensations tabacco gives them, that's why they do it.

I work at a Gastrointestinal-clinic, which also includes liver-patients - most of them due to alcohol. 
While the poison is a different one, the excuses are the same. "What if I just drink at parties?" - "But I like the easiness alcohol gives me in social situations" - "It helps with bearing life" ...

I think the right way for you is to stop completely and look for healthier mechanisms to deal with said mental issues. 
Your future self will thank you for it. 
 

[ZenAlex]

Stop smoking completely. Just do it for 6 months and see what happens.

[MarkKol]

Probably taking a decade off your life, likely even more. My guess is around ~ 13 years