Triggered into humiliation from a girl

[fopylo]

So I'm quite a socially anxious guy, and have had it for most of my life.

Lately I've been working on it and trying to be more social, but I don't know why, every time I'm in this office room only with this one girl (or plus a friend of hers) it's always super awkward for me and I just want to disappear in this moment.

Perhaps because of my anxiousness she tries deliberately to trigger me, but not in a bullying way, just teasing me as if I'm a child (like staring at me until I notice, try blocking my way, say 'shut up' or other mean things but in a playful way I guess). The humiliation is so disturbing that I become even more uneasy (more cold, unemotional, hiding) and I don't know what's the next thing I'll say and how I'll get myself out of the situation. It feels like a fight-or-flight for real.

Today there was a moment that she showed me her hair clip, and I was so awkward, and she eventually put it on and I was like 'it isn't really seen though' (it was) and then she asked "it's beautiful, right?" and I was so anxious and I said in such a pussy tone "It is cool". I beat myself so bad for that. But I also still had to survive the rest of the day their. She chuckled and left. I had a feeling she would tell her friends about that.

I don't think this is some kind of way of showing attraction, because I don't have status and confidence. Just a relatively good body, which I know doesn't mean shit to a woman.

I'm not trying to hit on her. I'm just awkward and trying to play a role. Damn.

I'd really love to hear your thoughts about this.

 

[LambdaDelta]

In my opinion, if you only wish to ease your social anxiety and not trying to do pickup, start treating her like you would any other person, ie other guys. And I don't mean talking about football and beer, but maintain the same attitude as with everyone else. The fact that she's a girl should change nothing. As someone who has zero interest in dating and the like, that's how I approach all my interactions, and I believe in many cases women actually appreciate this, being treated like a human being without some underlying sexual motives or subtle games being played.
Also don't be too hard on yourself, we can't always be at our best. And maybe teasing is just part of her personality, not to do with you in particular. If you don't feel like playing along, then simply don't. I take it this is a work situation? Otherwise if you're not stuck there it might be much simpler to just find someone else to interact with, can't vibe with everyone and that's ok. 

[Atb210201]

@fopylo The question is are you attracted to her or not?

I'm thinking you are by the way you have written your words here

And it's okay if you want to hit on her do it

But also I would say is to not let her treat you badly if you don't like the way she treats you

That's it

[Raze]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89bpvKQvsiA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cOkQ1YrXN7Y