How can I pursue Spirituality and get Shit Done?

[Davino]

It has come a time where I must face this truth: Spirituality makes me unproductive. I need to make things work out in my life and I am in a phase where that's what I must do and what reality demands of me, yet all I truly want is God-Realization, Mysticism and Philosophy.

That has been my eternal struggle in my life, again and again I want to pursue Truth and transhuman consciousness but my regular human life doesn't allow me to. And I get into these cycles of extreme productivity and extreme transcendentalism and I'm never able to actually make peace with any of these and once for all live in a mature way; so I end up not doing any as I would like to. Because I just don't really enjoy the whole human survival game, it's not for me, I want the most profound peaks of consciousness and that's what I have loved doing since I was a child, that's what makes me thrive, what makes me wanna live and what wakes me up every morning. But that's unrealistic and I know it, reality reminds me again and again, and it crushes my soul again and again, having to do shit I hate to survive, I feel alienated and still don't see a way to bridge and unite. I strongly desire integration.

I want to be a mature human being with a strong work ethic that is realistic and executes what needs to be done. Because my human happiness depends on that. The point is both options make me unhappy but one is the pain that grows me and the other is the pain of my own immaturity. In fact, If I'm truly honest with myself I know that I should forget spirituality for some good years, because I'm way too advanced in it, and focus on bulding a solid personal life, but does that fulfill me in the same way? hell no. I just find myself year after year forced to build structure for some hypothetical day where I can finally live the life I want, but meanwhile my soul is raped and this intern schism inside me continues...

This shit is really killing me... I see no way out

 

It's not that my life is falling apart, it's that I honestly struggle with the human condition despite doing fairly good in life. I know I just have to swallow the pill but I don't know why I can't. I really don't know why I can't integrate myself and wise up, yet it's all I want; peace in myself.

Edited June 3 by Davino

[Javfly33]

Get the same shit done you want to get done but working on 'your spirituality' at the same time.

Meditation psychedelics yoga...etc this are internal tools where obviously being in silence one can go the most deep but one can also work on his path while engaging actively in life. 

You can absolutely work on the field and work on yourself. 

Is not that when you go do humane shit you disappear. The human body and mind is only there because you are there. Giving it Life and Intelligence. 

So wherever you are you can exercise the skill of going deeper within yourself. 

IMO, is a complete myth that spirituality will damage your productivity.

(Of course, if you want the Peak of the peak, then there is no other way but to seclude oneself in the mountains, but until that moment comes, there´s a lot of progress one can do while engaging in normal human activities  (They can be your ladder, not a limitation. )

In summary, advancing in your spirituality should mean that you are able to do the same job in a more peaceful, intelligent, profound and effortless way than a human that has not worked in his spirituality. 

Edited June 3 by Javfly33

[LambdaDelta]

Many here are likely in the same boat, myself included. I've given it some thought, but no concrete answers so far. The idea of holding out till you can reach a certain financial goal or whatever doesn't seem right. Most likely you'd be miserable along the way, and it's necessary to learn to enjoy the process, which'll also bring about better and faster results. I'm contemplating how to make the survival process more fun. One avenue could be to apply semi-spiritual knowledge and practices to it - spiral/ego development, intuition, mindfullness, various psychological lenses, etc. and see what kind of results you get. That way it's more like a game. Ideally survival should end up running itself, with you paying minimal attention. That alone is very difficult to achieve, but also rewarding if one can learn to appreciate the work and intelligence that goes into it. 
Perhaps you do need to quit spirituality cold turkey for a time. Pursuing extremely high consciousness states is almost like 'chasing the dragon' on heroin, the deeper you go the worse the withdrawals will get. Consider doing a trip where you specifically ask yourself "How am I not appreciating the beauty of earthly life?". Look up evidence that there is in fact a lot of beauty and intelligence in it, even in the stupid and boring stuff.
Personally I'm thinking I need a radical shift to shake things up, a shock to the senses. One of my problems is my life is too comfortable for my own good, maybe you can relate. Something like locking up a major portion of my savings somewhere inaccessible s.t. pressing survival concerns will force me to act, or else. The issue is my self-awareness is too advanced, which's a double-edged sword. On the one hand it's helpful, but since it all passes through an ego structure, it may also get co-opted to keep me in homeostatis. Hard to trick yourself into doing something once you know it's a trick and how it works. It's a constant struggle with yourself, an inner jihad. This spirituality stuff really is a one-way ticket, huh? Once seen it cannot be unseen, for better or worse.
Anyhoo that's some of my ramblings, hopefully somewhat useful. 

Edited June 3 by LambdaDelta

[Fountainbleu]

Just lessen your spirituality practices. That's what i did. I've grown so much since doing that, in the horizontal, and at the same time feel just as spiritual or more. I feel like I've gone full circle. The yin and the yang. 

[Davino]

@Javfly33 I'll make a shift to a more horizontal spirituality because I cannot keep my approach and handle a regular life. For me spirituality is all about blowing the limits of my consciousness into higher consciousness. Doesn't matter the practice, I do it with a lot of intensity till the breakthrough.

A more stable horizontal path would allow me to be more grounded and mindful. While being fairly satisfied. Thanks for the advice, those are good ways for integration.

[Davino]

@Fountainbleu how was that transition? What made you take such decision? 

[Davino]

@LambdaDelta I can relate brother. Thanks for sharing, it makes me feel better knowing that is a common struggle.

[TrevorEmdon]

Hey Davino,

I'm new around here, (but not to conversations like these), and your post made me curious.  Mostly what I don't get is why "the human survival game" and what you call "the most profound peaks of consciousness" are mutually exclusive.

I don't know what you do or how you'd define "profound peaks of consciousness," but I am reminded of the Zen koan which translates something like, "Before enlightenment, carrying water, chopping wood.  After enlightenment, carrying water, chopping wood."

Does that resonate at all?

 

[Clarence]

@Davino I have a similar struggle… it's really hard to build interest and work ethics for the most human aspects of life when consciousness work is so fascinating. I haven't found a solution for this yet either.

But what I think would be of much help for me would be to go from a state of survival and dissonance to a state of flow and alignment with aspects of myself I'm not enough in touch with (like higher self, intuition, expansion… in the daily human life). That's currently what I am working on. I would also place my focus first on passion and joy - doing and going for things that I like and that I think would bring me joy, rather than on work and things that I don't really want to do but feel like I should be doing. So my focus is on finding interests again in human aspects of life, even if those are not bringing me money, for example. I think that those two aspects could improve daily human life a lot and they do not exclude going for peak experiences. There is not really a choice in the end but to find a way to combine the two in the best way we can. And the alignment and joy could help a lot to think and feel better about living as a human.

So maybe focusing only on the work you should be doing to improve the human aspects of life is not inspiring enough. You might need a different approach or way of living life that doesn't exactly include that right now but which could still make you grow and lead you towards a beautiful and rewarding life (and out of this painful in-between in which you feel stuck).

From reading you, I don't think you could completely put aside spirituality for some years to build an infrastructure, but reducing the time you spend into spirituality for a while to create a new balance of the two could be a possibility. What do you think about that? Could it help you change things around in your mind? Would thinking about doing it that way crush your soul all as much?

I still have a lot of reflexions to do on that topic as well because it is a serious concern. It's quite a relief to know that others are struggling with that too.

5 hours ago, LambdaDelta said:

Consider doing a trip where you specifically ask yourself "How am I not appreciating the beauty of earthly life?". 

I agree with @LambdaDelta. Have you tried that already? I had amazing results once with psilocybin so I believe it can be very beneficial.

[Nilsi]

6 hours ago, Davino said:

That has been my eternal struggle in my life, again and again I want to pursue Truth and transhuman consciousness but my regular human life doesn't allow me to. And I get into these cycles of extreme productivity and extreme transcendentalism and I'm never able to actually make peace with any of these and once for all live in a mature way; so I end up not doing any as I would like to. Because I just don't really enjoy the whole human survival game, it's not for me, I want the most profound peaks of consciousness and that's what I have loved doing since I was a child, that's what makes me thrive, what makes me wanna live and what wakes me up every morning. But that's unrealistic and I know it, reality reminds me again and again, and it crushes my soul again and again, having to do shit I hate to survive, I feel alienated and still don't see a way to bridge and unite. I strongly desire integration.

you just answered your own question. if you have some kind of gnostic ideal of spirituality, human problems and life will slip through your fingers, as you grasp for the "transcendent."

this is also an issue with most traditional spirituality, where the immanent aspects of god are often neglected, or downright rejected as heresy, as is the case in mainstream islam.

if you want to get shit done, you have to be able to see god not only in the beyond, but also in the muck of "mundane" existence.

i'm always reminded of the opening lyrics to george clinton's classic ode to transcendence, "maggot brain," when contemplating this issue:

Quote

Mother Earth is pregnant for the third time
For y'all have knocked her up
I have tasted the maggots in the mind of the universe
I was not offended
For I knew I had to rise above it all
Or drown in my own shit 

 

take your psychedelics and jam out to some funkadelic from time to time, but don't get too hung up on it, is what i would suggest.

if seeking non-ordinary states of consciousness is what you truly feel called to, i won't be able to persuade you otherwise anyway - and i wouldn't want to either. but there are also plenty of amazing experiences available that don't require rejecting your humanity - being human may even be the pre-condition for those... so there's that.

Edited June 3 by Nilsi

[Fountainbleu]

5 hours ago, Davino said:

@Fountainbleu how was that transition? What made you take such decision? 

Try and find out. You have all the answers my friend. 

[mmKay]

What does pursuing spirituallity mean to you? 

What do you exactly mean with getting shit done?

[Davino]

@TrevorEmdon Hi my friend, welcome to the forum.

3 hours ago, TrevorEmdon said:

Mostly what I don't get is why "the human survival game" and what you call "the most profound peaks of consciousness" are mutually exclusive.

I don't say they are mutually exclusive for everybody but I still haven't figured out how to balance them in my life. I guess this will be a pretty common problem for other people too. why? because its' very difficult to experience transhuman levels of consciousness and then take seriously the human game, no, the spell has been broken but you still have to play the game.

3 hours ago, TrevorEmdon said:

I don't know what you do or how you'd define "profound peaks of consciousness," but I am reminded of the Zen koan which translates something like, "Before enlightenment, carrying water, chopping wood.  After enlightenment, carrying water, chopping wood."

Does that resonate at all?

No, not at all. The way I pursue spirituality cannot fit into that paradigm. You cannot live in the states of consciousness I'm talking about, you can't move or talk, you can barely sit straight and even taking the next breath is an adventure, a conscious decision that rests on your will.

 

[Davino]

@Clarence I see the beauty in human life, the problem is that I'm stuck in a very demanding scenario which asks me to do daily things which I'm not interested in at all. I have at least 1 year more to go about this and have been 4 years in this situation. I'm simulatenously studying two engineering degrees which I thought I would like but I don't, and I thought it would get better with time but it just got worse and I now must finish.

I really do think that when I'm able to complete my university studies next year I'll have some hope to make peace in myself. However till that happens, I think I'll just have to suffer through it, i've tried everything for these years and still haven't been able to reconcile it. My only hope is to find a job that is aligned with my values and that I enjoy doing, have the classical job experience for some good years, make a financial cushion for my girlfriend and me to then start my own bussiness.

So yeah if this a lesson, make sure you pick properly your major and don't hesitate to change if you are not feeling good, it won't go any better with the years.

[Davino]

5 hours ago, Nilsi said:

this is also an issue with most traditional spirituality, where the immanent aspects of god are often neglected, or downright rejected as heresy, as is the case in mainstream islam.

if you want to get shit done, you have to be able to see god not only in the beyond, but also in the muck of "mundane" existence.

Once you get transcendent enough, the transcendence ends up kissing itself in the ass and totally merging back again with the now experience, in the most strange loop way you can't imagine

I see beauty and divinity everywhere that's precisely why I want to exalt it and make it my life's meaning. Surviving is often an obstacle for this maximization of consciousness and meaning that I feel spontaneously motivated to flow in. It is precisely because I love my mundane life that I can't stand the way I'm living to make ends meet, not because it's bad, but because how good I know it can be.

5 hours ago, Nilsi said:

 

 

I can't express in words how much I enjoyed listening to this masterpiece. You gifted me a precious moment, I'll check more songs of this kind. Thanks

 

 

[Davino]

3 hours ago, mmKay said:

What does pursuing spirituality mean to you? 

Becoming as Conscious and as Godly as I can.

3 hours ago, mmKay said:

What do you exactly mean with getting shit done?

The art of doing what you hate to do but need to do, as if you loved it.

[BipolarGrowth]

How old are you?

Do you live with your parents? 

Are you 100% responsible for your own living expenses?

Do you have much ambition? 

 

Productivity and getting shit done essentially fell into place for me out of necessity. I can’t well tolerate myself being a completely worthless loser for long. I spent about a year doing that. I was off work for most of that year span and had hundreds of awakening experiences which permanently leveled up the potency of my direct experience. Still, after a year of doing that, bills started to pile up, and I also begun to get a bit bored of only doing spiritual stuff. 
 

When you awaken deeply enough, spirituality becomes boring. You see through the game for what it is. Still, it’s more interesting than everything else, so there’s no need to stop. There’s also no need to try to get somewhere else. You never get somewhere else. 
 

Integrating spirituality with normal life is a task that can be worked on and perfected as long as you like. Engage with both worlds, and immerse yourself deeper in each until they fuse into one. 

Edited June 4 by BipolarGrowth

[mmKay]

11 hours ago, Davino said:

Becoming as Conscious and as Godly as I can.h

The art of doing what you hate to do but need to do, as if you loved it.

Okay, but what are you talking about in concrete, tangible terms? This is still very vague, which seems to be part of the problem holding us back from giving proper answers 

Vague questions get vague answers

[Clarence]

@Davino I understand how that can feel. I am in a situation I really hate and still have to go through it. It's really hard.

What I meant with the psilocybin trip I had is that I discovered peace in being in that situation, in doing things I didn't like or didn't want to do. I felt peace even though the situation hadn't change. Everything then was made much easier. Unfortunately it was not a miracle cure as after a week, the magic stopped (maybe my brain chemistry was better during that week and that must have helped). I couldn't reproduce that state again - also I only had one other chance to take psilocybin after that, but I still hold this memory as a reminder that the situation would be different if my state/outlook/feeling about it was different. So now I try to change my state and mindset with other methods as I think it would be of much help.

I feel that having such a switch in your mind could help you too. Can't you think about some method you haven't tried that could maybe help?

Also, do you even still want to work in the engineering field? If not… can't you stop the studies and start working right now in a sector that would feel better for you until you start your own business - if that's what you ultimately want?

[enchanted]

On 6/3/2024 at 7:10 AM, Davino said:

It has come a time where I must face this truth: Spirituality makes me unproductive. I need to make things work out in my life and I am in a phase where that's what I must do and what reality demands of me, yet all I truly want is God-Realization, Mysticism and Philosophy.

That has been my eternal struggle in my life, again and again I want to pursue Truth and transhuman consciousness but my regular human life doesn't allow me to. And I get into these cycles of extreme productivity and extreme transcendentalism and I'm never able to actually make peace with any of these and once for all live in a mature way; so I end up not doing any as I would like to. Because I just don't really enjoy the whole human survival game, it's not for me, I want the most profound peaks of consciousness and that's what I have loved doing since I was a child, that's what makes me thrive, what makes me wanna live and what wakes me up every morning. But that's unrealistic and I know it, reality reminds me again and again, and it crushes my soul again and again, having to do shit I hate to survive, I feel alienated and still don't see a way to bridge and unite. I strongly desire integration.

I want to be a mature human being with a strong work ethic that is realistic and executes what needs to be done. Because my human happiness depends on that. The point is both options make me unhappy but one is the pain that grows me and the other is the pain of my own immaturity. In fact, If I'm truly honest with myself I know that I should forget spirituality for some good years, because I'm way too advanced in it, and focus on bulding a solid personal life, but does that fulfill me in the same way? hell no. I just find myself year after year forced to build structure for some hypothetical day where I can finally live the life I want, but meanwhile my soul is raped and this intern schism inside me continues...

This shit is really killing me... I see no way out

It's not that my life is falling apart, it's that I honestly struggle with the human condition despite doing fairly good in life. I know I just have to swallow the pill but I don't know why I can't. I really don't know why I can't integrate myself and wise up, yet it's all I want; peace in myself.

Judging by your posts it's clear you have a gift in the spiritual domain. Your passion, knowledge, and skills comes through in your words. 

My advice is set high sights for yourself. Don't get bogged down in something petty just to survive. Get creative, use your obvious skill to find something very profound and rewarding to do in the world. Your options are truly infinite.

I suspect we will be seeing great things from you in the near future.