Struggling to Understand Others after Waking Up

[ivarmaya]

Hi all,

Over the past 18 months, I've had a series of awakenings and now struggle to remember how I experienced life and reality before. Sometimes, I can't imagine how people experience reality, how they are not construct-aware, and how they don't get any of this, especially those studying Leo's teachings or similar. Even Curt Jaimungal doesn’t get it.

The problem is that I have a hard time relating to others or understanding how they think.

Is this common? Any tips on how to bridge this gap? I understand Ralston has a similar problem.

Love you all.

Thanks!

[Atb210201]

@ivarmaya Hi my friend

If you want to relate to others you have to get into their world

And if you think the person you are talking to gets your points about these subjects then proceed to talk about it with them, and if not then don't they won't get it anyway it's not their time yet

[Exystem]

What helped me to bridge part of the gap is trying to see everyone as an amplyfying mirror. All of that is some kind of self-sabotage, ignorance or incapability - if these aren't three sides of the same coin.

I oftentimes talk to christians (fundamentalists) and it is funny how convinced they are that this cannot ever be a dream, that they absolutely know it is real and stuff like that. They can't even imagine it. They continiously respond with stuff like "but I can't grab through this wall" as if they could always grab through walls in their dreams.

What has become important to me is open my heart at that moment. It is not about them getting something, it is about my reaction to it. We all bullshit ourselves, run away from shit and ignoring the obvious. I do it, you probably do it too in some areas of your life. Try to see the mechanism behind the ignorance/self-sabotage. Look where it applies to you. See that some years ago you were in the same boat. What others need is not your knowledge/an arrogance of words, it's love.

Another tip: Start speaking more in a coaching style than like a therapist. It's natural to want to heal the ignorance condition fast, but oftentimes that becomes the problem. Don't try to explain too much, people may even start believing you without really understanding. The school system and other cultural conditioning made lots of people lose the capability to think for themselves and derive at answers by using their own intuition and intellect. Don't school them! Ask them wise questions so they can find the answer themselves. See it as a refinement of your skill, again it is not about them but about you. Do it Sokrates-style. A smart man is he who has the right answers - a wise man is he who has the right questions. Develop your wisdom, coach people into the depths of their heart and intelligence. Help them seeing through their bullshit by being aware of your own.

When you ask the right questions, you will be able to relate much better (I hope).
Good luck!

Great question btw

 

[Leo Gura]

This just means that you were probably already fairly spiritually talented and saw the world in a more advanced way than most people.

If you could easily relate with normies you probably would have not woken up so easily. That's the tradeoff.

[Water by the River]

6 hours ago, ivarmaya said:

Sometimes, I can't imagine how people experience reality, how they are not construct-aware, and how they don't get any of this, especially those studying Leo's teachings or similar. Even Curt Jaimungal doesn’t get it.

The problem is that I have a hard time relating to others or understanding how they think.

Is this common? Any tips on how to bridge this gap? I understand Ralston has a similar problem.

Compassion. Less construct-awareness and generally lower level of for example growth on the Spiral Dynamics spectrum equals more suffering. Beings less aware/consciousness generally suffer more. Way more. Because they are more hypotized by their constructs/world-views, and reject many more situations appearing in their mindstream than for example someone on 2nd-tier SD.

That is why stable Awakening needs compassion towards them (because if one doesn't have it, one will suffer/get angry/whatever oneself, and bye bye nondual awakened states). That is btw not new-agey-talk, but a "hard" fact/reality. Nothing easier to kill ones nice off-the-pillow-awakened nondual state than getting annoyed. Took me a loooong time to get it.

Wisdom (or Awakening) and compassion (openness,love,bliss) form a pair in Mahayana-Buddhism. Because they got this around 2 milleania ago:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bodhisattva

And even from a metaphysical perspective it makes sense: If True You is all of already (which it is), if one walks around disliking certain aspects of oneself ("others") because they "lack" development, one cuts nondualty in two, shutting off awakened nondual states.-Literally.

It is not a sin of the acorn to be not yet an oak.

And one more perspective: Consider the stupidity less-than-wise/smart-behaviour of the whole world as divine entertainment. True You is playing a trick on itself. Better be the one laughing in a compassionate way and not the one being annoyed. But that has also to be balanced with compassion in order to not become cynical or negative. 

Certain local VIPs  that yours truly is very fond of seem to be truly getting this now. Chapeau!

 

Selling Water while swimming in the River & humming along:

 

Edited June 1, 2024 by Water by the River

[Salvijus]

To understand others you have to understand yourself first. 

If you don't understand others, then it may be a sign your level of understanding is not as profound as you may thought. 

If the progress is genuine, the ability to understand others would increase as you grow, not decrease. 

Edited June 1, 2024 by Salvijus

[UnbornTao]

Remember? What do you mean?

Quote

"The problem is that I have a hard time relating to others or understanding how they think."

I'd say this isn't exclusive to enlightenment, in fact it may be a common phenomenon. Regarding advice, you can meet them where they are. If you've had genuine enlightenments, you may be facilitated in contemplating their experience, and perhaps communicating yours better. This is about communication.

Edited June 1, 2024 by UnbornTao

[Yimpa]

Instead of trying to relate with normies, just…

[Breakingthewall]

Avoid the intellectual and try to connect. In essence, you and others are the same. relating and communicating is not sharing ideas, you can relate to a cat for example

Ultimately, the intellect is false in the sense that is just a construction, only the essence is the truth. Try to see and touch the truth in the others, truth is everywhere, because everything is the truth. 

Edited June 1, 2024 by Breakingthewall

[gettoefl]

awake is the most logical obvious simple thing ever

if you think another isn't awake, this means you aren't - since you don't know how others are and you can't engage them with the simple truth

others are you that you put there to chat with so you could deepen your understanding

their dumbness is you not having put the pieces together properly

you set this up for your awakening and nothing else

try to put them together again

 

Edited June 2, 2024 by gettoefl