How Do I Figure Out My Future Path in a Short Period of Time?

[Oso]

I've just finished my second year of general community college, turned 20 last week, and don't know what I want to do with my career path next. 

I'm finding great trouble committing to anything unless someone else directs me towards it or forces me into it.

 

The options I see are college, a trade, or a full time job. These are also being enforced upon me lest I wish to have my transportation, housing, and food taken away at some degree from my parents. 

 

I need to choose something but it feels like a brain fuck every time I try and think about what to choose. I don't have any polished skills yet but I enjoy and am decent at producing music, researching and analyzing, listening, working out and training, and some other small things.

 

All of these things feel lukewarm for me with music production being the most viable option, speaking on behalf of passion. Though I still feel left in the dust with all of these and that going into a university dedicated down one of the paths is just a means for me to end up with a shitty or no degree and debt. I can't do that but I need to decide on something within the next month or so. I just don't how to choose with such a neutral passion and no crazy drive in one specific thing.

 

Any help? 

[Tboy]

Yeah I would think about this a good amount, you don't want to make a rash decision. 

You need to understand what you want in life and why. I would say start doing the life purpose course and get yourself through all the values exercises - for me they were very very hard but I couldn't be more thankful for them because they basically hold your hand through the process of working out what is most important for you in life. The exercises don't tell you what to want, they push you to define exactly what that is for you and to prioritise it. 

 

That I think would be the best approach - I also would encourage you to not beat yourself up, be kind to yourself through the whole process, at every stage be gentle and kind but on the other hand you have to take responsibility for this because no-one is going to do it for you.

[Phil King]

On 5/13/2024 at 3:42 PM, Oso said:

I just don't how to choose with such a neutral passion and no crazy drive in one specific thing.

The book "So Good They Cant Ignore You" By Cal Newport might help. In short, the book makes the claim that you shouldnt go for a career based on your current passions, but rather that you develop passion for your work by becoming world class in a field that you feel has a positive impact on humanity. 

The life purpose course is always a great start. Another good exercise is just literally stare at a wall with nothing but a journal for hours/days and just write down what you want from your life in terms of material possesions, ideal lifestyle, bucket list experiences, skills you want to develop, dream career or potential careers. The first hour, you'll probably just end up listing basic stuff like a lamborghini and a shit ton of money and girls, but if you stick with the question "What do I really want out of my life" for long enough, youll eventually get to the core of what your authentic self wants. 

 

Edited May 15 by Phil King

[Oso]

@Tboy So you're encouraging me to just do the value assessments from the course? I've done them twice or so before some year ago, and never was able to get super clear. I definitely found that which I valued, but in regards to having direction and purpose, they were only helpers and not the purpose itself, at least related to career. I understand now that no-one is going to do it for me, and it makes me scared. Though, I always cycle back to this same feeling where "If I just had a drive to do one thing, it wouldn't be so hard." and I don't know how that makes me feel anymore.

On 5/13/2024 at 3:40 PM, Tboy said:

 

 

[Oso]

@Phil King I understand where Cal is coming from wherein one gets masterful at their work and contentment follows, though, it is that same problem again of what work? I don't want to be a master in just anything. I want to be a master in something in value and in which I can give with. In that regard to Cal, I agree, it's just I feel I must do it in a specific line of work which I have been greatly struggling to find. 

Once again, I shall review the course just as @Tboy recommended. Beyond this, I have done the blank wall exercise once and managed to get through a few hours of it. Though, not to much avail as I wasn't really picking apart what I wanted at the deepest level. I was more so thinking about career and money so more shallow. I might consider doing it again.  

[Basman]

It is a process to figure out what you want which will take years from knowing vaguely what you want to refining it and acing it. 

You have to explore different options and gain experience. Just don't get bogged down with a particular choice. Young people tend to think that a choice is make or break but you can move on from a decision and try different things as long as you avoid getting bogged down with a bunch of commitments.

Ditto on reviewing the LP course since it seems you already bought it.

[Oso]

@Basman How do I avoid getting bogged down with a particular choice? That is a trap I would like to be conscious enough ahead of time. Maybe just some foresight so I don't get comfortable and ignorant. For the most part, I'm only making commitments in my life that are related to whatever my future career might be. Until then, I feel I can't really commit to anything crazy like a serious relationship, a big financial burden, etc... 

Okay on the course. I'll be re-watching and reworking the values section soon alongside anything else that should strike some interest or importance.