Swinging until suicide

[gettoefl]

hang in there thierry, you are a beautiful man and trust me that you are adding tons to this world simply by being you

no one else brings your gift

i do not know you well but i do know that i love you and urge you to make full use of this incarnation

pop me a message if you wish

[Princess Arabia]

10 minutes ago, gettoefl said:

hang in there thierry, you are a beautiful man and trust me that you are adding tons to this world simply by being you

no one else brings your gift

i do not know you well but i do know that i love you and urge you to make full use of this incarnation

pop me a message if you wish

Beautiful! Thanks for being you. 

[gettoefl]

17 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

Beautiful! Thanks for being you. 

and you too precious woman ♥

[Kimmi]

You'll get through it. 

[numbersinarow]

I could be wrong but it sounds like you COULD live despite the damage to your body if you chose to.

[Pox]

lol this reminds me of that turkey tom death cult vid... I've done shrooms twice and the second time i did it, i had an ego death. It was probably the most traumatic experience i've ever had in my life, so i can see where youre coming from. Mental ilness + psychedelics is not a good combination man...

[Soul Flight]

@Bandman I will pray for you. Text 988 or call 988 to get some feedback. Hang in there. Message me if you would like.

[thierry]

Thanks for all the lovely messages, I read them all, just came back from an intense trip on lsd, I feel good.

[StarStruck]

You are already dying every second. From reading your thread it seems you have a lot of wrong conceptions about things. You don’t need to physically die if you mentally die and let go of all the crap you conjured during your stupid ass psychedelic trips. Psychedelics can create spiritual ego. Perhaps it is wise to put that on hold. 

Edited May 16 by StarStruck

[MAHAVATAR_-_BABAJI]

On 4/27/2024 at 11:24 PM, thierry said:

Before judging this thread being irresponsible or and immature. Take a moment to really understand my project: 

basically I fucked up in this life. 
I had trouble from 14 to 18 and ended up with fatigue chronic and bipolar disorder but I did well att school because I put all my eggs into studying. Anyway after when a gf entered my life the first time, that s here I understood how fucked up I was. I squander the relationship from a to z. The girl was totally in Love with me. It was easier to not screw than to screw but I like challenges! 
anyway I was very serious prepararing ingenireeng school and made lots of sports from 19 to 22 but at 22 I discoverd Leo so of course at 23 I started my psychedelics journey or should I say my shroom journey.  One year was enough to put me into psych ward were my body mind has been forsaken forever. I’ve been in a very very very dark place for 4years. But enough is enough, I won’t carry all that unconsciousness/ shiet my all life. I wanna die with a mignimum of dignity and the more I wait the more my dignity decrease. Anyway, I ll find a way to kill myself and to know what there is after you kill yourself !! I’m so excited for this adventure. Sorry for the excitements of this post I took to many xanax before writing. That shit is gooooood. I hope some people will understand that this surfing ntil suicide attitude is my best possible attitude regarding now. I have nothing to bring to anyone, I am a leash to my wonderful family. I just can’t wait to put a bullet between my two eyes.

plz don’t judge. It’s actually a very serious topic. I don’t recommand that to anyone unless you are in a similar situation where you are carrying an enormous amount of shiets.

I’ll of course write loving letters to all people I love and once I will become a demon if god does not let me pass to Heaven I’ll send all that touch my family in hell. 
kiss kiss

That's crazy how they didn't delete this. When I'd post intoxicated I'd get banned and deleted. 

 

I feel your pain. I still want to kill myself  I'd love to dm you and speak further on what you are going through. Just know you are not alone in this. I'd love to explain the hell I've gone through and solutions I've found and thresholds I've placed on such feelings using certain protocols.

I hope you PM me I'm open for chatting. And yes, I still feel the way you feel. Stay safe 🖤

 

 

[MAHAVATAR_-_BABAJI]

On 5/16/2024 at 3:30 PM, StarStruck said:

You are already dying every second. From reading your thread it seems you have a lot of wrong conceptions about things. You don’t need to physically die if you mentally die and let go of all the crap you conjured during your stupid ass psychedelic trips. Psychedelics can create spiritual ego. Perhaps it is wise to put that on hold. 

That's all nonsense. Your environment is still the same. You can't alter the environment. The most you can do is live blissed out in an environment which uses you as it's tourniquet.

[MAHAVATAR_-_BABAJI]

On 5/2/2024 at 0:18 AM, Bandman said:

I don't think i can hold on any longer as well tbh

I write poems to help me stay here. I am in the same boat as you. Unfortunately no matter how conscious you become it won't fix the state you are in. Mental alchemy is the only cure. Find solutions that work to alter the states you are entering.

Like this poem below i wrote before almost doing things which would have a permanent aftermath. I find writing to be curative. Idk just a suggestion 😕 :

 

 

^

[ ] What isn't but a memory in the grotesque mind of thee?

[ ] Many nights I awake panting rapidly, glad I've returned to reality.

[ ] At night I ride out the mare to a state between awake and asleep. And when Awake I dread such consistent fucking terror. 

[ ] A consistent dream it may seem to be what we identify as reality.

[ ] Reality is a consistent nightmare where I yearn for the day I awake, panting rapid breaths, to recall "it's only a dream".

[ ] Lucidity is the only key that allows you to escape the horrors of being asleep. 

[ ] Death is the only way to escape the horrors of being awake.

.

.

.

 .

.

[ ] Wherever I go there I am dealing with those who hinder my survival. 

[ ] Still, I have no way to release what's inside.

[ ] Its better to use a curse word or hurt an object than it is to kill a fly

.

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Infected blood. 

2. I am the fist of hell filling the hole of hate with one single fist.

3. They execute a multitude of sadomasochistic events simultaneously and or consecutively

4. While using anger and hate to cure depression.

5. An empty contour line drawing of a rape victim.

6. Ahhhhhhh..Ahhhh...Ahh.

7. Distance is measured in metrics of avoidance.

8. Ohhh... They ran when I rose to face them.

9. They always cater to the antagonist since they fear the protagonist.

10. Speaking to my parents about events which made them fear my presence.

11. Becoming more and more conscious of consciousness, and living in bliss does not cure the sick when certain interactions trigger depression.

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.

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1. Rape

2. Bound 

3. Something sharp that you don't want going in and out of you.

4. That is my reality

5. The troll who hinders my survival 

6. A hole as deep as a well 

7. Something I don't want

8. A sharp emotion

9. Going in and out of you.

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Her Slutty Whorish tongue is the key and her mouth is the gate to hell.

[ ] A women's wrath.

[ ] Hell hath no fury like a women's scorn. 

[ ] Dial M.O.M and the phone reads 666.

[ ] That is how she performs her hypnosis. Chatting into the ears of others and moving mountains with her words, not for better but for worse. 

[ ] A woman's wrath.

[ ] She whispers her petty deceitful words into the ears of authoritative figures. 

[ ] The next day you wake up very happy to interact with the world. 

[ ] "You have been banned from this place"; "I'm calling the police"; "He's creepy"; "Omg...He/she/it is different from me therefore it's disturbing"; "let me get this person in trouble"; "I can stalk you but don't dare look at me or I will call security and the police since I feel threatened"; "I feel unsafe"; "My body....."; "its to protect x,y and z"; "I feel uncomfortable around him so please ban him even though we never spoke"; "omg, he's quiet therefore he's weird and I think might be a psychopath"; "omg it's so easy to be happy..No negativity please"; "Everything I have is all from my families inherentence...I'm privileged"; "How does my ass look gf? Ew, he looked at my ass... How does this ass photo look?"

[ ] Confusion is her weapon.

[ ] Flap flap flap it goes. 

[ ] The sociopath was then born, the depressed died, the separation exists. Good and evil is a game of emotions rather than your being or merit. The whorish tongue gets the News to blame gun control. 

[ ] Maybe it's 'Tongue Control' that might be your very answer?

[ ] Don't Dare go against her word or your being rings misogyny. Don't dare stand up to that whorish mouth or it just might crucify your very soul. It will hinder your survival.

[ ] She yields her sword of mother-like watchfullness to slice the hearts of others based on the way she feels. She ignores all else.

[ ] That stupid whorish tongue is the key to the gates of hell. Remove it and no more hurt shall come to thee. 

[ ] A woman's wrath.

[ ] Death or Silence or a death-like silence is the only known elixir for a woman's wrath...

Edited May 18 by MAHAVATAR_-_BABAJI

[Soul Flight]

@thierry Glad you got through a rough patch there. Be well.

[Agrande]

On 28/04/2024 at 4:06 PM, Princess Arabia said:

I know if I was going to commit suicide I wouldn't be starting a forum thread about it. I wouldn't be responding with laughter to silly commentary. I wouldn't be posting cartoon videos and turning this decision into a fiasco and dramatic play and waiting around for responses to the threat of ending my life like a sequel for my dramatic exit. 

Then again, who knows , this is Absolute Infinity where everything's included and nothing's excluded, so welcome to the party. Buckle up and enjoy the ride. The ride that never ends. 

Perhaps he’s in some sort of manic state. After all this is the mental health section of the forum

Thought people would be a little more understanding 

[Princess Arabia]

49 minutes ago, Agrande said:

Perhaps he’s in some sort of manic state. After all this is the mental health section of the forum

Thought people would be a little more understanding 

49 minutes ago, Agrande said:

 

49 minutes ago, Agrande said:

Perhaps he’s in some sort of manic state. After all this is the mental health section of the forum

Thought people would be a little more understanding 

I can get quite emotional over this stuff where I try to protect it with a bit of insensitivity, if you understand what I mean. Soon after I read this thread, i actually started a new one suggesting that if one needs a lending ear I'm open for dm's.

 

[Agrande]

30 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

I can get quite emotional over this stuff where I try to protect it with a bit of insensitivity, if you understand what I mean. Soon after I read this thread, i actually started a new one suggesting that if one needs a lending ear I'm open for dm's.

 

I understand that i get how people just use mental health to feed their egos meanwhile there are people who are genuinely struggling and crying for help because they've been silent for too long. If one has been through things themselves, it would also be annoying to see people just saying things for attention and making a circus out of it. I get where you're coming from. Don't worry about it, it's cool

[Atb210201]

@thierry Hold on a second

When you don't know for sure anything about after your death how could you make such a decision so fast?

Do you think everything will be butterflies and raibows if you just kill yourself?

Don't be stupid you don't know a damn thing what will happen to you

Just be scared a little about it and don't do it

Be scared of your limited knowledge

You don't know best to not do it I'm telling you

[MAHAVATAR_-_BABAJI]

People try so hard to keep us here to suffer with them. Yet, never actually try to help those who are suffering.

[Schizophonia]

@thierry I would be on Xanax too if i lived at Paris

Edited June 6 by Schizophonia

[petar8p]

On 28. 04. 2024. at 5:06 PM, Princess Arabia said:

I know if I was going to commit suicide I wouldn't be starting a forum thread about it. I wouldn't be responding with laughter to silly commentary. I wouldn't be posting cartoon videos and turning this decision into a fiasco and dramatic play and waiting around for responses to the threat of ending my life like a sequel for my dramatic exit. 

hahah exactly