Seeking forum guidance guys!

[LostSoul]

Hello forum, I would like to seek help as I feel quite lost in my life, and I believe I have the potential to improve it and change its course. If I don't act soon, things might take a turn for the worse. As background, I'm 25 years old and I've always been afraid of intimacy with people, always putting up a barrier against them. Despite this, I've always had friends and people who care about me, but deep down, I've always felt isolated. Everything changed when I had a powerful kundalini awakening when I was 18. I saw everything very clearly, life, relationships, my mind, my ego, everything dissolved. I was in nirvana for 2 weeks. From then on, I had a major existential crisis, as without an ego, I was in complete peace, but gradually the storm returned, and I didn't know who I was anymore. I found Leo's channel and saw incredible potential in myself, but the forces of my mind and my environment made me leave all this behind, and after several depressions, feeling lost, I decided to forget everything and focus on finding a job. Now, 5-6 years have passed, and I have a stable job but I feel like I've lost my soul, everything I saw when I woke up, I left behind to fit into society and have a normal job. My job gives me money but it doesn't motivate me. I don't know what I want. I'm afraid of intimate relationships and showing my soul, as I was the first one to run away from it. I have many repressed emotions, a repressed mind, a repressed soul. The first thing I should do is to be clear about what I want, but what I want scares me, and I'm very attached to avoiding reality, and my mind is slowly deteriorating further. I don't know how to be myself again. Where should I start to purify my mind, break addictions to the phone, drinking, the routine of repression? But I have potential, pure intentions, a stable job, and health, I'm young. I have to start from scratch. Where would you recommend I start in this state of confusion, fear, anxiety, but with potential for change, since one day I saw how everything is the mind, and I intellectually understand much of Leo's teachings, but I don't apply them in my life. Basically, how to actualize all the conceptual bullshit I have in my mind, while at the same time grounding myself in some valuable life.

As more context, i just invest in buying a house here in Spain, just moved out from parents house. I have little almost no experience with girls, i consider myself intelectually and intuition wise (but i deceived myself into always run away from myself!!), I have great openmindeness, I lack vision, I lack confidence, I have good compassion and heart, I think I can be courageous to reset my Life, etc... I have been existencially suffering almost 7 years. I had other minor awakening into the nature of reality, since that huge kundalini (not wanted and out of the blue!!) some conciousness stayed with me forever, but every year is dimissing since i do not do the work, and i have HUGE ANXIETY PAIN in the chest almost 24/7.

THANKS

Edited April 27, 2024 by Leo Gura

[Princess Arabia]

Not diminishing your post; but take a look at my latest one, the one about "Why I'm skeptical about Spiritual teachings, and what I can't get pass". I just made it and now reading this is just another example of what I mean. It's like an epidemic of some sorts. Go check it out and let me know what you think. Spirituality section. It doesn't really give any solutions but may bring more clarity, or more confusion, who knows,

[LostSoul]

@Princess Arabia well... I think I get you. I think a good amount of Life on this planet is luck. So things are what they are... In my case, right now, with all the bullshit i had to experience (bad luck i guess), I'm currently in need of practical guidance to maximize my options of creating a good Life. I think I'm on the fortunate side of the road.

[LostSoul]

@Leo Gura could you share your thoughts on this. At least I have openmindeness, so maybe I need a change on perspective... i don't know, I'm pretty lost.

[Miguel1]

Leo has many great videos on building a good life.

Especially as a youngster, see his series ”advice for young people”.

Also, on top of my mind, see:

65 core princples of a good life,

The ultimate guide to Happiness,

Why Valuable things require time

[Princess Arabia]

4 minutes ago, Miguel1 said:

Leo has many great videos on building a good life.

Especially as a youngster, see his series ”advice for young people”.

Also, on top of my mind, see:

65 core princples of a good life,

The ultimate guide to Happiness,

Why Valuable things require time

These are indeed great ones for practicality. I've seen all these. Very well put together.

[mmKay]

Hey, Welcome to Spain and congratulations for taking a first step towards your well-being.

Writing such a detailed post and reaching out for help is a real milestone. It requieres a serious degree of humbleness and willpower.  Many people fail to even do this.

@LostSoul  What I see : 

Fear of Intimacy and opening up to people . Severe anxiety, repressed emotions, chronically holding a Facade.

Spontaneous and unwanted Mystical experiences, Advanced Spirituallity and Metaphysics has destabilized your life. Spirituallity induced confusion / depression, pretty common.

Stable but unfulfilling career, pretty common.

Feeling of urgency to act. You intuit your potential , but you lack direction, clarity, vision, and feel incompetent and helpless. You avoid thinking and introspecting to avoid further mental and emotional discomfort.

Escapism, addictions.

Lack of confidence . Lack of experience with women. Super common.


Let me know if that sounds like a decent summary.


It's a lot of stuff and one single thread will come nowhere near of seriously transforming your situation.


You basically need a serious experienced Coach with an actual no BS Spiritual background ( aka Leo's content ), for at least 6 months to hold your hand , put you back on your feet and provide you clarity, emotional support and mental relief.

I don't want to sound condescending but it sounds like you're really struggling to get this handled by yourself, at least in the short term, because of the magnitude and ammount of different sticking points. And that's okay. If you have the funds, start looking for a coach. Look out not to be overcharged though, it's common in the Industry.

Leo has videos for every single of these sticking points . Start there maybe .


I'd do it for free as you seem to be a juicy canvas for transformation but recluting people from the forum is against the guidelines. Feel free to PM me for specific questions or start individual threads on each of these sticking points.

Also you can leverage ChatGPT for gaining some clarity.

Where would I start?

Sit down and come up with a decent trajectory for your life. it doesnt have to be perfect, you will refine it on the go. Then slowly take real life action towards it .

Beware of perfectionism and all or nothing thinking. Any small step is a victory that you MUST pat yourself on the back for .
 You're very young and may feel overwhelmed by not having made it by age 25. You're not a kid anymore, but that's life.

Time goes forward whether you like it or not. When is the best time to plant a tree? 20 years ago. When is the second best time ? As soon as possible.

Just having found Leo's content is a goldmine, so feel grateful for that.

You got this 😉

Edited April 27, 2024 by mmKay

[Danioover9000]

@LostSoul

9 hours ago, LostSoul said:

Hello forum, I would like to seek help as I feel quite lost in my life, and I believe I have the potential to improve it and change its course. If I don't act soon, things might take a turn for the worse. As background, I'm 25 years old and I've always been afraid of intimacy with people, always putting up a barrier against them. Despite this, I've always had friends and people who care about me, but deep down, I've always felt isolated. Everything changed when I had a powerful kundalini awakening when I was 18. I saw everything very clearly, life, relationships, my mind, my ego, everything dissolved. I was in nirvana for 2 weeks. From then on, I had a major existential crisis, as without an ego, I was in complete peace, but gradually the storm returned, and I didn't know who I was anymore. I found Leo's channel and saw incredible potential in myself, but the forces of my mind and my environment made me leave all this behind, and after several depressions, feeling lost, I decided to forget everything and focus on finding a job. Now, 5-6 years have passed, and I have a stable job but I feel like I've lost my soul, everything I saw when I woke up, I left behind to fit into society and have a normal job. My job gives me money but it doesn't motivate me. I don't know what I want. I'm afraid of intimate relationships and showing my soul, as I was the first one to run away from it. I have many repressed emotions, a repressed mind, a repressed soul. The first thing I should do is to be clear about what I want, but what I want scares me, and I'm very attached to avoiding reality, and my mind is slowly deteriorating further. I don't know how to be myself again. Where should I start to purify my mind, break addictions to the phone, drinking, the routine of repression? But I have potential, pure intentions, a stable job, and health, I'm young. I have to start from scratch. Where would you recommend I start in this state of confusion, fear, anxiety, but with potential for change, since one day I saw how everything is the mind, and I intellectually understand much of Leo's teachings, but I don't apply them in my life. Basically, how to actualize all the conceptual bullshit I have in my mind, while at the same time grounding myself in some valuable life.

As more context, i just invest in buying a house here in Spain, just moved out from parents house. I have little almost no experience with girls, i consider myself intelectually and intuition wise (but i deceived myself into always run away from myself!!), I have great openmindeness, I lack vision, I lack confidence, I have good compassion and heart, I think I can be courageous to reset my Life, etc... I have been existencially suffering almost 7 years. I had other minor awakening into the nature of reality, since that huge kundalini (not wanted and out of the blue!!) some conciousness stayed with me forever, but every year is dimissing since i do not do the work, and i have HUGE ANXIETY PAIN in the chest almost 24/7.

THANKS

   Looks like you're early in your hero's journey. Fun times ahead, don't worry! Might be gloomy currently but the clouds will part ways and you'll see sunshine ahead, no matter how little sunshine you'll pick yourself up!

   For specific advice like career path, intimacy, the basic stuff, best to seek a life coach or councilor for that area you're seeking to improve. If you have a good idea of a skillset you want to hone in and train? Seek a mentor or master and do maybe a master and apprentice program for a number of years.

   Also, start ASAP on a life vision, any vision at this point of where you want your life to go. Just pick some specific goals and start there. Also worth looking into NLP and visualization exercises to strengthen that visualization skill. For example I can clearly imagine, see/hear/feel sexy situations. Can you imagine sexy situations in that multi sensory way? Worth working on getting clear and vivid pictures and movies in your mind. Just that alone can generate quite a bit of motivation!

[LostSoul]

@Miguel1 thanks 

@mmKay Thank you for your comment, I'm quite impressed with the level of summary and analysis you made of my situation. It's difficult to communicate something so complex in a way that others can help. I'm impressed by the clarity of your response. With few words you gave me some clarity. I will DM you

By the way, I moved out from parents house, but i was born Here in Spain(Asturias).

@Danioover9000 Thanks for the advice. I would add to my initial post that my hero's journey started when I had that Kundalini experience, but the amount of LOVE I felt and the contrast with society, family, etc., made me repress it all, the fear of rejection. I feel like I'm five years behind.

Also, my own psyche juggled to try to forget everything and return to my comfort zone, but it went too far.

Edited April 28, 2024 by LostSoul

[BlessedLion]

Hey brother 

 

it sounds like you are on the right track actually. Having some confusion or uncertainty is normal. It seems like you do have that spiritual longing and it’s something you would need incorporated into your life to feel satisfied. Maybe now you are older and more mature/ready for it than when you were 18. 
 

Doesn’t mean you have to quit your job but maybe take up a meditation or yoga practice and find some spiritual community around you. I’m sure there are lots in Spain. Places where you can do ecstatic dance, yoga, etc and meet other spiritual people. 
 

As for the anxiety, spending time in nature and cutting out toxic habits is very effective. Also a therapist if it’s really bad 
 

That’s just the vibe I’m getting from this post. Hope it helps