ivankiss

I Stand Alone

24 posts in this topic

It doesn't mean I do not feel heart - broken over this or any other separation that's yet to come...

It doesn't mean I am closed off from any new connections...

It doesn't mean I am cowardly hiding in my shell, afraid to step out, or let anyone in...

It doesn't mean I am incapable of forming and nurturing long - lasting relationships.

It's that I value those very deeply, and I know I can only afford a couple of truly good ones.

The path that I walk does not allow me to be too close to many, it seems. At least not yet.

Names of those who share a part of this journey with me are carved into my heart. Our time spent together, our shared experiences, thoughts and feelings, battles and lessons, are of the utmost significance to me. I cherish all those times deeply and honestly.

And it is precisely because of this deeply rooted truth, this honesty, this authenticity... that I know I must move on.

No matter how painful and devastating... I know I must cut the cords. I have no other choice.

It is tragic, it is beautiful and everything in - between.

I cannot lie... I feel like I need a reason to justify my ways; explain and clarify why I must go on alone...

But it all comes down to this knowing inside.

I just know I must go down this road.

A road that I know all too well.

It gets lonely, yes, it does. Don't let anyone lie to you that loneliness isn't real. It fucking is and its claws grip tightly.

But it is a beast that can be tamed. It is bound to pass and disappear, sooner or later.

As all else.

All else... but me.

Only I stay. Everything else is just passing by. 

I am my own. I stand alone.

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted (edited)

Don't glorify your aloneness. Go make some friends.

Not normie friends, but friends on your level of development. Seek out a few spiritually advanced freinds.

Edited by Leo Gura

You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

Don't glorify your aloneness. Go make some friends.

LOL

Agreed yes, just take solitude periods of isolation, retreats are enough for that. 


I believe in the religion of Love
Whatever direction its caravans may take,
For love is my religion and my faith.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

Don't glorify your aloneness. Go make some friends.

Not normie friends, but friends on your level of development. Seek out a few spiritually advanced freinds.

Moving to a new country within a few days, so I kind of have no choice. Must seek out new connections. I am not closed of to those, but I also understand why some must come to an end.

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I understand you. And Leo too, is good to connect if in the connection there is something being shared, you recieve and you give. For me is all about communication. If in a group of small friends there is space for true communication is a good sign that I am in the rigth place. If not, time to go.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Don't glorify your aloneness. Go make some friends.

Not normie friends, but friends on your level of development. Seek out a few spiritually advanced freinds.

Says the guy who refers to his fellow (wo)men as human chimps. Lol.

10 hours ago, ivankiss said:

Moving to a new country within a few days

Where to?

Unless it's the North or South Pole or the freaking desert, I am sure you'll make some friends. You'll be fine.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted (edited)

3 hours ago, Bazooka Jesus said:

Where to?

Amsterdam B|

3 hours ago, Bazooka Jesus said:

Unless it's the North or South Pole or the freaking desert, I am sure you'll make some friends. You'll be fine.

Sure I'll be fine. Again, it's not about me not being able to make friends... its about who and what has to be left behind... Being brave enough to step into the unknown all alone.

Edited by ivankiss

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Right in the childhood!

Feeling your sting down inside me, I'm not dying for it!

I stand alone!

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
29 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

Amsterdam B|

Cool, never been there... even though it's not far from where I live. Mind if I pay you a visit sometime? 9_9

31 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

Again, it's not about me not being able to make friends... its about who and what has to be left behind... Being brave enough to step into the unknown all alone.

Yeah, you need to be able to let go of old rags in order to receive new riches. Can't pick up a golden nugget if you're desperately holding on to a piece of clay, right?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@ivankiss have you ever made friends that resonated with you and how did that go? 


My name is Reena Gerlach and I'm a woman of few words. 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted (edited)

1 hour ago, Bazooka Jesus said:

Cool, never been there... even though it's not far from where I live. 

Where do you live?

1 hour ago, Bazooka Jesus said:

Mind if I pay you a visit sometime? 9_9

Of course.

1 hour ago, Bazooka Jesus said:

Yeah, you need to be able to let go of old rags in order to receive new riches. Can't pick up a golden nugget if you're desperately holding on to a piece of clay, right?

Yes, very well said.

1 hour ago, Buck Edwards said:

have you ever made friends that resonated with you and how did that go? 

Of course. Had lots of and all kinds of friends, up until a few years ago when it all kind of cleared up on its own. 2-3 people remained... those are all 10-15+ yr old friendships. Strong and meaningful. But not too active. They are all spread around.

Edited by ivankiss

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

Where do you live?

Berlin... for the time being. ;) Feel free to stop by and pay me a visit too!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
13 minutes ago, Bazooka Jesus said:

Berlin... for the time being. ;) Feel free to stop by and pay me a visit too!

Sounds great.  We'll be in touch.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
18 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Don't glorify your aloneness. Go make some friends.

Not normie friends, but friends on your level of development. Seek out a few spiritually advanced freinds.

There is nothing wrong with being alone. He will meet people trough music and things he is enjoying I am sure. He can seek a little bit more if he wants to but I think I get his problem. You, Leo, have different work life balance and potential of people you meet, because of what you have created. Me and Ivankiss don't have that. Work takes most of the time. But some good self development or spirituality usually happens alone and gradually.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, ivankiss said:

Sounds great.  We'll be in touch.

👌

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 4/26/2024 at 8:58 PM, Leo Gura said:

Don't glorify your aloneness. Go make some friends.

Not normie friends, but friends on your level of development. Seek out a few spiritually advanced freinds.

@Leo Gura Where do you find them? They seem to be nowhere, I don't know where to look...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At the end of the day you only have yourself.


There is nothing safe with playing it safe.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Spiritedness alot of them are women go talk to women. they are into this kinda stuff.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted (edited)

Loneliness is your opportunity to connect with God. I'm thankful for those moments although loneliness can be hard too. That is the whole point of it: loneliness can break you and make you negative or it can build character.

I enjoy my social time but I prefer my me-time too. My greatest hurdle is being able to switch between those 2: being in my head versus being in the world.

When socializing you have to be almost 0% in your head. That is why extraverts are great at making friends. And that is why introverts are not so good with making friends: they are in their head and have this energetic wall up. It is hard to connect to such a person. It is not personal so no need to make a victim mindset out of this.

At the end of the day, you and the father are one. Everything you need is already inside of you. Your aloneness is identification with negativity and separateness. If you identify with that, outer reality will just reflect what you believe. It is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Trying to fix the outer circumstances without fixing the inner circumstance is masochism.

When you are alone, you are not "alone", you are with your Self. What is your relationship to it? Everybody has their divine spark or energetic imprint or personality. You should see yourself as a gift to the world and the other people. This will define whether you have a high vibe or low vibe.

Edited by StarStruck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 4/27/2024 at 8:13 PM, Spiritedness said:

Where do you find them? They seem to be nowhere, I don't know where to look...

Wanna hear a funny story?

So, I have been dating this super hot Russian girl for the past year and a half, right... She's not 'awake' or into spirituality, personal development or anything like that. She's super smart and highly educated, but does not see past those limitations. It could be said that she's as hardcore stage orange as it gets.

So yeah, our relationship was challenging - to say the least - as I'm sure you can imagine.

Point is, we've been living together in the middle of nowhere all this time. She had her circle of friends (that I could not resonate less with) and I was more or less committed to hardcore isolation, working on my life purpose, etc. I rarely ever went out with her group... 

And then, a few days ago, out of nowhere... she comes home with this utter disbelief on her face and says to me that she met a girl who is just like me. She said she spoke about the same concepts, used similar words and phrases, described similar experiences, etc. It's as if she was listening to one of my nondual ramblings - she said.

She was excited, intimidated, and more. 

I was surprised too - to say the least.

An awakened being, somewhere here by, in the middle of nowhere? - I thought to myself.

That's fucking epic. 

But also... who gives a shit.

Never met the girl myself. Probably won't either. Don't feel at a loss.

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now