war diary

[Lila9]

We are expecting attacks in the next few days from Iran and Hezbollah as revenge for Israel’s assassination of Hamas and Hezbollah leaders.

Hezbollah is dropping missiles on Israel every day and causing some damage, but this time we expect something more serious. I actually live relatively close to the border with Lebanon and have started to have much more disturbing thoughts about all of this. 

This is the worst summer of my life.
I feel so limited and unsafe. I have to be strong and carry on psychologically, work as usual, and keep my sanity and the sanity of those around me because there is no other option.

I allow myself to fall into escapism as well. I smoke some weed once in a while to reset my nervous system and do some yoga and breathwork. 
 

My mind recalls all the people I know and not who were murdered by Palestinian terrorists because they happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Like the people murdered by terrorists in the buses, on the streets, in the clubs, in the malls, the Nova people, and the hostages. All while living their lives and minding their business. This is heartbreaking. I feel bad, I feel terrible.

There is a serious rise in addiction, mental health issues, and suicide rates in Israel. The mental health system is crashing and can’t find solutions for all of this. This war shows well the weakness and how unprepared the mental health system in Israel is. 

I have never wanted peace so badly as now. Now I am obsessed with peace. Peace, peace, and peace.
On the other hand, I understand how complex the reality and the path to peace are. This is unbearable to hold in my mind.

With the world’s unjust hatred towards Israel, our narcissistic leaders, the terror threat from every corner, and the ideological conflicts within Israel itself.

I appreciate the military in Israel more than ever for its efforts to secure the civilians.
I don’t care how the world view them, for me and for the majority of Israel citizens they are heroes. Without them and their constant work, I very likely couldn’t be here alive writing this today.

 

Edited August 5 by Lila9

[Lila9]

Another murder of Israeli hostages by Hamas. They were shot in their heads.

I can't.

 

 

[Lila9]

I can't stop crying.

[Lila9]

I don’t know how effective this protest will be. Just another protest, one of many. Even prior to October 7, people were already highly disappointed with the government because of its attempts to destroy democracy. 

The government seem indifferent and detached.

I have recurring dreams about the hostages, where I either see them being released or in a dark tunnel, lean, scared, and handicapped.

 

 

[Lila9]

The hostages are in inhumane conditions in Hamas captivity.  
Yesterday, footage of the tunnel where the six hostages were murdered was published.  
And oh my God, I can’t even imagine what those young people went through.  
A very tiny space, a narrow tunnel, 120 meters underground, no fresh air, very, very poor conditions for 11 months, with six terrorists who could murder them at any given moment, which they eventually did.

 

 

[Lila9]

@Something Funny

This is non of your business. 

If you have nothing valuable to add to the thread, then please don’t comment.

This is a sensitive thread to me and I would not tolerate here any bs.

We don’t share the same opinions, and that’s fine. Just accept it and move on. I am a stranger for you I owe you nothing.

If you can’t communicate with me maturely and respectfully, like you have already proved so many times that you can’t, then don’t communicate with me at all.

Do me a favor and put me on your ignore list. I would really appreciate it.