How To Attract People Being Ugly?

[blacksapp]

Hi there, here am I again.
I would like to ask: how to deal with the lack of beautifulness, when you want to attract people?
I mean, I'm not so beautiful and much often people tell me that, so I feel kinda bad 'cause I don't feel so good to attract someone.
Even, feel lacks of subjects to talk to people so...any tips?
Thanks

[Tibor]

5 hours ago, blacksapp said:

Even, feel lacks of subjects to talk to people so...any tips?

Ask questions let them give the subjects and be interested in the other instead of being interesting by comming up with subjects.

Not a lot of people are used to someone who's really interested in what they have to say, these days.

Have fun 

[Lai]

                                                                    Look at his dog.

Some people will tell you this dog is ugly, but I see pure beauty and intelligence in those eyes.  If I guy looked at me this way, I would probably fall head over heels.

 

On 4/15/2017 at 5:04 AM, blacksapp said:

I'm not so beautiful and much often people tell me that, so I feel kinda bad 'cause I don't feel so good to attract someone.

Oh sweetie... don't listen to those shallow people, they cannot see past the surface!

Your inner beauty is not for their eyes.

 

Edited April 16, 2017 by Lai

[pluto]

The problem here is "I'm not so beautiful" You think that initially that attracts the "and much often people tell me that" afterwards.

Change that mindset and tell yourself every day in the mirror you are beautiful, and don't just really believe it but KNOW it.. you really are, inside we are all part of creation thus all perfect of a divine order but how we choose to see ourselves is how we attract the reality around us.

Do this for sometime and notice how everything changes and more people notice you for what you really are and what you really want instead of what you have grown too and became used to.

See when i was younger i used to think i was ugly because of school and peer pressure but then when i went to holidays in my home country my family and friends always would say I'm beautiful and every time i went there more people ans girls would notice that beauty and i thought its just the people there see me for who i am because they are of the same background until later on in life i realized it was just my own mind believing that were to be the case but instead the case was that i had that belief that only over there they seem me as beautiful and here they don't. After i realized this i said to myself so i'm beautiful here too i have just to believe and know it like i do for over there and eventually everyone started noticing me here as well and its now the same everywhere i go.

[Echoes]

 

[Christian]

@blacksapp

This is not a problem with you not being able to attract people. It is more about how you may lack self esteem and confidence. You probably believe that it is your looks that hold you back from attracting the right people. But this whole focus on appearance is just a part of the social matrix and our culture, but  it is all an illusion. You were fed this whole idea that some people are beautiful and ugly at a very young age when you had no awareness of how to differentiate what is right and wrong. So you simply believed what people around you told you and used that to place yourself somewhere on that beauty scale - toward the uglier end.And now who is paying the price?

But how do you overcome this? Existential inquiry is my suggestion, could be right or wrong, but nevertheless, I think it will help.'

I have some things I want you to think about to really transcend this idea of beauty and hopefully get rid of it all together. I want you to get rid of the idea of beauty like a cancer patient would extract his tumor. Heartlessly, brutally and efficiently.

Try to understand this:

No one is beautiful or ugly in the absolute sense. TRY TO GRASP THIS: NO ONE IS BEAUTIFUL OR UGLY IN THE ABSOLUTE SENSE. BEAUTY IS ARBITRARY. TRY TO ACTUALLY FIND THE BEAUTY. IS IT REAL OR IS IT SIMPLY YOUR MIND LABELLING PEOPLE AND THINGS WITHOUT BEING CONSCIOUS THAT IT IS ALL A GAME, A FALSE GAME?

Even our justifications of why someone/something is beautiful is arbitrary. It stems from our preferences as a species and who says our preferences are right? WHAT JUSTIFYES THAT OUR HUMAN PREFERENCES ARE RIGHT/TRUE? TRY TO HONESTLY ANSWER THIS.

Look at what is going on existentially and I am willing to bet that it is not your physical looks that really hold you back, but the fact that you BELIVE they do. This belief has probably messed a little with your self esteem and I think it is time you throw this whole beauty thing out the window. If it does not help you to believe that you are physically attractive, why do it is my question?

If you actually do the investigation, I am willing to bet you are going to laugh your ass off at how stupid this whole notion of beauty is and possibly get rid of it.