Fear Of Christian Hell

[bambi]

Hell is a real state of conciousness, its a deep disconnect from God, I have been there after relapsing to cocaine, alcohol etc after 3-4 years of deep spritiual practise. I systemetically ignored all warnings from God (light of conciounsess in dreams etc), until I had torn all my chakras in my head. Not blocked, but torn. I was having constant demonic thoughts, and I could barely get out of bed to the couch, breathing was painful, it was utterly terrofying to be alive, and the thought of dieing was even more terrofying

So I take hihg dose lsd and psilocybin, and had possible the most traumatising experiencies you could possibly have.

Imagine an infinite ball of light like the sun, and then being disconnect from it and thrown deep into the edges of a solar system, whilst simultanously feeling pure terror, not anxiety, pure terror, the must uncomfrtaoble feeling you could possible face, and then on the outskirts of this glaxy a red portal appears and starts sucking you in, at this time you beg for mercy with all your heart and soul.

The problem is your soul is full of resentment by this point, you truly have hatred for life and God and yourself due to the pain and resentment you harbor. My life after relapsing to cocaine for 18-24 months was pure hell, I was in so much pain. I had been in serious pain for the 2-3 years of sobriety too, so I was compeltely done by this point

It became clear that if I dont dig deep and change my attitude and ask for forgiveness and surrender, the place I was going to is beyong terrofying

So i begged for mercy and forgiveness, and told I was in purgatory. My chakra system in my forehead was totally fucked, 1cm thick blockaged in forehead, all the meridians around my head torn, and trying to reconnect, uttterly utterly terrofying, 

Theye improved in the past 5 months of celibacy, and absolutely no durgs and alcohol daily mediation and several more trips. the blockages are down to 40% of what they were. Im still completely fucked but hopefully I can heal if I dont relapse

Oh I also had a message during this experience of 'last chance', so thats also terrorfying.

 

Now whether if I entered the portal would I be stuck there forever, I dont know. But I do know your resenment and hatred would grow exponentially and your ability to forgive and reconnect, and the pain you would have to overcome would be truly remarkable. So Im not making any claim to whether its eternal or not, but for sure its not possible to want to find out

Also whether there is an act of mercy from God, I dont know, I actually think not, as it seems God-agnostic. theres a sense this is total down to you, your own making, you systemetically brought yourself here and became this person, now you have to get yourself out.

 

[UnbornTao]

@bambi You need to do serious work on distinguishing concept from experience.

[bambi]

7 hours ago, UnbornTao said:

@bambi You need to do serious work on distinguishing concept from experience.

Sorry I dont follow

[UnbornTao]

On 24/07/2024 at 9:21 AM, bambi said:

Sorry I dont follow

In short, your mind is making stuff up that may not be grounded on "reality", true events or fact, whereas getting present tends to decrease your conceptualizing, providing a more accurate perception of what is happening within your experience. 

What's left in your experience when you strip away the ideas of chakras, hell, god? Feeling, thoughts, perception; elements in a raw, intimate and present form that are somehow more real. Even though you may benefit from them, reconsidering your relationship towards them--acknowledging that these may be beliefs and so not existentially true--helps create distance from them and opens up genuine questioning.

Therefore, increasing one's presence is a good direction to move towards. Hope that helps.

Edited July 27 by UnbornTao

[bambi]

8 hours ago, UnbornTao said:

In short, you're making stuff up that may not be grounded on anything real (believing stuff), whereas getting present tends to decrease that conceptualizing activity and leave you with a more accurate perception of what is happening. 

For example, what's left in your experience when you strip away chakras, hell, god, etc? You may notice sensations, thoughts, perception; elements in a more raw, intimate and present form that are somehow "realer". So, increasing one's presence is a good direction to move towards. Hope that helps.

This is the most idiotically informed post I have ever recieved by an ego on any forum, your delusional dude! Go ego-posture on someone else lol!

It's not possible for you to help me, Im more experienced spirituality and more advanced, your only helping yourself feel smart and superior, which is false; you're an idiot to me, thats the reailty, hope that helps.

Edited July 25 by bambi

[gettoefl]

56 minutes ago, bambi said:

This is the most idiotically informed post I have ever recieved by an ego on any forum, your delusional dude! Go ego-posture on someone else lol!

It's not possible for you to help me, Im more experienced spirituality and more advanced, your only helping yourself feel smart and superior, which is false; you're an idiot to me, thats the reailty, hope that helps.

yes take no notice, he was way out of line here, thanks for sharing what you did, it must be unimaginably horrific what you have undergone and i thank god you're dealing with it better, good to see you posting and hope you are doing well today 

[UnbornTao]

4 hours ago, bambi said:

This is the most idiotically informed post I have ever recieved by an ego on any forum, your delusional dude! Go ego-posture on someone else lol!

It's not possible for you to help me, Im more experienced spirituality and more advanced, your only helping yourself feel smart and superior, which is false; you're an idiot to me, thats the reailty, hope that helps.

Okey doke.