Good VS Evil

[Buck Edwards]

Sometimes you invest your energy into wrong sources. There's nothing inherently evil. Just what I believe. 

[Buck Edwards]

Samadhi works but through the gateway of good and evil. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

I'm looking forward to integrating purity into my practice. Also I want to stay away from the world in general. I think that spiritual communities can cause a ton of harm. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

I don't know what made me write this. But I write it with a heavy heart. Like any other thing that comes with it's own set of pros and cons, spiritual communities aren't exempt from drawbacks either. I'm not specifically talking about forums although forums are a fraction of it. I'm just saying communities in general. I have reached a point where I'm seriously contemplating whether being a part of a larger community is really worth it if the results aren't really there and if things are just getting worse with the illusion that you're on a spiritual path and you are achieving something when in reality millions of people with mental and physical problems turn to spirituality only for bypassing their real issues, are barely able to cope through life and end up being and doing worse when they get on the spiritual path. They start to rot and lose interest in life and daily activities once they begin to live in a solipsistic bubble. Instead of thriving, they start rapidly degrading. The consequences can be anywhere from suicide to mental illness to death or just living like a zombie. I'm sure people in the past have also expressed such a sentiment on this forum  before. It's a routine thing, not to mention the problem of false teachings. Things that degrade your mental well being or just take you on a path of disillusionment. You gotta do the math yourself. Are you in this for the better or are things genuinely not turning out to be the way they should. 

I was barely 9 years old when I first started with spirituality. I haven't come very far because life came in between. I devoted a significant portion of my life in chasing delusions (let's put it that way). I suffered autism at a young age and in my teens I was obsessed with spirituality and religion. I always thought I was looking for something, searching for something, there was this existential crisis like thing going on with me. I was often at my wits end. Don't get me wrong. I derived a lot of benefit from this forum itself. Leo's teachings, his videos on personal development were a great starting point. But there's a problem. Everything is not so hunky dory. I still think that I suffered a bit in the process and not in a good way. It's like "invited" suffering. I don't know if this is the inherent nature of spiritual work. But I went through phases of insanity. I didn't do psychedelics (God only knows what suffering might have resulted from that). But so far not so stellar results. I have significant mental illness. I don't know if that's interfering with my spiritual stuff. 

One thing I casually noticed in spiritual communities is the huge problem of spiritual ego. People fight a lot over what's right or wrong. There's a certain dogmatism that accompanies it. This downgrades the whole spiritual process significantly. This is not alien to any community, it's to be found in every spiritual community.

Be careful with what you decide to put your energy into. I have suffered significantly. 

[Buck Edwards]

I'm suffering a lot since past 6 months. The whole spirituality thing has caused me some medical issues. 

I don't know what I should do. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

Will I be the next person to go into a downward spiral that I can't seem to stop?. 

[Buck Edwards]

I don't want to live anymore. 

[Buck Edwards]

Maybe I can start a Facebook group or something. I'll talk to my family about this. 

[Buck Edwards]

I think I'll do this on Instagram. I don't know lol. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

I just created my Instagram profile and I'm new to Instagram. 

https://www.instagram.com/energycleansingvibration?igsh=Y2I4NzhzajhxamRn

 

[Buck Edwards]

I also added a new community post to my YouTube Channel. Now I can post mostly on there instead of here. 

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

I don't know what made me write this. But I write it with a heavy heart. Like any other thing that comes with it's own set of pros and cons, spiritual communities aren't exempt from drawbacks either. I'm not specifically talking about forums although forums are a fraction of it. I'm just saying communities in general. I have reached a point where I'm seriously contemplating whether being a part of a larger community is really worth it if the results aren't really there and if things are just getting worse with the illusion that you're on a spiritual path and you are achieving something when in reality millions of people with mental and physical problems turn to spirituality only for bypassing their real issues, are barely able to cope through life and end up being and doing worse when they get on the spiritual path. They start to rot and lose interest in life and daily activities once they begin to live in a solipsistic bubble. Instead of thriving, they start rapidly degrading. The consequences can be anywhere from suicide to mental illness to death or just living like a zombie.  It's a routine thing, not to mention the problem of false teachings. Things that degrade your mental well being or just take you on a path of disillusionment. You gotta do the math yourself. Are you in this for the better or are things genuinely not turning out to be the way they should. 

I was barely 9 years old when I first started with spirituality. I haven't come very far because life came in between. I devoted a significant portion of my life in chasing delusions (let's put it that way). I suffered autism at a young age and in my teens I was obsessed with spirituality and religion. I always thought I was looking for something, searching for something, there was this existential crisis like thing going on with me. I was often at my wits end. Don't get me wrong.  But there's a problem. Everything is not so hunky dory. I still think that I suffered a bit in the process and not in a good way. It's like "invited" suffering. I don't know if this is the inherent nature of spiritual work. But I went through phases of insanity. I didn't do psychedelics (God only knows what suffering might have resulted from that). But so far not so stellar results. I have significant mental illness. I don't know if that's interfering with my spiritual stuff. 

One thing I casually noticed in spiritual communities is the huge problem of spiritual ego. People fight a lot over what's right or wrong. There's a certain dogmatism that accompanies it. This downgrades the whole spiritual process significantly. This is not alien to any community, it's to be found in every spiritual community.

Be careful with what you decide to put your energy into. I have suffered significantly. 

Edited March 17 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

9 minutes ago, Buck Edwards said:

 

 

I don't know what made me write this. But I write it with a heavy heart. Like any other thing that comes with it's own set of pros and cons, spiritual communities aren't exempt from drawbacks either. I'm not specifically talking about forums although forums are a fraction of it. I'm just saying communities in general. I have reached a point where I'm seriously contemplating whether being a part of a larger community is really worth it if the results aren't really there and if things are just getting worse with the illusion that you're on a spiritual path and you are achieving something when in reality millions of people with mental and physical problems turn to spirituality only for bypassing their real issues, are barely able to cope through life and end up being and doing worse when they get on the spiritual path. They start to rot and lose interest in life and daily activities once they begin to live in a solipsistic bubble. Instead of thriving, they start rapidly degrading. The consequences can be anywhere from suicide to mental illness to death or just living like a zombie.  It's a routine thing, not to mention the problem of false teachings. Things that degrade your mental well being or just take you on a path of disillusionment. You gotta do the math yourself. Are you in this for the better or are things genuinely not turning out to be the way they should. 

I was barely 9 years old when I first started with spirituality. I haven't come very far because life came in between. I devoted a significant portion of my life in chasing delusions (let's put it that way). I suffered autism at a young age and in my teens I was obsessed with spirituality and religion. I always thought I was looking for something, searching for something, there was this existential crisis like thing going on with me. I was often at my wits end. Don't get me wrong.  But there's a problem. Everything is not so hunky dory. I still think that I suffered a bit in the process and not in a good way. It's like "invited" suffering. I don't know if this is the inherent nature of spiritual work. But I went through phases of insanity. I didn't do psychedelics (God only knows what suffering might have resulted from that). But so far not so stellar results. I have significant mental illness. I don't know if that's interfering with my spiritual stuff. 

One thing I casually noticed in spiritual communities is the huge problem of spiritual ego. People fight a lot over what's right or wrong. There's a certain dogmatism that accompanies it. This downgrades the whole spiritual process significantly. This is not alien to any community, it's to be found in every spiritual community.

Be careful with what you decide to put your energy into. I have suffered significantly. 

I just shared this on my community post. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

 

I have moved some of my Public entries to this place. My diary org. I'm there as username as Clean Energy. 

https://www.my-diary.org/users/1055403/cleanenergy

Even my Instagram name is Energycleansingvibration

 

 

[Buck Edwards]

My first entry there. 

https://www.my-diary.org/edit/a/viewentry/546789270

[Buck Edwards]

You can click on this and view my entries here. As and when my update them in case anyone wants to view. 

 

https://www.my-diary.org/read/d/1055403/cleanenergy

Under my profile there I guess the entries are visible. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

[Buck Edwards]

 

 

What principles should an ideal spiritual community adhere to? 

I think these are the principles I came up with that in my opinion a spiritual community should be able to reflect. 

 

 

Uplifting each other 

Keeping harmony 

Polite behavior 

Reduction in negativity 

Encouraging open mindedness 

Healing each other 

Non judgement attitude 

Peace keeping 

Thoughtful debating 

No one-upping 

No cult like rules

Respect for everyone 

Working on behaviors 

Video conferencing and meet ups. Face to face interactions are better 

Flattened hierarchies

No us versus them narrative 

No messiah complex 

Discouraging gaslighting 

Encouraging extensive communication 

Discouraging dogmatism 

Fostering understanding and mutual harmony 

Showing love 

Embodying values 

Working on integrity and character 

Fostering forgiveness 

Fostering mercy 

Fostering kindness 

Raising each other's vibration 

Encouraging emotional maturity 

Keeping community tight knit 

Cutting down spiritual ego 

Providing a safe space 

Not preying on vulnerability 

Extending support to people who suffer more 

Having a judgement free zone 

Fostering compassion 

Dissolution of separation 

Fostering Unity 

Empathetic environment 

Minimum use of power 

Encouraging free expression

Valuing one another 

Not demonizing 

Embodiment of love 

Edited March 17 by Buck Edwards

[Buck Edwards]

I think I would need a daily empowering pep talk.