I'm nervous to go out to bars because I am worried I will have to defend myself.

[NightHawkBuzz]

I use to go out to bars with one of my friends regularly. We would usually go out on Fridays.

However I haven't went out to bars with him in a while and that is because I am nervous about someone trying to start a physical confrontation with me and then I am going to have to really put my hands on someone.

When I was going out to these places with my friend there were three different situations that I remember that happened.

All three situations had to do with guys who had initiated some type of verbal confrontations with me and if I didn't have the wisdom to just walk away from all the situations with my friend like I did.

They would have escalated into real physical fights with all three of these guys.

I am also upset to because I feel like in these situations I had just walked away to avoid the confrontations but I didn't really stand up for myself verbally the way I wanted to.

However that was only to avoid a physical fight with all three of these people so I didn't get into any legal trouble.

All three of these situations had to do with some crazy, psycho dude and If I didn't just walk away like I did they would have escalated into physical fights.

What should I do because I want to go out to bars still but I also don't want to get into a physical fight which is what I fear is going to happen.

[Phil King]

17 minutes ago, NightHawkBuzz said:

All three of these situations had to do with some crazy, psycho dude and If I didn't just walk away like I did they would have escalated into physical fights.

What should I do because I want to go out to bars still but I also don't want to get into a physical fight

The solution is to do exactly what you did before and just walk away. You dont even want to waste time and energy with those psychos. Dont get caught in the script and just move on with your night

Edited March 10 by Phil King

[Princess Arabia]

What you fear you create. You are subconsciously asking for it when you're focused on what you don't want. It's pretty simple. Focus on what you want to happen, not what you don't want to happen. It's not rocket science. You are the light of Awareness and what you put your attention on expands.

This is why it's important to still incorporate Spirituality with the practical side of life because one is not separate from the other, everything is entangled. You don't have to be all Spiritual if that's not your thing and be all in, but at least try to understand how certain aspects correlates to how things work in the "real world" because you are it.

Also try to recognize what is it within you that you are either fighting against or resisting why you keep attracting these circumstances to you to begin with; and please don't do the blame game thing because that's just projecting victimhood behavior. You have the power to attract and repel so try to adjust your thinking, concept of self and how you view the world around you to limit how much of these circumstances shows up in your awareness. 

[ZenSwift]

2 hours ago, Phil King said:

 

Very entertaining video. 

[Phil King]

20 minutes ago, ZenSwift said:

Very entertaining video

Yes it is lol, Jeffy is a great speaker. I was actually at this seminar which is why it jumped into my mind. 

[bebotalk]

it depends on the bar and environment one goes into. 

Not all bars are inherently violent. 

[Basman]

On 11/03/2024 at 0:51 AM, Phil King said:

 

Great video.

I had myself an experience with a dude who was throwing out "hooks" like he describes in the video, heckling me and looking to escalate. I clearly noticed that in this moment, if I don't somehow deescalate, this will turn into a fight that probably wouldn't be worth fighting. So I apologized for whatever he was mad about (he was mentally ill and mistook me for his father or something like that) and he left me alone since.

But I can totally understand the pride thing. A part of me really wishes that I just destroyed him instead. The urge to "complete the monkey script" is real and it feels like unfinished business. It motivates me to learn martial arts and become stronger so I at least know that I can handle myself.

Edited March 25 by Basman

[meta_male]

On 11.3.2024 at 0:35 AM, NightHawkBuzz said:

I am also upset to because I feel like in these situations I had just walked away to avoid the confrontations but I didn't really stand up for myself verbally the way I wanted to.

This is what scares you the most. If you were able to handle these people with force you'd be able to deescalate and let it slip. Now you let it go but feel like a loser.

[Raze]

https://www.girlschase.com/content/dealing-disruptive-men