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Infinity is nothingness. If it is not something you are imagining, it exists as Infinity or actual nothing (pure Actuality)

God = Everything/Nothing (God can not be 'known' in relative/rational/logical/dual terms... 'it' has no limits, no qualities, no 'somethingness') For 'Everything/Nothing' to 'seem like something'.. introducing... 'imaginary duality'. (by 'pretending/imagining' that 'Everything/Nothing' is not what it is (is separate from itself).. Something 'appears' (seems to be)) All 'duality/limits/qualities/description' is 'imaginary'.. and this is what 'Creation' is... the 'mechanism by which Everything/Nothing 'knows/imagines/creates' itself (Somethingness, rather than 'Everythingness/Nothingness') The Map (imagined duality/separateness) is not, and can never be 'The Territory' (non-duality/oneness), and at the same time.. it IS the territory (you, me, everything there 'is').

@Stefan Heuer I'm still wrapping my head around it too. Basically all of reality is happening in God's imagination. Even the physical world. Because of this, its not real. None of it ever happened or could possibly happen. It's nothing at all. God is having a human experience in it's own mind. Physicality only is possible because reality is infinite nothingness in the first place. The problem with science, hitting other people, is that it's all contextual and takes place within the dream. But because we have forgotten we are God, it all seems so real. It's kind of like saying "Well, if its a dream then how come all this dream stuff is happening?" I found the Book Labyrinths Of Reason's opening pages really useful. The dreamer is beyond any individual person or ego, its a universal dreamer. God has forever to do whatever. Forgetting is a virtue. God wants to explore itself and get to know itself through its limitations. How else would god experience what it's like to be mortal unless it used it's immortal power to experience that? Only an immortal could be a mortal. It's a paradox. The only thing that can be immortal is nothing. Nothing can be anything. You are experiencing a sliver of that anything nothing right now! I don't know about the multiple lives thing. Other than you actually don't live any lives. The fact that anything exists at all is hard for the materialist mind to wrap itself around. once you catch a glimpse of eternity and infinity it starts making more sense. Honestly I am still a newbie on this path.

Guys im so deeply confused about leo's teachings (like "Why brains dont exist" & "making sense of paranormal phenomena" )and there is just way too much videos for me to know where to start. In this case I cant connect teachings like: there is no self but there is also no external world(everything being a hallucination/perception) and stuff like: yes, there probably exist immaterial souls (my interpretation of leo saying we might have lived many different lifes) (video: outrageous experiments in consciousness 30 Awakenings in 30 days) and I might have lived many different lifes but after death there is only nothingness forever. What I also dont understand is how idealism should solve the mind body problem (because stuff still feels solid and my brothers or dogs body is hurt when I punch them) and I havent found much value on this forum either. Also how does besided the mindbody dualism the semantic dualism of nothing and everything collapse? And how is the dualism of my perspective of planet earth versus my brothers perspective of planet earth collapse? Also what does general & special theory of relativity and Quantum Electro Dynamics mean for my thoughts, my actions and the following linear consequences like my mothers, the planet earth's (The fossil record tells us that life on Earth has lasted at least 3.5 billion years ->implies science has taken measurments of the external world and predictions say that in 2 billion years our ocean will be boiling due to the swelling of our sun) or my death? Also I recently took an MRI-Scan, Shouldnt this prove the existance of my skull on planet earth? Can someone give me a model of reality, the world, humans and myself including this empitness/void/nothingness everyone is talking about and also explain me the here stated paradoxes? Please be very concrete if possible, 90 % of the stuff I read here I dont really understand. You'd be my hero. THanks in adavance

I do not deny the existence of preferences. Because, preference is the very nature of being - but within these, there are further dualities, with boundaries, however imaginary, that can be ascertained to a degree, according to the levels of your perception --- and these are pushing you towards something that you are inadvertently attached to. The key point here being - comprehending the nature of the intricate dualities of the concept of preference. An 'indifferent existence' is an oxymoron. It cannot, and will never exist together. Existence can never be indifferent - it can masquerade as that, in an illusory form, hidden underneath some sort of deeper, and most probably, egoic manifestation - giving an idea that you are being indifferent - where in reality, you just aren't, and never can. As you said, total indifference cannot exist beyond concept, and therefore, is not a pre-requisite to this discussion, altogether. Did watch the video, and it does stress upon the point that I tried to put forth, ab initio - Leo talks about something called the 'Emergent Phenomenon' - that the randomness coincides with the non-randomness, too - there is a complex order to it, and variations do tend to have a very real effect. The point with the free will debate is not that people become hopeless (hint: egoic love for self, and the consequent loss of it masquerading as indifference), but that people comprehend the nature of ego and Nothingness, in the first place. This was one of Leo's first few videos on such topics, and what he is trying to say, in facile terms, is that it's all God - and that free will requires the acceptance and realization that it is all Oneness - and there's nothing quite outside you - for Everything is you, and you are a product and the manufacturer of it. That, an 'I' is not solely responsible for all that happens to 'themselves', because in the greater picture, 'I' work in tandem with the vastness, unbeknownst to my egoic self that strives for rigorous separation. He talks about these 37 trillion cells working for us, and not the egoic 'I' - and that is what it is - there is something working, that is not so arbitrary. We cannot shun it by saying that nothing makes sense, because quite evidently, there is some sort of meaning that we are able to give. Moreover, one cannot give meaning to things that do not make sense - the meaning and the cohesiveness of a certain thing have an inter-dependent relationship. He gives the example of being seated in a car, and realizing that you have no control since you are not the one steering the vehicle towards its destination - the idea behind this is that while you may realize that your illusion of control has been broken, it doesn't completely erase the fact that you are in a car, and are actually going somewhere. Therefore, understanding the concept of free will, in my opinion, means that while I may be walking the path, it is not the 'I' that is walking the path --- but anyway, both of it does mean that the path does exist, and is being travelled upon. As Leo put it, it is the mind that constructs preferences and thereafter makes the decisions - and each decision has a consequence. With the example of Google that he gave - if just because Google considers itself an input, no matter how deceived it is, it will never cease being an output - it is a something, and the something has real functions and is striving in some regard, and will behave in a particular, predictable fashion if certain buttons are pushed. The free will debate just juggles around the concepts of ego vs surrender - but it cannot deny the existence of things and or the functions attached to them - that is, once you have realized that ego is at play, and that it likes to take all the 'credit' - you, as an enlightened being, will try to not include it in the actual play. . Preferences do have mechanical elements to it - if one needs results, they need to train and try - and that's a very coherent process of this reality, as well, that would be absurd to deny. The results are the attachment. And if something is mechanical, it works by cultivating 'practical' relationships that need to be honored for its effective completion, without which the goal will never be reached. To be honest, we are all seeking something, and that, by its very nature gives it a mechanical touch. The very concept that surrendering gives the feeling of 'power', is somewhere, in itself, a subtle sort of attachment. Now that I think of it, haha, existence is nothing but a series of infinite attachments, glued together with love or whatever we may call it - that we can just accept through becoming enlightened through empathy; nonetheless, the lack of judgement, coming back to your original question, cannot happen in this finite, human lifetime, because judgement is the very core of your existence. The path is the judgement - that requires attachment for its effective, mechanical completion - with its own set of consequences based on the levels of 'personal' conduciveness. The path has a lot of choices, which you are not making, but You are making - that cannot be completely controlled, but regulated, for components of it are mechanical, and in the human context, limited.

It's just in my experience when I was sedated a couple times for surgery, it was just nothingness or total unawareness / unconsciousness. It can even be described because it's soooo nothing.

All of this just feels like a mystery. Whether it is the so called "sound" of a so-called "dishwasher", or the so-called "human's" so called "Search" for so-called "enlightenment". The contrast between nothingness and somethingness. I can safely say i can never know what enlightenment is or whether i have reached it or not. I mean, i could be enlightened already but wouldn't know it because i cannot see what they mean by enlightenment. All i got in the end are descriptions and stories from other people.

@Inliytened1 It's tricky, Osho put it perfectly, there is no God (noun) there is only godliness (adjective). From the awakenings I had into the nothingness, God didn't create anything, god is creation/existence. At least they are right about God not being able to be conceptualised or illustrated. Now thell them that jesus wasn't the (only) son of god and that this forum is full of prophets. I wonder if people who learn about God post-awakening would recognize their awakenings as (christian/muslim/jewish) God.

I can assure you that I haven't seen this song before a few days ago. It's a very memorable music video... especially the creepy part at the end. But it isn't that my experience had these visuals or anything. It wasn't really a visual experience at all during the death. It's more like these visuals are a metaphor for what was experienced... especially where everything dissolved into the infinite body of the Goddess in the video. So, the imagery in the video is very universal/esoteric/archetypal as I can recognize the life mother, the death mother, the magician, and the memento mori as archetypes. But the psychedelic imagery and dissolving is also relevant. I would imagine that MGMT (or whoever created the music video) has experienced ego death while on psychedelics or something like that. My experience was that my body was fragmenting and falling apart and that I died, which was not a visual experience at all. And in the fragmenting, I merged into nothingness and experienced being it. So, the radical de-centering in the video where everything merges into flowers on blackness that make up the body of the deity, felt very reminiscent of the shift in perspective that death is. But of course, neither words nor image can accurately describe it. It just has some semblance to the experience... which is why I said it was a great visual metaphor for what was experienced. I got a little shudder down my spine when I first saw it because it reminded me of it. As close to a representation of death as I've seen.

@Mannyb what even is 'material' from a non-dual paradigm? (material/immaterial, real/imaginary, this/that.. all duality) I use 'material' 'real' 'physical' etc interchangeably.. they are all imaginary duality, which must be, for any of those 'qualities' or 'limits' to mean anything. Were 'I' to be fully awake to the 'nothingness/everythingness/formlessness/infiniteness' of 'reality', there would be no 'me' who knew it.

No. Nothingness, Infinity, and Consciousness are identical. You need an awakening.

Reality is nothingness. Consciousness is a label projected onto nothingness. Nothingness and consciousness are not equal or synonyms. They're on two different levels. Nothingness is first order. Consciousness, or human experience, is second order.

It's obvious that consciousness is a concept and that it is partial and flawed. The most obvious limitation of everything is consciousness theory is that it can never explain how others and the external world exist outside of one's own bubble of reality. Consciousness is, by definition, a first person experience, and so it cannot explain a third person's experience, or even acknowledge it for that matter. How does the world continue working while you're unaware? Consciousness has nothing to do with that, obviously. This is Sam's argument. And y'all are just deflecting it with your smart ass non-dual arguments cause you're too closed-minded and identified with your position as if it's absolutely true. Yet, when you are presented with an argument as such, you will immediately go to the absolute vs. relative distinction, as if it's gonna answer anything at all. What you're actually doing is that you're just confusing your relative perspective with the absolute. But you're not aware enough to see that. And now that I'm saying that, you'll either hate me or call me names, even though I'm just telling you the truth of what you're doing. It's a tragedy that you claim open-mindedness while being dogmatic. Sam is careful at least. He's willing to admit your consciousness theory if it can resolve the 1st person vs. 3rd person contradiction. But since it can't, he doesn't admit it as absolutely true, and he's correct for that. Y'all are the deluded, naive, and closed-minded ones here. Not Sam. Now you will probably say that I don't understand what you mean cause I'm not awake or whatever, but that would make you even more confused cause you'd be disproving your own theory by the sheer fact of trying to prove it to "others". Your theory is solipsism, and it's impossible to prove. Now you will probably say that you don't claim that solipsism is true. And you will think that I've made this mistake cause I don't understand non-duality, but I have an answer for this already. You think that consciousness is the ultimate ground of reality. To you, reality IS consciousness. Right? Well, you're deluded for thinking that. Why? Because reality is unconscious when you're unconscious. So why do you think it's consciousness? I would guess that that's just a projection from the human consciousness onto reality. And that it has nothing to do with the ultimate reality, which is nothing. And I know what you're gonna say, you will say that consciousness IS nothingness, but at that point you will be just arguing semantics, cause I could call nothingness toilet paper, or bird's milk, or ox turd, or anything else. Consciousness is just a meaningless label that you're using to describe the indescribable. But since you confuse your relative perspective with the absolute truth, you will identify the indescribable as consciousness cause you're too identified with your non-dual narrative.

Ajata Project Welcome An Empty Answer You want me to “say more” about nothingness. Could anything be more paradoxical for the reader than to try to understand “nothing”? Why? Because most people start from the conviction that there is something which does exist; if nothing more, at least “me”. So, you will not likely appreciate nothingness unless you have come to realization through advaita. At least we will, then, begin without the assumption that a “me” really exists. But even for the realized advatin, there will almost certainly be a presumption that “something” exists in the realm of reality. Even “reality”. Advaita points to ajata, and ajata is about nothingness, or emptiness. The Diamond Sutra of Buddhism, points exclusively to it. Hui Neng, the Sixth Chinese Patriarch, declares flatly: ‘There is nothing from the start.” These sources, among others, set your foot on the path, but recognize that most people are then going to immediately be lost. I have written clearly about advaita, and several have understood what I’ve said. I have spoken, to some of these, about what lies beyond the “Absolute,” and a couple have understood. So I will try to explain it, as best I can. The “ultimate condition” (if any) is nothingness, the complete “absence” of anything—no thing, of any possible description. The (approximate) comprehension of this would be to conceive of “emptiness”, as the emptiness of which not anything could be emptied; pure unassociated emptiness, and not even an emptiness which is within some imagined boundaries. The word “void” could be applied; but this “actuality” is not void of something—in any positive sense. So the nothingness of which we speak is totally empty, free of any subtlety which could even be envisioned. Hence there is not anything “within” it that can be subject to any kind of movement, or even change. Not anything can “come from” nothingness, nor “return” to it. It is not the “origin” of anything. In fact, it could not be applicable to say that it exists, or does not exist. Thus we can’t say that this is the “beginning” condition or the “ending” condition. At best, we could say that (if it were “existent”) it would be the ever-present condition. Yet, it is not an abstraction: its presence is “eternal”. “In” its presence are supposed creatures, and the world and universe they seem to inhabit. But all of these supposed things are “in” nothingness. They have not appeared from nothingness, or out of nothingness, or because of nothingness. In fact, they have not actually “appeared”, except as nothingness. The creatures take their reality, their “existence”, for granted; and thus also the reality or existence of the world and its universe—not knowing that they are nothing. The assumption is: ‘There was a time when I didn’t exist, a time when I existed, and a time when I will no longer exist”. But there are no such times. Not anything has ever “existed”, from the standpoint of nothingness. In nothingness, there is no “time”. What makes this so difficult to understand, is that because we say that “I have existed”, we conclude that there is some thing. And indeed we look around and say there are other things, such as a world or a universe. But the presumption that there was a time when I did not exist (or do; or will not exist) is false: no arising, abiding or decaying exists in nothingness. In other words, not anything “happens” in nothingness. “We” are nothing, the “world” is nothing, the “universe” is nothing. In nothingness, there is neither existence nor nonexistence. There is only nothing. From the standpoint of nothingness, no questions can arise. We can not ask for, nor expect, an explanation: not anything ever happens, in nothingness. The value of this understanding is that not anything really matters. Even understanding this does not matter. All is emptiness. That is the “empty” answer. The scriptures speak of one who is in sahaja samadhi as having “no mind” or an “empty mind”. It is this appreciation of nothingness that is referred to. - Ajata Project (Robert Wolfe)

It was the most intense for sure. But I suppose profundity and intensity are two different things. All were profound. The first two were beautiful and pleasant. But the latter was very intense and very bad trip by any measure. So, I've had three very profound Ayahuasca experiences. But the latter reminds me of this video... though it wasn't a visual experience at all. The first two were amazing experiences of being grounded in one-ness and getting some distance from my ego and a dropping away of suffering and fear. And an immersion in a kind of love that I can relate to as a human being. They were profound in a way that was grounded within Maya. And I was able to see all the little ways that I would self-deceive and a bunch of other psychological happenings that I was previously unconscious to. I can say that these were experiences of the merging of the human and divine and to recognize the divinity in the mundane. The third was very different. It was all about death and emptiness... very much akin to what I pointed out within the video. It was like being pulled behind so many veils. And then my body was falling apart. And I died and merged with the nothingness from which the everythingness springs. And I was this nothingness, and I intimately experienced and understood all the connections between everything in the infinite existence all in one instant (though time was not a thing... nor was sensing nor understanding). I knew things and remember knowing things that I can't possibly understand now. And I both was and wasn't able to handle everything in infinity. And as I (God) had a hard time experiencing the elements of infinity that included suffering, I (God) who was impervious to suffering would wrap around myself and comfort me (God), and in a moment things would resolve and there would be peace. And then I (God) would wake back up the the infitine nature of my existence and I (God) would panic and freak out... then I (God) would wrap around myself again and comfort me (God) and I (God) would understand an infinite amount of connections and comfort me (God) again. And this kept happening, until I (God) felt unable to handle it. I (God) had to surrender to the fact that I (God) needed mercy and a reprieve from my infinite nature as I (God) longed for the experience of finiteness. And then, I began to remember Emerald. And I (God) made a conscious decision to live as Emerald and to experience this finite story line and to surrender to my humanity and to relinquish seeking to transcend or get rid of my finite nature. It was clear to me then, that the intention for my life was to exist fully as human as that was the experience that I (God) wanted to have.

Yes consciousness is attributeless, obviously. A.k.a. nothingness. (But not literal nothing.)

I'll write about my experiences with 5meo and kriya, and baseline daytime changes in awareness. My first trip was in the beginning of September followed by another one 3 weeks later that was a breakthrough. 15 mg was extraordinary, utterly amazing, but felt not like a breakthrough. But still, a strong sense of 'wow', 'how the fuck', and the like. Falling asleep I had recurring events when I started to fall asleep at night that mirrored the peak of the experience, my visual field got very white. I should also mention that some days I used melatonin to help adjust sleep schedule when it felt I wanted to wake up earlier than usual or to re-adjust to an earlier time-schedule. Melatonin for sure has a potentiating effect for me on these recurring events that mimic 5MeO peaks. As for my consciousness level during the first week I didn't feel much of a difference, but somewhere during the 2nd week after my trip I started noticing something weird and new during kriya pranayama - I felt as though my arms started to grow apart, like there was huge distance between them, at the same time not really feeling my body, almost like it was super silent, and diffuse. I was aware of the progression described in Ingram's MCTB from effortful one-pointedness, effortless one-pointedness, to diffuse peripheral attention and later a synthesis of both. I felt prana moving but weakly, and sometimes I feel that I am not moving anything at all but my 'intentionality' along my spine. I also noticed a shift in consciousness during my daily activities when walking around, commuting etc, aware of awareness, like a lightless light and I guess this is where self-inquiry points towards? On some mornings after waking up during the first weeks I struggled to kickstart my day, journal-meditate-go-to-gym-to-study etc and would just sit at my computer listening to music videos, and there was this utter astonishment that anything like this was possible, profound, painful gratitude and disbelief, like the fact that anything at all is, is too much for me, I would basically just listen to music eyes wide-opened and cry in disbelief. I didn't like it since I had other plans (I as in me, the ego) for the day than to sit and do nothing but be. 18 mg felt very silent at first, was still in a fractal space, but felt very detached. After some time when the peak started to arrive there was a sense of 'lol, this is crazy, undescribably insane, and how insane can this go?' and a concentration into one point, and I remember that there was a falling sensation and it was very white aswell. It felt like nothingness, 'undefined'ness. It was a long time ago now, I don't really have adequate words for it. I remembered as I was 'falling' I began an extremely loud moan, like holy shit here I come! Pretty much an existential orgasm lol. After the peak though immediately fear, confusion, and a sense of 'holy shit, I think I'm in hell and I can't even imagine the terror and pain I am going to go through', and then idk, it seemed like I began to 'chase' after something, I started to vocalize words that didn't mean anything, but were astonishing all the same, it kept me curious, and distracted, which I felt like I needed to keep me away from the intense feeling of fear. After sometime of this I was back to ordinary state, but really fucking disturbed to the latter part of the trip, disturbed but equanimous at the same time, like whatever, that was an interesting turn of events. It was also very interesting how fast and how abrubtly ignorance set in after the peak and I was completely confused as to what the peak experience was. Looking back at it, I was still aware of this existential terror, but pushed it far away and was in denial of what it meant, I didn't understand it anymore. I read SantataGamanas books on Kriya and Kundalini and started to adopt his simpler pranayama along with breath retention practice and kriya bow aswell as maha mudra. My practice consisted of breath retention practice (avg 60-90s), kriya bow, maha mudra 3x, pranayama (108 reps at first, later dropped to 72 and 36) and yoni mudra and also being in the after poise for however I felt like. I should also say that my technique was more organic-inner guru than doing everything specifically correct. for example during pranayama I would feel like I want to focus on crown chakra for some time and then follow up on third eye again for the remainder and felt a difference. It's as if focusing on third eye had more of an emptiness-nothingness feel to it, while focusing on crown was very white - energetic, and orgasmic in a calm and peaceful way. This is where I stepped into some freaky and spooky territory and started having strange experiences. When going by my day, aware of awareness, sometimes it felt very expansive, enormous, peaceful, full of joy but equanimous. Like my field of experiences was filled with a blazing lightless light. It lasted how long it lasted until I fell back to usual consciousness. It seemed as though my kriya experience took off in its own directions aswell, I remember once when I felt really horny and was curious and focused in on this during pranayama and yoni mudra and felt really fucking evil, like I would fuck, destroy, and do anything to get what I wanted to, whatever it was (scary as fuck, but I enjoyed it). Another time I managed to experience samadhi. Walls crushing the objects in my field of consciousness and sense of self together, whatever 'I' was disappeared, best way to describe that was that 'I' simply wasn't there, or that everything was 'I', like everywhere where you looked, heard, felt, was a mirror reflecting 'me'. The freakiest experience was a few months ago during yoni mudra out-breath when it was as if I started 'falling into nothing', very reminiscent of 5MeO experience. Also some dreams felt like awakenings, the first time it happened there was a sudden surge of fear and terror with immediately waking up to it, but I soon realized what had 'happened' and shrugged it off laughingly. In another dream I was riding my bike along a beach balcony or something an had the same shift of consciousness, but this time I let go of my bike and fell arms wide as the dream collapsed into me, kind of like a wall would accelerate and smash into you. Also a dream of me chasing a volleyball I accidentally kicked into the forest, only that the volleyball never seemed to be where I thought it would be. I mean like looking back at these dreams they seem so cartoonishly obvious as to what they point towards lol, at the time I dreamed they seemed very serious. It's not all sunshine though. Some days were quite up-and-down aswell, after kriya session sometimes it took a while to readjust to whatever I had planned for the day. Work, even just cooking food, talking to other people felt really shit, I would feel like doing absolutely nothing during the day. And it was noticeable as people commented on my state. Other days I felt super resistant to doing kriya but pushed myself into it and usually would feel great afterwards. The last two months though have been especially difficult. Some days I felt really fatigued psychologically after gym and kriya session that I basically did nothing but procrastinate on it. I have a low effort job connected to my Master's thesis that covered my basic financial needs and saved some aswell, but it felt like it didn't matter if I showed up at all or did anything at all. Going there and doing anything, talking with anyone around there felt psychologically fatiguing. I did LP course aswell during the months and managed to get some success and insight about myself, and what I wanted to do, though it got more-and-more difficult to focus on figuring out my desires, and do the exercises. I've followed up on everything except vision board, I am not sure anymore whether or not I feel resistant to it, or that my goals and desires feel meaningless, even though. I also feel like my me-sheet was adequate, but still not quite right.

I don’t believe in the devil or any kind of separate entity that is pure evil. This excerpt from the Ridhwan library is one of my favorite on the subject but there are some more that’s worth reading over. All Spiritual Work Would be Pointless if There Were Such a Thing as Ultimate Evil As we have seen, each Holy Idea is a characteristic of reality at all locations, at all times, and at all levels. Holy Truth explicates this understanding. Here, we are saying that not only is reality just one presence that is boundless and real, but that it is also positive, blissful, and wonderful. So not only is God one, but God is also wonderful and made of love. The truth, then, is loving and lovable, which is why we say in the Diamond Approach that you must love truth for its own sake. If your orientation is that you love truth so that it will change you and make you a happier person, your orientation is out of sync with how things objectively are; if you see reality as it is, you can’t help but love it. It follows, then, that objectively there is no evil. We see evil only when we perceive reality through a filter. A person who behaves in what we consider evil ways is a person acting through a distortion. In spiritual work, concepts of a devil, of dark forces, of some evil that exists on its own outside of the goodness of reality are considered manifestations of ignorance, both in terms of believing in such concepts and in terms of the manifestations attributed to such forces. All spiritual work would be pointless if there were such a thing as ultimate evil. Facets of Unity, pg. 215 There are 3 more excerpts about evil at this link. https://www.diamondapproach.org/glossary/refinery_phrases/evil For whatever it’s worth, I believe our own ego or separate sense of self is the Devil. I was reflecting today on how I try again and again to be respectful of others, nonviolent and basically passive in the face of others transgressions but inevitably I end up reacting at some point. Sometimes just in small ways. Maybe becoming a little negative and saying something kind of smart ass which does no good at all or every now and then completely forgetting myself and acting like a complete dick. Having to face this recurring part of my ego helps me to get in touch with my own nothingness. If that makes any sense. Maurice Nicoll in Gems of Wisdom has many good quotes around this subject. https://inner-world-books.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/Gems_of_Wisdom.pdf NEGATIVE STATES II “In dealing with negative states, look at the ‘I’ in you and not at the person with whom you are negative. The real cause of the negative state is the ‘I’ that is speaking in you...Its only object is to make you negative and absorb as much of your force as it can. Every negative ‘I’ has only one purpose—to get hold of you and feed upon you and strengthen itself at your expense.” V. 1, p. 162 ATTRACTING HELP “It is a necessary part of this Work that everyone must eventually pass, to see in himself by sincere observation, how he clings to his negative emotions with one hand and tries to free himself with the other. The Work inevitably leads everyone to the same places and the same experiences. A man must reach the point of discerning his own helplessness—of realizing his own mechanicalness. And this, if it is not a negative experience, will bring him into a state of self-remember- ing. Through seeing his helplessness he attracts help.” V. 1, p.85 TRANSFORMING IMPRESSIONS V “How can a man bring the work up to the place of incoming impressions? In brief, by remembering the work emotionally. The more a man through right self-observation feels his own helplessness, the more he realizes his ignorance, the more he sees his mechanicalness and that he is a machine, the more he perceives his own utter nothingness, the more emotional will the work become in him.” V. 1, p. 58 I remember my father at times and how he had the patience for the most part to suffer fools gladly as the saying goes. He left this earth 15 years ago but with the help of my memories of his character he still teaches me at times.

@Nahm I don't know what you mean by me-ism. My experience is real. even if it has the substance of a dream. Me is nothingness as a structure, and other objects/perceptions as it's contents. Lower self may be an illusory identity, but still an experience, which may not make it necessarily true but it exists.

@Moksha Well because the illusory thing that was projected within me, the ego, was also projected within other-selves, but the fact that my self was illusory and the nothingness, means that other-selves are also illusory. However, there is no direct perception/evidence of the other-self being sentient, just the projection of my ego into other people, which was destroyed by the insight into no-thing-ness of the self. I'm not sure everyone is on the same page here. Intuitively I would say panpsychism (top down). From pure perception I can only say Solipsism, and from wishful thinking: idealism. It's not clear to me (yet). I wonder if it is clear to you guys. If there is any doubt.

@Moksha Yeah well nothingness within me came with a mirror of no-thing-ness in other-selves. Well it was long ago, I'll ask the solipsism question when god shoves his grace down my throat again @Kalo I used materialism to show that matter (and time) influences contents of consciousness and to compare materialism with bottom-up panpsychism. Because Materialism can be true IF you include consciousness in as the most fundamental thing within objective reality.

Everyone agrees that matter (no matter if it is or isn't the structure of reality) can influence consciousness OR the content of consciousness, if you say that time is a content of consciousness (illusory or not). Like Sam harris said in the interview with rupert sipra, anaesthesia influences the continuity of consciousness. Rupert sipra said that it didn't. THAT I don't understand. Continuity has nothing to do with objective time? Or is continuity still continuity between falling asleep and waking up, because there is no experience during "sleep". If idealism is true, consciousness creates and manipulates matter. Every living being is a conscious agent and their consciousness fuels the existence of it's content including matter and the whole universe. Infinite timelines and infinite universes? The mandela effect is possible with this worldview. Mandela died in prison in some timelines and mandela became president in other timelines. Consciousness decides the "objective" reality the soul lives in. Panpsychism (top-down) is basically infinite mind, so I guess you guys are on board with the idea that we are the universe (God) splitting itself and experiencing itself. Panpsychism bottom up, is basically materialism with consciousness at it's base, which I guess means the same thing as top-down, just from a different/objective perspective. Solipsism is basically Idealism, everyone has their own timeline and happenings, the higher self creates everything INCLUDING seemingly conscious agents which aren't conscious, just contents of the dream, meat-robots. From my awakenings, IF I HAD to construct a metaphysical worldview without thinking about it, it would be a mix from pan-psychism and solipsism, Solipsism with the only distinction, that I am nothing, exactly like the other conscious agents. However, I refuse to believe that other agents aren't conscious, even though they are no-thing. I cannot know that, you probably can't either. What from what I said is true, what is BS? Do we share a dream, which varies for every conscious agent? Are YOU the only conscious agent, and this text is just your higher self summoning it? "It's a dream", well a solipsistic one, an idealistic one or a panpsychist one? That reality has the substance of a dream, doesn't mean I am the only conscious angent even though it SEEMS that way. Can you know that this experience is NOT solipsistic? Or does it go up to solipsism and the rest you have to assume? Enlighten my metaphysical hypothesis of the world, before I taste the nothingness again.

Herein lies the highest knowledge that can ever be possessed brought to you in humble arrogance by my human identity. The unchanging Truth is that all there is is experience/awareness/consciousness. This experience/awareness/consciousness changes constantly which is the Truth of impermanence. Without impermanence, infinity is impossible. God’s permanent nature is impermanence. This is true because God is not an identity. GOD IS. Period. Done. YOU ARE. Period. Done. GOD IS = YOU ARE. Human you will wither away within YOU. Even if the flesh and bone deification of “God” exists and controls phenomena in any way he wants as a seemingly separate being in your direct experience, you have to realize that YOU are the actual and only GOD that can ever exist. The deity is an aspect of your experience, if you even ever experience such a thing. The Buddha himself had direct experience of devas/deities, but he realized that deities are NEVER actual GOD. So did my human ego about a month ago. What YOU are creates any deities, ghosts, deformed and decapitated midgets singing with the voice of Elvis Presley, etc. that is experienced as well as it creates the non-experience of all of those things at given times. YOU are the totality of everything experienced always, but recognize that YOU are not experiencing multiple consciousnesses. Multiple consciousnesses are LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE. CONSCIOUSNESS IS ALWAYS ONE NO MATTER IF IT SEES THROUGH THE EYES OF MULTIPLE BEINGS AT ONCE OR SEES A COMPLETELY BLACK SCREEN WITH NO SENSATIONS. Many Buddhists say there is no God. It doesn’t matter. What they are perpetually swimming in is GOD for ETERNITY. They simply might not call it GOD, but the good ones will see there is no difference between calling it GOD or nothing or NOTHINGNESS or any other label you can put on it. TRUTH = GOD = YOU = WHAT IS DIRECTLY EXPERIENCED IN THE PRESENT MOMENT.

The unchanging Truth is that all there is is experience/awareness/consciousness. This experience/awareness/consciousness changes constantly which is the Truth of impermanence. Without impermanence, infinity is impossible. God’s permanent nature is impermanence. This is true because God is not an identity. GOD IS. Period. Done. YOU ARE. Period. Done. GOD IS = YOU ARE. Human you will wither away within YOU. Even if the flesh and bone deification of “God” exists and controls phenomena in any way he wants as a seemingly separate being in your direct experience, you have to realize that YOU are the actual and only GOD that can ever exist. The deity is an aspect of your experience, if you even ever experience such a thing. The Buddha himself had direct experience of devas/deities, but he realized that deities are NEVER actual GOD. So did my human ego about a month ago. What YOU are creates any deities, ghosts, deformed and decapitated midgets singing with the voice of Elvis Presley, etc. that is experienced as well as it creates the non-experience of all of those things at given times. YOU are the totality of everything experienced always, but recognize that YOU are not experiencing multiple consciousnesses. Multiple consciousnesses are LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE. CONSCIOUSNESS IS ALWAYS ONE NO MATTER IF IT SEES THROUGH THE EYES OF MULTIPLE BEINGS AT ONCE OR SEES A COMPLETELY BLACK SCREEN WITH NO SENSATIONS. Many Buddhists say there is no God. It doesn’t matter. What they are perpetually swimming in is GOD for ETERNITY. They simply might not call it GOD, but the good ones will see there is no difference between calling it GOD or nothing or NOTHINGNESS or any other label you can put on it. TRUTH = GOD = YOU = WHAT IS DIRECTLY EXPERIENCED IN THE PRESENT MOMENT.

I had seen people talking about their experiences with psychedelic and 5-MEO-dmt and telling that it was a fantastic feeling to be died and basically experience God So if it feels like that to be temporarily died and experience those things (I'm not saying that everyone will experience it) Is it than possible that humans who dies physically and basically for ever, will be in that state or what ever you call it and basically do they turn back into the form of nothingness where they came from? Offcurse it isn't possible to say because who ever dies he is just gone and you can't ask them what it's like to be death But with things like 5MEO do we can predict how it's going to be look like after every humans dies? Is it than possible to say that some religious were right about the life after death?