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He faked his own suicide/death once or twice, worrying his friends and family, he also ended up in a psych ward and posted Instagram stories about it making fun of the whole situation. He justifies all those incidents saying its does it "just to get peoples attention". The actual "enlightenment" content is good, but you have dig through click-bait, trollish behavior and viral toxicity to get to it.

I think Giuliani has gone crazy. He did political suicide. Completely lost his marbles. ?

Ha! Well played! Although, I did not tell you to go and kill yourself. Notice that you created that scenario where you were told to commit suicide, out of fear for your life or whatever. What I said exactly was that I told you to stop fearing death. Just the feeling of fear that you have, but seem to be unaware of. Don't tell me that you don't fear death, because you do, even more than I do, I can guarantee that. If you can live your life fearlessly, you will be God. That is, if you can. But I challenge you to do that. For example, can you go and tell a girl that you just saw that you want to have sex with her? If you can't, that's because you are afraid. Now apply the same rule for everything that you want but are unable to have, and contemplate the feelings that arise. Eventually, you will realize how fear is running your entire life. Your attitude does not sound optimal, though. So idk, maybe my message won't get through, but anyway, try to keep an open mind.

4546 4547 Q: Well were some of the scared - was there s- fear in you that people were 4548 gonna find out about your relationship, too? 4549 4550 A: No, I didn’t even care about that at that point. 4551 4552 Q: At that point, there was n-... 4553 4554 A: I was just, like... 4555 4556 Q: Okay. 4557 4558 A: ...scared, like, of the situation. It was just, like, getting escalated and it was 4559 freaking me out. And he was just, like, not - he was strange. So another thing - 4560 so that was Tuesday. And that was it for Tuesday but I forgot some stuff on 4561 Monday that I did need to bring up to you guys. So Monday, um, when we 4562 were on the phone, at one point he mentioned to me - I can’t even believe I 4563 have to say this. She left her wedding ring here and I said something along the 4564 lines of, “Does that mean you two are done?” And he was like - uh, oh my 4565 God. He said, “How much do you think it’s worth?” And I r- like, remember 4566 hearing him say that and being like, “What the fuck?”And I remember 4567 thinkin’ to myself, like, “I don’t even know how to respond to this.” And so I 4568 was like, “I don’t know. Pawn it, man.” And I was just, like - I was like, “I 4569 pawn jewelry all the time.” I was like, “I pawned jewelry a few times.” I was 4570 like, “It’s not worth shit though.” And I was like, “So I don’t know if you 4571 really wanna do that.” And he’s like, “No. No. I think I’m gonna get it 4572 appraised. It’s a nice rock.” And I was just like, “Okay.” And it was, like, 4573 really awkward. And then he, like... 4574 4575 Q: And that was on Monday? 4576 4577 A: That was on Monday night. And that, to me, was, like - it was kinda strange. 4578 And then the Tuesday lying thing - like, I’m telling you, it started, like, 4579 Monday night, him saying that, that was why I couldn’t sleep. ‘Cause he made 4580 the comment about the wedding ring. 4581 4582 Q: Okay. 4583 4584 A: And then Tuesday, her still not comin’ home and then him lyin’ to me. And I 4585 was just like, “Oh my God. Oh my God. Like, what if something happened?” 4586 And it was, like, really hard for me to put... 4587 4588 Q: When - when you say, “What - what if something happened?” what were you 4589 thinking? 4591 A: Like, what if somebody took her? Like, could he possibly hurt her? And that 4592 was, like, the first time that I really, I think, genuinely considered, “Did this 4593 man hurt his wife?” And it was, like, hard for me to grasp. And, uh, I thought 4594 about it a lot and I - I waited for the night ‘cause I wanted to see if she would 4595 come home. And it was already pretty late. And I had company and I was just, 4596 like, “Let me just see how this plays out.” And, um, my buddy (Jim) left, I 4597 don’t know, probably, like, 9:00 or 10:00. Probably just, like, the same time 4598 he always leaves. And then, um, I couldn’t sleep then. It was really bad. And I 4599 woke up in the morning and I saw the interview that he had with the 4600 newspapers. And he just looked really different to me. 4601 4602 Q: How so? 4603 4604 A: The white in his eyes is gone. They’re, like, a different color now. It’s like he 4605 has no soul. I swear to God. I saw it and I was just like, “Look at his eyes.” I 4606 saw his mugshot. They’re not even the same color. Like, when you guys 4607 retrieve the pictures that are on my phone, look at his eyes then compared to 4608 now. Like, it’s the scariest shit I think I’ve ever seen in my life. It freaked me 4609 out. I was like, “That’s not even the same man that I know.” And it was really 4610 uncomfortable. Um, but anyways I saw that report in the morning and I was 4611 just to the point where I was just like, “All right. Like, something happened.” 4612 This woman is missing. Whether it was him or someone else, I know, like, a 4613 woman went missing not too long ago in Longmont. Like, I think it was, like, 4614 two months ago or something like that. And you guys - not you guys. But 4615 somebody up there called off the search on her. I don’t think they ever found 4616 her. So I was like, “I don’t know, maybe that’s connected, maybe somebody 4617 came and got her. Maybe he did something. I don’t know.” But I knew, like, it 4618 was a problem. And at this point, I was like, “I’m in a very messy situation 4619 with this man. And I don’t know what to do.” And so I called my dad ‘cause 4620 he’s, like, the only person that I trust with everything in the whole world and I 4621 was just like, “I have a problem.” And I told him everything and my - I was 4622 like - we just discussed it and it was like, “We need to go to cops.” Definitely. 4623 Because I figured you guys would find me eventually but I was like, “I feel 4624 like they need to speak to me. I feel like I’m a very important person for you 4625 guys to communicate with.” 4626 4627 Q: You are. 4628 4629 A: And so, you know - and again, I wish I’d have done it sooner but it just, like - 4630 it just kinda took the sequence of events of his lies and all of his bullshit 4631 falling apart for me to process that I needed to address the situation. And so - 4632 you know, and the time. And so that, to me - and another thing he lied to me 4633 on I caught him on Monday night, he was like - oh it was right after the 4634 wedding ring thing. He was talkin’ about - it might’ve been before. One of the 4635 two. But he was - he was, like, talkin’ about how, um - he, like, reflected on 4636 North Carolina and he was talkin’ about how he wanted the separation and all 4637 this stuff. And I’m like, “Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. I 4638 thought you were the one tryin’ to make peace with her and she’s the one who 4639 didn’t want it.” He’s like, “No, I wanted it.” And I was just like, “Okay.” And 4640 another thing on Monday night, his breathing was, like - uh, it was like his 4641 voice would crack sometimes. But I didn’t, like, condemn him for anything 4642 like that because I was like, “Well yeah, he’s probably stressed the hell out. 4643 His family’s gone,” you know what I’m saying? 4644 4645 Q: Sure. 4646 4647 A: So I don’t know. So that happened. And then, um... 4648 4649 Q: He never made any admissions to you about anything that he had done? 4650 4651 A: Nope. 4652 4653 Q: Um, he never said anything about doing - or at any time, not - not just in these 4654 days but during your relationship, did he ever say anything about hurting his 4655 wife, his children? 4656 4657 A: Never. Never. 4658 4659 Q: Did - in - in - on these conversations from Monday to Tuesday, um, did he 4660 ever say that, um, you know, somebody did something to them? Or did he 4661 ever give s- uh - um, an excuse to you how this could’ve happened? 4662 4663 A: No. I mean, he - he was... 4664 4665 Q: Other than they just were goin’ to a friend’s house. 4666 4667 A: Yeah, or he was like, “Yeah, I think she’s, like, with one of her friends. She 4668 doesn’t wanna talk to me,” kinda thing. 4669 4670 Q: So... 4671 4672 A: But other than that, no. I mean, like, he told me, like, “Yeah, she said she was 4673 with another man. But I think it was out of spite.” Like, he never really, like, 4674 held that she was with another dude. Like, sh- he never was like, “Yeah, she’s 4675 with some guy.” Like, she said it but I don’t think she meant it. 4676 4677 Q: Mm-hm. 4678 4679 A: Is kinda what he was, like, directing towards me. But no, he - I think that’s 4680 why I gave him the benefit of the doubt so long. Like, he has always been 4681 such a civil, gentle man to me. And he’s always been pretty calm and, like, 4682 levelheaded when he talks about the d- like, the differences between him and 4683 his wife. And I mean, that’s a sensitive subject. And he never, ever seemed 4684 like he was, like, aggressive about it. I mean, he was always just, like, chill. 4685 And he never talked ill of his children. He was always so bubbly about them. 4686 Like, those were his babies. So when all this happened, I was just like, “What 4687 the fuck?” And... 4688 4689 Q: S- so that brings me to a question real quick. I mean, you got - you - I don’t 4690 think anybody over the last six or eight weeks knows this dude better than - 4691 than you. I really don’t. You guys probably spent more time together than 4692 anybody. 4693 4694 A: Mm-hm. 4695 4696 Q: Um, conversation, whatever. Relationship. Um, what do you think - the - 4697 what’s the catalyst for this event? Do you have any - have you had - and I - I 4698 know it’s a hard question but I wanna get it out now we’re here. If - if there’s 4699 a thought that you have, um, that might lead us to understand a little bit why 4700 he might’ve done something like this, um - like I said, I don’t - I met Chris on 4701 - on Wednesday. Um, so I don’t know Chris. Not like you do. 4702 4703 A: Um, you know, I’ve thought about this. And sometimes I think to myself if I 4704 wasn’t in that man’s life, would his family still be alive? And I’ve thought 4705 about this a lot. And I think I can give myself different responses. But in all 4706 honesty, I think they might be alive but not permanently. I do not think that 4707 this man just snapped. I don’t think that he just met some fuckin’ amazing 4708 woman and he was just gonna try to fuckin’ murder his family and then think 4709 that I was okay with, like, building a relationship with somebody who did 4710 something like that. Like, at what fucking point, you know? And not only that, 4711 like, I always try to say, you know, like, “When we get to a point where we’ve 4712 been together long enough, I would love to meet your children.” Like, I never 4713 (discluded) them from anything. Like, I remember comin’ back from 4714 Colorado Springs and I was like, “Oh my God, they got the Cheyenne Zoo 4715 down here. You gotta take your kids. And, like, the - you can feed the giraffes 4716 and they would love it.” Like, I always tried to, like, in- like, show him cool 4717 things like, “Hey, man, would your kids like this? ‘Cause my nephew would 4718 like this. Like, check this out.” You know? Like, I sent him a screenshot of 4719 some rainbow u- unicorn Lucky Charms the other day. I was like, “Do your 4720 daughters know about these? ‘Cause I bet these are epic.” Like, little things 4721 like that where it’s like - like, genuinely - like, I care. I do. Like, despite how 4722 messy this is and how I’m sure I’m gonna be portrayed in the media and 4723 everything, like, I care about, like, his wellbeing with his children and all of 4724 that. And so for me, like, when I think of, “What was he - going through his 4725 head?” I find it really hard to believe that I am the catalyst for all of this. I will 4726 be willing to say that I think me being in his life accelerated what was 4727 inevitably about to happen. But I don’t think people just snap. Love does not 4728 murder. Hate and resentment murder. That’s the way I look at that. I do not 4729 know what is the truth anymore and what’s not and I don’t have all of the 4730 details. But this is just my, like, opinion but I’m pretty convinced that that 4731 woman and him did not get along very well and the reason they stuck together 4732 was, “Hey we’re gonna do kids.” And I think they also stuck together because 4733 they were in a very bad financial bind. And I think that she continuously 4734 disregarded it. And I think he messed up because he was too passive to say 4735 anything to her about it and really address it. And it just got to the point where 4736 it’s just like, you file bankruptcy and then what do you do? Just wait 'til you 4737 file the next one? I don’t know. I don’t know what their finances look like 4738 now but from the way it made it sound, it’s probably a pretty stark situation. 4739 And I don’t know if hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt over and over 4740 and over again are enough to lead a man to, like, wanna take somebody out 4741 but I don’t know. I’ve heard of people committing suicide over that shit 4742 before. And I would never justify what he did. I think it’s fuckin’ disgusting. 4743 It’s - ugh. Like, he’s such a fuckin’ pig. But I just - I try to, like, be like, 4744 “Why?” I try to come up with the why. And I really think that he was 4745 struggling with her really bad and not only that, he’s got a third child on the 4746 way and I know he was probably just like, “I can’t fucking afford a third kid.” 4747 Wants it but can’t afford it, you know? And he always told me he, like, 4748 wanted a little boy. You know? He wanted a third child. 4749 4750 Q: Mm-hm. 4751 4752 A: And so I think that it was just something like I think they were in a financial 4753 situation and I think she was very non-responsive to him trying to - to, like, 4754 solve problems and, like, get out of the situations that they were in. And I 4755 think people just get complacent is what it is. And then, you know, I think, uh, 4756 he met me and I think I was, like, a breath of fresh air for him where it was 4757 like, he could get away and just be like, “You know what? I can be myself. I 4758 don’t have to worry about money right now.” Like, you know, and this girl, 4759 like” - I have my shit together. Like, my life is so, like, very in order. 4760 4761 Q: You seem very, uh, organized and independent and dialed in for a 30 y... 4762 4763 A: Always. Like, I do really good at - I do really good at work, I have, like, 4764 almost a perfect credit score. I’ve been savin’ money for a house. Like, I don’t 4765 mess around. I mean, I did. I screwed up. This is, like, my one screw up ever 4766 and it’s about to be on, like, n- national news. But, um, just very dialed in. 4767 And I think it was, like, a breath of fresh air for him to, like, be around 4768 something like that because I don’t think that he knew that that was, like, a 4769 real thing. And he had told me that, like, numerous times. Like, “I didn’t 4770 know, like, women like you, like, existed.” I was just like, “All right.” Like, I

@Leo Gura I have determined mahasamadhi is impossible because causing emotional harm to your family members through suicide under the premise that something good will happen to you. It is selfish.

@Twega How old are you bro? (18-22?) Guess what, almost everyone screwed up too. Many people ended up in jail. Some for crimes they didn't even commit. Some people just got runover by a drunk. Some ended up committing suicide. Many got brainwashed in to settling for wage slavery for ever, no higher vision horizon in their periphery, just sights of a stable boring job & a mortgage. You didn't really screw up. What you have ahead of you is a gift. You are free, young, educated it seems. The world is your oyster. Leo has extremely high standards. Maybe you screwed up according to his standards, but it's pretty common. But you what I'm actually a hypocrite. I keep thinking how I should be on route to being a millionaire by now. Almost mid twenties & I have nothing but some faith.

Where would you map these Archetypes on the Spiral Dynamics model? I would say: Worrior is at Red and Orange Lover is at Blue and Green Magician is at Green/Yellow/Turquoise King is at Yellow/Turquoise I plan to structure my Instagram account with these 2 concepts where I will teach through them. I plan to have different costumes, symbols, and colors on my videos etc. For example: Video about Discipline: I will teach it through Orange and Worrior Video about Meditation: I will teach it through King. So in this case King is combination of Worrior and Lover (Orange and Green) . I want to convince orange to meditate by telling them how it will increase their productivity, discipline and words that appeal to orange and then finish up with green mix where all this outward success is all about love and connection (in an orange sort of way) . Video about Patience: I will teach it thorough King ( Let me just note that I will not limit myself with this concepts, I will structure my acc so I could do and be who ever I want) . So because I will hit Orange hard in the begging (I want to integrate it) , the video about Patience (King) will communicate that even though we need massive action , we also need space for love, for relaxation, because you are more productive this way(in this case, man is stuck in masculine energy) etc. And if you can't relax, and you are in your head all the time then it means you have problems with feminine energy, and you will learn about it through Lover archetype etc... I will post a video that I shut half a year ago when I started experimenting with this idea, just for you to get a sense of what Im talking about (it is way better now hue hue). People in my city still think that Im crazy LOL (their criticism made me grow so much) It is about toxic Red/Blue. I shoot another video where I explained Red entering Blue. In 0;56 I speak in English It is a line from Pulp Fiction hehe I will mix in music, photography, film, acting etc. on my Instagram also. It will be short entertaining videos, especially The Magician Archetype hehe ! (I designed Integration map for myself...Bravo Eddie, how cleaver!) Here is my Instagram if you want to follow the amazing transformation (realizng LP) and what I will achieve in one year : https://www.instagram.com/alhemija21veka/ Stage Orange Picture: https://www.instagram.com/p/CGVf8wblp8I/ What do you guys think about all this above? Do you have any ideas that you want to share? This is kinda separate from the post above, but, what do you think about this perspective? Until two years ago I had no education whatsoever.I was walking through life with all sorts of addictions like : video games, alcohol, porn, weed and many more etc. And this way of living (which was led by traumas and toxic culture)made me to the point of big depression and contemplating suicide. This suffering and closedmindedness triggered a full circle. I became radically openminded. This is why Im everywhere on the spiral right now in just two years. So I have two ideas here: 1. Most of the people who are "educated" (Blue/Orange) in Serbia are very closed minded because: they already think they know if they are questioned about their beliefs from above which is rare ( Healthy Orange , Green) they lash out if they are questioned about their beliefs from below, they have already made up answer that reinforces their beliefs when they "win" the argument etc 2. But people who are uneducated, and are ready to get out of the rut (like me in a way).They will be radically open minded because the things they will learn will generate results they didn't have their whole life ( basic orange stuff ), just like I discovered self-help. It was new world for me. And in my case my traumas didn't heal until I started Shadow-Work, but my traumas forced me to work on myself, and when I found out that money and aprrovel(im generalizing) doesn't heal me I was forced into Green and Yellow, which would not be possible if I didn't had that trauma and haven't find Leo. So my point here is: Uneducated traumatized 25 year old will have more potential for selfacutalization then "educated"(some sort of degree) 25 year old. Does that make any sense? It is generalization I know, but my old friends that are stuck in the rut, are now becoming more openminded(because of my example) and willing to learn then my orange friends who have good jobs, cars, way healthier life style they will believe me (not everyone of-course...most of them will not, most of them will demonize me... Im talking about potential selfactualizesers) and do the work Traumas are big motivators for growth if you survive the crash in the first place For example now ! I still have problems with Fe - Ti loop . And this trauma of what people will think about what I typed in this post forces me to explore other people perscpectives, which means... to explore myself. You see?

There are too many dangers to list them all: Rape, abuse, molestation, perversion, enslavement, sex trafficking, exploitation and manipulation Pregnancy, abortion, miscarriage Diseases Cheating Heartache, depression, suicide Jealousy, envy Reputation, gossip, slander Illegitimate heirs and bastard children Embarrassment Addiction, attachment Fear, worry Financial concerns Lost friendships, broken family bonds Interferes with workplace duties, interferes with family duties, interferes with spiritual duties Etc. Small tribal life is very different from modern society. A small tribe is like a family. There are strong intimate bonds between all the people so that keeps you in check. In a modern society anonymity removes all those checks. Hence norms and laws are necessary.

Just to be fair, those progressives calling to defund/disban the police are also hypocrites and fools. Today TYT is yelling about why the police didn't show up sooner. Talk about hypocrisy. If you defund the police, how are they gonna protect you from an armed MAGA coup? Police need to be well-funded and well-armed. But also well-trained. The progressive slogan to defund the police is probably the clearest example of stage Green stupidity. I understand that they mostly mean to reallocate funds to social work and the like, but a social worker is not gonna stop a crowd of MAGA idiots. That slogan -- defund the police -- is like political suicide.

If by 'a lot' you mean more than 0 then yes. There's a lot at play here. Several polarizing issues face us and when we look under the hood, it seems to no align with what is being sold as truth. I would be extremely careful if you hold a stance on anything that makes you mock someone for their views. Suicide Weekend approaches swiftly and then coming weeks will be hard on everyone. If I were me and I Am, I would not risk any of my worthless fiat in a coin that doesn't have any utility and I certainly wouldn't put it in a 'store of value' during the Greed or Delusion portion of a market cycle.

@Nyseto yeah, but suicide and depression might be too complex, because they are very conceptual activities. I certainly witnessed how dogs/cats that my family had were becoming more sad and depressed as they suffered from something (some disease or they were lonely or they were stuck at home for too long time) I'd even say there are levels of consciousness in animals too! Think of a wild dog. It is a scary and dangerous beast, can be hyper aggressive. Mainly because he is in constant survival mode, having to hunt his food, etc. But now think of a typical domesticated dog. Most of his needs if not all are taken care of: constant stream of food, warm "bed", play, has a territory that is automatically contested for him, has a company, hell, he can even get free sex and recreation without doing really that much on his own part! Such an easy life! Compare now how both dogs then behave socially, how much friendlinness they have, how much happiness they have, damn, there is even such a thing as selflessness in dogs! In those that are super devoted to you

I'll have to disagree on that one. How can animals have an egoic mind that they can identify with so they can be evil? Yes their outward manifestation of survival is brutal, but how could it come from evil? In your video about the devil you said evil is selfishness, the belief that you are a separate self. How can an animal believe it's a separate self when it's brain is so underdeveloped physically compared to a human's? Doesn't enlightenment only exist for human beings because humans are the ones with the problem of identifying with their minds whereas animals and plants are already enlightened? Have you ever seen an animal want to commit suicide? I don't know, saying an animal is evil is like saying a hurricane is evil. Someone enlighten me

I believe it. Sky-high suicide rates for trans people is a statistic that speaks for itself. This is not the argument, it is the insanity of prioritising the 1% over the 99% then expecting to win elections (yes, the right does this to, but they at least pretend that their economic theories will benefit the whole). Issues like fair living wages, opposing corrupt lobbyist groups, safe working conditions, sustainable population growth (including immigration) and clean air affect the vast majority. A proper left-wing culture would place issues like these first. Yes, the far-right is uniquely militant. No effort is made to act in good faith, as the name of the game is winning at any cost. This is partly necessary as they do represent a minority who must compensate for their numbers with sheer aggression. They do, but in the process they form a very divided culture. For example, the feminist groups would want a woman as president regardless of policies on the myriad of complex issues. (All things being equal, I'd support this, but it does defy commonsense in practice.) Such voters would not want to support any male candidate. Again, we have a situation where the left has divorced itself from being sensible and reasonable, being too at war with itself to be compelling to an average person. Those who voted for Trump in the hope of bitch-slapping the left into being sane again have a valid grievance that sadly has still not been properly recognised by the mainstream.

In a single payer system, your out of pocket expenses will decrease. Even though taxes go up, there will be no copays or deductibles so you will be saving money. Why would you want to pay extra money to billionaire health insurance CEOs for substandard health care and to corrupt pharmaceuticals that put profits over people. The pharmaceutical-engineered opioid crises was a massive violence that caused immense suffering to millions of people. And pharmaceutical companies got away with it. There is massive waste in health care right now. The U.S. has one of the most wasteful health care systems in the world. Well, actually that “waste” is our money getting funneled to corrupt health insurance / pharmaceutical CEOs and lobbyists. And who are these “lazy” people you are referring to? Poor people that are unemployed? Even if we provide the poor with healthcare and they don’t pay into it, everyone’s cost goes down. What you are saying is that you would rather pay MORE money to corrupt billionaires for an inefficient shitty healthcare system, than pay LESS money for a superior health care system if that means “lazy” people get it for free. . . This is the classic culture war that republicans and corporate democrats use to distract us from seeing corrupt plutocrats are screwing us over. And Universal Healthcare will increase the health of the entire society. It is a far superior system, you will save money, your health care will not be owned by your employer and the health of society will increase. No developed country in the world would trade their M4A system for the U.S. system. The most conservative politicians in Canada would never run against M4A, it would be political suicide. I agree that some on the left can be dogmatic have have little tolerance for dissenting views. Yet I also think what the views are is important. If I disagree with someone on the left about the best strategy on how to get M4A. For example, some on the left have been annoyingly dogmatic about forcing an M4A vote. I would probably favor this strategy, yet their are also other strategies to consider and some on the left can get locked into one strategy and get so annoying. Yet this is very different than someone trying to undercut progress toward M4A.The U.S. is decades behind other countries on health care. There are a lot of people suffering and a lot of people on the left are fed up with factually incorrect arguments from the Republicans and corporate Dems like “M4A will cost us trillions more and we can’t afford it”. I would say educating people to overcome right wing and neoliberal propaganda is important, yet sometimes it gets frustrating for the left and they get tired of the bullshit and lose their patience. A good example would be Vaush. Imo, he is doing a good job overall educating the public and persuading people, yet sometimes he gets so frustrated he has emotional tantrums and unloads on people. Yet I would agree that there are some on the left that have a lot of energy. This energy is important for progress, yet it can also lead to confrontations.

Tuesday 29/12/2020 23:56 I've got my sleep regular and early, exceptionally rare for me, and have been working out. But nothing changes. Very few people are aware of what actual futility means, and of what it means to see that you're a false self. No matter what I do, no matter what ideology or hobby I pick up, the hidden motive to make these things fill some whole or define me fails. It's painful to see how you're a false character, and it's crazy when others don't see it in themselves.They are totally immersed in the dream, no doubt or suspicion, from the womb to the grave without a hitch. There are also those who explore the depths of their egos in wonderlands of mysticism and paint the spiritual path as one of infinite accumulation. This is false, the path is one of subtraction and self dissolution. I can now consciously admit to myself that a lot of my disturbances have been due to my old self dying. And that's unfortunate because, I don't think this is a good thing, so far it seems like only another hell awaits me from leaving this hell. -- I thought that I was willing to forfeit my life (not physical suicide) for the sake of whatever must manifest. But I see that such a commitment requires entering grief and a lot of suffering. And I don't know if I can ever muster the courage and strength of will for it. There is no point to life, and that's obvious to anyone. But nonetheless, the show goes on. Many a time I try to "stand tall" to the winds of negative emotion, but the oak tree only falls over. And I can feel that the wind will knock me over, again and again, untill I'm willing to simply let go. Let go, and let the feeling grind and rub against my core being. Still need the warrior mindset, just in a different form. Time to Captain Ahab and Eren Jeager this bitch up. The jihad on your life. ?La vida sola vi vivirás ?

My younger sister (19) is currently in a relationship with a guy who is 37. I am trying to be open minded and all but I am still a bit concerned about this, especially since I am the only one who knows about their relationship because she doesn't what to tell anyone else from our family (it would be a suicide if she did, lol). As far as a guy is concerned he seems to be nice. He is an english teacher and they share lots of common interests like meditation, yoga, chakras and stuff. I haven't met him in person, but I saw his pictures and he doesn't look like a sociopath serial killer, lol. The only shady thing that I've noticed is that they met on tinder and he lied about his age in his profile and didn't confess for like a month. His excuse was that he was afraid that my sister would leave him and he didn't want that to happen since he liked her so much. P.S. it's not like my opinion would change anything because I trust my sister with the responsibility to handle her relationships herself anyway.

Coming for a check in after some days lag. 1.What where you doing before the thread was opened? Anything important? Was tending my garden and looking after the Christmas decorations 2. How did you get to where you are now? Walked 3. Do you really know if you were doing anything before opening this thread? Yea. 4. If applicable, what did you block out to focus on the check in? I had such dark thoughts about suicide. I wanted Christmas to be a happy one. So I'm going to start a daily prayer service. 5. What is now, compared to before? Maybe and hopefully positive 6. Who am I? A character in a play. 5. Is this a dream? Maybe a nightmare ----------------------------- Further questions presented by @Preety_India 8. Am I more focused now than before? Sort of. I'm trying to increase my focus by doing the following daily checks and along with this awareness checks to feel alive and active during this winter. I need to do a regular temperature check on myself from today because I've been feeling sick. Next I want to do a Daily activity and Daily alertness test.. So these checks or tests Daily Awareness check Daily Alertness check Daily Temperature test Daily Emotional Test (since I feel suicidal almost every 3rd day of the week) Daily Activity check Daily Productivity Test 9. On a scale of 1 to 10, (10 being the strongest) what is my focus level today or now? At most 3.

It depends. I agree with the stoic views on suicide. The best end to a good life is a good death. If I am ever at the point where I ACTUALLY have nobody who is dependent on me and most of my family is dead and i get something like cancer I beleive i would head down to a woods or something and just appreciate how great life has been and take myself out while I'm still in good mind. Ending life with no recolection of it and in intense pain is always another option. https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://orb.binghamton.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi%3Farticle%3D1183%26context%3Dsagp&ved=2ahUKEwjzyIeuvuftAhWIq1kKHYljB9gQFjACegQICBAB&usg=AOvVaw1hnOA9ZS8FrT9PEpC0xdeB

I think it's better to not bring more living beings to existence. Yes, logically, people should, but maybe not all people. That's my personal little opinion. Feel free to disagree. I hope I'm allowed to say this opinion. It's very politically incorrect to say it but.. it is what it is.. sorry. There are probably a few people who have a pleasant life which is worth living. The problem is that we are equipped with a integrated strong survival instinct. Which wins over pretty much anything, rationality, etc. So because of that you can get trapped in life, even if you don't want to live. It's like a prison. -------------------- "There is but one truly serious philosophical problem and that is suicide. Judging whether life is or is not worth living amounts to answering the fundamental question of philosophy. All the rest — whether or not the world has three dimensions, whether the mind has nine or twelve categories — comes afterwards. These are games; one must first answer." - Albert Camus -------------------- "If I were to be totally sincere, I would say that I do not know why I live and why I do not stop living. The answer probably lies in the irrational character of life which maintains itself without reason." "Nothing is better proof of how far humanity has regressed than the impossibility of finding a single nation, a single tribe, among whom birth still provokes mourning and lamentations." "I long to be free—desperately free. Free as the stillborn are free." "Without the faculty of forgetting, our past would weigh so heavily on our present that we should not have the strength to confront another moment, still less to live through it. Life would be bearable only to frivolous natures, those in fact who do not remember." "Better to be an animal than a man, an insect than an animal, a plant than an insect, and so on." "Salvation? Whatever diminishes the kingdom of consciousness and compromises its supremacy." - Emil M. Cioran I think in most cases there is more suffering and struggle than joy.

Ofcourse. Usually is a shit choice tho. Too controlled by illusions most of the time when such a decision is taken. But if taken in wisdom, not so much a shit choice. Only wise suicide I can think of really is either Mahasamadhi or choosing to die before without suffering of a terminal illness (Like severe Radiation Poisoning, etc.)

I was contemplating and I got an insight... The question here is: Should suicide be facilitated and organized by government? And my answer is: If we were at that level of understanding, no one would want to commit suicide in the first place. The main reason why people would hate being alive is because of the abuse that others execute all the time. Suicide is basically a reaction to the limitations that are imposed on the ability to live a decent life. It is a reaction to the retarded & corrupt capitalist system that we currently have. Abusers at the top of the capitalist system would never want to facilitate such a thing because it goes against their agendas of greed and expansion. An image of slaves 2500 years B.C. jumping off of the Egyptian pyramids comes to mind.

Hey @PhilGR, If we are not talking about the 'good' and 'bad' aspects of it, and just are talking about their right to take away their lives - what do you have to say about these two examples - are both these situations the same? 1) A 17 year old jumping off the building after a heartbreak 2) A suicide bomber in a mall. They both wish to commit the same act - but should both have the same right? If you tell that the suicide bomber shouldn't be given the right because he will end up killing other people - you have already taken a moral position, and there is a presupposition of certain ethical standards - and hence, it becomes relative.

ofc not, all suicide committers should be thrown in jail, CRIMINAL SCUM

To assume that anyone is in the position to decide whether we are allowed to commit suicide or not is exactly the same as assuming to be in a position of deciding over someone else's life/death altogether. Are you allowed to live? Well, nobody is in the position to decide that for someone else, at least according to our common sense and law.* Are you allowed to die? Do you see how this is basically the same question? *I live in Europe; death penalty is not allowed, so my reasoning might vary to the laws of your particular country.

Unlike you LMFAO You didn't answer my question about free samples, why is that? Let's try again Have you ever seen free samples? How is giving away food supposed to make companies money? I guess we'd find out or Jeff and Amazon would take the let's say 10 million dollar loss, would likely be suicide inducing and devastating, but it is what it is. 10 million for 100billionaire is a lot or something, 10 million for a trillion dollar company is a ton or sumfin.