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This is a duality in language only, which you are pointing out. You could say "non" or "not" anything you like, like non-nothingness, it is fiction. Most dualities come out of language use. Illusion is only recognised retrospectively. So before illusion is recognised for what it is, it is real. But consciousness is self-referential, so it has the ability to recognise stuff - an observer isn't necessary. To itself, i.e. it wasn't an illusion before it was recognised to be one. Maybe I see the shadow of a man in a dark alley at night (real), and then I realise it was just a cat walking along a wall throwing a shadow (illusion). Yeah moment is the wrong word, because it has a connotation of "snapshot" or "slice" in time. It's no such thing, moments are a fiction of language. But I was talking within a paradigm of "moments". For something to stop existing, a comparison has to be made between two things: existence and non-existence. For a comparison to be made, we need to remember the state of something before it changed. So we are reliant on memory (possibly a fiction) to say that "moments" go into oblivion. That presupposes that "moments" exist, which they don't, but we can discuss things as if they do exist. The appearance of movement, space and time are all real, they are the content of experience, the illusory nature of them is only recognised after you have experienced them. They are real and unreal. Agreed, both are the case simultaneously. There is a static (persistent) quality to experience as well as a fluid one. There is a subtle interplay of the two: energy (movement) is conserved (static).

All difference is imaginary. Oneness/Existence/Consciousness/Love/God (/w/e label you find fitting for the fundamental nature of reality) is the Truth: i.e. it is everything. Everything is it. It's this, this eternal moment wherein everything appears and out of which everything appears. Pure magic. Pure mystery, yet as obvious as the blue sky. All difference within Oneness/Existence/You (with capital Y, not your identity) is a game, a play. Imaginary. It isn't real in any absolute sense. So in that way, the difference you imagine there is between 'existence' and 'non-existence' isn't real: it's imaginary. Non-existence/nothingness IS THIS; it's identical with what you call existence or being. Being is non-being. Non-being is being. Speaking in purely philosophical, logical terms, of course non-existence (death, deep sleep) and existence (life, consciousness) are polar opposites. But the only one that's interested in logic to rubricize Oneness into categories is the ego that wants to survive. It's a game. And you are not part of the game or outside the game. You are IT. The only thing that can die is that separate self which thinks it were born and which thinks it's real. That's just God playing a game with Itself; a game which, often, "seems" very, very, very serious and full of horror: only so You can then, eventually, *actually grasp* how freakingly amazing You in Truth are and how freakingly non-serious, loving and infinite and good You/Existence actually is. >>Contrast<<<. Imagined. Play. Existence is inherently playful. All purposes are imaginary, i.e.: play. It's an infinite strange loop, where you can lose and find 'yourself' (as 'something') for eternity.

I personally like non-existence because I find consciousness to be nothing, and I think that's the source. I understand that when all distinctions break down nothing and something are one and the same. Existence always exists, but I think non-existence (total void nothingness) is packaged with it... The void acts as awareness, when there is something to be aware of. Which there always is. What does one call an existent nothingness? It's such a contradiction.

I haven't visited here much, but Leo was talking about something about crossing and taking everyone with him (which I already knew because when I was more active on here he talked about that) So I feel like sharing my experience on 6 grams of woodlovers called Psilocybe subaeruginosa, in Australia these are known as very dark versions of golden teachers. I'm especially sensitive to psychedelics (suprisingly hahaha, I use to think the opposite) so a dose tends to be 1.5-2x stronger. I am curious if @Leo Gura is talking about this experience, and if he isn't then WTF is he talking about. I'd be curious to know where this experience sits on the cone. I don't know how you go deeper then this, but if you can great. So heres my trip: So I had 2-3 trips of these subs beforehand, if you take psyches properly, they get more intense the more you take them, thats because they start getting really serious with you. So this was my 3rd or 4th trip with them and I took 6 grams dried. This experience happened after having "permanent" sober awakenings like no self realization and all the other stuff. So its beyond just being in a state of oneness. So I took the subs at 9am (I picked them from the ground so was a bit worried about eating posionous ones, but thats part of the fun, if you aren't willing to permanently physically die for truth then it aint for you IMO, sorry, will have that stance till the day i really do die hahahaha), and felt really shit as you do on big doses of mushrooms, felt like i was about to physically die and go to the hospital because ive just eaten some poisonous ones, felt horrible for letting my family down because they told me psyches were bad and they were right in the end, blabalbalbalba I had visions of being in the hospital for a period of time that felt like years but it would of been only 20 minutes, my flatmate looked worried and she monitored me for nausea symptoms, then left and went to the shops. I saw machine elves but they dissolved pretty quickly. Unexplainable hell endured, I went through every possible fear I could imagine. Everything from going to jail from taking this shit to never falling in love to regretting things, to letting my family down, contemplated the possibility of being "stuck" in an eternal hell of nothingness devoid of love forever, even contemplated the possibility that love was made up, which is possible on these high doses even if love is the greatest truth of all, its possible to enter those states its absolutely amazing. Then I checked the time and it was 3pm and I was like yes its nearly over. I stayed in my room because I have anxiety of talking to people on trips because i secretly feel bad for taking them, like I'm willing to physically die for the truth, but my family and everyone in hell, and that feels a bit shitty to me, but i have to do it anyway so i try and keep away from people while tripping, also dont wanna get locked up. Then I was like, wait what was i even going through, I totally forgot, wait what even is a poisonous mushroom, totally couldnt comprehend it, was so confused. Then I was like what in the actual fuck is "death", what the fuck was i worried about, I can't even remember. What day is it today? Checked the day and it was "suuuundayyy" what in the fuck is that. then i checked the time and it was 10am, and I was like, wait did I make that entire trip up in my head and it never happened. So then I waited for my flatmate to come home, but she didn't. So I mustered up the courage to walk outside my room, and she wasn't there (she's my ex, and we have a deep platonic connection) and not only that, but all of her photos on the wall were gone. I went wait this is really weird, she's not hanging on the wall, I looked at my phone and she was there in what'sapp but I totally forgot who she was. And I had this sense that I completely made her up. I thought about my mum, and I thought wait did I make her completely up too. I looked around the room, it was 10am (I had memories of it being 3pm and coming out of the trip)... and it was 10am and stuck at 10am. I was walking around my apartment, looking at everything, and the 10am didn't change. And not only that, but I totally became conscious that the entire past didn't happen, and that I didn't actually take any mushrooms. (No joke i really didn't), and I thought, wait if i didn't take any mushrooms, of fuck no that means im high forever, I've got this massive body load and im in this state forever. I had this sense that I was in my room, walking out of my room on repeat. As soon as I walked out of my room, I opened my eyes and i was in my room again, and walked out of it again. And every time, the mushrooms were telling me, there's nothing to fear, no one exists. I tried making the 10am clock go forward, and everytime i tried i just couldn't do it. And I remember thing, omg i can't move it forward because ive completely forgotten death, and i know something which prevents me from moving the clock forward and for my flatmate to be real. Oh no what have i done ive just broken consciousness. But then it got worse, because its not that i broke consciousness, its that consciousness was always like this, and my entire life, literally all of it, was constructed by me walking into my room and getting lost in a thought story... fucken hell all of my family, friends, spiritual path, infinite love enlightenment, jeeeeeeeeze that was all a thought story that i got lost in(for a few minutes hahaha). I went please no, please not this can't be real, i miss my life, i miss my friends, i miss my journey. And there was no controller so even if i tried i couldn't because consciousness was completely in control. I oscillated in an eternal loop between trying to manifest all of my friends and especially my flatmate, then realizing i couldn't because i wasn't in control and I knew that there's no death. So i tried, realized i couldn't, tried again, realized i couldn't, on and on and on. Then i realized (and this fucken hurt) that all my goals were impossible to achieve, because i couldn't understand any of my goals. Its impossible to understand your goals, because "singularity" and that you just pretend to understand your goals because thats the only way to make duality happen. I realized that i couldn't pinpoint what exactly I liked about sex, its just movements, but what is it about those movements that I like, I couldn't figure it out. Then i had to realize that there's nothing in sex, at all. That fucken hurt. And same with enlightenment and everything else. Then finally i accepted it, "alright, I'm god, that entire life was simply a few minutes of me in my room getting lost in a thought story, and none of it is real, ok i gotta man up, take responsibility for my consciousness and make something of this" So I got rice from my fridge, and threw it all over the floor. Next i put a massive dent in my wall, not like anyone's gonna notice, because all there is, is me. Next i went onto my balcony, and looked at the world like it was inception(the movie) my hair was blowing in the wind like leonardo dicaprio, I clinged onto the balcony fence hard like a monkey and wondered "what would happen if I jumped off, should I try? This is afterall my world, I can do whatever the fuck i want, and no one is around to stop me" I got the rest of my subs chewed em, and spat them all over the fence of my balcony. Chuckling to myself "hahahah what an illusion, that these things make you high, im high all the time and those subs(mushrooms) do nothing" Then last minute "nah wont jump off the balcony, that's boring" I felt suffering for not having a flatmate and for realizing my crush was imaginary. I saw how she was empty, hollow, literally like a rock. She was still, not there, her personality wasn't there, made it entirely up. I EVEN MADE UP THAT IM STRUGGLING WITH WOMEN, OH ITS WORSE THEN STRUGGLING, THEY ARENT EVEN FUCKEN THERE. HOW CAN I GET BETTER WITH WOMEN IF THEY ARENT EVEN THERE, FUCK THE STRUGGLING IS DISTRACTING ME FROM THE FACT THAT ILL NEVER ACHIEVE GETTING A WOMEN BECAUSE SHE AINT THERE. FUCK. As god, you gotta man up and take responsibility for it, who else will do it hahahahaahhahahahahahhaha. I messaged her and admitted that i liked her, because she aint real anyway. So I thought, well as im god i have to create a crush, so i went to my phone, and looked at her profile and all of her messages, as a way of my creating her. Then I checked all of my flatmate's messages, as a way of recreating her. And I wondered to myself, how the fuck am i ever gonna come back from this, i know too much hahahahaahahahahahahahahahahha (very crazy madness laugh wahahahahahahahahahahheheheehehhohohohohoho) yeah of course, its impossible to come back from this stupid. And then it dawned on me, its time to live a life where i know that im god and everything is made up. Enough thought stories in my room, dreaming up all that crap, time to just live knowing that they are completely hollow and made by me. I even thought about my gay friend, and I literally took on his voice and acted like him, embodied him, because i made him up so i could, he's asian, and i looked in the mirror, and i was acting exactly like an asian gay dude OF COURSE IM GOD I CAN DO THAT. So as i was recreating everything (while stepping in all the brown rice on the ground) i tried to put my hand through the wall, and i couldn't, i thought why the fuck can't i, this is stupid im god i can do anything. Then i started contemplating, well wait what if my belief of what god is, is wrong. Then i got this grand sense of a super computer, and that consciousness was a super computer. Then this super computer started creating my flatmate's aura, my crush's aura. Then it started creating the aura or subtle body of my body, and i was just going woooooow wooooooow woooooow wooooow I was there watching it create the auras/subtle bodies of everything, just watching it in shock, time was moving forward because of this aura I was there going wooow wooow wooow sitting on the couch and as i was doing that my flatmate walked in and went "WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED HERE!!!! YOU PUT A HOLE IN THE WALL, OMG YOU RIPPED UP MY BOOK, OMG" and i was like, wait, but you're imaginary, you don't exist she still screaming " I CANT BELIEVE YOU DID THIS" in my head im thinking "mushrooms, this aint fair, i cant believe you did this to me" But the bigger question i was thinking, how the actual fuck did i come back from an experience like that. That blew my mind. And nothing was the same after that trip, it was a humongous awakening, far bigger then whatever you've read about. The interesting thing is, I have so much balls, that I decided to try that stunt again, in a months time, this time with 3-4 grams of subs, but lemon teked. And let me tell you, I went to the same solopsis place of omg im all alone and my life is just my in my room doing a thought story, but i remembered, this happened before, it'll happen again, you'll come back, and lo and behold, here i am typing. What happened in that second trip was a trillion times deeper then what you've read above. It makes what ive written above seem like 5 seconds of meditation I can't explain all of it, but some bits of it were: 1. I started actually having delirium level hallucinations, like datura. I saw my parents come into my apartment, and after the trip they actually didnt, it was impossible to tell that it was a hallucination. Like datura. It happened in several occasions including i was watching a yoga video to ground myself, and another teacher came in and interrupted the lesson, after the trip i replayed the video and none of that happened. 2. I saw myself from a 3rd person perspective, and was controlling my body from a 3rd person perspective. I was literally stuck in time again, this this time it was a lot harder to make the clock move forward. Had to do a lot of stunts to get there, the mushrooms really challenged me. I had to watch myself walk backwards to make the time rewind backwards so that i could make it go forward again. 3. half of my phone chopped off as i was looking at the time, like a video game having rendering issues, half the phone was gone and i saw all the components inside it, after the trip there was no cracks to my phone. 4. I got stuck in an alternative universe for a while, when the trip ended the first time, my dad was dead, and died ages ago, that freaked me the fuck out, somehow i got back to this universe where my dad wasn't dead. and much much more.... after that trip i realized that consciousness goes deeper and deeper and there's no end. So Leo, this isn't the pinnacle? This isn't beyond the pinnacle?

I think he basically was thinking along the lines of "just because you didn't perceive any more than what you did, how do you know there isn't anything more?" Like how a blind person could know everything except color. The infinite nature of total void nothingness is indisputable since any limitation or boundary is no longer nothingness. If there is only nothing and the apparition of something what else could there be but the unity of those two? It's both nothingness and literal everythingness. How could anything be outside that? When he asked you to use the term all-encompassing I think he understood the idea at that point, but the word infinity was tripping him up.

Of course. God loves your bias for sushi, which is why you love sushi but hate dog turd, and God will not force you to love dog turd. That's God's love for you. God's love is so great it allows you to hate. God will even allow you to murder someone you hate. Everything IS pure Nothingness. Your question assumes a difference between form and formlessness. That was his bais. There is of course no reason to end suffering other than that you don't like it.

You are speaking as if unconditional love is something that exists outside of you. It is inside of you. Your bias for sushi creates a split in the unconditional love that makes it conditional. You make unconditional love, conditional. Find out how you do it... Imagine God as a Complete Nothingness. It is so Complete Nothingness that has nothing to compare itself against. It has no language, no concepts, no material, not anything. The question is, how does Complete Nothingness become aware of what it is? Through your Being. God has to exist as something, in order to avoid Complete Nothingness. In other words, God knows himself through you. You tell God what he IS. What you need to experience is this Complete Nothingness. If you don't experience it and don't know it at the level of Being, it is just a philosophy. Because he was born as a mortal, and mortals have preferences. In fact, if mortals had no preferences they would have nothing to do. Imagine you being born in a perfect world and get everything just by wishing it into existence. In a billion years, wouldn't you wish to experience some suffering again?

It's no more than you ego facing his dissolution. keep in mind that the ego is no joke, it is very powerful. I had that experience, it's terror. the infinite nothingness swallows you and annihilates you, and there is no god of love, only death at an unimaginable level. It is your ego that you do not want to let go. that very experience is god without your ego screaming. I had to do it many more times and meditate many hours daily for almost a year until I was able to let go. a real job. I'd say you have to or you can get sick. It is what I felt, it was not an option, it was necessary. the result is liberation

@LastThursday lmao thanks for reminding me of my profile-picture! @Scholar I probably need to observe the mind how it makes sense of reality NOW, because what the mind does is it remembers glimpses, nothingness etc. So it creates a new worldview integrating that glimpse that is not present now, but the respresentation of truth I witnessed in the path is only a Representation of it now, so it can't be TRUE in the now. One more pointer please, I like where this is going.

Great talk man. I'm not really certain "consciousness" is the best term because of the way most people think of the term. I think I tend to prefer terms like void or infinity. 99% of people see consciousness as being a "thing". Like there's actually some "thing" back there seeing everything, rather than realizing that when they look for consciousness they find there is literally nothing behind there, you are it, and it's nothing at all. It is much easier for example to explain form and formless (or nothing and something). Nothingness could never have any boundary or limit. It is outright impossible and easy to explain. So that term is one I greatly enjoy.

The phrase is impossible. You can't be more nothing than nothing. What we experience as consciousness is literally nothingness. Maybe more objects can group together and appear in that nothingness (you and your mind being one of these objects), but of course the nothingness never ever and could never change. It is exactly like people say, trying to see your eyeballs with your eyeballs. No matter how far you retreat you can never find anything back there. There is NOTHING there. When I see Vedantists say "Brahman has no properties" etc and that it can't be captured in any word, I am sure they mean the same thing as Buddhists, despite commonly using the consciousness moniker...

Man... Nothingness is so rad. It shouldn't exist and yet when you try to find consciousness you find that there is genuinely and literally nothing there at all. Yet we are it so could it be said to not exist in the truest sense? So fucking wild and freaky. I love it.

I would say yes. imagine there is a big bang and something emerges out of nothingness. the idea of "things", protons, elementary particles, forces, physical laws. all this to form a rock. an entity of enormous complexity. the universe is that rock, half a meter, let's say. a divine rock. manifested existence. so yes, it has a pov

First of all, I just want to say that I am blown away by the accuracy of this video. This experience is so incredibly beyond words I am shocked Leo is able to communicate it so clearly. Until about 25-30 minutes in, I related to everything that was said in the video– I mean exactly. But I have some questions about the point where he talked about realizing God inward. So, he talked about how he realized God externally (this is what I related to so much) and then he talked about turning inward and realizing God inwardly. Well, I realized God externally (in the exact way he described) but at a different point in time when I turned inward, I didn't realize God I realized no self, nothingness, and infinity all in one swoop. And because I realized these together, it's like I went from ego-death to no self to self as infinity/nothingness in like a nanosecond. But I knew this wasn't realizing myself as god because although I felt these things as me I still had this lingering feeling of how I didn't know how it was me. Then later I realized myself as Awareness and how awareness is the only thing that could possibly exist. And because awareness is aware, it could never not be aware or 'die'. I still feel like this isn't realizing God. And so I think I am confused on what 'God' even means. Because when I look at reality externally I clearly see God. But if I turned inward, it's like all of a sudden I have a different interpretation of God that is the 'man in the sky' and I cannot identify with that so there's like this block of realizing God inwardly or something. But it's weird because I don't think of God like that when I am looking at it externally I just see God as Reality. I also have realized oneness, life as a dream, and how you are the Creator of this dream (maybe this is my version of God?). One day, I just woke up with extreme clarity on how everything external was one and a reflection of what is internal. And how what is internal (for me it feels like nothingness/infinity) is so elusive and undefined that it is reflected back to itself as 'something' to represent itself in whatever way. In other words, 'something' is reflected from nothing in order to understand or show what nothing is or could be. But it's all happening simultaneously so it's all really just imagination. Idk I guess this is all besides the point. What I am really wondering is if realizing yourself as infinity is the same thing as realizing you are God? What was said on Realizing Scale What Leo describes as realizing Scale (when he talks about the hair follicles on his arm) I have not realized this at all. I have realized– though– No Space. I don't know if that is even a thing but when I realized God externally I realized that there is no such thing as space. It's like when I go on a walk, I have this whole new worldview that I don't actually get closer to anything as I 'move' towards it. But just that those things get bigger or smaller in appearance. It's definitely psychedelic-like I think although I've never had a psychedelic experience. It's like I say to myself, "Are you really getting closer to that tree? Or is the tree's imagery just getting bigger?" That's how I feel now when I go on my walks. haha. It's like I'm walking around as an avatar in a video game. Not all of the time but only when I choose to focus on it without trying too hard. It's like there's no space or even atmosphere. It's all just sucked out of the 'bubble' of oneness so to speak.

I believe that God is nothing and knows nothing, and suddenly it is a lot of energy that explodes and it is only that, and it only knows that, and that energy forms protons and God is protons, no more, know how to be a proton, and he is playing with the possibilities until reach a complexity as unimaginable as the human brain, a pattern within a pattern within a pattern ... all shapes in nothingness, and those unimaginable patterns intertwine in unimaginable numbers creating all this perfect and glorious dream that leads to .... maybe God doesn't know. Only divine improvisation

@Emerald And yet, here are all your beliefs of what masculine/feminine is. You are not becoming aware of an absolute truth, you are becoming more accepting of the variables in life that you have perceived and attempting to find balance/comfortability in said variables. Reality itself is a shared egoic construct that we agree on. But, many of us here have realized the true illusion that is our reality and the Nothingness that is Actuality. But, very few people on this planet actually have become aware of this. If reality itself is that of an illusion, so is the idea of masculine/feminine and the more we embrace these ideas the more we delude ourselves from our true nature. Once I gained the insight of the masculine/feminine I was able to integrate them as well, but the insights didn't stop there. If was to guess, the ego whishes to formulate understanding of these ideas in order to gain a self of control over self and other. The more control the ego has, the better if feels about itself. The grander the identity we have, the grander the ego has done it's job. The ego does not want to release it's identity and will justify it's existence in any way possible. Most people could never accept this is a "dream" for a lack of better words or we are all One. Just like most people can't accept the masculine/feminine are constructs of fabrication within reality itself and not an Absolute truth. It's not about rejection of said polarity, it's about accepting the unknowingness of what we are attempting to tether to. The more we think we know, the less we actually know. The mind does not like this idea at all. Again, there is nothing wrong with this. There are perceived benefits to living within the illusion. I'm only giving a differing take on this, because it's almost everyday we see these topics being talked about. It really seems like no one is getting anywhere except the personal satisfaction of stating their own opinion onto another. Though, I may preach a non-dual way of living with these ideas. It's difficult for me to fully embrace that. Largely, I don't see masculine/feminine anymore within the confines of reality itself. Though, on a overarching scale of how reality is formed I have some beliefs of how these energies manifest reality itself. Though there is an attempt to drop these notions as well for I feel they are still part of self-deception. I'll explain them below: Masculine is the dreamer that dreams the dream, or the mind behind what is formed. Feminine is form itself or anything that our awareness can highlight. (Physical form, emotions, thought, and ect) The masculine watches/observes the form(feminine) in order to evolve said form. The feminine attracts the masculine to be observed, much like a bee to a flower. This creates the illusion we live in. This process repeats instantly for eternality at once. Forever "creating"/evolving reality on itself. Fear is what drives the masculine to be attracted to the feminine. Though this fear isn't human fear, but an attempt to complete itself by merging with the feminine. Absolute Love is the totality of both energies unified. This idea has nothing to do with men or women for our vessels are not defined by masculine/feminine for both male/female would be considered the observed form therefore inherently feminine. But, a product(dream) of the masculine therefore inherently masculine. Though, one could remove all of those above ideas for there truly is Nothing behind them.

Everything can be known including the Truth that nothing ever happened. This doesn't mean "nothing is happening" lol. Don't get deluded by "this life is an illusion, nothing matters". Life is the realest thing there is. Your body and mind is real, your feelings are real, your thoughts are real, everything that has ever happened to you is real. It may seem like I'm contradicting myself and I totally get it, it's the trickiest riddle for the mind to "understand" because the ultimate Truth of Nothingness is beyond understanding, it can only be experienced.

@Leo Gura yeah, I'm saying that as a figure of speech. It means the pursuit of enlightenment is a means to an end. How can the ego not use it for its own selfish purposes? I mean sure you can argue one is in search for the Truth. For what? For it's only selfish purposes. Once you discover the Truth/nothingness/infinity/no-self/Love then what? If you were truly selfless we couldn't be here to discuss it. All the consciousness in the universe then back to your self. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing more pleasurable than infinite consciousness and awakening. And in saying that, I will continue to dissolve the self for years to come. My point remains, love is the only answer. Loving unconditionally. Not because it's a saintly, moral fantasy but because I am everyone and everything. If you feel I'm still missing something, please let me know. Maybe I'm wrong. I know nothing but what I've gathered from my own experience of awakening.

Well the individual attempting to be free is an illusion. Freedom is the unconditional love for everything exactly the way it is which includes the judgments, the happiness, the fear, the confusion, the anger, the bliss..... Freedom is that free completely all inclusive. No it is not an illusion, if there is individual, trying to be free is real for him/her. Therefore, when individual loves everything there will be no more judgments, happiness, fear, confusion for the individual there will be only love there for him/her, which is the way to nothingness. Of course you can say you are already nothing. Yes it is true. However, as you mentioned above that if your house is burned or your sister is get raped, this is not even close to be nothing. These shows that your thought process is still so active. Because, you maybe never see the house burns or anyone getting raped. Just because of you learned and thought of it, therefore you suffer. So illusion is still is real for you and being free is real for you. Just an advice, Dont get me wrong but contemplate brother and meditate. This is stuff can not be learned by reading, you have to walk the path. Peace ☮️ much love !

How can there be something from nothing? The ULTIMATE TRUTH is NOTHING EVER HAPPENED. The Terrifying TRUTH of Nothingness. Enjoy!

reality is nothingness, in the sense that there is not real content. So right now it's nothingness but it seems to the mind that there is content, many things, ideas, memories, images. they are false. It is not that they are a lie, it is that it seems that they are happening but they are empty images that do not mean anything. a steak is the same as a beggar, or humanity, or philosophy. nothing, empty. but we are addicted to that false content, so if in a moment they take it away, what remains, what we call emptiness, seems lacking in something, absence. It is not like that, emptiness is empty because it has no content, but it is full, it is being. it's pretty straightforward once you see it. The important thing imo is to recognize the adiction to the content, and see it's unreality. After the void is starting to be less threatening

Well, I don't think it would be conscious alone, because it was like I could only know it through the objects which weren't it. Alone it would be nothing at all. So that is why it is confusing imagine how it works. The self-mind evaporates, the nothing is still there. But I won't know it... Yet it is what I am. So I will. But I won't... The only way I got it was when someone used an analogy where nothing is light and minds are prisms diffusing the light out. You can't go back in your fractured form. I get it that way. But I am not sure what it is experientially like. I understand there is no "my" consciousness in the true sense, rather I belong to it. But experientially from a first person perspective what continues (or second person?). This is where it gets hard to think... It is easy to understand consciousness (the nothingness) is everything that exists, but you see relatively in this form we don't know each other's experience. I get that the same nothing does know both of our experience. It's just weird because it's like, it's me but not me at the same time.

Yeah, the Nothingness cannot be known. You can only BE it. Because knowing is dualistic but Nothingness is nondual.

Sorry to hear you're feeling rough again I hope it gets better soon. Trying give you a glimmer of hope. The very fact that it feels like a struggle and a fight means there's a part of you which is resisting the loneliness and sadness, which believes there is an alternative. Then there's this other voice which insists there is no reward. So you're conflicted, split and fighting yourself between hope and hopeless. Please please don't give up on the hope. "and when you die, then what? You'll lose it all anyway." I've already lost my childhood, my youth, my parents, many friendships, etc loads of good things. But I've never lost the present moment. If we can find contentment in the here and now we can carry that with us even through death, if there is an after life. If not, then there won't be any awareness of loss anyway. Pure nothingness, pure everythingness.

Are you same James that was here, who was into nothingness? if so what happnd to that account?