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Question: When does the inner transformation take place when you're self-actualizing? I'm asking this because I suddenly felt something strange happening to me. I'm feeling much more comfortable with enlightenment than ever before. For example, I no longer care about other people's opinions of me, I'm no longer vindictive and I don't feel the need to get even with anyone. I'm also exploiting other "unenlightened" people to constantly remind myself of not falling into the same traps as them, and really turns those I used to hate into a learning experience. There's still many more challenges down the road, like conquering my fear of the unknown and uncertain, but I know I'll eventually conquer my fears. I've been wondering, why does this transformation feel very sudden? Is it because I haven't been paying attention to myself? If I'm not paying attention to my own growth then how can I grow in the first place? Sorry if I'm asking too many questions here. I just needed to get my thoughts straight.

@cetus56 I myself have no idea if it is kundalini or not. but here are some honest observations: 1) I woke up at 5:30 am today and now its 11:10 am in Bangladesh. In between this 6 hours, I felt this energy at least 10 times. While morning walk, it hit me 3-4 time consecutively. 2) This is NOT directly related to my sex drive. My penis is not erected while these energy bursts. It feels like an electric shock lasting 1-2 seconds. There maybe some subtle sensations spreading through the body after every hit. 3) I've been feeling them as far as I can remember. Maybe more than 10 years. But never really paid any attention to them. I talked with my friends about it. They said I'm just excited/horny. But my experience tells otherwise. I feel this current when I'm relaxed, conscious/mindful or get intimate with 'that' which is alive and feel it without putting any label on it. 4) I've been very confused and frustrated especially for the last 4-5 years. During this time, I made the biggest mistake which is escaping and suppressing all the uncomfortable facts and feelings of my life with bunch of addictions. I used to desensitize myself for days (lets say upto a week) with food, entertainment, porn etc the list goes on. During these unconscious but exciting periods I never got the energy hits. Not even once a day. But once I recommitted to start a clean life from scratch, the energy hits would start again. And finally if you wanna learn and apply the genuine path of kundalini I recommend the book "Kundalini Tantra" by Satyananda Saraswati. This book contains all sorts of information and their implications. Lots of Kundalini yoga starting from cleansing and strengthening all the chakras and nadis of the body. A very well written guide from a legitimate master who observed tons of lay students in ashrams over decades. The author claims that full kundalini awakening awakens the human brain to its completion. A brain having 10 parts each chakra, nadi and the type of awakening opens up certain part of the brain. He claims that full kundalini awakening changes the dna structures, the scent, skin etc of the body. A transformation literally made from inside out. He says kundalini awakening is the evolution of consciousness through human body and taking kundalini to the perfect state is basically the ultimate life purpose of coming into existence with a human body.

Please allow me to play the devil's advocate here: Is it not possible that the experiences you are describing are just hallucinatory states, and you just experience the projections of your own inner content (however fantastic they might appear) ? Whenever Buddha was asked about Enlightenment or Nirvana, silence would be his reply (if I'm not mistaken). This is quite significant. Also the saying: those that know, do not speak, and those that speak, they do not know. Of course, beyond arguments and counter-arguments, the real test of fire will be if those experiences produce real and permanent transformations in your life. My intuition still says these shortcut paths to enlightenment will not end up well. (I really hope I'm mistaken) People stay years stuck in meditative practises because they lack complete knowledge of what is required for permanent transformation. An interesting hint is given by Sadhguru in this video:

@Preetom sounds like kundalini indeed. Dont be mistaken active kundalini doesnt mean instant enlightenment. What kundalini does is that it deconstructs one's stuck nervous system, that creates an egoic perception of reality. This can take years (and will). Treat it with respect and love, be kind to yourself, I recommend Matt Kahn, all of his stuff is brilliant for a person with awakened kundalini. Some breathwork is useful at times, but only at certain phases. You must go with what resonates. Be ready to take a bunch of naps, go on eating streaks and insomnia. All of your cellular memory that stores trauma will surface eventually. This is no joke, it is hell! It is the dark night of the soul. And I cannot emohasize this more. Be kind to yourself my dearest friend. I wish you courage on your journey of transformation. And know that any kind of discomfort is only here to remind you how strong you are, by showing you what youre capable of surviving. Feel free to educate yourself on kundalini, beware of a lot of nonsense. Apply only relevant stuff that works well with your direct experience. Much love, and welcome on your journey home :). May you be blessed with good fortune.

@Elton wow, sounds like you got a nice couple of insights there. that's how we have to see trauma events; as an opportunity to learn something (--> change something in our lives) yes, the ego cares about its survival, that gets really clear once it gets threatened. it then come right back full force. it gets very present. letting go is difficult, I think it's a longterm process. baby steps every day and with time the transformation will be huge.

@Ryan_047 No money for therapy? I had a similar lack of access to therapy when I was depressed. Check out 7 Cups of Tea. A site with free volunteer listeners. They're trained by the 7 cups site with courses on different problems such as — relationship problems, social anxiety, depression, etc. They are not as good as actual therapists — but many of them have went through similar problems with their mental health themselves and many have good advice on dealing with that. They're also very warm — I distrusted everybody when I was depressed. I had this belief if everyone knew the real me — they'd abandon me. Think of me as weak. I was constantly fearing what they would think of me. But I was able to trust them. There are free sites online with different instructions for treatments. I've tried muscle progression relaxation, hypnosis, cognitive behavioral therapy exercises, mindfulness and meditation, physical exercise (research say they boost mood), going outside in nature more (research also says this boosts mood), gratitude exercises, awe walks, research on positive psychology, Enneagram (A study of the types of fears, anger and shame we have in life and how to deal with them in a healthy manner. ), VIA Strengths test (Knowing and using strengths in daily life boost confidence and sense of control) or happiness psychology on free sites like Coursera and so on. Its best done with a therapist sure — but the internet is full of vast information to help you. Even if you have a therapist — you often only meet him or her once a week. Most of the time spent through the days is done without one and you'd have to learn how to survive without one. There are many experienced practioners like actual therapists and psychologists who give out their advice online — so there's still room for help even without paying for one. I recommend you this site to start with. Good luck. https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/ Also VIA Strengths seem especially useful for confidence. https://www.viacharacter.org/www/ Enneagram also seems very useful for dealing with the trauma @Mad Max mentions. Here are the descriptions of the types. https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/ As well as a free email subscription with short reflections, lessons and practices for everyday for enneagram. https://subscriptions.enneagraminstitute.com/subscribers/create Scott Jeffrey's article series on Alchemical Transformation seems useful for treatment. His Shadow Work article is the best one I've found. https://scottjeffrey.com/guides/

@Marinus With man, the natural, automatic process of evolution ends. Man is the last product of unconscious evolution. With man, conscious evolution begins. Many things are to be taken into account. First, unconscious evolution is mechanical and natural. It happens by itself. Through this type of evolution, consciousness evolves. But the moment consciousness comes into being, unconscious evolution stops because its purpose has been fulfilled. Unconscious evolution is needed only up to the point where the conscious comes into being. Man has become conscious. In a way, he has transcended nature. Now nature cannot do anything; the last product that was possible through natural evolution has come into being. Now man becomes free to decide whether to evolve or not to evolve. Secondly, unconscious evolution is collective, but the moment evolution becomes conscious it becomes individual. No collective, automatic evolution proceeds further than mankind. From now on, evolution becomes an individual process. Consciousness creates individuality. Before consciousness evolves, there is no individuality. Only species exist, not individuality. When evolution is still unconscious, it is an automatic process; there is no uncertainty about it. Things happen through the law of cause and effect. Existence is mechanical and certain. But with man, with consciousness, uncertainty comes into existence. Now, nothing is certain. Evolution may take place or it may not. The potential is there, but the choice will rest entirely with each individual. That is why anxiety is a human phenomenon. Below man there is no anxiety because there is no choice. Everything happens as it must. There is no choice so there is no chooser, and in the absence of the chooser, anxiety is impossible. Who is to be anxious? Who is to be tense? With the possibility of choice, anxiety follows like a shadow. Everything has to be chosen now; everything is a conscious effort. You alone are responsible. If you fail, you fail. It is your responsibility. If you succeed, you succeed. It is again your responsibility. And every choice is ultimate in a sense. You cannot undo it, you cannot forget it, you cannot go back on it. Your choice becomes your destiny. It will remain with you and be a part of you; you cannot deny it. But your choice is always a gamble. Every choice is made in darkness because nothing is certain. That is why man suffers from anxiety. He is anxious to his very roots. What torments him, to begin with, is: to be or not to be? to do or not to do? to do this or to do that? “No choice” is not possible. If you do not choose, then you are choosing not to choose; it is a choice. So you are forced to choose; you are not free not to choose. Not choosing will have as much effect as any other choice. The dignity, the beauty and the glory of man is this consciousness. But it is a burden also. The glory and the burden come simultaneously the minute you become conscious. Every step is a movement between the two. With man, choice and conscious individuality come into existence. You can evolve, but your evolution will be an individual endeavor. You may evolve to become a buddha or you may not. The choice is yours. So there are two types of evolution: collective evolution and individual, conscious evolution. `Evolution’ implies unconscious, collective progress, so it would be better to use the word `revolution’ in talking about man. With man, revolution becomes possible. Revolution, as I am using the word here, means a conscious, individual effort toward evolution. It is bringing individual responsibility to a peak. Only you are responsible for your own evolution. Ordinarily, man tries to escape from his responsibility for his own evolution, from the responsibility of freedom of choice. There is a great fear of freedom. When you are a slave the responsibility for your life is never yours; someone else is responsible. So in a way, slavery is a very comfortable thing. There is no burden. In this respect, slavery is a freedom: freedom from conscious choice. The moment you become completely free, you have to make your own choices. No one forces you to do anything; all alternatives are open to you. Then the struggle with the mind begins. So one becomes afraid of freedom. Part of the appeal of ideologies such as communism and fascism is that they provide an escape from individual freedom and a shirking of individual responsibility. The burden of responsibility is taken away from the individual; the society becomes responsible. When something goes wrong, you can always point to the state, the organization. Man becomes just a part of the collective structure. But in denying individual freedom, fascism and communism also deny the possibility of human evolution. It is a falling back from the great possibility that revolution offers: the total transformation of human beings. When this happens, you destroy the possibility of achieving the ultimate. You fall back; you again become like animals. To me, further evolution is possible only with individual responsibility. You alone are responsible! This responsibility is a great blessing in disguise. With this individual responsibility comes the struggle that ultimately leads to choiceless awareness. – OSHO [The Psychology of the Esoteric – 1]

The act of forgiving yourself out loud, speaking has a physical effect on the body. It actually alters your DNA. When you notice a reaction coming to the surface, forgive yourself out loud like mentioned above. Also Put everything into writing. This is how you do proper self-forgiveness. @MiracleMan You can learn how to do self-forgiveness properly with this free course http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/ They also have forums, blogs and other advanced courses to go deeper. Valentin Rozman studied personal development and spirituality for 20 years and he told in one of his videos that those tools triggered the biggest transformation in his self. http://desteniradio.blogspot.si/2016/11/desteni-radio-3-what-is-self-forgiveness.html http://desteni.org/ http://desteniiprocess.com/ https://eqafe.com/ http://destonians.com/ @ajasatya When you get in touch with the emotional pain it's too late. This emotional pain already had a physical effect on your body. Yes, when you get in touch with it, You can stop it for the time being but it Will resurface in the future if you don't change the program from which you are operating.

@Leo Gura @The White Belt I think trying to put one as a priority over the other is a trap. The work should create change in both yourself and others around you simultaneously, as a system. Trying to save yourself and forgetting the suffering of others or save the world and not working on yourself are two false choices that limit the potential transformation to both the person and the sorrounding community. So basically its both, not either/or, not prioritizing one over the other.

The best Self-inquiry is to do do-nothing meditation for 1 hour per day and just look. The heavily contemplative self-Inquiry stuff is important too, it's not an either/or it's a both. But Just meditate and look. Inquire by looking. This is huge. Just meditate and be aware. At the right time, just naturally inquire -- What is the mind? Where are these thoughts coming from? Why is the mind flapping around? What is causing that effect? Etc. Dont be too neurotic about Self-Inquiry. This would be like looking at yourself in the mirror with your nose pressed-up against it for hours. Take a more leisurely, harmonious approach. You are looking and seeing what you are. Don't rush this. It's a lifelong process. Enlightenment is a gradual transformation.

Enlightenment is about realizing that all beliefs are existentially false by being the result of that not merely conceiving the result of that. Don't worry about experiences. Work with the root. This is why Self-Inquiry is so important. Experiences are the result of doing this work, not what enlightenment is. Enlightenment is not a far-out state. Enlightenment is being reality all the time. See -- our realities are augmented by our thought-stories which introduce a lot of fantasy into our "reality". Enlightenment is being reality, but also seeing through the added-on fantasies very acutely, like the magician sees through the illusion of all his magic-tricks. You don't need drugs for enlightened being. People do drugs to explore the shit out of being, to *research being* by *being it*. Enlightenment research is done by BE-ing. But all you need is sober being to be enlightened. Everything else is just higher *research*. Just like you really only need a JD or Juris Doctor degree to practice law but if you had a deeper interest in law you could get the LLM degree with is the Master of Laws degree. But that degree is optional. All you really need to practice law is the JD. Same distinction can be made in enlightenment. All I want is the JD for now. Others on here are pursuing the LLM Degree. Some people on here are still in Undergrad, ya know! It's a mix. You gotta understand that Leo is *researching* the shit out of enlightenment at the Ph.D. level. You need to get to the Bachelor's Degree first. Don't think Enlightenment is a single thing or state or destination. It's an evolution, a life-long transformation. You just need to get on the path in the best way from where you are right now.

Notice when you meditate there are moments when the mind disappears. Really take note of that WITH YOUR BEING not with your conceptual mind. Really start to see that the mind is not you. See and feel and be that very profoundly. Start to be able to distance yourself from the mind like a bird-watcher watching a bird through binoculars. Don't try to force anything. Just be aware of things. Let the monkey-mind chatter away in your ear like an ornery little brother that you will eventually learn to half-ignore. It's like yeah yeah yeah, what? So sorry, I wasn't listening. Haha. It really becomes like that. It's not that you kill the mind it's just that you change the way that you relate to it. Like instead of kicking somebody's ass you just learn how to ignore them. But don't take any of these stories literally, they're just intuition-pumps for you to chew-on before you do your Self-Inquiry work and take a look for real by being the Truth. What is the mind? How does the ego want to cling to the mind? Am I the mind? What is the difference between the mind and awareness? What is the difference between thoughts and the mind? What is the difference between beliefs and thoughts? What are thoughts? What are sounds? Do sounds occur in space and time? Etc. See? All fascinating Self-Inquiry questions to explore. Here's some more: What is the ego? Am I my body and/or brain? Do I have an identity? Does that identity have stable properties? What is this identity? What are these properties? Do I have a stable personality? Could I completely change my personality? What is stopping me from completely changing my personality? What is holding me back in life from doing what my higher-self knows is the right thing to do? Are these obstacles fixed or can they be removed? What are these obstacles really and what are they made of? What is a limiting-belief? How does a limiting-belief gain its traction? How do thoughts limit me? What is permitting thoughts to limit me? How can I unhook limiting-beliefs from me? What is asking these questions? What is aware of all of this? Is that awareness something inside me or outside me? What is a conceptual distinction? How does a conceptual distinction relate to awareness? How does a theory relate to the subject matter or the result that the theory pertains to? Can the ego be destroyed? Do I die when the body and brain die? Does awareness die when the body and brain die? Does the mind die when the body and brain die? What is the relation between awareness and the mind, the relation between awareness and the body, and the relation between awareness and the brain? What is the relation between awareness and you? What is a relation? What is a question? What am I? And so on and on. Fall in love with Self-Inquiry if you wanna make progress with enlightenment. In enlightenment, theory is just scaffolding, pointers to do the Self-Inquiry work. Enlightenment is not a theory. Enlightenment is transformation. The ego wants beliefs and theories, but that's not what you want. You want transformation. Clinging too much to the theory-scaffolding is a huge trap. All beliefs and all theories are existentially false, But only use this as a guide. Don't even cling to this as a belief. The way you look at thoughts will dramatically change from the way you look at them now with enlightenment. If you're stuck in the Rationalist Paradigm, you're not gonna get this. It's just gonna sound wrong to you. Watch all the videos I attached below. Separate yourself from the Mind-Matrix. It will still be there, but your awareness of the Truth will change how you attach to things at the being level (I'm not talking about attachment to beliefs or thoughts here). Remember, this is about being differently not about thinking differently. This should change how you BE, how you are. You are looking for a being-transformation not a belief-transformation. These words are just scaffolding to get you to be differently. And that's why you just need to get in there, open up the hood, don't be afraid to get your hands dirty, and tinker-around inside your being. That's what Self-Inquiry is all about. Everything else is just pre-algebra compared to Self-Inquiry. This is so hard to explain too because we operate on the "knowing = belief" paradigm. Here we need to change that paradigm to the "knowing = being" paradigm for enlightenment work. You gotta literally jump from one paradigm to another one here, from one bubble to another bubble. And there's no easy, primrose path to do this. You gotta grab your druthers and make that discontinuous flyin'-leap from one paradigm to the next one! How many people can actually do this? How many people will do this? Videos on point to watch:

This is my favorite topic in the world. And I'm glad you asked this. I'm also a professional musician and have been obsessed with everything music since I was 5 years old. In fact there's a great book written on this: The Secret Power of Music which I highly recommend to get a more big picture view of what music really is and where it comes from and how it has evolved. There are chapters about the original "om" sound from India and then goes to describe more modern styles of classical, avant-garde, jazz, blues, pop, etc. Although I don't share the author's extreme views on this (and the book was also written in the 80s) but his thesis is interesting. According to the author, pop culture/music has been a pretty accurate reflection of the culture and where humanity is at in terms of spiritual progress. Yes and no... that's a big topic. He favors Bach and composers who write from a place of beauty/God and disdains pretty much anything from 1900 and forwards. LOL I personally love pop music (by which i mean pretty much all modern styles) and I'm fascinated with how it has evolved and integrated different styles. I also went through different phases during my life where I was into all kinds of crazy shit. **** It's important to develop an awareness in our actions and desires. Not just listen to music on a surface level or to escape or to re-affirm existing identities. I have always found questionable the practice of listening to just one style or genre of music. And denying or neglecting other forms. This is just pure ego (the bad kind). Even one genre is so broad that I find it's usually 99% garbage and 1% good. This goes for metal, classical, blues, jazz, fusion, techno, trance, mainstream pop, folk, world, etc. Music is music. Art is art. What does that mean? Rhythm. Melody. Harmony. Poetry (words). Craftsmanship. Sound. Emotion. Vibe. Groove. Expression. Transcendence. Pain. Joy. What exactly do you like about a certain piece of music? Start listening to it deeper than before. It can become a meditation. Are the band playing off each other and taking the song higher (like Stairway To Heaven)? Do you like the cold electronic atmosphere of a Brian Eno ambient piece? Maybe you love the bassline in an outro of a Coldplay song (they are masters of creating great outros)? Or maybe just the raw intensity and energy of a song (Slayer's "Disciple") that could propel a jet? Have you ever listened to Metallica's "And Justice For All" album on LSD? I have... Not a pleasant experience! lol I had to turn it off after a few minutes of "Blackened" (the first track)... lol I felt like my ego was swallowing me and the music became a blackhole of eternal ear fucking. So much anger and darkness there and you can really feel it when you get deep into it. We attract and love what we are deep inside. If you want anger and intense energy, then that will feel good. If you want beauty and peace, not so much. I think there are times for both. Perhaps we all need a little drunken Jack Daniels sex with some dirty slut, fucking to the hypnotic machine gun riffs of Metallica's "One" in a sleezy motel in the middle of a desert somewhere every now and again Or maybe not! Depends what you're into... But I love 80s Metallica. Yet they were really angry guys and fucked up. But they transcended that. You can feel that with some artists how music keeps them sane and not killing others. That is a beautiful thing and I think that process deserves recognition. Even channelling anger into something as controlled and creative as music can be a very beautiful thing. That is in essence a spiritual process. Metallica's singer is now married with kids and sober. Yeah his music kinda sucks now but in some ways he got a little bit free (with the success of his band). In other ways he's become trapped in his own creation of "the singer from Metallica" and his art has suffered for that. Same with the Rolling Stones guys who haven't created anything to the standards of their 60s-70s stuff when they were so high that they probably don't even remember it. Fuck, don't get me started on this shit. I could go on forever. But it's a great question and can be broadened out to mass entertainment in general. What does it say about our society that shows like Breaking Bad are so powerful? Sure that show is very violent and dark and dramatic. It's also a great story and a cautionary tale. I get a lot out of these kinds of shows. They are inspiring. A lot of emotional depth and heavy social criticism considering we are rooting for an anti-hero??!!? Yes it's entertainment too and perhaps overly dramatic in how such incredible events play out in such a small time frame. Unrealistic? Perhaps, I don't know. ******* All art is a form of finding/identifying beauty where there is great suffering and even sorrow. Great artists are able to take that process of transcendence from a wide variety of sources and create something new that really connects with many people. They are able to access some place that you can only get to with the experience of their creation. They become Gods. And we feel less alone in this universe that might feel alone also in a place where billions of universes exist. We are all artists if we choose to become conscious of that and live as creators instead of victims. We are Creating our lives. We are transcending OUR suffering and making sense of it. Maybe this comforts us. And if we are comforted, perhaps others will be too. Humans respond to universal values: Beauty, truth, love, community, etc. Even the metal guys who dress up in all that silly leather and makeup and darkness are secretly yearning for love and unity with God. They feel connected when they listen to their identities being accepted, even if it's for that 3-4 minutes. They meet friends into the same shit, go to shows, dress the part, etc. Community. Tribe mentality. Same as the hipsters or jazz nerds or classical snobs. Same shit, different underwear. Just be careful, this can all be a trap. You have to be able to live without music and in total silence for 1-2 months. Otherwise it's an addiction and will just feed the hungry ghost within. Use music as a form of celebration of life and all it's incredible colors and scents and sounds. Listen to ALL kinds of music. Learn to appreciate things that you don't necessarily like. Find the essence of the song you love and understand it, study it, meditate with it, masturbate to it. Take a shit on it and drink your own cum with it. Is Justin Bieber completely bullshit? Or is music his salvation and a way to give value to millions of teenagers around the world who scream and screech at the thought of him? What the fuck is going on there? Beatlemania, Backstreet Boys, Michael Jackson, etc... Why are these Norwegians worshipping the devil and killing each other when they live in such a great place? Were they ass fucked as children or something and that creates a cult??? What the fuck is going on there. People want their Gods so they can have someone to worship and make them feel that life is not just a fucking ant factory that repeats for 100 years until you drop dread and everyone has a party for you but you can't make it so they cry. Although such lyrics might sound hollow and vain on the surface... Maybe they are not what they seem. These could also be a desperate cry to reunite with the beloved (god, truth, love, etc). They are just masquerading as teenage disneyland fairytale lovestories, that endless cycle most people go through again and again. Most people never mature from that. Kids raising kids. We fall in love with someone... why? Because everyone is looking for the same thing. Freedom. Liberation. Enlightenement = to surrender to light and let yourself shine. They try to find it through drugs and fucking and food and movies and christmas and jesus and all that bullshit. If you have been put in a microwave when you were 2, and were not loved, you will do whatever it takes to find that love. Heroin? The easiest way. Addicted for life. To love. You will sell your grandma to feel that love. Whatever it takes. ******** Do not be fooled by what you think your emotions mean and who you think you are and what you think others are. We are much much much more than that. As i said, we are all artists, creators. Gods and Goddesses. Admiring our creations and trying to outwit each other and the devils in our black iron hearts. But like monkeys who spend 4 hours in the wild foraging and hunting... you know what they do for the rest of the day when not sleeping? Annoying each other. So that's why we fiddle with our balls and scratch our vaginas all day and smelling our fingers, reading shit online and wanting more out of life and dreaming of life in paradise. ***** I see many people on these forums and in everyday life being stuck as the person they are. Yet they want things that require them to be somebody they are not. People want more freedom and happiness and joy and money and love. They want all this change but they don't want to change. So they keep listening to the same music and liking the same things they used to like. They dress the same. They hold on to their ideas and beliefs about who they think they are and what annoys them. How many times do you do that every day? It's all a bullshit world you have created in your head to feel safe and comfortable. The problem is that you created it as a default mechanism before you were conscious enough to make your own decisions. You are a product. A domisticated animal. Free range human. You're welcome to leave the herd and step out into the wilderness. You want that dont you? It excites you. It makes your pussy wet and your dick hard. But you are afraid of freedom. ******* Strip yourself of all identity and create a person who has abundance of the things you want. This transformation will be painful. But worth it. Otherwise you are just left around wondering and in this eternal state of purgatory like all the 99.99999% humans who were to scared to change and died mediocre. Leo created his Life Purpose course to help you break free. There are books and people and art who will help you also if you start using them for that and seeking out the great works of history. You have to find what you really value in life and create a meaningful life around that. That's why you are here. You are still reading this crazy post of mine that just came out of me like a hungry dinosaur uncaged. ****** Become Who You Really Are. That's the only God I serve. Hence my profile name

Over the past two months I have done serious thinking and meditating on my life purpose. Within this time I have also noticed some very deep changes in my meditation practice and its overarching effects in my life. I feel that right now I am at a critical tipping point in my life and it is crucial that I follow my intuition fully. With this being said I feel that I am in need of some much required guidance. As my journey continues I am now beginning to realize the depth of the path that I have chosen and it is only a matter of time until I can no longer live the life that I am currently living. For the past three years I have done much work on myself and have deeply perused meditation, consciousness and enlightenment. I now have come to a point where things must change in my external life. I have learned a massive amount of information on my own time in the past three years. My insatiable appetite for learning has helped to radically and profoundly change my way of thinking, how I see the world and how I live my life. The experiences and lessons that I have learned through the countless hours of meditation and contemplation, unitive experiences and psychedelic experiences have shown me so much about the true nature of reality. My mind has expanded to such a degree in its perception and thinking that I know there is absolutely no going back. And thus this has led me to a sort of conundrum. I do not know how to properly balance the divine with the mundane. Over the past two months my meditation practice has caused changes in my nervous system and I have experienced several strange phenomena in my body that I can only describe as kundalini symptoms. These symptom include but are not limited to a tingling sensation throughout my body at random times in the day, feeling a powerful surge rise up my spine and explode in my head whenever I meditate for roughly an hour. I have experienced the bilateral symmetrical fractal energetic yoga positions that martin ball talks about several times and their frequency is increasing. The most apparent of these symptoms are similar to convulsions. If I go deep enough into meditation and contemplation parts of my body or even my whole body will begin to uncontrollably spasm. While this does not cause pain it is still a jarring experience. All in all my dedication to this consciousness work has created variables in my life that are making it increasingly difficult for me to continue to live a seemingly “normal” life. I have brought books on the subject of kundalini and energy to better my understanding of the subject. I feel that it is only a matter of time until something is going to have to radically change. Due to the nature of these symptoms and the depth of which I have experienced the unity of existence thus far in my journey part of the ego has become heavily resistant to the path. I feel that if I continue to do my dedicated meditation, contemplation, psychedelics, fasting, and other practices that I am using to facilitate higher understanding of consciousness, awakening and existence that I may destroy my life. I feel that I will go so far out into the left field with meditation and consciousness work that I will be entirely unable to integrate into society. I do not wish for this to happen and so since these kundalini symptoms have arisen I have largely toned down my practice, however I know that if I want to continue make progress on this path that I cannot achieve that at a low level of practice. Several of the problems that the human species is facing are readily apparent to me and with this awareness it is difficult for me to witness the overwhelming majority of people I encounter have such a degree of unawareness of these things. The interactions I have at work, school and in public are all inauthentic now as I must censor myself, so to speak, If I am to avoid being marginalized by society. I have been keeping up with Leo's blog posts and his critiques of the education system truly resonate with me and I completely agree with him. In my life I have found that autodidactism has been far more effective in my life than the current education system has ever been for me, both in high school and college. I feel that there is an opportunity cost for me being in school in that it takes away from the time in which I could be educating myself via autodidactism. I have learned so many profound and life changing things as a result of the hundreds of hours of reading books, studies, watching videos and documentaries on various topics such as meditation, spirituality, psychedelics, integral theory, self-development, veganism, sustainability, ecology, futurism, health, fitness, post scarcity economics, space exploration, biology, paleontology and more. I never heard very much highly in depth discussion at all of any of the aforementioned subjects in school and when one was mentioned it was only briefly outlined. It is a system which neglects so many of the variables in human learning and it is stuck in the industrial era. In school teachers can’t teach what they want as they must adhere to a strict curriculum and student’s natural curiosity and creativity is all too often crushed by years of conformity. In one of Leo's blog posts he wrote QUOTE "This might be rosy retrospection on my part, but if I could live my life over again, I would quit school, never go to college, and invest all that time into self-education. The more I learn, the more I learn how poorly learning is done by our social schooling system. It's really just terrible. It emphasizes all the wrong subjects and mechanizes what should otherwise be a highly conscious activity." END QUOTE In a more recent blog post of his I read QUOTE "Our school systems are all nonsynergetic. We take the whole child and fractionate the scope of his or her comprehending coordination by putting the children in elementary schools — to become preoccupied with elements or isolated facts only. Thereafter we force them to choose some specialization, forcing them to forget the whole. --required a wide variety of brain slaves with which to logistically and ballistically overwhelm those who opposed their expansion of physical conquest." END QUOTE I am very close to the point that I can no longer partake in the education system. I have completed two years of college so far and the mentality that I am surrounded by in academia is so restrictive that it is causing sadness within me. Each time I enter my classes I can feel my soul being crushed. Don’t get me wrong, education is extremely important, which is why I heavily emphasize autodidactism. I learn as much as I can in my free time, however the schooling system is just so broken and I simply want to be free from it and live my life. To be honest I don’t truly want to be in college, however I enrolled and stay because of family pressure. I get good grades but I truly don’t think it’s worth it. I would rather be happy in life than have a high GPA. I learn much more effectively when I study about the subjects I am passionate about when I take my own time to learn them. Nearly all of my time outside of school and work is spent reading and meditating. Right now I am in a time of turning and transformation. I could use some guidance regarding what I have mentioned as I know that there are many people here with far more experience with these things than I am. My only outlet for much of the knowledge that I have amassed over the course of the past three years is the book I am currently writing. I feel that having a creative outlet is something that is critically important for me to have in my life and for people to have in general. Disseminating the information that I have absorbed on this journey has helped me in in the past five months to resolve and work through many of the blockages that I have been experiencing. It would be greatly appreciated if anyone could provide advice and insight to help me during this time in my experience.

I think of it this way: If you truly beliefe, that you are ok, you also accept your interiour motivation for growth and transformation. And then it's no about correcting mistakes but about being the continuous change that you already are. By being totally ok with yourself, you become a resistanceless outlet for the innate creativity of reality. Adyashanti is a great example for someone that has truly realized, being ok with himself. BUT for him, being ok not just a belief but an actual truth.

A lot of ideas and insights came together last night during the contemplation session. I've been having very ambitious goal of trying to redesign my own system of learning information and have been developing new techniques of organizing, sorting, storing, connecting, visualizing, integrating and trying to build the foundation/framework for optimized learning. I have taken insights from these books: Unlimited Memory, How to Read a Book, Systems Thinking and Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself, I have connected a lot of great insights from these books which developed into new insights of my own which I'm now intergrating and experimenting with to create this optimized system of learning. So far I have the following tools for this system: myths, metaphors (programming, movies, nature, yoga, video games), quotes, symbols, systems thinking, life experiences, mystical experiences, books, life constants (change, direction, elevation, birth, death, ego, truth, yin/yang, perception, language, emotions etc.) - all of these foundational tools, when connected can create a very powerful system for effeciently storing, organizing, remembering and articulating information. Leonardo da Vinci's quote "Learn how to see. Realize that everything connects to everything else." came to mind once again, during last night's contemplation as I started seeing how all these things are connected, was it a coincidence that when I walked out of the closet during the 5g mushroom trip, around 5 months ago, I looked at myself in the full body mirror, stretched my arms to the sides and immediately had a flash of Leonardo's Vitruvian Man in my mind. Or is it a coincidence that my first vivid childhood memory is of me being about 2-3 years old putting together jigsaw pieces of the puzzle? Am I putting life's jigsaw pieces of the puzzle together by connecting all these insights together and starting to see more areas of this beautiful piece of artwork? As I contemplated more on The Fellowship of the River, especially on the "meat" of the ideas that really stood out to me in the book, which talked about epigenetic programming and how it's our "seat of the seat of the soul", and how through shamanic healing and medicine plants we gain access to this code and heal/re-code this "maladaptive epigenetic programming", which we have learned or "designed" in our systems during childhood. I connected the concepts from programming and systems thinking and realized how similar human beings are to machines/systems/programs. Just like machines, we get input in the form of information and output in the form of behaviors and thoughts which make up our whole reality. Epigenetic code can be thought of as a system's structure, the interface from which all the other classes inherit. Taking the concept of "life's constants" I now thought of "healing" as the same as change, we are re-programming, redesigning, debugging, fixing this "soul code", all of these higher level words fall under the big one which is change, evolution, transformation, the cycle of life is all change, "the only constant in life is change". There are high level, senior programmers who design the system interface/structure, they can be thought of as architects and they get paid higher salaries accordingly. On the lower levels, there are junior programmers who "do the messy" work of actually writing the code, all of which inherits and follows the rules written by the system architects. Similarly, we can try to re-design our thought systems by trying to install new affirmation, telling ourselves we are confident and that we are worthy of love. However, if our epigenetic system's structure is flawed, based on the maladaptive patterns we have acquired from childhood, this would be like a junior programmer trying to fix the code on a "low level" and expecting to fix the core structure of the system. By attaining higher levels of consciousness and through mystical experiences, we can have access and heal/change/reprogram our structure of epigenetic system which may be malfunctioning and creating all kinds of illnesses in our lives which the modern Western healthcare system can only patch up, in a similar way a junior programmer would create a short term solution without addressing structural system flaws. Indigenous shamanism and plant medicine has been completely ignored by the modern scientific community for a long time, but thanks to researches at John Hopkins like Dr. Griffiths who have been experimenting with high doses of psilocybin, and people like Joe, these things are finally starting to come to light and I think eventually the modern science will merge with the mystical experiences and the two will work together to really heal people's root problems. Of course, this won't be easy, "the goal of every system is to ensure it's own perpetuity", so it seems like our system has been doing everything it can to distract, mislead, misinform and turn people away from these "alternative" healing methods. That's why I see Joe as one of the great leaders in this movement who has been on both sides of the fence and is truly writing from a place of love and authenticity, I can intuit that his primary purpose is really about healing people. I think the programming metaphor can be expanded even further, there are loops, variables, constants, arrays, databases, inputs, outputs, patterns, frameworks, user interfaces - all of these concepts are connected to how we function as advanced biological machines (who are now becoming cyborgs by integrating ourselves so much with the technology surrounding us). I thought about the MVC framework which stands for Model - View - Controller is programming, designed specifically for creating web sites more efficiently. The Model is the database, the structure of the system (epigenetic programming), the View is what we see on the web page (our pereception and view of reality, the quality of our consciousness) and Controller (the mediator between the database Model and the View) which is our mind, it's the we process information from our database of epigenetic code and then transfer the information to our perceptions of reality. I think most people don't have a clue how much their level of perceiving reality is screwed, and these very same people live in a very rigid model of reality which "can't change, it's who they are". I've been that way for a very long time, the mushroom experience was able to snap me out of that endless "do-while" hell loop I've programmed into my sub-conscious, because it has intervented on the level of paradigm, which is the best way to re-structure the system according to systems thinking book - "people who have managed to intervene in systems at the level of paradigm have hit a leverage point that totally transforms systems." This is exactly how I see powerful psychedelic experiences, and it's the only way I was able to break out of that loop. Of course, much work is to be done after the experience which involves learning, integrating, processing, connecting and re-building and redesigning our structure of the system, otherwise the experience will just fade away into distant memory. "What I really want to underscore...is that because these mystical experiences give rise to these trait-level changes in spirituality and altruism, gratitude, forgiveness, and interpersonal closeness, they really appear foundational to our deepest ethical and moral understanding, the pro-social impulse of mutual care taking and therefore further research into the causes and consequences of these absolutely extraordinary experiences is very likely to be crucial, ultimately to the survival of our species." ~Roland Griffiths, John Hopkins University, Psychedelic Science 2017

This one depicts us as the universe, inseperable, timeless, but also reflects a mindfullness that comes with the human form. Creation and destruction, the ever going transformation and birth of the self, the now.

Well, considering how @Leo Gura has mentioned that he's writing a book (which I'll be first in line for as soon as it comes out), I might as well get more of my own stuff out there so no one thinks I'm copying. Also, I can't emphasize how much writing helps. In particular, writing basically eliminates the monkey mind 'problem' by giving your mind a rubik's cube to solve -- how to describe whatever it is you want to describe. Anyway, here's another section: How to use this book - The Nature of Enlightenment “The most profound insights arise from questioning the overlooked obvious” – Peter Ralston 260 BC - Hiero’s new crown pleased him. To celebrate his long climb to the top of royalty, he’d appointed a goldsmith to make him the most beautiful wreath ever as a message to everyone else. After weeks of work, the goldsmith produced a masterpiece - a wreath truly worthy of the gods. Indeed, it seemed no mortal man could have produced such a wreath. The commoners began rumors that the king’s wreath was not made out of gold, but silver, which is much easier to work with. Heiro could not stand such scandal. He might as well have been a king without a crown. So, he held a public trial for the Goldsmith and the crown. If the crown was made out of gold, the Goldsmith would be awarded with even greater money than before and Heiro would look like a just, benevolent ruler. If not, the Goldsmith would be tortured in front of the city as a warning to anyone who tried to mess with royalty. The goldsmith’s talent ran in the family, as exemplified by his cousin Archimedes. Not only did Archimedes use calculus to prove the area of the circle 2,000 years before the actual invention of calculus, but he also invented hydrostatics and the compound pulley. For this reason, Archimedes was the first person the goldsmith went to for help. “I have two days before they kill me!” the goldsmith cried to Archimedes, “I don’t know how to prove to the king that the crown is made out of gold other than destroying it and showing him the insides. But I can’t destroy my life’s work – we all know the gods would punish me for doing so! Then again, I don’t want to die for my masterpiece, either!” Archimedes got to work immediately. Prior experience told him that gold and silver had different weights at the same overall size. If he could figure out the size of the crown, then he could compare it to the a known amount of pure gold of the same size to tell if it was real. But there was a problem: up to that point in history, no one could figure out how to measure the volume of an object with an irregular shape. I mean just look at the thing - do you sacrifice accuracy by using a big ruler, or do you waste time by using a tiny ruler, one which will still contain inaccuracies? Archimedes spent all day and night trying to come up with solution to this issue. Alas, nothing worked. Dejected, Archimedes went to take what he knew was to be his final bath before the king killed his cousin and then killed him for helping a traitor like his cousin. As he stepped into the bath, Archimedes noticed that the water level rose. As he got his whole body in, it approached the top of the bath itself. And when he placed his arm in the water, some of it splashed out the sides. At that moment, insight struck him: the volume of water displaced must be equal to the volume of the part of his body he had submerged. "Eureka! Eureka! (I found it! I found it!)" Proclaimed Archimedes. Eager to share his discovery, Archimedes leapt out of his bathtub and ran through the streets of Syracuse naked telling everyone of his discovery. ---- Most people think of this Eureka moment as happening in an instant. This is only partially true. See, Insights transcend the term “slow” and “fast,” existing in an nigh-unknowable plane of hidden mystical awareness. Insights are partially “slow” because they usually need time to incubate. Like Archimedes, you need: · Previous experiences that give you lessons · Time spent concentrating and contemplating over a topic · And a little bit of mental relaxation for ideas to float in. But once you build the correct scaffolding, insights seem to come out of nowhere and they do so almost instantly. The key is to recognize that this is different from thinking. Thinking usually involves a step by step series of problem solving. That takes too long. Direct Insight - involves an actual recognition of something. When you open your mind to the new possibilities, there’s a sudden shift in perspective where that which didn’t seem to exist suddenly exists. Again, the truth is that nothing changes: you simply realize that which was always there in the first place. Archimedes didn’t invent the fact that you can measure density using water, he discovered a fact that was always there. The same is true for enlightenment. Except you probably don’t realize that yet. In particular, you think you can’t become enlightened or haven’t already had Enlightments. This is because of shit marketing tactics and the natural human tendency to not investigate things on ones own with open-mindedness. See, like Archimedes, you too will be partially tempted to run around naked telling everyone of the Absolute Truth. Its just too obvious and too amazing not to. On the other hand, the answer is so simple, you’re not going to want to say anything. After meditating for 42 days and realizing enlightenment, Siddartha said “I truly attained nothing from complete, unexcelled Enlightenment,” Immediately afterwards, Siddartha, now the Buddha, went off to the mountains to live alone. He figured there was just no way anyone would get it if he talked about what it is he ‘got’ because there was just nothing to say. After a while, however, people started begging him for help. They’d heard of his enlightenment and wanted a piece of it for themselves. He refused to budge. One day, someone pointed out that if he were to help, then eventually, someone would ‘get it.’ With the hope that just someone somewhere might get it, he began teaching. His first teaching consisted of sitting silently while he stared at the crowd. This continued for a few years, much to everyone’s frustration. His second teaching consisted of telling everyone that he was not a teacher, no one should quote him, and that nothing he was about to say was actually true. This continued for a few years, much to everyone’s frustration. His third teaching consisted of telling everyone to stop relying on teachers and to see the truth for themselves. This continued for a few years, much to everyone’s frustration. After a while, he gave up on that and started alluding to regular sensory experiences to try to point out what’s up with reality. Now everyone was happy. Unlike the density of an object, the Absolute Truth cannot be spoken. At best, the Absolute Truth can be pointed to with analogies and stories. When egos run upon these stories its up to them to see what’s being pointed to on their own. And the problem with that is that egos exist in almost direct opposition to the truth: you are immortal, infinite, and omnipotent; the ego convinces you that you are mortal, finite, and of limited potential. Moreover, the only way for you to ‘get that you’re immortal is that the ego has to go away long enough for you to see that yes, you really are immortal. To the ego, going away equates to death. That is, in all seriousness, to become immortal you have to die. You can see how this could create problems. Mainly, one faces the question of how to convince people to go on an inward journey even though they think they have a bunch of stuff going on outside themselves. The next question is how you are going to get them to kill what-they-think-of-as-themselves without having them literally take a knife and slit their wrists. Intro to Marketing 101: You tell them it’s more worth their time than anything else. You tell them enlightenment is this grandiose thing filled with extra universes and heavenly figures and eternal bliss. You tell them that its some near impossible journey only taken by heroes, legends, and gods and that they are brave for starting such a journey. You tell them that it costs no money and that by even beginning to ask about enlightenment, it’s their destiny to attain it. Oops, my bad. I got ahead of myself. That’s not marketing 101. That’s Intro to Marketing 100: fucking lie to them. Tell them something that’s true, but not really. Tell them just enough that they feel happy enough to spread the word, but just enough that everyone else can accept easily. Don’t tell them the whole truth because the whole fucking truth cannot actually be told. Turn the Truth into a meme. Make it something that follows the SUCCES model of making lessons stick: Simple, Unexpected, Concrete, Credible, Emotional, and Storied. Don’t make people think too hard – their own biology prevents them from doing so. Tell them that Jesus died on the cross for you to tell you that you are a child of God. The Buddha sat under a tree to figure out that when he became enlightened, everyone became enlightened because he is the same as everyone anyway. Krishna has your back as long as you focus on doing you and becoming the best person you can. Yes, it's true, but no, it's not at all what you think it actually is because the truth is far more nuanced yet simple at the same time. Think about it: for basically everything in life, we need previous experiences and understandings before we can accept new experiences and understandings, but for the Absolute Truth, we must find something that rests on absolutely no prior experience or understanding for it is that which is prior to all experiences and understandings. Most people can barely get past the first layer of questioning themselves when you ask them why they do the things they do. Forget the second layer. And Fuck the third layer, that one’s impossible. Enlightenment, on the other hand, literally requires coming up with the answer to an infinite regression of questions. Do you really think people are going to do sit down and do this for no reason? And yet what’s Absolutely Hilarious – the Kosmic Joke - is that everyone can do it. I mean it. I really mean it. I really really mean it. That’s what drives some enlightened people insane. They can’t help but do something to let everyone know what’s up. Put it this way: a few months ago, I went to watch my 5-year-old cousin play T-ball. In case you didn’t know (or otherwise didn’t have a childhood growing up cough), T-ball is a form of baseball where, instead of having people throw the ball at the batter, the ball would sit on a mount, absolutely motionless and easily available to knock out of the park. It’s supposed to be so easy, even a 5-year-old kid could do it. To my amusement, the kids would take a swing and totally miss. Sometimes, they’d line up to bat looking in the wrong direction, as if they were going to hit the ball into the fence behind them. It was the cutest thing ever. You too would think to yourself how is this possible? But you couldn’t run onto the field and play T-ball for them. They have to figure it out on their own. This is the feeling I get when it comes to discussions about nature of enlightenment. Its like Humanity has basically been stuck in a 10,000 year old Abbott and Costello Who’s on first skit that mixes the words you, nothing, truth, infinity, god, allah, the higgs boson field, the universe, simulation theory, consciousness, and " " (wordless expression). Everyone’s talking about the same thing, but every time someone kind of gets it, they proceed to get mad at everyone else for being 'wrong,' even though they’re basically just as wrong and just as right. Human nature is basically a process of spiraling from one description to the other, flipping off the other descriptions until you realize that they're all capital-I 'It' masking itself through words. ----- We’ve all had insights. And so, part of us gets why Archimedes ran around naked. We also know that when we have insights they kind of just strike us out of nowhere. In particular, we have to try really really hard and then, just let go and take a nice bath to clear your mind. Now I want you to imagine that you can have an insight into the biggest questions of life. If you’re not sure what questions those are, let me get you started: 1. What is consciousness? 2. Does God exist? 3. Is our universe real? Are we in a simulation? 4. Do we have free will? 5. What is the universe made of? 6. What is Truth? How do I know what is right or wrong? 7. Why is there something rather than nothing? 8. How do we stop ourselves and the universe around us from dying? (Foreshadow: How do you prevent the 2nd law of thermodynamics from taking us over?) 9. How did life begin? 10. Are we alone in the universe? Both us as individuals and humans as a species? 11. What makes us human? Why? 12. Why do we dream? 13. Can you really experience anything objectively? 14. Why is there stuff? 15. Are there other universes? 16. Why is math so accurate? What are numbers? 17. What is at the bottom of a black hole? 18. Is time travel possible? 19. What will be the fate of our species? Our universe? 20. Why is the universe so exquisitely balanced such that life can exist? 21. Is there life after death? 22. What is the meaning of life? 23. What is beauty? 24. What am I supposed to do with my life? This is the type of stuff that enlightenment refers to. I’m not exaggerating. You can answer all of these with the same insight: The Absolute Truth = Consciousness = You = Pure Awareness = Absolute Infinity = Pure Imagination = The Universe = God = Nothing = Everything = All = Zero/Zero = “ “ (there is no actual word for it) So without further ado, here’s what enlightenment is: Enlightenment is insight to the Absolute Truth. It is direct consciousness of what-is as-it-is for-itself as-itself. It is insight into that which is Absolutely True about the nature of reality, the nature of the self, and the nature of existence. Here are other clarifications: · It is NOT something that happens only once -- You can keep having insights that go deeper and deeper into the same subject: Absolute truth, the same way you can view a diamond form many angles. · It is NOT strictly Either-or -- Although yes, the insight itself is either-or, you may have different glimpses of insight at different moments such that you awaken more to the truth just like you get better at using the multiplication table once you understand it and begin to apply it in new ways. · It is NOT the same as personal transformation -- The truth specifically does not change and transformation is, by definition, change. What happens is that the truth allows you to have a significantly easier time changing your behavioral patterns. · It is NOT impossible -- If anything its pretty easy once you set up the proper mental and physical systems for attaining insight. You can definitely do it! And once you know what to generally look for, insights will start coming by the boat load. · It is NOT 'eternal bliss, no matter what' -- Sorry kid, you’re always going to have problems as long as you live the life of a human. Thats just what we do - make up problems for ourselves. In fact, trying to go for eternal bliss will probably just cause more suffering. As Rick Sanchez once said, "you want to *burp* rip that band-aid off now. You'll thank me later" · It is NOT Something you perceive, in particular it must involve some out-of-this-world emotional, sensational, or physical experience; nope, the world basically stays the same. -- Put it this way: intuitively grasping the Pythagorean theorem makes math more beautiful, but its not like your paper flew out of the room and turn into an angel. (Sidenote: I admit however, that if you saw your paper fly out of the room and turn into an angel, it would probably make enlightenment easier.) · It is NOT unavailable to you now -- Enlightenment is always and only available NOW. Stop waiting for it to happen in the future. Enlightenment is available at any point, and at any time the way insight is always available to Archimedes. Open your mind up to possibilities and allow for impossibilities. It will be almost like an "aha!" moment, but it won't actually require thinking other than focused contemplation mixed with some looseness from psychedelics or simple relaxation. What we're looking for requires recognition, which seems like thinking, but it's an entirely different mode of perception. Its like when you cross your eyes to look at one of those 3D puzzles and boom it just pops out: reality is neither matter nor hallucination - it just kind of is and it is all and you are its source and you are all and you are everyone and everyone is all which means that it is no one person except that it is all one person. Trust me, that last sentence will make sense as soon as you 'get it.' Maybe this section of this book will make you ‘get it’. Maybe another section will. Maybe it will take a re-reading. Maybe, you’ll get it while taking a bath 60 years down the line. Be ready. Be aware. Be open. Enlightenment will mean the end of your journey. You’ll be done. You’ll just know. Pure and simple. You’ll understand why it is that some of the things that have been marketed to you the way that they’ve been marketed to you. That is, you’ll begin to see that them as partially true, and in some cases, totally possible accounts of reality. You’ll to see them as partially wrong, and in some cases, totally impossible accounts of reality. Heaven Exists, but it’s not what you think of. The Gates of Heaven Exist too, but the Gate is a Gateless Gate. The implications of the existence of absolute truth as nothing but pure indistinct imagination are so crazy, yet elegant, so chaotic, yet simple it will blow your fucking mind. Enlightenment will also mean the beginning of your journey. You’ll find yourself on your knees, trying to pick up pieces of your mind back up off the floor from having been blown to bits. This will take the rest of your lifetime. And If you’re at all curious like me, your first enlightenment will just make you want to have more enlightenments. Everyone knows that One answer begets five more questions. This is just as true for The One Answer. Enlightenment will also mean that that there is no beginning – there is no end. Life itself becomes this never-ending series of insights to be had about the same thing - you. Everywhere you look at becomes a series of clues, all pointing to final puzzle piece that restarts the whole puzzle - Everything. Except that the puzzle is infinitely big and infinitely small and infinitely long and infinitely wide and so it doesn’t even have a final piece - Nothing. As you might imagine, this makes every day inexplicably exciting and full of wonder of some greater force – God. ----- Archimedes didn’t stop working on mathematics after helping his cousin. He began wondering about the nature of circles, for he intuited that circles held a view of the Absolute Truth. While he worked on this problem over the next few years, the Roman Empire toppled the Greek Empire. Archimedes barely noticed as his house got stripped away and the Romans forced him to live on the streets. It didn’t matter if he was Greek or Roman – that stuff was all relative. It only mattered that he find the Absolute Truth. One day, a high-ranking Roman soldier came up to Archimedes as he sat on the road drawing circles. The soldier commanded him to make way for the passing Roman guard. But Archimedes, in the middle of solving a problem involving circles, refused to budge. The soldier grew enraged – for what reason does this poor old Greek commoner disobey his commands? “Nothing,” Archimedes replied, “Don’t disturb my circles.” The soldier promptly ran through Archimedes with his sword. Archimedes had good reason to not move. ---- The Main Point: Enlightenment = insight to the nature of nature itself. No more, no less. Focus, relax, boom.

I resonate with the following The Lone wolf The quitter The person with low self-esteem The perfectionist I try to get past these by working on myself everyday. For example I'm trying to work on not being a quitter by pushing myself a little more and believing that if I can do this, I can also do that.... so far it's helping. Although breaking out of these modes of behavior requires intense discipline and self transformation. @Joseph Maynor Btw the labels are really cool.. Perfect description of different personalities.

I've been thinking about this subject a bit over the last day and have some slightly off topic thoughts about the subject of healing itself, and of pursuing various modalities. More specifically for people who are seeking to heal difficulties in their life. I hope it isn't minded if I share my perspective in this thread for fun as well as personal processing: If memory serves, I have heard a few times that specific or overt focus on chakras isn't always a good idea. I think it is because if one doesn't quite know what they're doing then sometimes at best it may be a bit clumsy, and at worst it can cause imbalance, disturbances. etc. Some pursue chakra healing in order to alleviate certain life circumstances and may wish to focus on 'clearing' a particular energy center. The risk is that this may come without awareness that their subject has its corresponding imprints throughout the entire energetic column that would ideally unravel in its own elegant way, as opposed to our desire to really push through it. Sudden releases of energy into 'unrefined' centers can be strenuous both physically and to the psyche. Not to say that I think working with energy or chakras is invalid; rather perhaps it can be a very useful paradigm for some, and a distraction for others. I'll elaborate on why. It's fascinating to explore just what healing actually is. At one level it is useful to examine it as part of cause and effect, but often in my experience it seems to be occurring completely of its own volition in accordance with a divine intelligence. Effective healing seems to be less about doing and more about releasing control to allow that intelligence to flow. My understanding is that reiki doesn't require a lifetime of study or extensive knowledge of the energetic system, on the contrary it can be learned relatively quickly, even intuitively. This is ideal, after all; how could the mind work with such profound and complex levels of energetic orchestration? it cannot, but it can release itself to allow the higher intelligence/energy to guide the practitioner and do what it intends to do. This allowing is the principle of Yin (the feminine, the receptive, flowing, pregnant, awareness,) Therefore I think it can be said that if you are guided to any practice via your heart/intuition (yin) then I would say that it's going to be useful for you. Trouble arises, however, when we are more forcefully seeking healing as a result of our ego (ego as manifestation of Yang: the masculine, the creative, the penetrative) trying to lead and make healing 'happen'. When yang tries to lead, chaos ensues. This trouble occurs because the practice of healing is undertaken via the ego's apparent attempt to escape suffering. Attempting healing out of 'neediness' or other negative emotions creates a counter force which leads to self sabotage and lack of progress. The ego says it wants to heal and change but careful examination of its underlying dynamics reveals that this is impossible. The mind cannot change or transform anything, though it believes that it can. Its only true aim is to survive and perpetuate its programming, which is the very antithesis of the transformation we're after. In our attempt to escape suffering, we create more of it. Yang tries to create the effects of yin through feats of exhausting and destructive effort. This is why it's important to surrender and release our emotions and attachments on subjects that we wish to heal so that yang may give way to yin. This is experienced as the release of tightness, increased energy and softness, being okay with the outcomes, forgiveness, allowing ourselves to breathe. For as long as we are clenched tightly to our problems, we are resisting our own transformation. The illusion of the ego is that it thinks it can do the healing, and that healing needs to occur in the first place. The entirety of our Unconscious psyche (Yin!) is imprinted in the energetic system and we refer to it as blockages. And when we assume we are blocked, we assume we need healing and that then we will return to balance. In practice, when the unconscious is integrated (kundalini as manifestation of yang flowing in its receiving of yin) it is not just a return to normalcy, but the birth of something far greater. This union is the birther of worlds. The process is more akin to the metamorphosis of a butterfly, rather than of the closing of a wound. Can this be said to be healing? Not hardly! The glamour of certain healing practices is that it allows our ego's to juice our narratives and problems. The key to circumventing the tricks of monkey mind is to surrender our attachments and emotions to god/the universe/consciousness. The ego repulses at the idea of surrender because it thinks it means being passive, not doing anything, resignation, not having things change. In actuality, surrendering and releasing our attachments and emotions is ideally a very proactive mechanism. It doesn't even mean that we don't pursue healing modalities, only that it is done with more effortlessness, trust and enjoyment as a result of courage and willingness to let go of our grief, guilt, desire for change, and other emotions on the subject. Paradoxically when we release our wanting things to be different is when things really start to change. I can attest to this. ok, glad I wrote that because it's been bouncing around in my brain

@Sidi 1. Make a real commitment to yourself to go straight after school whether you have your licence, catch a bus or walk there (good cardio) etc it will be a great outlet from school and you can make a real life transformation in the next few weeks. 2. A good workout routine to follow is Monday: Chest/Triceps, Tuesday: Back/Biceps, Wednesday: Legs/Abs, Thurday: Shouders, Friday: Biceps/Triceps Weekend: Rest. 3. Get a nutrition app such as MyFitnessPal or Lifesum where you can track what you eat to get leaner and set goals accordingly. All the best consistency is the most important thing when it comes to health and fitness.

Yes, a way to live can definitely follow from enlightenment(s). That is essentially the whole book i'm writing is about. (except not -- it's actually a book about nothing) It is true that the solution is to follow your intuition. The hard part is in separating intuition from egoic confusion, however. Here's an excerpt from the section called Neo-Advaitan Confusion and another section on Core Values. ----- “If you plan on being anything less than you are capable of being, you will probably be unhappy all the days of your life.” – Abraham Maslow Some people think that connecting to Pure Being means literally doing nothing – especially nothing to help themselves. Maybe they listened to Eckhert Tolle’s Power of Now. Or maybe they want to “go with the flow,” because they saw it on a Bruce Lee poster and think that trying to do anything is a problem. Do not confuse the fact that you already are the truth with meaning that there’s nothing to do and nowhere to go. That is bullshit. I have never, ever met or heard of anyone who does absolutely nothing 100% of the time (that’s not dead or a vegetable.) Enlightened masters still do stuff: · Jesus sacrificed himself for his own reasons · Peter Ralston writes, teaches, and Kicks people in the face for his own reasons · Siddhartha Guatama talked to people about their problems for his own reasons it's not like they said "oh I'm enlightened now, fuck it there's nothing to do." Indeed, they're enlightenment specifically helped them take action. (Although one must be careful to separate enlightenment from transformation!) What we conventionally think of as us is actually a pattern of behaviors and stories exhibited by a seemingly constrained the universe itself. The ‘real’ us doesn’t even exist in the spacetime continuum. What’s important about that fact is that no one behavioral pattern is you because all behavioral patterns exist within spacetime. So, there’s no reason to identify with any one behavioral patterns. If you smoke, then no, it’s not Absolutely True that “you are smoker”– so, you don’t have to judge yourself so harshly for smoking and you don’t have to accept it as capital-T True that you will always “be” a smoker “no matter what.” Moreover, if you can correctly identify your unhelpful patterns, you can begin to change them to more helpful ones. Wakeful people have set strong behavioral systems in their life to help them follow their core values. As a result, they access pure being with less and less effort until it approaches becomes zero mental effort. So yes – there’s nothing we “have to” do, in a sense the only thing you have to “be” is yourself. But no – there’s plenty of work left; the life you’ve been living up to now is nowhere close to what your actual self is about. And even more no - there are internal pulls toward higher values that still pull one toward living up to their greatest potential. Unless you wake up every morning and have absolutely no struggle whatsoever to live your deepest values in-and-of-themselves every single moment of every single day to such an extent that you literally don’t care if you die at any moment because life is that good, then no, you’re not there yet. It’s easy for people to run around claiming that they’re enlightened just because they “understand” that there is no self. Its not like we can hop into their mind to see if they're lying. But look at what they do. Look at what they concern themselves about behaviorally. Look at what they stand for. Look at how they handle conflict. In particular, ask if that their actions connect to their deepest, most transcendent values 24/7 365. If not, then sucks-to-suck: they're probably not nearly as ‘enlightened’ as you might think. Enlightenment does not equal transformation, but it most certainly will help. ---- The Main Point: Balance theory with practice. Someone who truly ‘gets it’ will access pure being as much as possible. Their actions will reflect that fact, as they constantly live their core values for they'll realize that there's not much else to do anyway. ---- What are the cores value? The core values serve as internal "stars" for navigation. Or to put it another way, if you look deeply enough, the core values will feel like magnets that pull you in the appropriate direction. In truth, the core values do not "exist" in the "real" world. They are inexplicable and irreducible, only understandable from pure intuition. But who cares if they're "real"? Life is a game and the fun is in trying. You will never embody any core value perfectly, but the pursuit of our core values automatically helps us transcend life's distractions and remove our conditions-for-happiness. Thus, the main byproduct of our core values is Pure Being and Pure Happiness. It’s unnecessary to reinvent the wheel when it comes to figuring out what’s valuable. You are human and the core values are common to all humans, so you can perfectly well look at other humans to figure out your own core values. The following list comes from my own personal insights as well as research from Abraham Maslow, who called them Being Values. If you don’t believe me, good! I don’t want you to believe anything I say – I want you to investigate each idea for yourself. It’s through the investigation that you will help yourself aim at each value with laser focus. A person in Pure Being cognition will a life in accordance to the following core values: 1. 100% responsibility ---- “When we become responsible for our own values, we no longer have to struggle to make the world conform to our needs, rather we can adapt our own values to fit the circumstances that confront us in the world.” – William James “There is nothing outside of yourself that can ever enable you to get better, stronger, richer, quicker, or smarter. Everything is within. Everything exists. Seek nothing outside of yourself.” ― Miyamoto Musashi, The Book of Five Rings “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” ― Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning --- Taking 100% responsibility for everything that happens to you in life is the cornerstone of all personal development. It’s the well-spring for self-sufficiency and self-efficacy. No matter what happens, you always have a choice in how to respond. You have a response – ability. Specifically, taking responsibility means choosing to forego distractions in favor of solutions and figuring out how to transcend your conditions for happiness. Other words: autonomy; independence; not-needing-other-than-itself-in-order-to-be-itself; self-determining; environment-transcendence; separateness; living by its own laws 2. Truth, Wisdom, Curiosity, and Exploration ---- “The pursuit of truth and beauty is a sphere of activity in which we are permitted to remain children all our lives.” – Albert Einstein, ---- We all have an inner pull to find out what’s true: a willingness to see what lies in the unknown, an openness to insight and the discipline to put insight to use. Indeed, the pursuit of truth is by far the most powerful journey a human can take. To go on this journey, take it as a given that you’re at least partially wrong about life and work to make yourself less wrong. Keep exploring until you finish. Then, when you think you’re finished, take it as a sign that you have gone the wrong way, for you’re never finished. Other words: honesty; reality; nakedness; simplicity; richness; oughtness; beauty; pure, clean and unadulterated; completeness; essentiality 3. Aliveness, Richness, Beauty --- “Never lose an opportunity of seeing anything beautiful, for beauty is God's handwriting.”-- Ralph Waldo Emerson --- We are each pulled toward having complete experiences of the world. We want to not feel “used to” the “mundane” objects of reality. We want to look into our lover’s eyes for the ten-thousandth-time the way we did for the first time. We want to find, observe, and appreciate beauty. We want to look in awe at what’s possible for the world of color, smell, and taste. And we have a pull to feel fully functional – connected to both our animal intellect and human intellect. I think this is the magic behind movies – they suck you into the experience completely so that there is no thought – only observance. I also think this is the reason some people do things like Cocaine – they want to feel the buzz of total pure sensory experience. The final note is that part of pursuing aliveness, richness, and beauty is the motivation to go out to nature. Wakeful people love going to nature. Other words: process; non-deadness; spontaneity; self-regulation; full-functioning; differentiation, complexity; intricacy; rightness; form; aliveness; simplicity; richness; wholeness; perfection; completion; uniqueness; 4. Simplicity, Space, Orderliness, Elegance ---- “In character, in manner, in style, in all things, the supreme excellence is simplicity.” -- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow --- Life is simple, but we insist in making it complicated. Simplicity in this case refers to taking out the unnecessary junk from out lives – our schedules, our rooms, and our psyches. Space refers to space in our schedule to remain flexible. It also means having time to breathe and relax. Keeping things orderly, without becoming neurotic about it, contributes to a person’s mental health and well-being. A clean room is a clean mind. And in mathematics, a theorem exhibits elegance if it is surprisingly simple yet effective and constructive; similarly, a computer program or algorithm is elegant if it uses a small amount of code to great effect. Similarly, some of the greatest personal wisdom has elegance to it. Finding elegance in your understanding is a sign of growth. Embodying elegance in our lives is the ultimate form of mastery. Other words: honesty; nakedness; essentiality; abstract, essential, skeletal structure; minimalism 5. Authenticity – Vulnerability - Worthiness --- “The closer you stay to emotional authenticity and people, character authenticity, the less you can go wrong. That's how I feel now, no matter what you're doing.” - David O. Russell --- Authenticity is all about being real. Genuine, not an imitation. It means cultivating the courage to be imperfect, to set boundaries, and to allow ourselves to be vulnerable; It means exercising the compassion that comes from knowing that we are all made of strength and struggle; And it means nurturing the connection and sense of belonging that can only happen when we believe that we are enough. Emotional richness comes from authenticity and vulnerability, for we have to allow ourselves to open up to whatever may come. Other words: realness; openness; genuineness; emotional availability; 6. Benevolence, Justice, and Empathy --- “The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson --- We want our work and our lives to raise the lives of our brethren. We all want to know we help. We don’t even care if others know, we just want to know that we do. Justice is about keeping the world in karmic balance. It goes beyond tit for tat. It also goes beyond doing unto others what you’d like to have done to you. Justice is ultimately about creating a better world through fairness. Empathy has four key elements o To be able to see the world as others see it. o To be nonjudgmental o To understand another person’s feelings o To communicate your understanding of that person’s feelings Remember: the natural, happy state of the human is a giving one. Other words: fairness; orderliness; lawfulness; "oughtness; rightness; desirability; oughtness; honesty; goodness 7. Wholeness – Direct Connection - Integration – Relative Perspective --- “You and I are all as much continuous with the physical universe as a wave is continuous with the ocean.” – Alan Watts --- The truth is that we are not separate from the universe, we are the universe. Our greatest suffering comes from forgetting this fact. Wholeness refers to making a direct connection to universal oneness. We want to feel connected to our fellow man, our fellow woman, our pets, the trees, and the stars themselves. Achieving this connection simply feels better than anything else. It is the purest form of pure being. This is why we value sex so much. For most people, sex is the closest they will ever come to the ultimate connection. Integration means alignment of mind, body, and spirit. It also means taking imbalanced parts of our psyche and re-balancing them. Black and white thinking, or dichotomy thinking, lies at the root of many struggles. The universe is filled with paradoxes, and we want to become comfortable with those paradoxes. 8. Mastery -> excellence, effortlessness, and challenge ---- “A man cannot understand the art he is studying if he only looks for the end result without taking the time to delve deeply into the reasoning of the study.” ― Miyamoto Musashi --- We want to put forward work that we can genuinely feel proud of. We want to make music with just the right rhythm. We want our paintings to have just the right amount of color. And we want to enjoy the process of creating that work. We don’t want to strain to take the steps in the right direction. We want our work to flow out of us like nothing. Then again, we also want challenge. We don’t want to feel bored. We want to constantly grow our skills and grow our abilities. If we set a world record, fine – what’s more important is to set a personal record. Finally, we want to finish. We want to actually complete things instead of leaving them hanging. No one likes to quit if they know they can finish. To quote Robert Greene, “Think of it this way: There are two kinds of failure. The first comes from never trying out your ideas because you are afraid, or because you are waiting for the perfect time. This kind of failure you can never learn from, and such timidity will destroy you.” “The second kind comes from a bold and venturesome spirit. If you fail in this way, the hit that you take to your reputation is greatly outweighed by what you learn. Repeated failure will toughen your spirit and show you with absolute clarity how things must be done.” Other words: ease; lack of strain, striving or difficulty; grace; perfect, beautiful functioning; necessity; just-right-ness; just-so-ness; inevitability; suitability; justice; completeness; "oughtness" 9. Dispassion, Equanimity, and Nonneediness --- “What humans require in our ascent is purpose and realism. Purpose, you could say, is like passion with boundaries. Realism is detachment and perspective.” – Ryan Holiday --- We want mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper, especially in difficult situations. We pursue coolness in our society as a false way of approaching this peace. We want the ability to let the pain flow through our bodies and purpose flow through our actions. We want to not need anything. We actually want to give up the plucky level of passion shown by amateurs and take up the stoic dispassion of professionals. We don’t want our hearts dragged this way and that by the random external forces. To quote Ryan Holiday, “passion typically masks a weakness. Its breathlessness and impetuousness and franticness are poor substitutes for discipline, for mastery, for strength and purpose and perseverance. You need to be able to spot this in others and in yourself, because while the origins of passion may be earnest and good, its effects are comical and then monstrous.” Put simply, we want emotional discipline. Other words: composure, calm, level-headedness, self-possession, coolheadedness, presence of mind; serenity, tranquility, phlegm, imperturbability, equilibrium; poise, assurance, self-confidence, aplomb, sangfroid, nerve 10. Telos -> purpose, progress, completion --- “He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.” -- Friedrich Nietzsche “Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.” ― Viktor E. Frankl --- We want transcendent meaning without having to delude ourselves. We want the ups and downs of our days to add up to something bigger. We want to have a story that counts. We want to have some action, some drama, some romance, and some comedy in our lives. We want to have goals to aim for, a path to walk, and feedback for that path. Ultimately, we want a vocation – a calling, summons, or strong inclination to a particular state or course of action with an almost religious zeal. We don’t want to just work for work’s sake: we want work to become part of us in the best of ways. Other words: necessity; just-right-ness; just-so-ness; inevitability; suitability; justice; completeness; "oughtness"; ending; finality; justice; "it's finished"; fulfillment; finis and telos; destiny; fate; feedback; meaning 11. Playfulness-Creativity-Uniqueness ---- “The opposite of play is not work — it’s depression.” - Brian Sutton-Smith ---- Play is something done for its own sake. It’s voluntary, it’s pleasurable, it offers a sense of engagement, it takes you out of time, and the act itself is more important than the outcome. The fact is that none of us must take life so seriously. I don’t care if you’re the president of a major country, an open-heart surgeon, or a kindergartener: Play is part of the healthy human experience. Period. Play doesn’t just give us mental rest, it also grows our level of genius and self-efficacy. This is why many mammals play – it the most fertile ground for practice and mastery. It is through play that the lion cub becomes an elite hunter. Similarly, it is through play that the apprentice becomes an elite master. One form of play is creativity. Specifically, creativity means playing with in the unknown as you bring skills or ideas together in a novel manner. We all have a pull toward creativity, but shame may cover up that influence. Do not let this happen to you – it would mean giving up your godly power. Let it be known that you are god essentially because you have (better yet are) the power of imagination. There is nothing else in the known universe that has the ability to pull things from imagination other than the universe itself. The universe needs you to create and express your unique perspective. Other words: fun; joy; amusement; gaiety; humor; exuberance; effortlessness; idiosyncrasy; individuality; non-comparability; novelty 12. Unconditional Happiness --- “Unconditional happiness is the highest technique.” – Michael Singer --- It’s simple: if you value your true self, then you must value unconditional happiness. Why? Our true nature is unconditional happiness. The unconditional happiness that is our true nature is always there, no matter whether good or bad things are happening - it's the essence of what and who we are. We are universal observers and we love everything we observe! This happiness has no reason for it. It simply is. Everything else is just dress up or an excuse to allow ourselves to feel what’s already been there. Denying the possibility of unconditional happiness is a sign of delusion; a sign of denial of reality; a sign that you're playing yourself. As such, let it be known that we are all deluded at times. And that is why we must keep reminding ourselves of unconditional happiness as a virtue. Other words: self-transcendence; nirvana; heaven; pure being; pure joy 13. Death ---- “Death never takes a wise man by surprise; he is always ready to go.” – Jean de la Fontaine ---- This is about as counterintuitive as humanly possible – I mean, our entire intuition is to go move away from death, is it not? Don’t think that valuing death means literally putting your life at risk 24/7 a lå the flying Wallandas or Travis Pastrana. Although, if that’s how you want to live, more power to you. Instead, valuing death more is about recognizing that the option to not-live is always near and that death gives life some much needed urgency. It’s about being thankful for the chance to be alive and the chance to take everything in through the wonderful window of perception that is you. It’s also about coming to terms with your legacy and not living with regret. Ultimately, valuing death means becoming friends with the all-consuming Nothingness that permeates the universe. Are you unsure of what core values you value the most? Death will help you get that straightened out real quick – just think about what you’d like to do if today was your last day, this year was your last year, or the next five years are the last chance you’d have with your parents. Here are the main points to consider about death: Death is inevitable Everyone has to die; your lifespan is decreasing continuously; the amount of time you have for spiritual practice is small The uncertainty of the time of death human life-expectancy is uncertain; there are many causes of death; the human body is very fragile The fact that only spiritual practice can help you at the time of death your loved ones cannot help; your possessions and enjoyments cannot help; your own body cannot help Other words: making peace, pre-mortem, life-as-a-preparation, becoming friends with nothingness, knowing that this too shall pass --- The Main Point: Live a life of Responsibility, Truth, Freshness, Simplicity, Benevolance, Vulnerability, Wholeness, Master, Telos, Equanimity, Playfulness, Unconditional Happiness, and the embrace of death – watch your happiness skyrocket, for free. ---- One last point about the core values: do not confuse them with morals. They are simply what a person in the healthiest mental state will naturally pursue. They're what happens when you give a person time, room, space, energy, and time to do whatever they'd like however they'd like for as long as they'd like. Again, they're called core values because you feel them at your core and they're nice to live up to in-and-of-themselves.

Cause of Suffering WE VERY OFTEN FEEL THAT WE CREATE OUR OWN SUFFERINGS. IN SPITE OF THIS, WHY DO WE CONTINUE CREATING THEM? AND WHEN AND HOW DOES ONE STOP CREATING ONE'S OWN SUFFERING? The first thing, and very basic to be understood, is that whenever you say WE VERY OFTEN FEEL THAT WE CREATE OUR OWN SUFFERING, this is not the case. You never really feel that you are the creator of your own suffering. You may think so, because you have been taught so; because for centuries and centuries teachers have been teaching that you are the creator of your own suffering and no one else is responsible. You have heard these things, you have read these things. They have become your blood and bone, they have become your unconscious conditionings, so sometimes you repeat like a parrot WE CREATE OUR OWN SUFFERING. But this is not your feeling, this is not your realization, because if you realize it, then the other thing is impossible. Then you cannot say, IN SPITE OF THIS, WHY DO WE CONTINUE CREATING IT? If you really feel, and if it is your own feeling that you are the creator of your own suffering, any moment you can stop -- unless you want to create it, unless you enjoy it, unless you are a masochist. Then everything is okay, then there is no question. If you say, `I enjoy my suffering,' then it is okay; you can go on creating it. But if you say, `I suffer and I want to go beyond it. I want to stop it completely -- and I understand that I am the creator,' then you are wrong. You don't understand it. Socrates is reported to have said that knowledge is virtue. And there has been a long discussion for these two thousand years over whether Socrates is right or wrong -- knowledge is virtue. Socrates says that once you know something, you cannot do contrary to it. If you know that anger is suffering, you cannot be angry. This is what Socrates means -- knowledge is virtue. You cannot say, `I know anger is bad; still I move in it. What to do about it now?' Socrates says that the first thing is wrong. You don't know that anger is bad; that's why you go on moving in it. If you know, you cannot move in it. How can you move against your own knowledge? I know that if I put my hand in the fire it is going to be painful. If I know, I cannot put my hand in. But if somebody else has told me, if I have heard through the tradition, if I have read in the scriptures that fire burns, and I have not known fire, and I have not known any similar experience, only then can I put my hand into fire -- and that too only once. Can you conceive it? That you have put your hand into fire and you have been burned and you have suffered, and again you go and ask, `I know that fire burns, but in spite of it I go on putting my hand into the fire. What to do about it?' Who will believe that you know? And what type of knowledge is this? If your own experience of suffering and burning cannot stop you, nothing is going to stop you. Now there is no possibility, because the last possibility has been missed. But no one can miss it; that is impossible. Socrates is right, and all those who have know, they will agree with Socrates -- that agreement has a very deep point in it. Once you know.... But remember -- the knowledge must be yours. A borrowed knowledge won't do; borrowed knowledge is useless. Unless it is your own experience, it is not going to change you. Others' experiences are of no help. You have heard that you are the creator of your own suffering, but this is just in the mind. It has not entered your being, it is not your own knowledge. So when you are discussing, you can discuss about it cerebrally, but when the actual phenomenon happens, you will forget, and you will behave in the way you know, not in the way others know. When you are at ease, cool, collected, silently discussing anger, you can say it is poison, it is a disease, evil. But when someone makes you angry then a complete change occurs. Not it is not an intellectual discussion, now you are involved. And the moment you are involved, you become angry. Later on again, retrospectively, when you again get cool, the memory will come back, your mind will again start functioning, and you will say, `That was wrong. It was not good of me to do that. I know anger is wrong.' Who is this `I'? -- just intellect, just the superficial mind. You don't know -- because when someone pushes you into anger, you throw this mind away. It is useful as far as discussion is concerned, but when a real situation arises, only the real knowledge will help. When there is no situation, you can go on. Even in a discussion the real situation can arise. The other can go on contradicting you so much that you become angry and then you will forget. Real knowledge means that which has happened to you. You have not heard about it, not read about it, you have not collected information about it -- it is your own experience. And then there is no question, because after that you cannot go against it. Not that you will have to make an effort not to go against it; simply you cannot go against it. How can I? When I know this is a wall and I want to go out of this room, how can I try to pass through the wall? I know this is a wall, so I will search for the door. Only a blink man will try to go out through the wall. I have got eyes. I see what is a wall and what is a door. But if I try to enter the wall and tell you, `I know very well where the door is, and I know this to be a wall, but in spite of this, how can I stop myself from trying to enter the wall?' then that means that as far as I am concerned that door looks false. Others have told me that it is the door, but as far as I am concerned, I know that door is false. And others have told me that this is a wall, but as far as I see, I see the door here in this wall, and that is why I try. In this situation you have to make a clearcut distinction between what you know and what you have gathered as knowledge. Don't rely on information. From the greatest source -- even if you collect from the greatest source -- information is information. Even if a Buddha says it to you, it is not your own, and it is not going to help you in any way. But you can remain thinking that it is your knowledge, and this misunderstanding will waste your energy, time and life. The basic thing is not to ask what to do so that suffering is not created. The basic thing is to know that you are the creator of your suffering. Next time whenever a real situation arises and you are in suffering, remember to find out whether you are the cause of it. And if you can find out that you are the cause of it, the suffering will disappear, and the same suffering will not appear again -- impossible. But don't deceive yourself. You can -- that's why I say it. When you are suffering you can say, `Yes, I know I have created this suffering,' but deep down you know that someone else has created it. Your wife has created it, your husband has created it, someone else has created it, and this is simply a consolation because you cannot do anything. You console yourself: `No one has created it, I have created it myself, and by and by I will stop it.' But knowledge is instant transformation; there is no `by and by.' If you understand that you have created it, it will drop immediately. And it is not going to come up again. If it comes again, it means the understanding has not gone deep. So there is no need to find out what to do, and how to stop. The only need is to go deep and to find out who is really the cause of it. If others are the cause then it cannot be stopped, because you cannot change the whole world. If you are the cause, only then can it be stopped. That's why I insist that only religion can lead humanity towards non-suffering. Nothing else can lead, because everyone else believes that the suffering is caused by others; only religion says that suffering is caused by you. So religion makes you the master of your destiny. You are the cause of your suffering, hence you can be the cause of your bliss. - Osho - The Book of Secrets, discourses on Vigyan Bhairav Tantra

@hinawashi The Argo is still the Argo The ship is only separated by our perceptions. I mean, yeah, the original components have changed, but, consider the boundaries we create in an ultimately unified universe, there's only a boundary there because we created it. Once the ship started to restore it's "original" or "warn out" pieces that's when we decided (or created the boundary) that it was no longer the ship, and we forgot that the entire universe is a unity. The new pieces are the old pieces. they were never separate from each other. So the ship still remains as it's original identity just newer and more robust From this perspective you could say that the transformation was already there or already occurring or already occurred. It just depends on how you look at it, and whatever you decide on is mostly likely "where" or "when" it will be.

So the dynamic journal is the way to go. Sounds like a good plan. Life is indeed like living on the seven seas like a pirate. Grab your eyepatch, pegleg, musket and cutlass, and loot and plunder your way up from deckswabber to captain. Ever hear about the Argo paradox? When Jason first set sail with his band of swashbucklers, he built the Argo from new materials but as he sailed from port to port part of the ship got old and was replaced until all parts were eventually replaced with new parts. So some peoples argue that the Argo at the end isn't the real Argo anymore but an entirely different ship altogether. If that's true, then when did the Argo become a different ship? Is it when the first piece is replaced or when the last piece is replaced, or some halfway point in the middle? Or is it possible that no matter how many pieces were replaced, the Argo is still the Argo? It's the same problem with life. We all know that we've transformed when we look back at our past lives, but we cannot define the precise moment in time when the transformation took place.