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Because true understanding is born out of Being, not a map or a theory. A description without first hand experience is worthless What are you gonna do with the description? Believe in it and become a religious nutcase? Oneness, Non-Duality, God, Infinity, Love, Nothingness, You, Existence... All these are descriptions. Without direct experience they will remain just words and ideas

Hello there. This is my first post on here. I'm currently having a lot of doubts about existence. One of them is about nothingness and how the existence of nothingness is just a paradox (I also think that this is the most elemental paradox in the universe). I've been watching many times this Gura's video "why there is something rather than nothing" to understand a little bit more about the existence of everything. In some part of the video he says something like "what could prevent nothing to turn into something?... Nothing". Yes, I think I understand what does he mean but my question is: if there's nothingness, what could push nothing to turn into something? I mean, if there is absolute nothing (but nothingness) what would decide or have the initiative to turn nothing into something? Even more. If nothing can prevent nothing to turn into something, then. Do all the infinite possibilities of universes occur in nothingness? It would mean that all the infinite possible universes are occurring in this precise moment. am I right? I know this journey of self development takes years and probably for you this is a very basic question but in my journey I am very stuck with this issue. Please help me. Thanks a lot

I want you to think about this scene from Hawkeye series. It gives you the perspective of people in the blip. (If the link doesn’t work, it is the scene from Hawkeye from the point of view of Yelena waking up from the blip). https://youtu.be/7hYg0w9ZINU A lot of people think that when they die, they will be put in a dark room of nothingness. What you really find is something much more radical. It is just like going to sleep. When you go to sleep and wake up, it is as if you never slept. In your experience, you lay down and wake up. When you wake up, you have thoughts about your sleep that we call dreams. Dan Dennett has a theory on dreaming in which we do not dream while we sleep, but rather, we invent it as we wake up. The same is with your ideas of the past and with the idea of death. It is all a story. When you die, you will have the same experience as being born. Compared to the Universe, going to sleep and waking up at 8 hours later we assume is the same as the Universe creating the Big Bang 8 billion years ago. 8 hours and 8 billions years are all the same in the eye of the universe. They are a “blip.” Look at the spirituality of the Marvel-verse. It is really profound. What is more profound is that it is our universe creating more and more of itself. I had a similar experience to Yelena while I was under anesthesia. It was as if I never fell asleep or took anesthesia. It was as if I reinvented everything. I could remember being nothingness and slowly coming back into ego/form. It was crazy. The weird thing was is that it’s as if no time passed at all. That’s cause there is no time I guess that’s why death is an illusion because Eternity can never die. Very mind blowing stuff. What are your thoughts?

I feel like I am trapped in my own dream and like this dream has its own reality which I cannot run away from. Feeling like I am trapped in one dream and like I cannot, and should not, run away from this dream. Feeling like reality is solid and cannot be transcended. Because where will those other realities go? They have nowhere else to go? And they should not go? If reality is infinite, isn't reality just infinite? Where are the dreams that you had before now? Where are those dreams now? Where are those worlds? What happens to the dreams you wake up from? Continuing to exist on their own? Continuing in nothingness? Zero point field, huh?

December 18th 2021 LSD Trip 003 Beforehand I familiarized myself with several of Leo's teachings. Probably more than I name here: What is Consciousness? What is Actuality? What is Perception? What is Intelligence? What is Will? What Love? What is Death? Understanding Bias Guided exercise for realizing you are God? What is Fear? What is Reality? Integrating the lessons from building your existential vocabulary. Plus I have watched most of Leo's videos at least once. So I supposedly plugged around 75-80mcg And then supposedly took around 20mcg sublingually. (In total, only about 100mcg entered my body max.) So, if, theoretically, plugged doubles the dose, then I'm not at 75-100mcg But more like 150-200mcg >I totally forgot to set an classical focused intention. An intention such as: Contemplating what is consciousness. I just intuitively wanted to connect all my knowledge and go for ego death. I also wanted to see how far I could go into enlightenment work on just LSD, before pulling out the big guns of 5meo. In my mind, I figured that just a "simple ego death" was holding me back, and in theory that made sense, but what I am coming to learn is that the LEVEL of ego death required was more than just a simple fear wipe of questioning things like death. I really believe, there are different degrees of ego death. It's a spectrum. This also helps with understanding the idea of the degrees of awakening. Just what we call "ego death" or what we call "awakening" are just benchmarks into how deep your ego death/awakening is. >The intention I did have was a recipe for a rough trip, because in my mind I knew I was going to rub up against fear, so it was just a self fulfilling prophecy. >It came on so fast, so much faster than I was ready for. It freaked me out. Plus, I totally forgot what dose range I was in if plugging indeed doubled it. So I was thrown into a world of fear right away. It was super unepic. If I wasn't under the intention of consciousness work, then this hell I was about to enter would be demonized. But rather I later used my fear to understand what was going on as much as I could stomach. >At about 10 minutes in I already started to feel the effects kicking in. Visuals at 20 minutes Things are already moving at 24min All my plans are gone Like I forgot to set an intention. Growth happens a lot faster than you anticipate it. >The LSD came on so fast and so hard that it was mega anxiety inducing, like I felt I needed to explode! I NEEDED to die (ego death). That would be my only mercy. Which makes me ask exactly What an ego death is. Because I can cry and let go into the fear, and then the fear would be gone, but I know I could let go of my notion of physical perceived reality itself, and I would call that an even deeper ego death, a more true ego death I would say, where you actually let go of the notion that your body exists to begin with. >All the insights were interconnecting so much faster than I could stomach and handle. Like holy fuck this work is becoming REAL. >At one point while being super scared on the rough come-up, I think, for a brief moment, I became conscious of how I was imagining my skull. Later this fed deeper into my understanding in which how reality is held together with emotional glue. Your attachment is deeply intertwined with "physical" reality itself, which is WHY it's so goddamn terrifying to wipe away all these illusions and hallucinations that you as God has created for yourself. >A psychedelic, fundamentally, wipes away your imaginations holding reality together. Courage is walking while your feet are on fire. >When I wrote this I was mega scared, shit was fucked as fuck. I was walking into other rooms, changing my clothes, listening to different music, walking outside, walking inside, trying to change the environment, I was spiraling down more and more. I quickly learned that this was a loosing battle, and I had either the choice suffer, or go straight towards what I was fearing and kill my ego. My ONLY comfort was listening to Leo with his video: Guided Exercise for Realizing You are God. Trying desperately to ground myself by looking at my hand. Needless to say I may have taken too much. It was intense getting acclimatized to the new body load/higher vibration/whatever. LSD spirals you into the story you tell yourself. >Eventually I reached a point and I said, "I GIVE UP! I LET IT GO I LET IT GO, I LET IT GO! I LET IT ALL GO! >Then that eventually turned into crying and that was the BEST thing that happened on the trip. It felt AMAZING! Hooting and hollering, sitting on my kitchen floor. WAAAH! WAAAH! I wanted to cry louder but I was worried that the neighbours would hear and come and knock on my door. >My trip completely turned inside out from fear to bliss and calm. It was silent. I'm crying and crying I feels so good to cry At this point after the good cry, it was 2 hours and 30 minutes >I had my fear wiped away at this point. So it was easier to contemplate the tougher topics. I'm ready. What is death? I want to be able to look at my hand and then look at an object and not be able to tell the difference. >#Goals. Fear is the difference between what "should" be and what IS. Your stories, your attachments to what reality should be And what is. What is, is. I told a story to myself that the trip SHOULD come up X Fast, then it came faster, then I got scared. >The comeup was waaayyy too fast, super unexpected. Fear is feeling more of yourself. >You're just uncomfortable with feeling the parts of yourself that you fear. I was experiencing fear Then eventually I just let it all go because it drove me to tears, the pain. Then I was great. Then I'm coming down, and fear is setting in again. >I feel like I shed the fear that the ego created for me, and then the ego was clamping back down on me with more fear. The ego is encapsulated in a nest of fears to put it in a context. >Fears is what locks you into your paradigm. Death is the breaking apart of imagined boundaries. And there are emotions keeping them in place. Emotions are what reinforce the boundaries of reality. >I now see the role emotional mastery plays in awakening work. I need to read the book: Becoming Infinite. I'm thinking about how I need to shake loose the boundary between my emotions going in and out of death. In and out of the emotionally gated imagined boundaries. Like coming back down to earth so we speak, coming back down to earth is a process of fear. I think this is what can be described as the ego "clamping down" on you. That "clamping" mechanism is fears sneaking their way back into reality. And it's to FEEL deeply into the fear to get out of that clamping process. When talking about manifestation, manifesting a new reality, you must first lose your mind enough in order to consider the new possibility for a new reality to be created, then once that mind is open enough then you can actually make that the case. I'm starting to understand how rough it is to awaken. Consciousness work is some real manly shit. I would argue that it is more important to pay attention to the come up and the come down then the actual trip itself. Because it is in between you and the trip is where you want feel that very deeply to merge it with your actual reality. And in that merge is full of fear, is full of discomfort, is uncomfortable, makes you feel Fully Alive, makes you feel going insane, makes you scared, makes you psychotic. I understand why Leo says plugging is better with the slower come-up because you are able to understand what is happening to you. How to Merge with Enlightenment. Pay attention to that nothingness. Patiently keep yourself there as long as you can. Merge with it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I am imagining a reality I have to figure out in order to manipulate. Like I am imagining the boundaries between me and greater knowledge. I'm imagining a "physical" world that I have to "do science" in. I understand the idea of a spiritual emergency. You need to take it to the end for that release. I understand how you can scare yourself off of psychedelics for awhile, when to deconstruct too much, too fast for you to handle. Too fast for you to accept and come to terms with. Learning to draw is LITERALLY learning how to create illusion. Selling something of "value" is LITERALLY selling an illusion. Simply because everything in reality is illusory! Psychedelics just shake boundaries loose, and creates new connections. What is an ego death? What is a "ego death"? What's the difference between letting go of the fear of death, and dying? What's the difference between letting go of the fear of death, and letting go of the idea that your body exists? "Ego death" appears to be a spectrum. Like there are many facets of reality that you can deconstruct that will also kill parts of your perceived self. I have created an understanding between Fear and Funny Fear is merging with an idea that you're close minded with. Merging your consciousness with a unpleasant idea. You cry when you merge with it. Funny its merging with an idea that you're open minded with. Merging your consciousness with a pleasant idea. You laugh when you merge with it. They're both just emotions to express the difference between merging with parts of yourself. >I'm starting to understand the possibility of being able to look at reality as imagination manifested as "matter". I had a serious curiosity to ask about death to the people around me, and I wanted to feel it deeply. And when I did, I cried and then felt love. I MERGED with it. 12 hours in, still tripping, still having visuals. >I think for me, LSD lasts at least 16+ hours, no matter the ROA. I am really understanding the value of curiosity in this work. If you're not willing to experience fear, you have no fucking chance of getting enlightened. Post Trip I woke up and I am stepping into a new sensitive energy body of myself. I feel like I've expanded a part of my consciousness into new areas that I was previously too scared to entertain. My mind is open enough to much more comfortably visualize the pain and suffering that goes around physical death or loss of self. Like, for example, I can more comfortably imagine my dog's jaw being ripped off, and explore the feeling of the pain of loss, investigate my attachment to my dogs being okay. Or imagining what it would mean if I lost my left leg. Investigating that idea and the feelings and attachments that come with it. I can imagine what it would feel like to live with loosing the fingers from my hand. I have a deeper understanding with the correlation with death and merging with infinite love. I learned if I am having a bad trip, I just need to lean into the fear and go for an ego death, then the fear gets wiped away. I'm learning that my notions of ego is much more deeply interwoven with "physical" reality than I previously understood. To Do Study books on 5MeO. Questions How do you define ego death? How do you define ego? Thanks for reading!

As far as timelessness goes, there is an important aspect that must be considered here, which is that the present moment is not finite. Which is to say that there is no "slice", like "a frame" on a tape. There is no finite moment that could be seen as a limited, enclosed "piece" of a larger tape ("the rest of time"), so to speak. But it sure seems like that. We tend to think of "the present moment" as a frame of time, the duration of which we are not quite sure of, maybe 1 sec, maybe 100ms? Who knows. But this is an illusion. And we then think that within this frame of time ("the present moment"), the future flows in, turns into the present moment and then flows out again into the past. And that "the future" and "the past" are like a tape that, although it is now gone, is being stored somewhere, inaccessible to human beings - unless we invent "time travel", so that we can bring up whatever piece of tape we want. There is no "it" ("the present moment", as ordinarily conceived). To most people, it feels like they're inhabiting a static piece of time. It's rather like an immediate arising and passing away, "both" so "simultaneously", so utterly identical, that nothing is happening at all, and nothing is not happening. You are (the) Now. "Now" is not occurring within this world, the world is held within Now. And Now is Nothingness. Now is In-finity.

If I am asked to believe his teaching that one creates their own reality of having this power to externally effect things to happen in the manifest and we all do. Then I have to wonder why is he creating the earth's cataclysm? The content is obvious what it is. People are addicted to the imagination of telling the story, an apocalyptic tale of epic endings in all the different flavors of expression. It's not much different than what happens even here with the mind of telling stories. Here the story goes that the epic ending is absolute infinity. We are all god, nothingness is the only thing that exists and everything else is a dream. The end.

It is. Especialy if your mind has good synergy with it. Iv known people that go paranoid if they take to much, but for me its just pure bliss. But the same could be said for any drug. I could totaly loose myself in LSD if i would allow myself to. Its just as amazing in its own way as weed. The fading into nothingness and the slight erotic skin sensation being the only thing left you feel while experiencing nothing but strange fractal paterns is pure bliss aswell. I could do it every weekend and it would probebly never get old... But i wont ? ill suffer like the grumpy ass i am.

It's not that they are absolute things that exist in contrast to each other. Good and evil are literally summoned from nothingness through the purely biased filter of the perspective of the ego. Imagine being a Greek solider despoiling the city of Troy, raping multiple women, slaughtering opposing men, and throwing their children from the walls. Everything you are doing is good from your POV. It's great for you, you are serving your Gods, you are getting the spoils of war from your labor. They are heretics, and you are justice. Everyone does what they do exactly because they think it is good (for them). And anything in opposition to that is "evil". However there is a catch, because it seems there is some kind of what I'll call "lightness" baked into the universe. Where is one moves from ignorance > awareness there is a trend of things being harmed less and less. That doesn't invalidate good and evil being imaginary. What do you know, the universe is paradoxical!

Ok I think I get what you're saying now, if you started explaining it like this it would have been way easier I'd argue that it's deeper than God, more like an another aspect of the same thing, but maybe you're right and I wasn't deep enough, or maybe I'm deluding myself and never "experienced" the nothingness you're talking about.

Actually what you are doing is more or less confirming creatio ex nihilo. You are confirming that we as contingent beings can cease to exist, that we were created, so what did create us? You did not cause yourself, and everything around you can not cause itself either. No matter what you do, you end up at the uncaused cause, which brings the universe into being, that is God, you are not God and neither are I. You can experience God bla bla, but , I am talking about the power which brings creation into being from nothing in that sense, God can make himself known, but we dont know what he really is in himself, we can see his invisible power in the things he has made. We depend on God , not the other way around, since some Masters as you say can "have" cessation, but still come back to exactly the same place in their room for example, there is something outside of your subjective experience which holds you in place, same with deep sleep, you do not all of the sudden appear with a different body etc in a different country. This uncaused cause does not cease , it is Being itself, but you or me or anybody else is not Being at all in itself, we are full of potential and actuality, meaning we change, everything is moved, that is actuality and potential, we are contingent beings. But God is not caused by anything else, it is the fullness of being, as you previously have said, nothingness can not create since it is non existent, so we arrive at an eternal uncaused cause which brings time and everything else into existence and it holds creation in place, thats why you dont " cease to exist" forever in a cessation or deep sleep. In the sense of creation for God, it is to bring or cause things to be. God is God, you are you. Nothing comes from nothing, and creation is here right in front of you, the eternal cause does not cease. But creatures can. My parents existed prior to me, as did yours, as did God. He is on a completely different metaphysical level then you and me.

@Leo Gura One more thing to you. Where were you before you were born? You probably wasn’t infinity or god, and there was probably no experience or even a void. There was true nothingness. And you realize that without experiencing it. When you go deep enough as god, existence itself will go away. And when you come back, you’ll realize just like before you were born, nothingness is before and after everything. Nothing is outside infinity because outside infinity is nothingness. Be open to the possibility there is something deeper, or nothing for that matter. God has an off switch like everything else in nature. Nothing is apart of god, but nothing is also outside of god. Making ti the deepest realization. “Nothing is deeper than god.” Because the word nothing exists for a reason, to point away from everything. This is true enlightenment.

@gettoefl Exactly. That’s why I have started asking people what was before you were born if you can’t realize nothingness? I don’t remember there being infinity or god. Which means nothingness comes before and after everything. That’s why I get annoyed with people saying you’re stuck existing forever.

@Vincent S Glad I can help. Like I told judy you wasn’t infinity or god before you were born, meaning god can not exist. Nothingness comes before and after everything. Confusion isn’t good unless you want to keep people listening .

Most within? But, you are talking about the most without lol. Don't take that too seriously, I understand your point. Nothingness IS God. They are not separate or should I say Nothingness is the womb in which Infinite potential is birthed from. To be birthed from means to be a part of. I think the term God is more the issue here because when we pull back all the layers God is just a human concept. But, everything we are talking about is very difficult to put down in language. God is just a filler word for the sake of communication. Even if we separate the two God/Nothing and call Nothing the floor. Then Nothing is now the concept of God. For it is the thing that created everything for lack of a better term. Honestly most of what you are saying is fine besides the separation of these two things.

@Nos7algiK Well deep doesn’t mean above or more than. It just means the most within. And if god and all of existence itself can have a no self experience or go to sleep like we can, then that means nothingness is the most within. I’m not misunderstanding, if someone thinks nothingness is apart of god, then they don’t realize god and existence itself can go away. If we go away and we become god, then when god goes away it becomes nothingness. Making it the deepest.

@Nahm Eh you’re mixing it up with empty space. If god can stop existing, then nothingness obscures god. All of existence can have a no self experience. And I don’t mean that in the sense of blackness or emptiness is covering it up, I mean completely not exist. Like when you go to sleep you go away, yet you don’t experience anything and time skips. Well when you go deep enough you can do that as god, and you can’t experience it but come back and realize it happened. So, it’s the deepest realization.

End of beingness is the final cessation I think. There's utter nothingness. Then there's beingness/presence/consciousness. Then out of that consciousness creation happens. That's the explanation given by mooji. I hope I got it right ?

@Nos7algiK I’m not weaponizing anything. You’re just not getting my elaboration. I’m just using the closest word we have to explain it. The word nothing wouldn’t exist if it didn’t point somewhere (or nowhere). God is an experience, but nothingness can only be realized. But you can’t experience nothing. When you go deep enough as god, all of existence will go away like when you go to sleep, and then come back. You’ll realize it happened, like when you go to sleep, but you won’t experience it, like when you go to sleep. And then you realize nothingness is the deepest realization because it’s the only way god can not exists. Non existence.

Yeah, sounds like a typical budhhist definition of cessation. Where all experience dissapears. A dip into a nibbana. In some schools they say one doesn't even have to go through god to enter nibbana. It's possible to skip it and go straight to nothingness. Or you can use god as a stepping stone to go to nirvana. Just adding some thoughs here

You are weaponizing dualistic language. But, what we are pointing to is much like Russian dolls. At it's core in a Russian doll there is nothing. "Outside" that nothing is the doll(God). Outside God there is nothing. Outside that nothing is another doll "God". This goes on forever, but there must be a final answer right? What is the biggest concept of them all? Is the doll the ultimate ground or is there more nothing outside that ground? There will always be more to see as we increase the scope of our consciousness. There is no answer or should I say the answer isn't set in duality this/that. The idea of a Russian doll already implies it's nothingness both inside and out. They are one in the same but even a Russian doll (God) isn't the most accurate term for what we are pointing to.

@Judy2 Yes. That’s how you can take it back. And it’s deeper than god because if god can go away, then nothingness is the only thing that can be deeper. And because god can not exist anymore, that makes it more than just a part of god. Beyond god.

@Salvijus Im confident it is what they’re talking about, enlightened masters, and that’s why they say they can’t explain it in words. Because when they do, people believe that they’ve attained it after experiencing emptiness. That’s why I can tell people that are saying nothingness is just a part of god or that god is the ultimate realization just haven’t realized true nothingness yet, just emptiness and infinity. And when they go through formlessness and infinity, they think “this state is what they meant!” And that you can experience it. You can’t experience it, only realize it happened. Leo also said everything is a state, making me believe he hasn’t realized it either. They call it the stateless state, because it isn’t a state. At all. God goes away. That’s why they say atman and Brahman. God is the ultimate atman. And just like everything else there’s a pendulum so there is a final Brahman. True enlightenment is post god realization when nothing exists, and then comes back.

So I am sorry guys for not engaging with you or responding to you in this thread I thought I have successfully temporarily suspended my problems and engaged in actively trying to fix them but I thought now I might open up here again since this seems to be a reoccurring issue for which I am deeply embedded and reminded of because of the guilt I feel for wasting my potential as a teen and young adult in the past five years. I will open up here with the emotional, anger, and mood issues I am facing here with myself and some reoccurring psychosomatic issues for the past several years: ''I am currently engaged still and bound up in a very toxic codependent family relationship with my only dad (after my mother has passed away when I was a kid) without gaining a modicum of financial independence for myself or being currently unemployed since I am studying and trying to wound up some subjects at faculty and trying to decide and make a decision will I still be going to faculty after all or will try to enlist in a college for social work that recognizes the exams I passed up until now on sociology and to before that attempt to find some part-time job, so I can get a revenue stream that will be my own, and not relying exclusively upon a family pension from my deceased mother's work internship as a programmer at a bank in Canada and a brief part-time as an accountant at the postal service here in my home country that I get for being a regular student at faculty or any higher education institution starting that lasts until I turn 26 while I am still at faculty or college, that my dad uses to cover part of his life and apartment bill expenses, since he has an irreuglar not stable income (income by performance) as German and English teacher in a private school via his temporary several months renewable contracts. So I am trying to see to pass some more exams here in the winter period but my long term prospects for remaining on this state faculty are called into question, I am feeling that it would be a dragged out and wasteful affair only for the sake of keeping the pension income from the state and that I can retain for the next two years anyway by enrolling into this private college for social work. Anyways what worries me to most is the fact that I haven't changed my habits enough (I still have problems falling asleep at night late, even after I meditate, I would wake up at 3 or 4 am after having some nightmares (like insects, centipedes walking over my arms, biting and eating me) and wouldn't fall asleep till early in the morning when the sun comes up), and would feel casual fatigue and profound tiredness during the day at noon and would have to lay down and sleep for half an hour or an hour until I feel I've drowned into nothingness after the felt emotional fatigue, turmoil, and emptiness I would feel during the day and I feel sometimes so tired at that point that I don't feel I have the strenght to last meditating for 30 minutes and that during that I would just roll over or fall asleep afterward anyway. So the point of me writing this all is to ask should be guided by my feelings in pursuing a certain course of action for my life and not take into account the insecurities and the needs of others like my dad's (who would still receive the pension regardless if I would enroll into this private college for two more years) I have until summer when the entrance exam for this is coming up to decide and I feel I have to pass a few exams here in the winter period to prove I am really serious about this and to find some part-time job with a steady income to cover a part of my expenses left for this faculty and for the private college. Also, I haven't mentioned it in detail but I will the severed bonds and relationships with my other relatives and grandparents from my mother's side that I feel that I need to heal, rekindle and regain their trust again after I acted passively, uninterestedly and didn't call them to ask them how they are doing and how are they (didn't call my aunt to congratulate her on her birthday in the summer) towards them for several months now, which I feel an obligation towards especially my step sister to whom I feel a brotherly duty towards to somehow help her in the future, when she, for example, enrolls into a faculty here in Belgrade when she is old enough, and friends (one from highschool and two girls who I've met in faculty) who were kind and caring enough to offer me their assistance with a job and advice for my mental health problems this past and last year especially with the Covid outbreak lockdown situation, online courses have done independently, my grandfather who I've seen a role model and guide for life difficulties and independence passing away, and my mother's passing away fifteenth aniversary, that I betrayed and lost their trust by not calling them back and answering them while I was in a self-imposed isolation during the start of my autumn semester at the fourth year at faculty, that I am trying to see now to how to make it up with them, regain their trust in me and for them to forgive me and give a second chance (they are on the latest of the list of people I haven't called back and answered back for a long time now in some cases months in others a year has passed (them being my sociology professor from highschool and my other relatives sister) that I feel for my sake I should try to rekindle my relationship with and to ask them for their forgiveness and for them to regain trust in me by showing them I've changed and have overcome my selfish and unheatlhy patterns of caring and trying to love nobody but myself). Thanks for hearing me out this is just the tip of the iceberg of things I feel bad and guilty about and that I am losing sleepover, and others being my failed perception of my personal life purpose that I need to somehow repay a debt towards, the failure towards the perceived expectations of people who've I looked towards as role models and heroes through the in comparison to my own state, achievements and actions up until this point in my their own Herculean feats and achievements they made for their own lives for my own life as being an evolving continuation of their successes and ancestors who made possible and leftover for me the cushiness and relative financial securities that I enjoyed through their own strivings, achievements and successes in their own lives and the mission of my soul on this Earth, which I've been thinking and contemplating about and will discuss here more in detail if that thread wouldn't be more appropriate for the Life Purpose Issues Subsection of the Forum.''

@BipolarGrowth I can’t watch it right now but I know frank yang has said before there’s one more emptiness after god. I’m not sure if it’s the true nothingness that you can’t really personally experience, or the void, but either way he’s on to something. True enlightenment is realizing there is nothing beyond infinity, and actually realizing that true nothingness.